Discord, Lord of Riddles

Now called the Badlands, the area to the far South of modern day Canterlot is drastically different now from how it was 16,000 years ago. As I knew it then, that land was a fertile garden of unimaginable natural wealth. Now, it's a sweltering desert, devoid of life except for the the remaining Changeling population.

It was there that I immigrated to next. Prosperous and promising, tales of its grandeur attracted me to it.

But before I reached my destination, I would encounter him.

Discord, Lord of Chaos.

Well there I was. Minding my own damn business, walking along a narrow dirt road that led south toward the ice-caped mountain ranges the boarded the Domain of Changelings. I was on my merry way when all of a sudden something caught my right, hind leg. Thinking at first it was a just a root or something that my claw had gotten caught on - I yanked hard, only to feel slight popping in my joints as the leg stretched. Looking back I could see my appendage was slowly sinking into the earth. Of all things! In the middle of no where, sinking sand?

So, I did what any phooka would do and I changed forms in hopes of dislodging myself. To my surprise, no matter what form I took, my leg continued to sink ever slower.

Suddenly, I heard a unctuous voice call out to me, "Well if it isn't the ugly ducking, turned away from the nest?"

"Who the hell are you?" I asked, turning to eye the draconequus before me. I had heard stories of Discord from Father Tree, but I never imagined he'd be such a pompous ass face to face. By the gods! He was even uglier than me, and age sure hasn't treated him well. Of course, nowadays, I'm not afraid to say something like that to his face - I'd crush him - but back then, heck no. I would have rather have avoided a conflict with him back then. Especially considering that he had the drop on me, I was going to try my darnedest to be polite.

"Why I'm Discord, the Lord of Chaos," he smirked.

"How quaint, now if you could please help me? As you can clearly see, I'm kinda in a predicament here."

"Only if you ask nicely, ugly ducking."

"Please?" I asked, gritting my teeth; holding back my anger.

"With a cherry on top?"

"Yes, with - a - cherry - on - top!"

"OK then," and with that, he summoned a magic wand, and cast some sort of cheesy spell on my leg.

It didn't help me... what an utter surprise.

Not only was my right leg sinking, my left leg was now going along with it; and I was sinking faster still. I could feel the circulation in my rear appendages slowly beginning to cut off. A tingling sensation came over my feet. I was growing desperate, but I couldn't advertise it. Not to that bastard's amusement. I hid my fear as best I could.

"Aw come on! You have got to be kidding me?" I said in forced monotone.

"Oops, sorry! You should have been more specific on what you meant by help," he laughed.

I had enough. My youthful anger was getting to me.

"Are you blind? What in Tartarus does it look like I need help with?" I asked, looking back at my knees which were almost wholly absorbed into the ground.

Looking back at Discord, I saw he was now wearing pair of darkened glasses, and holing a white cane in his paw. "No need to raise your voice young one. I'm all ears," and with that, he smacked me on the head with the cane.

That bastard annoys the hell out of me...

I thought hard of what to say next. What could I possibly say that would manipulate him into letting me out? It didn't matter though. Discord had other plans, as I soon found out.

"Tell you what ugly ducking, lets play a game?" suggested Discord.

"What?" I asked, absolutely confounded.

"I'll tell you a series of three riddles, and if you guess them all correctly I'll let you go. You have all the time you need to answer them." And with that he gave a little chuckle at his own jibe.

"Well shit?" is mumbled. I guess playing along was my only hope for survival.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes, I'm ready."

"Are you sure?" he asked in a dubious voice, pointing his cane in my face.

"Absolutely, positively ready." I said, in annoyance.

The draconequus leaned down, and met me eye to eye. After licking his lips and wiggling his brow, he asked the first riddle, "I have a heart of gold, and I smell when I'm old. What am I?"

Unknown to the Lord of Chaos, I was (and still am) a master of riddles - it was one of the few pastimes the Ents enjoyed occupy their free time with - and trust me, they had a lot of free time. After being around them for 1000 years, the answers to just about ever riddle imaginable, no matter how obscure, came second nature to me.

With a smirk, I answered, "The answer is, I'm an egg."

"No fair!" pouted Discord.

"Next!" I demanded impatiently. Time was most certainly of the essence.

"What's black when you get it, red when you use it, and white when you're all through with it? Ha!"

"Simple... charcoal," I replied defiantly, rolling my eyes.

Discord huffed and puffed around; he thumped his tail angrily at my expedient answering of his used riddles. I could see a fury building in his eyes; even greater than Sharowdon. Suddenly, to my surprise, his fit of rage stopped. Like an arrow shot into sod - abruptly stopping - his intense anger quelled instantly. Little at first, soon a large, devious... dastardly grin came over his face. It had me worried, even if I wan't showing it. I couldn't see past that damned grin! Despite his display of extreme emotion, the smile was strangely... worryingly... disturbingly void of sentiment. It was as if his smile existed simply to be a smile, not alluding in the slightest to Discord's inner feelings... if he has any.

