Chapters Out With The Old and In With The New
Chapter I: A Strange Night
Pain. Deep, throbbing pain. Unlike anything I have ever felt before, and that was saying a lot. If I had colors to describe this pain, it would be an explosion of all of them, because it was absolutely crazy! Due to this extreme pain, I dared not move even the slightest bit, for fear that I would only make it worse. I dared not compare this pain to any other pains in my hardened life for fear of bringing up poignant memories.
After about an hour of just lying down and trying to think of how I ended up in this situation, I found the courage to move my left leg. I tried straightening it to see if there was any pain. Thankfully there was not. I summoned up even more courage and tried raising the limb up into the air, but I could not feel anything. Then something hit me: my leg was absolutely numb and I could not fell a blasted thing! So I tried the other leg. I dragged it along the ground, unknown of how rough the ground was, and actually felt a little bit of dragging. My skin being tugged between friction, and the direction of movement of of my leg left both a felling of relief and dread. The ground felt like dirt, which only meant that something bad must have happened, because I have amnesia.
Either I lost my left leg, slept on it too long, or I have a serious medical condition. If I had lost it, then I would no longer have any joy to my life! All of those nights of dressing up in a black morph suit and climbing old abandoned schools to get that immense feeling of satisfaction and practice being stealthy would be gone! I could always get a prosthetic leg, but it would never be as durable or reliable in the future. I absolutely dread sitting in a wheelchair for the rest of my life due to the fear of living a shorter life and acquiring varicose veins. I shuddered at the thought of varicose veins...I remember seeing a teacher with those running up the entire length of her leg! That was absolutely ugly and fucking disgusting!
I summoned up my left arm, which turned out to be tucked in between my legs. It felt a little sprained, but was for the most part fine. I lifted it with whatever energy I had left and moved it over to where my left leg was. That was when I felt a huge wave of relief wash over me, for I could feel it in all of its glory. My foot could be gone for all I knew because I could not feel it, but the leg was the only important part.
Just then I noticed that I had my eyes 9/10 of the way closed, so I could only see a mild golden glow through the crack. Could I be in heaven? Highly unlikely considering what things I have done in my life, not that I felt bad about it, I could actually care less. I slowly widened my eye lids and was greeted to an even more intense glow. 7/10 open, 6/10 open, 5/10, and so on.
Once my eyes were open (As open as I could bring them anyway), all I saw was a dim golden light. The light started to dim as my eyes adjusted and I started taking in new views. I observed once white clouds slowly sailing across an orange and yellow sky. The clouds were now more of an orange, due to the sun's color. I proposed that it was sunset, and the many parts of my mind came to a consensus agreeing with my hypothesis.
I started to move the fingers on my right hand, using my thumb to caress the fat and muscle folds protruding out of the bottom of my flexing fingers. What a great feeling that was! So great that I lifted my left arm and used those fingers to pinch those little pouches of flesh. It was mostly fat, as it provided a cushion for my hands whenever I picked something up. Thanks evolution. I then tried feeling my stomach with my right hand, and found it to be nice and flat. It had some fat, but not so much as too go crazy about my weight over it. I only weighed 140 pounds after all.
I tried turning my head to left, only to be greeted by a strong discomforting pain running down the length of my neck on the opposite side. I returned my head to its supine state as fast as a bullet getting shot out of a pistol, and winced in pain. I opened my eyes again to be greeted by a cluster of flashing multicolored stars blowing around sporadically without a care in the world. I rarely got those, so it only tells me that something must be seriously wrong with my neck. I wondered if I should try bending my neck to look at my stomach. I slowly moved my ten pound head forward to look, and met no pain as my eyes observed by shirtless stomach.
My stomach must have used to have a shirt, but the whole thing was torn off somehow. Now I was left completely shirtless, and judging how quickly the sun is going down, it was going to be a rough night. The mere sight of my stomach reminded me of how hungry I was! It was that kind of hunger that made your stomach feel like it was going to implode on itself due to the lack of food keeping it in shape. I knew that I was getting nowhere by just lying down here, so I have to try and get up.
