A Derpy Apocalypse: Dead Mare Walking

Derpy woke up the next morning to a wet muddy ground. There was a path of gravel going in several places around the camp, but along that gravel was a ditch that lead near all of the tents, and some directly to them. In those ditches ran water. It had rained the other night, and some of the water had intruded into Derpy's tent. Derpy cursed under her breath and proceeded to walk out of the tent. She felt a couple of raindrops from the completely blanketed sky. It was winter time, so the rain was colder than usual. There were very small traces of snow mixed in with the puddles of rainwater, but it was quickly melting in the 46 degree weather. Ditsy inhaled the chilly winter air and walked up to the gravel path, occasionally getting her hooves wet from the muddy puddles in the little groups of grassy plants. She shook off her hind legs and entered into a large tent for eating. She saw a pile of brochures on the counter, so she decided to pick one up and read it. It stated:

"BASIC/STARTER RULES OF THE TURNER/SCRATCH CAMP:

1. Eat all meals matching the meal chart in the rule book

2. Eat only three meals a day

3. Fighting is NOT allowed, you can be thrown out of the camp for it.

4. NEVER EVER EVER shout 'zeds' when joking, you will be executed or expelled.

5. Always contribute to defending the camp, everypony is helpful.

~For More Rules, look at the rule book found in a special tray in the mail/books tent~"

Derpy put down the brochure and looked around for a rule book. When she found one, she looked at the eating chart and all the eating rules. After that, she got herself something to eat.

While she was eating, Time Turner sat down beside her with a meal of his own. Derpy had some toast and orange juice, Turner had hot tea and bread.

"Hiya." Derpy said with a smile.

"Hello." Turner replied. He soaked his bread in his tea and ate it. "Mmm thrrsh irsh drrishirrsh." he mumbled.

"Wut." Derpy said with a blank look on her face. Turner quickly swallowed his food and looked at Derpy.

"Ha, I said 'mmm this is delicious.'" he turned back to his food and laughed. Derpy gave a sarcastic chuckle.

"So have you heard the news?" Turner asked.

"What news..." Derpy responded.

"The gathering tonight," Turner said. "they are talking about all of the new knowledge of the zombie virus! They know EVERYTHING, the different types of zeds, the way they all work, weaknesses, and also..." he stopped for a moment with a strange smile on his face. "A vaccine!"

"Really?" Derpy asked.

"Yes!" Time Turner responded, grabbed both of Derpy's arms and shook her as he continued with what he was saying. "That means the apocalypse is near it's end!" Derpy got her eyes back in order, somewhat, and responded,

"Wow...you seem...really excited..."

"Yes again!" Turner replied once more with a huge smile on his face. "That means no more blood, gore, and death!"

"Yeah..." Derpy said in a lower tone. "I hope."

"What do you mean?" Turner asked with a more, concerning tone than last time.

"I mean...some parts of Equestria aren't nice, and the apocalypse makes it easier for the bad ponies to..." Derpy said, before stopping. "you know..."

"Oh..." Turner replied. "I'm sorry ma'am..."

"What's your name?" Derpy asked suddenly.

"Oh um, I'm sorry I never introduced myself!" Turner replied. "My name is Time Turner, I work with all the, Timey-Wimey things in Ponyville, some ponies call me Doctor Hooves."

"Yeah, my names Derpy Hooves, and I---" Derpy realized something. "Wait, is your last name Hooves?"

"Yes..." Turner Responded. "Time Turner is my nickname, ponies who write my name in stories and fanfics may call me Turner for short."

"What?" Derpy asked.

"Oh sorry, I must have broken the fourth wall..." Turner said winking at you the reader. Back to reality now.

"Anyway..." Derpy said. "Strangers call me Derpy Hooves, close friends call me Ditsy Doo, and the bullies called me Bubbles."

"Oh well, nice to meet you, Ditsy." Time Turner said, shaking Derpy's hoof.

"Are you implying that you are my close friend now?" Derpy asked.

