Wub Is An Open Door

The prismatic neon lights strobed overhead, heavy bass vibrating deep in her bones and gut. It was the feeling Vinyl Scratch lived for. The ponies in the club danced as the white unicorn’s magic rolled over the keys of her synthesizer while she worked beats and effects with her hooves, “I’m the D to the J to the P-O-N-3, and ain’t no other pony drops the bass like me, I’m Vinylicious” she half-sung into a microphone.

And there ‘she’ was. The beautiful mare that never missed one of Vinyl’s shows; her biggest fan, and though never danced, she always sat near the stage, closed her eyes and enjoyed the wubs. The frequenters of this club, the Moon’s Lament, were used to seeing the alicorn, but she kept herself to herself, and occasionally had a few drinks. She was Princess Luna.

The white unicorn mare, with a messy electric-blue mane which spoke of a thousand parties, and an grin which promised a thousand more, played away, gazing at the princess from behind purple-tinted shades. Song after song as the night wore on and the ponies in the club began to tire, the beautiful princess didn’t move from her spot until dawn approached. At which point, Vinyl always knew it was time to call it a night and wind things down a bit.

Today, however, she wound down early to a few complaints, but greeted her excited groupies and fans as she exited the stage.

“Um, DJ Pon-3, I got you a gift,” a magenta-maned earth pony mumbled, passing a paper bag to Vinyl and blushing furiously.

“Oh, thanks Treble Clef. You didn’t have to.”

“I- you- you remember my name,” Treble Clef squealed happily, before staring at her hooves, “It was your birthday the other day, right? And that mare you were with broke up with you a few weeks ago so…” she trailed off.

“Of course I remember your name,“ Vinyl grinned, “You’re at like, all my shows.”

Treble Clef stood staring, making the incoherent noises only heard from the mouths of fangirls, and the artist DJ Pon-3 pushed through the crowd, away towards the bar. It was the pony Vinyl Scratch, leaving behind her stage persona, who ordered a martini.

“Another good one, Scratch,” the stallion behind the bar, Mixing Glass, said, “DJ Pon-3 is a name I’m hearing more and more in the electronic music world, probably ain’t long before you gotta play somewhere else,” he told her, “Your gigs are getting too many ponies to fit in here.”

“Yeah, it’s pretty cool,” Vinyl nodded, and turned away dismissively, levitating the drink next to her in a glow of blue magic. She wasn’t really in a sociable mood, and Treble Clef just had to remind her of Octavia on tonight of all nights, when she was going to chat to another mare.

A twang of guilt surged through her as she worried about what Tavi would think. It felt like cheating, and though they weren’t together any more, and hadn’t been for a couple of weeks or so now. Got to move on, right? And it’s not like she was looking for another marefriend, and with a princess? Come on, as if she’d be interested in a boring old unicorn like Vinyl Scratch!

Taking a deep breath, she walked nonchalantly over to the alicorn princess sat near the stage, her starry mane blowing ethereally in some unfelt breeze. Most ignored her, and though a few stared, she never met their gaze. The odd pony who approached her, she treated with kindness, and despite the fact that most ponies had gotten over the fact that she was not Nightmare Moon any more, and even though Luna had modernised her speech, ponies still often walked away feeling confused, intimidated and slightly offended.

“Hey,” Vinyl Scratch said coolly, or so she hoped. You doofus. You sounded like a total mule there. Agh! She mentally berated herself.

“Hello,” Luna bowed her head as Vinyl put down the martini on the table in front of her, and slid into the booth opposite the princess.

“I got you a martini,” Vinyl gestured to it with a sheepish grin.

“I think you mean a martinus,” Luna replied sharply, fixing the unicorn with a piercing gaze.

“Uh. I’m sorry?”

“It was a joke. Was that not obvious?” Luna asked, her voice softening in worry, “Do you not get it? Did I do it wrong?”

“Oh. You didn’t do anything wrong, but I guess I don’t get it?” Vinyl scratched her head, “I’m not a smart pony.”