In one swift, audacious movement, I lurched by whole torso up. I felt no pain besides the hunger pain in my stomach and the mild pain in my neck warning me not to move my head to much. Through many years of experience with pain, I learned that you could help it go away just by making it hurt. It sounds weird, but it works! I slowly turned my head left again until I reached that point of pain. Once I started feeling the pain shooting down the right side of my neck again, I tightened my jaw in a futile attempt to ease the pain. I held there regardless of the pain, and my vision was completely scrambled by those stars again. I just sat there, waiting, praying for the pain to stop! It felt like molten iron was being porn through a hole in my neck, and that I could feel it slowly drizzling down into my chest. It also felt kind of good. Eventually, the pain stopped with some kind of a strange pop, and everything felt normal again. I saw the stars disappear and my vision cleared up.
I started noticing tears starting to pool in my eyes, so I wiped my eyes clean. I always knew that pain was just weakness leaving the body, and that I would be stronger from this little experience, no matter how unpleasant it was. Now that I could turn my head without restrictions, I noticed that I was in a strange crater, about 25 feet in diameter, with trees popping up all around it. I have seen thick forests where the trees were so packed together that you had to kind of climb around the gaps in between them. It was a tad bit scary I'll admit due to the creeping suspicion that I was going to be slowly crushed by them had they decided to come alive and gang up on me. But thankfully these trees had much more space in between. I looked up and I noticed that the golden glow that I saw earlier was slowly disappearing, and being replaced by stars and slight blackness.
I decided to gaze downward at my body, and was relieved to see that my foot was still there( and pants thankfully), but my leg was still numb, so I decided to lift it up and stretch the hamstring. 'Make sure you stretch out those creamy hamstrings!' I thought to myself with a smile slowly starting to form. I needed a good smile ever since I woke up with amnesia and a broken up body. Where was the excruciating pain I felt when I first woke up? gone, hopefully! I then looked around and started to take in the size and shape of the crater. I saw lumps of colorful clothes just lying about throughout the crater. I noticed that arms and legs were jutting out of those lumps. I finally realized that I wasn't alone in this crater.
I closely observed the five other people lying around this crater. They all wore regular clothes such as kakis or jeans with a t-shirt or long-sleeved. There was just one in particular who wore the strangest clothes that I had ever seen in my life. It appeared to be a twenty-five year old male Caucasian that had a hat with a unicorn horn poking out of the top. He also wore a jacket that was completely white with a hoodie that had large blue sapphire eyes on the top. The eyes looked very feminine, so I could only assume that this "man" was gay. I know that I should not jump to conclusions, but what else could he be? So I'll just stick to the gay hypothesis for now. Most of these people seemed to be in shape, but one looked quite obese. Just looking at him maimed my vision with disgust! My body quivered just thinking about how hard life would be if I weighed that much. I encountered obese people quite frequently due to me living in the Americas, and let me tell you, the Americas were filled with fat people due to how pampered they were. I was born there, but I did not want to run in with that kind of a crowd I tell you what!
I noticed that my left leg had regained its feeling, and was now ready to serve me in walking. I reached both of my arms forward, placed them on the ground, and slowly started to extend my legs until I reached a rape able position with my butt in the air. I berated myself for the dirty thoughts, and pushed my arms off of the ground so that I could stand up with a straight vertebrae. The blood from my legs rushed to my head and almost made me all over again, so I fought it by spreading my legs to become more balanced. It was a truly weird feeling that made your mind go absolutely crazy. Once my mind cleared up, I took in more surroundings and found out that I was slightly taller than the rim of the crater. I was only 5'7, so the rim appeared to be 5'6. I was never satisfied with my height because everyone else seemed to be taller than me. I even tried all kinds of vitamins and supplements to help me grow, but it was to no avail. I wanted to try Human Growth Hormone injections, but they were so goddamn expensive. Why the fuck do they cost so much goddamn it?! Those greedy ass doctors always want your goddamn money!
