My eyes snapped open as I remembered that the Summer Sun Celebration was that very night. I reared back, inarticulately screaming my frustration to the heavens.

Which, when translated from my perception to reality, amounted to flopping backward and making a noise that sounded something along the lines of "blurgh." I slowly shifted myself out of bed and then to my wardrobe to recharge again. One stream of magic later, and I didn't feel rested at all, but I did feel like I'd just drank fourteen cups of coffee. I supposed that would suffice.

Before I left, I grabbed a few articles of clothing out of my wardrobe. They were rich golden robes similar to the ones I was wearing, but with a hood, and there was so much magic coursing through them that even without my goggles I could see shimmers and ripples of color in the surface of it. I stowed them in my saddlebag for the time being, along with another wand, which I liked to call the Immortal Stick. More than likely, none of them would prove necessary, but you never knew when it came to immortal princesses of the night who were possessed by vengeful demons.

I made my way back into the town, weaving through the irregular road patterns toward the town hall, goggles down at full power and wand ready to intercept any surprise bolts of magic. Nopony paid much attention to me, which spoke volumes about the strange things this town must have seen.

The crowd around the town hall buzzed quietly, chattering away about random little things that came to mind. Suddenly, a fanfare began to play, and the chatter stopped. A spotlight shone on the base of a tower in the center of the hall, revealing the mare I assumed was the mayor.

"Fillies and gentlecolts," she announced, "as mayor of Ponyville, it is my great pleasure to announce the beginning of the Summer Sun Celebration!" The crowd cheered gleefully. "In just a few moments, our town will witness the magic of the sunrise, and celebrate this, the longest day of the year! And now, it is my great honor to introduce to you the ruler of our land, the very pony who gives us the sun and the moon each and every day, the good, the wise, the bringer of harmony to all of Equestria..." I suppressed a snort, then glanced at the moon for a moment and frowned grimly. The surface was bare.

"...Princess Celestia!" the mayor finished. A white unicorn mare pulled a rope, parting the curtains on the balcony to reveal...nothing. The entire crowd gasped in an extremely theatrical manner, whereas I sat there, completely unsurprised. Everypony began talking nervously, and then the mayor spoke up. "Remain calm, everypony, there must be a reasonable explanation!"

The mare exclaimed from up on the balcony, "She's gone!" The crowd gasped yet again, even more theatrically than before, which I hadn't been certain was possible. A blue fog billowed up on the platform, and out of it stepped none other than Nightmare Moon herself.

"Oh, my beloved subjects," she began, grinning horrendously. "It's been so long since I've seen your precious, little sun-loving faces."

Somepony yelled at Nightmare from below, taking off and flying toward her. Another mare caught her by the tail, holding her back. "What did you do with our Princess?!"

Nightmare chuckled. "Why, am I not royal enough for you? Don't you know who I am?" A mare who sounded like she was on a massive sugar high started rattling off names, until a cupcake got shoved into her mouth. I sat there amusedly. "Does my crown no longer count now that I have been imprisoned for a thousand years? Did you not recall the legend? Did you not see the signs?"

At that moment, Twilight spoke up. "I did. And I know who you are. You're the Mare in the Moon - Nightmare Moon!" I did a double take, fairly surprised, and the crowd gasped yet again.

"Jeez," I muttered, just loud enough for absolutely everypony to hear, "what is it with you ponies and gasping? And kudos to you, Twilight, for reading up on your lore!" I called. "I'm impressed!" Everypony had turned and was staring at me now. "I didn't think you'd know about Nightmare, being Celestia's student and all." Nightmare didn't seem to notice.

"Well well well, somepony who remembers me." I waved my hoof around sporadically in the air, as if to signal I was part of the ponies-who-remember-Nightmare-Moon-club too. "Then you also know why I'm here." Twilight started to say something, then trailed off. "Remember this day, little ponies," Nightmare warned, "for it was your last. From this moment forth, the night shall last forever!" She cackled evilly. I flailed my hoof around again.

"Hey, Oblivious MacMoonbutt!" I called tauntingly. Her gaze snapped toward me. "Over here!" She looked indescribably furious. If she knew how, her glare probably could have torn me to shreds.

"You insolent foal," she snarled. "How dare you insult me?"

"Like this," I replied casually. "It's easy. All I have to do is say something completely out of place or unsettling given the context, and then add enough sass to provoke you." Her horn ignited and a bolt rocketed towards me. It fizzled out right before it would have hit me, and I flung myself onto the ground in order to look incapacitated. Everypony gasped yet again, and backed away from me.

"Seize her!" the mayor ordered a nearby group of pegasi guards. "Only she knows where the Princess is!" she yelled as the guards took flight and attempted to swarm Nightmare Moon.

"Stay back, you fools!" Nightmare cackled. Her eyes glowed white with power, and lightning cracked down from the sky and knocked the guards away. Nightmare turned into a cloud of starry blue smoke, and flew out the door.

"Talk about drama," I muttered, standing up. Six or seven layers of protective fields and enchantments came in very handy in these situations.