“I see. My skill of spotting social cues leaves something to be desired, I believe,” Luna confided, and straightened up, “Thank you, Vinyl Scratch. How may I help you?”

“I just came to thank you for coming to my shows,” Vinyl smiled softly. It had been a good year or two since Nightmare Moon had been defeated by the elements of harmony, and Princess Luna returned to her old self, but she didn’t seem to be much better at learning how to speak to ponies. Maybe she was too out of touch, or something else. No matter anyway, Vinyl thought to herself, Some ponies are just like that.

“You’re most welcome, DJ Pon-3” the princess smiled a beautiful smile, the kind of smile which would melt the heart of a lesser mare. As a filly, and even now, Vinyl loved watch the stars and moon for hours, lost in their beauty, and that feeling was akin to watching Princess Luna smile at her.

Pushing another twinge of guilt aside, “Would you like to hang out sometime?”

“Hang? From where?” Luna frowned, withdrawing slightly “Are you threatening me?”

“What? No! Like, spend time together,” babbled the unicorn, “Y’know, watch a movie or something?”

“That sounds most pleasant. It would be fun.” The alicorn nodded, visibly relaxing, “But for now, I must go to work, so I shall take my leave of you.”

“Work?” asked Vinyl stupidly, already knowing the answer.

“I am the princess of the night. It is my duty to raise and lower the moon, and care for any ponies that experience troubled dreams,” she explained, using her magic to levitate a hooded indigo cloak around herself.

“That sounds way harder than DJing,” Vinyl admitted, “Isn’t it heavy? The moon?”

Princess Luna shook her head, “No, but I do work so very hard to arrange the stars into a beautiful array.”

“Woah,” whispered Vinyl, “And you waste your time watching my performances?”

Princess Luna stood, shaking her cloak out, “On the contrary, it is your music and company which staves off the loneliness this evening, where no others appreciate my night but for once per year. You are inspirational.”

Vinyl Scratch, upcoming professional DJ, stared open-mouthed at princess of the night, “My work? Inspirational? I’m honestly touched, your majesty.”

“Touched? I did not touch you,” Luna’s brow furrowed in concern.

“It’s an expression. I feel honoured, is what I meant,” Vinyl paused, "And for the record, I like the night."

“I find that the bass of your music helps me think. The, what do you call it," she pondered, "wubs?"

Vinyl nodded in confirmation, "Wubs"

"Thank you for coming to speak to me,” smiled Luna as she turned to leave, her horn glowing “Farewell.”

And like that, she was gone in a flash of teleportation. Vinyl knew hundreds of ponies, but there had only ever been one she’d ever written a song for, and that was Octavia. Until that song, her music had been only for herself. It kept her sane, helped her feel, and it was who she was. Sharing that with another pony had been a deeply personal experience, but now she was going to extend the same courtesy to the princess. She was going to write a song in honour of Princess Luna. But first, she was going to drink Princess Luna's abandoned martini.

* * *

Tap tap tap.

It was crazy. When she was up on that stage, bathed in light, spinning records all night long and sharing her soul with everypony in the crowd, everything was okay. She felt whole, like nothing could stop her, and it was her dream to make a living from her music, and it was definitely getting there. Sure, the neighbours kept complaining about her playing back at the apartment, but that couldn’t be helped. She was living in a smallish town after all.

Tap tap tap.

For now, however, it was morning. Well, afternoon technically. Sunlight streamed through a window and onto the sleeping face of Vinyl Scratch, who was sprawled out in her bed, only half under the covers, snoring, open-mouthed and drooling disgustingly. The sky was clear today, giving the illusion of warmth in late September.

Bang bang bang.

“Ms. Scratch! I know you’re in there. Wake up!” shouted the voice of a mare through Vinyl’s apartment door. The landmare. Vinyl let out sigh of resignation, groaned and reluctantly rubbed her eyes open, staring bleary-eyed at her DJ equipment opposite her bed. It was quite a good set up, and a lot of bits had gone into it.

“Vinyl Scratch!” The landmare banged again.