"Maybe." Turner said with a wink. Derpy chuckled and continued to eat her breakfast.

~~~

Throughout the day, some stallions would joke about the two being a 'cute couple,' or singing the casual so and so up in a tree blah blah blah, but they didn't mind it much. No pony got really offensive about it anyway, so there wasn't a real reason to get mad. Eventually things got to the point where Ditsy and Turner talked to each other all the time, and were with each other every time they were awake. They were best friends. But unfortunately, Derpy had to keep things from going farther until she found out about Gunny's final letter. She didn't want to deceive him. A part of him still existed within Derpy, she didn't want to feel any guilt.

The meeting thing was about to start, it was in five minutes exactly, and it was about 6:25 PM. Derpy and Turner got in the meeting tent with a couple of researcher ponies, with Vinyl and Dash. Upon entering, Derpy glared at Rainbow Dash, Dash looked back with regret in her eyes. Derpy gave her a smile, then returned to the normal glare of hatred. This may have slightly confused Rainbow Dash, but that wasn't of Derpy's concern as of now. She waved at Vinyl, who waved back, and took her seat. The other ponies took a seat as well and got ready to start talking.

"Alright everypony, listen up." Vinyl said. "This is our latest information on the Zeds." She nodded to Rainbow Dash.

"Yes..." Rainbow Dash said. "our top researchers have been contributing ninety percent of their day, dedicating it to the knowledge of ending the apocalypse."

"And Equestria...pfft." one anonymous stallion said, snickering. Vinyl took out a magnum and put it between his eyes.

"I swear, if you say another word, I will make your death slow and painful." She said, cocking her magnum.

"Y-yes...ma'am..." the stallion stuttered.

"Continue." Vinyl stated, putting her magnum down in a holster she was wearing, and sitting down.

"Anyway..." Rainbow Dash said, making it obvious in her tone, that she was pissed off. "the researchers, for an anonymous reason, have requested Carrot Top, our assassin, and L.R.S.K., to state the discoveries for them." Carrot Top stood up, and grabbed some papers, sorting them out.

"Okay...uhm..." Carrot Top started a bit shaky. "Okay! Here is what the paper says:" she looked hard at the paper and put it down.

"We have researched many types of zeds and so far we have classified the following:

"Normal Zed, Hive-Minder, Flying Zed, Pouncer, Juggernaut, and Shredder.

"Normal Zeds have a life-span without food for three days, with food, three years. They are only killed when the brain is disconnected from the body.

"Flying Zeds are about the same, except the virus has taken it over to allow it to fly.

"Pouncers are a type of advanced Earth-Pony-Infected-Mutation, or E.P.I.M. They have the ability to pounce an uninfected individual, UI, with great force, and devour them quickly.

"Juggernauts are another type of E.P.I.M., that are filled with advanced muscular cells, giving them massive strength to burst through barriers, walls, throw cars, many impossible things that normal ponies cannot do. They have a longer life span, Normal Life Span NLSx3

"Shredders have an NLS, but have the ability to pounce, not as strong as a pouncer, but with sharp teeth, and claws replacing its hooves to shred its prey.

"Hive-Minders have an infinite life span, fed or not. They are unicorns, that can create a hivemind to control a group of zeds to attack a certain spot. They are as advanced as our royal guard. The only way to kill them, unlike all other zeds, is to completely destroy the mind. They can grow back whatever is missing, unless their brain is COMPLETELY eradicated."

Carrot Top put down the papers and nodded to Vinyl.

"Any questions?" she asked. Derpy raised her hoof. "Yes Derpy?" Vinyl said.

"Derpy?" said one stallion. "I don't believe it!" said another, this sparked a huge conversation between everypony.

"HEY SHUT UP YOU PEOPLE, I'M ANSWERING ONE QUESTION!" Vinyl shouted, banging her hoof on the table. That didn't appear to do anything. Derpy took out her Desert Eagle and fired it into the air. Everypony stopped.

"Did she not make herself clear enough for you?" she asked. "Will I have to drive a hole in your head for it to get in there?!"

"Well said Derpy..." Vinyl said. "Now, as I was saying, what was your question?"

"What about the alicorns? What happens when they get infected?" Derpy asked.

"Well, as far as I know, they don't." Vinyl replied. "A magic, destroys their brain so that the virus can't get them, it's within prophecy, very complex, you would have to ask Princess Twilight, wherever the buck she is."

"Mmkay." Derpy said sitting back down.

"Any other questions?" Vinyl asked. Nopony raised their hand. "Well in that case," Vinyl said again.

"You are dismissed."

~~~

Everypony gave their goodnights and went to sleep in their tents. Derpy and Turner walked back to their tents. Turner noticed that somehow, Ditsy had managed to be moved over to the tent beside him, but he didn't mention it in fear that she would move back somehow.

"Goodnight, Doctor." Derpy said waving.

"Goodnight, Ditsy!" Turner said waving and going in his tent. Derpy sighed, and went into her own.