I stopped my internal rambling and looked up at the sky. I could tell that the sun was barely poking up over the horizon now due to how dark the sky was getting. I thought about building a fire pit quickly before the night's cold started, or all of those people and I would freeze to death, but then I realized that I should probably check to see that we're not in a park first so that I wouldn't just be wasting my time. I looked at the ground again and noticed that there was a pool of blood that was slowly seeping into the dirt, the exact same spot that I was lying on. I reached my hands back to feel my back and was greeted by a meaty pain. It felt so tender and lacerated that I decided that I should probably stay off my back for awhile and let it heal.
I walked to the edge of the huge 20 foot crater and jumped up a bit so I could lock my elbows and pull myself up. The small but sharp pebbles lining the edge of the crater put marks in my palms and stuck there, so I rubbed my hands together to be rid of the little things and started exploring around the crater site. I walked through a forest, noticing a bunch of forest animals running about such as white rabbits and chipmunks. White rabbits? perhaps this was a park with a bunch of feeder rabbits running around to feed predators. I kept walking until I reached a clearing in this strange forest. The grass was very green and rolling everywhere. It was completely dark now, but the moon was quite bright and full, so it made everything glow, especially the grass. I noticed a small pond nearby, but dared not to drink from it for fear of getting a parasite. The last thing I needed was to get a parasite because those shit-eating doctors would probably bill me something that was equal to Bill Gate's salary.
I decided that we're probably not in a park, so I started to look for any dead wood so that I could fuel my future campfire. I walked back into the forest and looked for any dead trees lying on the ground, or even some small twigs. Hell, anything would be good right about now. I started to talk to myself aloud. "Look at this crap! I can't find a damn thing! Hmmmm.". That was a small habit that I paid no attention to because I thought that it was pretty funny, since I always expressed my inner frustration. I looked up at the trees leaves and noticed many small rodents observing me like I was some kind of scary alien. "What are you looking at you ugly mammals?" I said aloud. The chipmunks did nothing else, and I decided to just head back to the camp.
As I was walking, I started to think about how much I hated mammals. Most mammals are such ugly creatures and don't deserve to exist. I only tolerate them because they feed many other more superior animals such as hawks or snakes. Mammals have the dirtiest mating that I can recall, it is so absolutely disgusting that it makes me want to just run up to them and skin them alive. I remember how dogs always get stuck to each other when they mate, which is a nasty thing. I hate mammals as much as the Taliban hate the U.S. government! I also hate how female mammals bleed, it's just so nasty. "Heh, yah I'll make you bleed you unworthy abominations." I muttered to myself.
After a while of walking, I was back at the crater. I had not realized how far I walked away from here! It took around twenty minutes to get back at even a reasonable pace. When I looked back into the crater I noticed that one of those people that I saw sleeping earlier were awake. It was not the fat one thankfully, just a normal looking guy. He stood up when he heard me reach the edge of the crater. That was when I realized that he was an absolute mountain of a man! He was about 6'8. His height made me so jealous. He had dark curly hair, and large lips. He wore a thin checkered polo shirt with buttons. I decided to walk into the crater because he seemed friendly enough to approach. I was always a bit shy when it came to meeting new people, but now was not the time to act like a bitch.
"Salutations." I say aloud with a confident tone.
"Hello," he says with s surprisingly high pitched voice. "Um, do you happen to know where we are?" he asks looking around at the other people still unconscious and the trees surrounding the crater.
"Your guess is as good as mine. I woke up right there." I said pointing to the pile of blood.
"Wow, is that you're blood?! What happened?" he asked with obvious concern.
"Yes, it's mine. I have no idea what happened! I just woke up there and was in extreme pain. Next thing I know I have a wounded back." I say.
"Here let me see." He orders. I turn around and show him my wounded back. I hear him breathe in heavily and breathe out heavily as a huge sigh. "It looks pretty bad." he says sympathetically.
"I kind of figured" I said pessimistically. "But don't worry about it. I feel absolutely spiffy otherwise. I don't think that we properly met, so I'm Alexius. And no, that's not a girl's name."