As I stood, I saw the pegasus from before fly out the door after Nightmare, with Twilight following close behind. I spontaneously decided to tag along as well, and trotted out the door, catching the gaze of pretty much every pony in the building. I suppose it made sense, considering the fact that from their perspective, I'd just been completely incapacitated.

I halted right in front of the door to the library and knocked on it more times than were probably necessary. A muffled "Who is it?" came through the door.

"Just your friendly neighborhood thaumaturge," I replied, walking in without waiting for a response. Magical energy highs leave little room for patience.

Twilight was frantically searching through the assortment of books lining the walls as I walked in. "Elements, Elements, Elements! How am I supposed to stop Nightmare Moon without the Elements of Harmony?"

I heard an assortment of hoofsteps behind me, and it was then that I discovered I had been followed in by five more mares. I turned my head to see the group walking in. One of them, who I recognized as the pegasus from before, flew up in Twilight's face in an accusatory manner. "And just what are the Elements of Harmony, huh?" Twilight backed up in surprise. “And how did you know about Nightmare Moon, huh? Are you a spy?”

“Now hold on just a second, please, in the name of logic,” I interrupted, as one of the other mares grabbed the pegasus’s tail in her mouth and pulled her away from Twilight. “Why would she be a spy? Who would she be spying for, exactly, and what would she be trying to find out?” The pegasus stopped, her expression blank. “You didn’t think that question through very well, did you?”

“Hey!” she exclaimed, trying to fly toward me and getting stopped again by the orange earth pony.

“Excuse my manners,” I said. “I’ve just had the equivalent of about fourteen cups of coffee, so my mind is all over the place right now. Point is,” I continued, “she’s not a spy.”

“But she sure knows what’s going on,” the earth pony said. The entire group took a step toward her. “Don’t ya, Twilight?”

“Wait what. You all know each other?” I exclaimed. My mind had ground to a complete halt. They all glanced at me. Twilight was silent for a moment, then took a deep breath.

“I read all about the prediction of Nightmare Moon’s return. Some strange objects called the Elements of Harmony are the only things that can stop her. But I don’t know what they are, or where to find them. I don’t even know what they do!”

I raised my hoof. “I can help with that.” Everypony turned and stared at me.

“Well?” Twilight asked. “What are they?”

I took a breath and entered microlecture mode. “There are six Elements of Harmony, only five of which have been recorded. They are Kindness, Laughter, Generosity, Honesty, and Loyalty. The last known location of the Elements is the ancient castle of the Royal Pony Sisters, which is located in the Everfree Forest.” I felt a slight buzzing in my side courtesy of one of my alarm enchantments, and turned toward the window. Hovering there was a cloud of starry navy blue fog. "Hey, Moonbutt! This monologue is intended for an audience of six, not seven!"

The fog looked as shocked as fog can look, then flew away. “Sorry about that,” I apologized to the group, all of whom looked very confused. “Nightmare Moon decided she wanted to eavesdrop. She knows where we’re going.”

“Which is…?” one of the ponies asked. She was the white unicorn mare I had seen at the town hall.

“The Everfree Forest,” I replied nonchalantly. “I said that already.”

“The Everfree Forest?!” everyone exclaimed dramatically.

“Haven’t I said that, what, twice now?” I asked. “Better get going.” With that, I trotted toward the door. I looked back to see the others standing there, not sure what to do. “Well?” I asked. I waved a hoof at the door. “Come on!” They exchanged a few glances, then followed me out.

Ten minutes later, we found ourselves standing at the edge of the Everfree Forest. Most of us were standing there, wondering what to do next. I was standing there, waiting for them to realize that we were supposed to go into the forest.

“Whee! Let’s go!” the pink one exclaimed.

“Not so fast,” Twilight said. “I appreciate the offer, but, I’d much rather do this on my own.”

“No can do, sugarcube,” the orange one (I really needed to learn their names) interjected. “We sure ain’t lettin’ any friend of ours” -Twilight cringed heavily at that- “go into that creepy place alone. We’re stickin’ to you like caramel on a candy apple,” she added, as they all began to trot into the forest. I followed suit, with only Twilight and the pink one staying behind.

“Especially if there’s candy apples in there!” the pink one exclaimed. “What?” she asked in response to the strange look Twilight gave her. “Those things are good!”

Twilight sighed and followed us, albeit reluctantly. “S-so, none of you have been in here before?” she asked.

“Nope,” I said. “First day in town.” The pink one gasped dramatically, and looked like she was about to sprint all the way back to the town for some reason. The expression somehow completely vanished in half a second, with no trace whatsoever.

“Oh, h-heavens no!” the white unicorn gasped. “Just look at it! It’s simply dreadful!”

“And it ain’t natural,” the orange one (I was really starting to feel guilty for referring to them that way by that point) added. “Folks say it don’t work the same as Equestria.”

“What do you mean?” Twilight asked nervously.

“Nopony knows!” the blue pegasus said in what I assumed was the scariest voice she could muster, which really was not much. “You know why?” she asked, crouching low to the ground and advancing on the rest of the group. “Because nopony that’s ever been inside has ever come out!” She yelled the last word.

And then the cliff collapsed beneath us.

Author's Note

Haha...Oops.