Warcraft is Magic

Celestia stood in the middle of one of the meeting rooms glaring at Azok and Vinny. “What is wrong with you two.”

        “What?”

        “You just threatened to murder the bride, my niece.  One more threat like that and I will expel you from the city for the remainder of the wedding!”

        “But she’s evil!”

        Celesta stomped her hoof to the ground slightly cracking some of the marble floor “Enough!”

        “Sheesh.. Fine, fine we will behave ourselves.”  The Princess left the room in a huff leaving Azok and Vinny to find there way out of the castle.  They rounded a corner and came face to snout with the Pink Alicorn they have previously intended to kill.  “Well this is odd.”

        “Oh it’s you two. Here to insult me again?”

        “No...now if you'll excuse me we have to find out way out of this damn castle.  By the way, we know you're evil so just drop the act so we can get on with our day.”

        “Stop calling me evil,” the the Alicorn growled.

        “Or what?”

        “This.”

        The last thing our heroes saw was a ring of emerald fire engulf them before dragging them into the floor.

        Azok and Vinny bust through the door flanked by Twilight and the real Princess Cadence; they charged the fake with weapons drawn.  The fake Princess Cadences burst into green flames, her shape changing her pink fur turned into a black carapace and her flowing pink mane became like dingy green moss.

        “You fools think you can stop me?  I'm more powerful than even the princess !I am-” The Changelings words were cut off a beam of light had pierced her chest.  The limp body hung in the air for a second before falling to the ground disappearing in a puff of smoke.

        Suddenly everything froze and slowly faded to black

Michel Smith looked at his computer screen with disgust, for three weeks he had been testing the newest expansion pack for the game World of Warcraft and for three weeks he had barely held in his hatred for it.  But when he one shotted the last boss it was the final straw.

        He shot up from his chair and stomped down the hallway to his boss’s office.  He slammed the door open and began shouting, “I can’t fucking take it anymore! Jesus fucking christ, this is the single worst thing I have ever played and i have played e.T on the atari.”

        “Can you give us an example of what we did that was ‘bad’?”

“I can give you plenty of examples: the writing was terrible, it looks like it was done by a damn 10 year old,  and the new race, jesus shit nobody wants to play as a pony unless you're an overweight child-molesting homosexual.  There were massive plot holes that were never explained.  The ending was shit and i can't even begin to express my hatred towards the npc, god damn they were annoying friendship this and friendship that i'm a fucking man not some little five year old girl!”

“You stole from like nine different people, do you even have the licensing rights to use Dr Who?”

        “I was not aware we needed them?...Can you tell us what you thought of the quest lines?”

“There were no quest lines! It was random shit here and random shit there, and i only got to kill like 9 things! The entire fucking time that fucking griffon thing you made follow me around killed everything i tried to. It was like he was an overpowered npc. One hit and everything would die. His only weakness was if he was hurt he couldn't heal himself for fucks sake.”

        “Actually he was a played character by some guy in south carolina.”

“I will find him. And i will kill him.”

        “I don’t think that’s the best idea.”

“You dont get to fuckign think anymore! All you get to do is hit the big button called ‘delete everything’!

        “But we can't do that without erasing everything you affected...”

“Do it anyways. Nuke the entire game.  Then burn the hard drive.”

        “Is there anything we can to to salvage the game?”

“No no no no no no no, this game is the worst thing ever. I will repeat myself for your sake:  there is no storyline, overpowered characters, and bullshit graphics.  I mean seriously, what the fuck is up with the technicolor? It’s too fucking bright, too.”

        “Well we thought it would be nice contrast to our last expansion.”

“You thought wrong mother fucker.  The only good part of the game was the tournament and the part where i got to murder the living hell out of the guards at the capital city!”

“And then that part where you put a new continent in half way and didn't even let us play that! Why the fuck did you do this shit dude that one looked fun?”

        “Well we're still proud of the ending of the last boss.”

“How the flying jesus fuck can you be proud of that? I one shotted her with the weakest spell i had and the part before where we got sucked up by green flames, it just skipped what happened after that and went right to the boss!”

        “Oh god we forgot to write that part of the code in, sorry.”

“How do you forget to write in code for the game you're developing?”

        “Well it’s easy, it happens all the time we can just put it in before the launch.”

“Thats it i fucking quit! Peace out, fuckers.”

EXTENDED CUT

        Michel stood in front of the house of the other game tester, the one who controlled Badger.  Revenge was the only thing on his mind, walking up to the front door his hand drifted to his pocket and fumbled with his brass knuckles.

        “Ya?”

        “GOD FUCKING DAMNIT!”

        And the moral of the story is you can't hit a kid in a wheelchair.

(A/N yes this is the real ending. Yes I was planning this from the start. *evil laughter*)