“Who is it?” Vinyl groaned as she stood, knowing the answer already, but buying herself another precious few seconds to compose herself. She swayed a little as she looked at the door. Her head hurt. I shouldn’t have had another six martinis last night after Luna left, she thought to herself, This is what I get for being a lonely screw up

“Sparkle Rain,” said her landmare, “And well you know it. Open up. I need to talk to you.”

Magically picking up her signature purple sunglasses and sliding them onto her muzzle, she made for the door, slipped on a dirty plate she’d left on the floor, and fell with a crash.

“Goodness me, Ms. Scratch! Your mane,” Sparkle Rain stared when Vinyl finally opened the door, “I’m pretty sure it’s defying gravity to some extent…”

Vinyl shrugged, not caring, “What’s up?”

“Your rent is overdue. This is unacceptable,” The purple-maned earth pony said, “This happens every month.  Do you have it now?”

Scratching her head, Vinyl sucked in air through her teeth, “Ah, yeah, about that…” she trailed off. She was picking up her pay from the gig last night later today, and Sparkle Rain was a busy mare, what with starting up her new drinks company. She’d made a drink she was calling Sparkle Cola, which was delicious, and she’d recently purchased a factory in Manehatten, and it was really going places.

Sparkle Rain placed a hoof at Vinyl’s shoulder, her stern expression softening, “I’m sorry Vinyl, I can’t keep letting you off like this.”

“But-“ Vinyl began.

“I’ll give you until 8 o’clock this evening. Either be out of here by then, or have the bits.”

Vinyl nodded, “I can do that.” She hoped, anyway. Things would be a little tight for a while, and she might have to skip a few meals, but she could do it.

Half an hour later, Vinyl was resigned to doing a little housework. The floor and surfaces were littered with plates, wrappers, and mugs of coffee which had long been forgotten and may, in fact, be close to inventing the wheel. The only immaculate part of this cramped apartment was the area immediately surrounding her set up. After all, she couldn’t work properly if she couldn’t move to fiddle with dials and play keys on her magical synthesizer.

It was a good thing she hadn’t spent much time here with Octavia. She would have had an absolute breakdown at the mess, so they’d usually gone to hers to save drama. Another stab of loneliness and regret shot through Vinyl’s heart and she faltered while washing a plate and dropped it.

“I miss you,” Vinyl whispered aloud, though she was alone. She was stupid. She’d been too focused on her work and music to pay attention to Tavi. She’d missed too many of her performances and now, she was alone.

Levitating her mobile phone in front of her, she magically tapped out a message to Octavia, WANNA MEET UP FOR LUNCH SOMETIME? Sent.

“Calm down, Vinyl,” she told herself, “It’s just lunch,” and come to think of it, of course she missed Octavia, but would she really want to be back in a relationship with her? Vinyl loved her, but to be honest she was high maintenance and didn’t really fit well with her lifestyle and-

“Why does everything have to be so confusing and hard?” she wondered aloud, cutting off that train of thought before it got carried away. Maybe it was for the best. She wasn’t very smart, and she knew it, so she didn’t often try to understand things. She just left that to the more intelligent ponies like Princess Twilight, and Neon Lights. She didn’t understand things like magical theory, interior decorating, or flying. Let things be. Don’t gotta understand everything.

* * *

“Here’s your bits from last night,” Mixing Glass was saying, for he was the owner of the Moon’s Lament, as well as the bartender, “You pulled a really big crowd. A hundred and ten bits”

Phew. At least that’ll cover the rent owed, along with what Vinyl had put aside, if nothing else. She had another gig on Thursday, and that would do her just fine. Things were really looking up now. She even had a hoofful of dedicated fans!

Realistically, however, she was probably going to have to move soon. She was hoping to move back to Manehatten, where she’d studied Music Theory at University and met Octavia, and at least she had friends and connections there. She’d been one of the most popular music acts among students in Manehatten for a while, but had never gotten herself a record label.

“One day I’ll go pro,” she said aloud, earning her a grin from Glass.

“No doubt,” he confirmed, “You got talent, Scratch, and the princess is a fan of yours.”

