Sick In The Clouds

Applejack reluctantly trotted off to Dash’s kitchen feeling the heat of Dashie’s stare observe her bare rump. She never really did understand her friend’s fascination with other ponies no matter who she laid eyes on.

Entering the kitchen for a second time Applejack’s muzzle scrunched up to the awful smell remitting from the place. Attempting to take small breaths, the cowmare cautiously approached the microwave which the aroma emanated. With a swift tug she opened the burnt door only to be ambushed with the source of the foul stench.

A pile of burnt black goop bubbled inside the microwave that was not decipherable unless Applejack dared to ask.

“Rainbow Dash, what has happened in your microwave?” Applejack yelled from the kitchen grabbing the pile of substance and tossed it into a nearby trash bin without a look back.

“Oh hehe well you see Applejack I attempted to make porridge for myself a few nights ago but I didn't realize some other ponies’ wet garments were shoved in the microwave so it all exploded, neat right?”

“Seriously, you have no dignity!” Applejack gagged at the thought and immediately went to washing her hooves.

“Hey you’re in my house, my rules now where is that smoothie I asked for miss maid?” Rainbow Dash scoffed tilting her head upside down on her cloud couch.

Applejack snarled and muffled something under her breathe of the name and headed for the fridge. Upon opening the grand, metallic containment unit as she feasted her eyes on a few rotten bananas and curdled carton of milk.

“Sugercube you don’t have ingredients to make a smoothie, I’m going to have to go shopping for you,” the orange mare sighed heading back to the sick pegasus cleaning up trash along the way. “Why did you keep the rotten bananas anyway, going to make banana bread?

Rainbow Dash kept silent letting a sly, innocent grin spread through her pale face earning another disgusting remark from Applejack.

After wrapping all the empty pizza boxes and bento boxes into a trash bag, the earth pony placed it in the bin and went to change out of her get up.

“No way ma’am, you’re going to the grocery store wearing that there costume,” Rainbow Dash giggled forcing her body out of her comfortable position. “Anyway, it really suits you!”

“No way Rainbow can’t see folks seeing me like this in public!” the cowmare pleaded hoping to receive mercy from her friend.

“Come on Aj! Other pegasi see me with others dressed up all the time!” Rainbow Dash calmly reassured as she slung a turquoise

sweater she found upon the piles scattered throughout the floor. “I was seen with a nurse, cop, and secretary and on one special occasion I got a stallion to dress up as a ninja!”

“I assume that was one heck of a night,” Applejack rolled her eyes helping slide the hoodie over Dash’s matted head.

“Oh you know it Jackie, he pulled out all his katakana’s and combo’s, jealous?” Rainbow Dash slurred giving a pair of bedroom eyes to her friend. “Besides if you don’t come to the store like that won’t allow you to make me feel better, now we wouldn't want that now would we?”

Applejack stared dumbstruck at such accusations and willingly nodded her head in fury. Rainbow Dash lead the way down some cloud stairs on the right of the damaged door to her garage.

“Feast your eyes freckles!” the pegasus grinned turning the lights on for the grand reveal.

Applejack couldn’t believe the wealth of the pegasus and her variety of rare, spotless vehicles that lay upon a crystal clear tiled floor and spotlights above each master piece.

Big glamorous trucks to small scooters seemed to create an endless hallway of powerful machines beyond her eyes reach. Quads and monster trucks lined the first half with little buggies taking up space of the next section. She could barely make out a dried patch of unknown liquid on a two seated motorbike that made Applejack cringe.

Finally at the end was a bright neon blue cloud powered Rolls Royce. Rainbow Flames were spray painted among the sides with Rainbow Dash’s initials stained on the hood. Large cyan wings were molded to shape the doors with silver stained tires, the teeth sporting the Pegasus’s cutie mark. Added jet turbines were secured to the back with pristine white seats and a clear wheel filled with the same spectrum for her rainbow waterfall flowing inside. Applejack may have not been a big machine fanatic, but this was one heck of a ride.

“Will you stop drooling and get you flank in here Apples?” Rainbow Dash groaned with anticipation securing her lightning bolt shaped seatbelt.

“How did you…Dash this is amazing!” Applejack spoke breathlessly barely able to secure herself in her seat.