"Ah! You'll never get this one!" smirked Discord, "Stopped like hardened sap, it sinks down, into an Earthly trap. In sight of journeys end, the adventure is extend. Black from head to toe, no one know when he come and go. White all over, one has little time to mull it over. Who am I? Ha - ha - ha!"

It didn't take me long to discern the answer, or so I though.

The answer seemed blatantly simple at first, "That's the oldest trick in the book Discord! The answer is me! I'm who the riddle is about."

"Nope!"

"What?!"

"Good try! Guess again!" he said with a mask of malevolence.

How could this be? How could 'I' not possible be the correct answer?

By now the ground was up to my waist. It was becoming painful. My heart was racing, which didn't make it any better. The submersion was gaining speed! Circulation was cut off in my legs almost entirely, but I had to focus. My life depended on it! Mind racing, I thought back to every riddle I'd ever known. I thought deep, deep like lacerations forming on my brain because I was thinking so bucking hard!

I kept on thinking, every possibility flew through my head.

Vocally pained, I strained, "A fool! That's the answer, a fool!"

Discord vocalized his reply in a mockingly unpresuming manner, "Not quite." The draconequus' smile remained emotionless as a porcelain doll.

"Aww, come on!"

"Guess again." he said, pressing his head against mine.

I saw it; I really did. I could see the murderous intentions in his eyes. The Discord I knew then wasn't so benevolent. Questions of death paraded within my consciousness. Was this where I was going to die? Was this the end?

Nope.

It dawned on me. By the mercy of Sól, the answer to Discord's riddle struck me like the mountain crushed Sharowdon! I had figured out the cryptic riddle, and in the simplest of ways. I had realized the conundrum itself was a red herring. It misleads the thinker into believing the subject in question is a traveler, or actual individual, but in reality it was something that exhibits the riddle's clues.

At the last possible second, I blurted out the answer.

"Death! The answer is 'I am Death!'"

"Right on the money, sonny!" squealed Discord, with delight. At that point, the bastard had obviously gotten enough out of my displeasure not to be pleased by my success. Already, at that exact moment, he was probably planning when to interlude me again on my journey.

Instantly, my body was released form the Earth. At first I was so grateful, but then the pain started. Blood flooded back into my lower extremities, and my... my particulars. The pain was ungodly. I tried to scream, but all I could produce was a faint, "Ow."

"We'll, I suppose I'll be going then," said Discord, just as he placed a hat on his head, and picked up some travel baggage from thin air.

Right before that bastard got away, I called out to him, "Wait!"

"Yes?"

"Aren't you going to give me some sort of compensation? You've delayed me in my journey, I expect some sort of award for participating in your shenanigans!" I demanded. There was no way Discord was getting off scot-free from torturing me.

"Well, well, well... well. What do we have here? A sore whiner? Boo hoo hoo!"

"You bet," I said panting from my recent pain, "And as for yourself, you won't have such a smug look on your face when I awaken that drake resting on that hilltop over there," I added, pointing to an empty hill adjacent to the road.

The fool tuned to look,"Where? I don't see any drake over there."

"That's because I'm right here!" I bellowed, morphing into a behemoth First Drake. I had transfigured into an impression of Sharowdon, and a damn good one at that. Lunging forward like a cannon shot, I extended my immense fore claws and caught Discord in a deathly grip. Fury burned in my eyes, as I wailed, "You cur! You tried to kill me!"

I forgot to mention I could do that.

With the strength of a colossus, I grabbed Discord by his neck, and pinned him to the ground with full force. The ground trembled as I bared down. My claws bound my tormentor to the ground, immobilizing him like worm in a hungry bird's grasp. This time I wasn't going to be the victim. Heat of rage was imitating from my ridged stance, tension filled the air.

Discord tried to use his powers to escape, but it didn't work. The grasp of a First Drake cannot be escaped so easily.

"How do you like a taste of your own medicine?" I growled angrily, with a spice of revenge.

"Hmm, it taste quite bitter." he curtly replied, smacking his lips sarcastically. He rolled his eyes with disdain. Again, the emotionless smile took to his visage.

"I don't think you understand the gravity of the situation?"

"Do you?"

Before I could reply, my body began to feel extremely heavy. Discord suddenly disappeared from my steely grasp as his physical form disintegrated into dust. The last thing I remember was my body slumping onto the road. It felt like an extreme weight that was all over me; yet, I felt no pressure. I blacked out.

Author's Note

This chapter is a bit shorter than the previous one.

Hope you enjoyed it none the less!