Vinyl blushed and pawed at the ground with her hoof, a rare display of shyness, “I- I don’t think I’m good enough, but I keep trying to get better.”

Mixing Glass raised an eyebrow, “You like her, don’t you?” he grinned, “I don’t think her stable door swings that way. Come to think of it, I don’t think it swings any way.”

“Are you sure?” asked Vinyl, internally cursing her eagerness, “I mean. That must be lonely, right?”

“Dunno,” Mixing Glass shrugged, “Let Princesses be Princesses. As long as she pays, I don’t much care.”

“Well, I’ll see you Thursday. Laters,” she gave a single half-hearted wave, and departed.

* * *

Thursday came, and late into the night, DJ Pon-3 played her wubs, and drank heavily as she stared out into the crowd. It wasn’t just the usual clubbers out there; they were all fans, and she was the only act on today. Ticket admission was more bits than the usual, and ponies were packed into the room tighter than sardines in a can, and as always, that midnight blue alicorn sat watching, waiting for her. They were turning ponies away at the door, because it would be hazardous to allow any more in. Plenty of bits too, she thought in the back of her mind.

But Vinyl wasn’t really paying attention to any of that. She focused on her music, while drinking not because of the crowd, but because she was planning to talk to the princess.

“This is the last one, guys,” Vinyl announced, “And I wrote it for a special mare in the audience today. I only came up with it the other day, so let me know what you think,” she paused while ponies in the crowd looked at each other, “It’s called Princess Of The Night.”

She launched into her new song, throwing in some softer piano work in with the electronic beats, a new one for her. Somepony had once told her that her music sounded like two robot ponies going at it, and she wasn’t sure if that was a compliment or an insult, but she took it in her stride anyway.

The room was a spinning a little, and it was a good thing that Vinyl was seated, else she might have stumbled and messed up the song. The strobing lights were disorientating, but all the same she risked a glance out into the crowd and saw Princess Luna, staring open-mouthed at Vinyl, so she quickly looked away and took yet another swig from her bottle of Wild Pegasus whiskey.

Think of something else, Vinyl, she thought to herself, Octavia still hasn’t replied… No! Not that either. Eugh. I suck.

Finishing up her song, with a crackle of magical pyrotechnics from the ponies operating the stage lighting, the crowd burst into applause, stomping their hooves in approval.

“You’ve been a great crowd!” Vinyl called out to yet more applause as she magically picked up her bottle of whiskey and headed backstage, tipsy.

There stood a male white pegasus in a business suit with a silver-coloured record as a cutie mark, “Excuse me, DJ Pon-3?”

“Yo,” Vinyl acknowledged, trying to straighten up, “What’s up?”

“My name is Platinum, a representative of Goldenblood Records. You put on a phenomenal show tonight, and it is truly commendable.”

“Goldenblood Records? As in, the big record company?”

“The very same,” responded Platinum coolly, “Are you free for a talk? We have an offer to make you,”

She wasn’t. She knew she wasn’t, because she was going to talk to the princess, but she couldn’t turn this guy down. This was her dream. Her big chance, so she nodded, “Sure.”

“There’s a table here,” the pegasus gestured and took a seat, so Vinyl followed suit, “We were made aware of your music by Princess Luna, and I am very pleased to say that she did not disappoint.”

“P-princess Luna told you about me?” Vinyl stammered, desperately willing herself to sober up enough that the room would stop spinning and she could hold a decent conversation.

“She’s so nice,” she said dumbly.

“You seem to be a bit inebriated presently, but we wish to offer you a contract. Your music would be sold on records all across Equestria, giving you a cut of the profits,” Platinum explained.

“I- Wow. Yeah. That sounds good.”

“Excellent. Shall we meet for lunch tomorrow at Sugarcube Corner to go over the contract? Perhaps midday?”

“That sounds good,” Vinyl said again, dreading her future hangover and , and Platinum stood to leave, “Thank you,” she blurted, remembering her manners.