“Oh this old thing? My dad’s old hunk of junk but I decided to pimp it up just a little bit,” the Pegasus smoothly said opening the glove cabinet pulling out another pair of her shades.

“Just a little bit? This is a master piece Dash I…wait how did you teleport your shades here?” Applejack asked adjusting her outfit to suit the position.

“I need to look awesome wherever I go, so I tuck a couple hundred of these babies everywhere!” Rainbow Dash smirked adjusting her mirrors.

Before Applejack could ask another question a loud rumble was heard with vibrations that sent shivers up the cowmare’s spine. The roar of the engine purred as Rainbow Dash clicked one of her many garage doors open and stomped on the gas petal. The vehicle zoomed at the speed of sound out of the cloud mansion and soared above PonyVille at raging speeds.

“Twilight what was that noise, I do believe I heard something!” Celestia questioned in between mouthfuls of chocolate cake.

“Oh it’s probably nothing, nothing at all!” Twilight Sparkle nervously comforted inside her library sharing and afternoon cake get together with her mentor as Applejack flew past her window behind the lesser knowing ruler.

“Slow…down Dash ahhh!” Applejack hollered for her life not being able to admire the luscious scenery of her view up in the clouds.

At last she could barely make out the grocery center in the distance as Rainbow Dash slammed on the brakes.

Applejack was shot forward becoming breathless from the shock of the seat-belt impaling into her stomach.

“Now that is how you travel Jackie, I would suggest you take notes,” Rainbow Dash shrugged off the insane journey as she exited the vehicle, locking it in the process.

Applejack clutched her stomach gasping for air as she ached stepped onto the cloud paved parking lot wobbling into the automatic doors of the grocery mart.

“Cloud condiments, once some of the lights went broken and disfigured so it spelt ’loud condoms’ it was great!” the cyan Pegasus chuckled nudging her friend in the ribs.

“Il’ just get what you need under my approval and then we are getting the heck out of here!” Applejack mumbled gaining eyes of passer bye’s from her appearance as she ignored Rainbow’s remark.

Everything was clean with moped tiles and a pale yellow wallpaper with imagery of pegasi adorning the walls. Applejack got a hold of a cloud molded cart as she and Dash officially entered the food emporium with rows upon rows of your average store bought goods.

Avoiding eye contact with anyone she pushed the object forward as fast as she could pausing in the cereal section.

“Rainbow Dash we are going to need strawberries, milk and some ice-cream for your shake and some other ingredients for a proper stocked fridge,” Applejack listed off her requests to the uninterested shaded face of her sick friend.

“Hey Applejack let’s get some Adventure-O’s, don’t worry I promise to share!” Rainbow Dash grinned ignoring her friend’s thoughts, handing her the cereal box.

“This won’t do you any good Rainbow, now stop acting like a child and let’s hurry up!” Applejack sighed handing the box back to her friend, glancing at the signs to find her way to the dairy section.

“Oh come on Aj, Daring Do is on the cover and it even comes with a free sticker!” Rainbow rambled on to herself not realizing her friend’s disappearance. “It even has a little maze I could do on the, ok well I just completed it but it has to be good for me! Its cinnamon and berry flavored and those are good for you right? AS I look at the nutrients though it seems to contain some marshmallow bits, actually it’s all just marshmallow bits bu-.” Rainbow Dash ended her trail of words glancing around to discover her friend has left her.

Applejack scanned aisle upon aisle in the large supermarket that was larger than it appeared to be. Children cried when she passed by as stallions gave a second glance at her, having their wings ponf up.

She merely grumbled to herself finally reaching the chilled section grabbing a carton of milk and a tub of ice-cream. As she finished browsing the freezing aisle she noticed the supply of apple cider being unloaded from the shelves into a crate holding Rainbow’s address on it. She couldn't help but smile at her confusing friend as she made her way to the fresh fruit and vegetables only to notice her sick friend’s return standing on top of an empty cashier’s conveyor belt.

“Listen up everypony, we have a missing pony lost in the store!” Rainbow Dash urgently shouted into the employee’s microphone walking on the new found moving treadmill under her feet as the conveyor belt automatically shifted. “A pony named Mrs. Tits Mcgee is missing, she was last seen jerking off in a maid costume into the milk jugs!”

