Insanity is a Mere Advantage
By Awesomedude17

I heard a slight beeping sound, and I wondered, 'where am I?' I opened my eyes, and saw a couple of gold-clad horses. My body instinctively tried to move forward, but I willed myself to stop. Considering I was willing 'Trevor Phillips' to not kill anything that pissed him off, that was impressive.

"What the... where the fuck am I?" I asked. If I was in real control, I would've been less blunt.

"You're in the medical bay, you've been out for a few days." One of the guards replied.

"A few days? FUCK ME!!!" As scary as it sounds, I would've said the exact same thing, or rather, my real self, rather than... well.

Makes me wonder, what would I be like if I started doing stuff.

There was the matter of the rampages, I may not have been Canadian, but Trevor is, and he doesn't enjoy it. Matter of fact, it causes rampages, which, while amusing from a player's view, might be a nightmare for an up-close watcher... such as me...

I scoffed and fell back into bed. As much as myself wanted to strangle one of them, I tried not to, for both the fact that it's wouldn't make a good first impression, and also for the fact that it'd probably still traumatize me completely.

I was at a loss, on one hand, I could just let go and give up controlling a guy like Trevor, but then I'd be dead or hated or both. On the other, if I try and control Trevor, do some somewhat 'heroic' actions, but I'd end up having a mental breakdown, and I might end up truly become Trevor Phillips, no Damon or nothing.

It scared me that I was damned if I do, damned if I don't, and dammit, like it or not, someone will die because of me, I just know it.

My train of thought was derailed when I saw two horses, one with a white coat, and another with navy blue coat. I just scowled at the two, in spite of my wishes.

"Now, tell me, who are you?" I remember that voice, and I replied,

"Trevor, Trevor Phillips. Who the fuck are you, asshole?" I mentally facepalmed, unable to control some of the words I say.

"Doth thou realise who thou art talking to?" The blue horse angrily replied.

"How about you answer my question, or I'll rip your fucking horn off and shove it up your cunt!" While 'Trevor' was angry, I was panicking and frightened. I was literally antagonizing the very per... whatever she is into attacking me. If I keep this up, I might be bleeding out with a stab wound, or worse, burned alive, like that ending where...

"YOU DARE..."

"Luna, enough!" The white horse ordered.

"But sister..." Sister. I raised an eyebrow at that fact. I made a mental note, hoping to make use of it later.

"I am sorry about my sister, she's a bit... excitable."

"Excitable... oh, that's rich." I snarked.

"I am Princess Celestia, and this is Luna, we are the rulers of Equestria, the land you are in. Tell me, where do you reside from?"

Considering I already introduced myself as Trevor, I might as well go along with the charade. "Sandy Shores, San Andreas."

"Sandy... Shores? I do not think I've heard of it."

"Yeah, I've never seen talking horses."

"We're ponies, actually."

"Whatever, I don't give a shit." I actually did, but my predicament prevents me from fully doing what I think... I really have become Trevor, didn't I... Oh no...

Whatever nervousness was going on with the true me, it was showing on Trevor.

"Is something wrong?" Celestia asked with worry. Think Damon, think! I got it!

"Withdrawal, need my meth." Worth a try.

"Meth? I do not think I've heard of that."

I suddenly lost control... I think Trevor lost his shit and is running on his gut feeling right now.

"No... m-meth?" I muttered, tone seemingly murderous.

"Tell me, how do you make it, we can administer it to you." I gained some control, but I knew something else.

I had chose to bring Trevor's meth here.

"It's shaped like a crystal, with my stuff. Aagh..." I began to have chills, I really was going into withdrawal, whatever brought me here changed me in the complete form of Trevor, save for a different mental state. Celestia had the guards move to get the brain-killing drug. I truly wished I was at the stupid convention, instead of suffering from meth withdrawal in a hospital bed with small, colorful ponies.

This is officially the worst day of my life, bar none!

Several minutes later, they came in with a pipe, and handed it to me.

"We took a small chunk and put it in this pipe. will this..." I did not even let her finish, I just took the pipe and a lighter, and lit it up. I smoked in the drug, and then I felt something, euphoria. I felt, energized, awake. Alive! Oh God, why am I enjoying this, I am mess now.