Once Platinum was gone, Vinyl slumped in her chair, taking a long slug of whiskey, relishing the burn and sweet aftertaste. She was on the verge of going pro, and she’d left the princess waiting. What if Luna had gone already? She was a busy pony, after all.

Vinyl stood, and staggered, and fell over. Odd. She didn’t feel that drunk, but she sometimes felt that she got drunk from the legs up, and it must not have registered in her brain yet. Regardless, she made her way out into the crowd, and was greeted by a mob of fans, a few asking for her autograph. She signed a couple absent-mindedly, and announced to them that she’d rather be left alone, and they reluctantly left.

She made her way over to the usual spot by the stage, and to her relief, Luna was there, “Hey cutie,” Vinyl called as she approached, slurring a little. Wait, did she really just say that?

"I'm not cute," sulked Luna, pawing at the table with a forehoof, "I am the night," she pouted, all majesty gone from her tone and appearance, instead appearing more foalish that would be expected.

"With all due respect, Princess, you may be the night, but you're a pretty damn cute mare," Vinyl grinned, leaning forward and offering her the bottle of whiskey.

“No thank you,” Luna pushed the bottle away, “I do not imbibe.”

“Imbibe?” Vinyl asked, “Wuzzat mean?”

“Drink alcohol”

“Oh,” she paused, “I still think you’re cute anyway.”

Luna blushed, “I ask of you, call me Luna.”

“Luna,” Vinyl began, “is a beautiful name. It sums up all you are, in a single word. And you are more than the night. You are wonderful mare, too,” she slurred, sitting next to the alicorn and leaning into her, grinning like an idiot.

“Thank you, Vinyl Scratch,” Luna nodded a little uncomfortably, “You seem to be leaning on me.”

“I got a question, Luna, if you’d answer. And you can just call me Vinyl.”

“Hmm,” she said, looking into what would be Vinyl’s eyes, if she weren’t wearing glasses, “I do too.”

“I’ll answer your question if you’ll answer mine,” The DJ paused, and giggled, straightening up, “Heh. I don’t have a mine. Boom!”

“Pray tell, what colour are your eyes, Vinyl Scratch?” Luna asked, with an inquisitive head tilt. Luna seemed completely different to the other day. Perhaps she was more relaxed, or maybe Vinyl was just drunk. It was hard to tell.

“Uh, let’s not go there,” Vinyl responded, as diplomatically as she could, which wasn't very, “I don’t like my eyes. They’re weird as hay.”

Luna frowned, "Hay is not queer,"

"I mean, they're pretty weird," Vinyl tried to pat Luna on the head, missed, and patted her face a few times, "You'll get the hang of this social thing."

“Everypony is weird. That is what makes us unique, is it not?” Luna smiled, and paused, "That's what Celestia always says."

“I guess,” Vinyl scratched her head, “So where do you go during the day? Do you sleep?”

“Sometimes, but it’s always night somewhere.”

They talked for an hour or so, discussing everything from what it’s like to be the princess of the night (lonely, apparently), to what kind of flower tastes best on a sandwich, to discussing that Luna's recent visit to see her sister, but eventually, duty called and Princess Luna had to leave.

“Goodnight, your majesty,” Vinyl bowed, and would have toppled forward, had Luna not caught her, “Is been good talk to you. Hurray!”

“I suggest you sleep, Vinyl Scratch, and drink plenty of water,” Luna told her, “I shall return for your next performance, wherever it may be.”

Vinyl caught a taxi back home, and briefly marvelled at how Ponyville had grown in the last couple of years since the six ponies who wielded the Elements of Harmony were here, and Princess Twilight Sparkle lived here, Ponyville had become a much more desirable place to live. More so now, as it was an easy commute to Canterlot.

She opened her apartment door, glared disapprovingly at the mess she’d left on the floor, and staggered to her bed, falling face first onto her pillow. She didn’t bother to get under the covers, but instead fell asleep within a few seconds, splayed face down on her bed.

I think I forgot to lock my apartment door, she thought to herself, before succumbing to the enveloping abyss of the dreamless sleep of the drunk.