The whole store bustled with laughter all turning their heads to Applejack innocently placing a container of mixed berries in her basket of other produce. Her cheek flushed a crimson red as she rushed to Rainbow Dash and yanked her off her position.

“That was not funny Dash, now shut up and pay for this stuff!” Applejack harshly whispered into Rainbow’s ear.

“Oh my goodness, baby no need to get the munchies now, not in front of this large crowd!” Rainbow Dash hollered making a scene, misinterpreting her action for everyone to see.

“Rainbow Dash nice one you got there!” a male from the crowd shouted back.

“You know she would look like such a cutie in your pirate costume!” A woman form the crowd praised the Pegasus as Applejack quickly gave her items to the cashier.

“We love you Rainbow Dash!” a young filly fluttered.

“Would you like to donate to the conservation of narwhals?” the snooty cashier asked as she placed the items in the appropriate bags.

“No, please just hurry!” Applejack pondered not able to contain the embarrassment bottled up inside of her.

“Can I schedule an appointment with you Dashie?” Another member of the crowd cheered.

“How about offering your services to the knitting club?” the cashier continue to question. “Maybe to the ban of ugly sweaters while you’re at it.”

“No, no, no!”  Applejack panicked grabbing all the bags and carrying them in her mouth.

“Whoa, looks like someone is anxious to get back to the bedroom, just can’t keep her mouth full! Rainbow Dash basked in her glory as she scanned her platinum credit card across the scanner in one swift flick of her wing tips. “The Dash is out!”

Applejack huffed all the way to the luxury car as she roughly threw all the belongings inside, slamming the trunk for good measure. The ride home went in silence as applejack was barely phased that Rainbow Dash was exceeding the speed limit. Back at the cloud mansion in ten seconds flat she brought the food inside, still refusing to face her friend at this moment.

“Oh get over Applejack, not like you’re going to see those pegasi ever again!” Rainbow Dash attempted to lighten the move as she hollered a huge sneeze. “Besides *sniff* I threw in something special there for the both of us.”

The earth pony dug through her healthy products on Dash’s kitchen counter only to find a an out of place box in the midst of all her items.

“Corndogs, really Dash?” Applejack shrugged throwing the box into the freezer without a care.

“Will you let me eat them if I were to do it seductively?” Rainbow Dash remarked mimicking the movement with her hooves.

“No.”

“They are really good think you would even love the starchy goodness!”

“I said no, now I’m going to prepare you a proper meal.” Applejack sternly responded washing all of her produce “Maybe later but not now.”

“I must admit you look cute when you work, now then don’t forget that smoothie,” Rainbow Dash smiled as she dived onto her couch to rest.

Applejack once again rolled her eyes saluting to her new found mistress the moment as she started to slice and season her variety of vegetables for a hot broth.

She nestled them into a pan to be grilled as a hearty aroma filled the room of grilled peppers, corn and carrots. The new aroma replaced the smell that was there  earlier that morning as the cowmare took it all in adding all the foreign spices  she could pronounce it Rainbow’s five star kitchen.

Before long a familiar raw stench filled the room as Applejack glanced at the forbidden microwave that was now up in flames.

“Rainbow Dash your concoction remains have caught flame, where is your extinguisher!” Applejack attempted to remain calm anxiously looking at the surprisingly calm structure of Rainbow Dash.

“Hmm maybe I will tell you if you dress up like a feminine fire fighter for me!” The cyan pegasus came out of her daze from the delicious smell from Applejack’s home cooking as she dug through her couch and pulled out the frilly outfit.

“This is an emergency, you can’t possible expect me to-“Applejack panicked as she was tossed the costume feeling the heat of the flames creep up on her.

Reluctantly but in a flash Applejack threw off her maid outfit and roughly strapped the next costume on. It barely resembled a true firemen outfit- with flamed lace trailing up the bodice with matching scarlet boots and hat adorned with bows. Applejack felt the heavy accessory on top which was a seductively shaped extinguisher which she frantically used on the fire.

White cloudy liquid squirted all over the microwave finally putting out the flames as she wiped a dribble of sweat from her brow.

“That was hot, literally! I think I prefer my maid though so I suggest you go change and get back to pleasing your mistress you hear?” Rainbow Dash pushed the grand event aside as she nestled herself into her blanket and dozed off into a sickly asleep.