"Hehahahaha HAHAHAHAHA!!!" I laughed with gusto, no longer feeling like shit and got out of bed, taking the IV and heart rate monitors off of my body, I moved my sore body, stretching my legs, and looked at the two ponies. I scowled again and walked in, expecting to belittle them or something.

"Thank you." I said, clearly not sincere, but it was enough for the princess.

"Good, lure them into a false sense of security."

"Oh, it's you again. The fuck do you want?"

"You must get to the Crystal Empire."

"You must shut the fuck up, I just got here."

"Do you have a deathwish?"

"I had one more times than you could count!" Technically, that was true, considering that he pissed off the Lost MC, the Aztecas, the FIB, Merriweather and countless other people.

"If you would be so nice to follow me, that'd be great." Celestia said to break my conversation with that voice.

"Fine..." I figured I'd give her a break for bringing me that toxic substance. I found myself walking along, have a bit more control. I figured that if it wasn't the meth keeping myself under control, it was general happiness, which meant that I had to do things to keep myself entertained. I assumed that I thousands upon thousands of rounds of ammunition that I had that voice bring me with the rest of my gear, and if I was correct, so was my Canis Bodhi. If you don't know what it is, think of a Land Rover, paint it red.

I hope it has the upgrades that I had put on it for GTA V. It'd be nigh unstoppable then.

Heh, I guess this isn't all bad, a badass truck, with multiple weapons. I might have to deal with that voice later, but for now, I could enjoy this a little... if I don't lose my shit.

"So, Trevor... I have to admit..."

"What?" I said bluntly.

"I saw you much earlier than you were free from your prison."

"What?" I said in a mix of anger and annoyance. Made me think, how long was I here?

"I assumed that you were a chaotic creation by Discord that was left behind when we turned him to stone..."

"Oh, like me?" I replied sarcastically.

"Unfortunately, we assumed that you were a sculpture, not a living being in stone, and put you in the Canterlot Gardens."

I twisted my mouth for a bit, trying to find the right words.

I found them.

"Where's this Discord bitch? I wanna teach him a few lessons." I punched my fist into my palm. I may not have been thinking clearly, but I, at least, wanted to punch something, whether or not I was myself or Trevor. He probably tore me from my home, that enough warrants an ass-kicking. I don't care if I'm usually kind-hearted, that's not cool.

"You can try." Luna said in a tone that was half sarcastic.

"Try?"

"Discord, plain and simple, is chaos incarnate. Finding him is luck, attempting to perform a fight with him is downright idiotic."

"Maybe I want to be stupid." I snarked.

"Maybe you should dig your grave."

"Maybe I should dig four, one for me, and the rest for you dumbasses."

The guards surrounded me, and I just snarled. I wasn't having this shit.

"Guards, stand down," The guards did as they were told, as a truly loyal patriot would do. I found myself admiring those guards a bit, if only a little. "...and you, watch your tongue."

"Whatever."

"I have a feeling you're going to be difficult to deal with."

"You have no idea." These Sugar Ponies did not need to know that they were with a man who managed to get on a first name basis with the freaking LSPD. If that's shocking, how about the time he hijacked a cargo plane with only a crop duster, or maybe the time tried to steal a nuke from a PMC. I just hope I could keep control long enough to get on their good side... or get away.

We walked for several more minutes. I was nervous, not that I was showing it. If they make one wrong move, BOOM, everyone's dead, I'm running away, on the lamb for all eternity, and possible getting hanged.

Or maybe that voice makes me do things, right before wasting me. And who's to say I'm not gonna get stabbed in the back. I should've thought about all of this more right before breaking out, but dammit, I was strung out, weak and afraid. What was I sup...

"Alright, take a seat, we'll be with you shortly."

Celestia's words got me out of my trance and I found myself in a nicely organized room. I decided to make myself comfortable and sit down on one of the chairs.

All I could say was...

"What... the fuck... is going on? And why am I here? Ahh fuck it." I went to sleep right then and there, I wasn't tired, but I had nothing better to do.

Why didn't I ice that horse?

What was that? Ehh, I must be losing my mind.

Author's Note

Yes, this chapter's disjointed, but come on, we'd all be thinking about all kinds of thing if we were stuck somewhere we didn't know.

Also, what was that random thought?