"That's an interesting name. My name is Mylan." responds the rather large man. "I have no idea what I was doing before I got here, so I can only guess that I have amnesia." he says with sorrow.
"Same here friend." I say. "How old are you if you don't mind me asking?"
"I'm seventeen and half, you?"
I am astounded by how young he is, but how tall he is!, "I'm just 16".
Before we can continue our pleasant conversation, both Mylan and myself notice one of the unconscious bodies start to stir, and then he shrieks in pain after he started to twist his back. It was a loud scream that made my ears ring. We both ran over to him to try and calm him down before he stressed himself out too much. "Here, help me flip him onto his stomach!" I order to Mylan. Not to my surprise, Mylan is quite strong and gets the stranger onto his stomach within 3 seconds.
"AH! What's going on!? Where am I!?" demanded the stranger frantically.
"Shhhhh, it's okay, we don't know where we are, but I assure you that we will find out." I say in a mellow tone trying to calm him down. To my relief, he relaxed at my voice.
"Uh, could you maybe help me stand up?" he asked
"Sure friend" I replied before gesturing to Mylan to help my lift him up without touching his back. Mylan was all too happy to help and lifted him up like he weighed almost nothing. Mylan slowly lowered him onto his feet and gave a nice beaming smile to the stranger who was just as astounded by Mylan's height as I was. This stranger had dyed his hair mint green with white highlights running though it. Strange. He bore a big nose on his face and had hazel eyes. He wore a gray muscle shirt and a pair of jeans. He has some muscles and lookes quite fit, so he's deserving of a muscle shirt.
"So where are we!?" demanded the stranger.
"I don't know! I just woke up in the forest here in this crater only to be greeted to a lot of pain. I decided to go look for civilization and firewood before it got too cold, and when I came back I found Mylan here awake. I think we should build that fire as quickly as possible, because the nights can get very cold out here in the forest. That and it'll help to keep predators away if there are any." I explain.
"I'll go get some firewood for you guys." offered Mylan
I was absolutely appalled by his generosity. "Why thank you Mylan. You sure are generous aren't you?"
"You know it buddy." he says.
"Just be careful okay? It's quite inky out there." I said. Mylan took a moment to think about what 'inky' meant before realizing that it meant dark. He nodded in confirmation before crawling out of the crater and disappearing into the dark forest. I look back over to the newly awakened person. "So what's your name? I'm Alexius."
"I'm Tyler, nice to meet you. So what in the hell do you think is going on?" asks Tyler.
"Weird shit if anything. All of us ending up in a crater with no memory of how we got there. That is pretty Twilight Zone to me friend." I say. "Mind if I see your back? Mine hurt too and it's pretty mangled. I was wondering if yours is the same.
"Knock yourself out." says Tyler before turning around and lifting up his shirt. Yeah a shirt would be pretty nice about now. I noticed that his back was not tender like mine, it instead had uncountable gashes like he was whipped repeatedly.
"Wow! You look like you were whipped something fierce friend! There's so many gashes on your back it looks like a lion got a hold of you!" I say.
"I'd rather not hear a description of it thank you very much sir." He says looking sick.
"At least you have a shirt to cover it up, I woke up half naked." I say.
Both Tyler and I hear a scuffing sound somewhere else in the crater before we could continue. When we looked over, two more strangers had awakened from their slumber and were now starting to slowly stand up and look around in confusion. I waited for one of them to holler out in pain from getting injured, but they both seemed fine as they started stumbling around in the dark. The fat one was one of the ones to awaken. "Hello!? Where am I?" wailed the fat one. He had a high pitched voice and had blonde hair that was formed into bangs hanging down either side of his head. He had a baby face with big puffy red cheeks and two front teeth sticking out that were a little bit more than noticeable. He looked a little bit funny I thought to myself.
The other stranger who had just awoken started to holler out as well. The fat one was completely oblivious and nearly had a heart attack at the sound of the other stranger's yelling. "Oh shit! Who's there!?" Yelled the fat one.
"I'm Daniel! Tommy, is that you pranking me? If it is then I'll have your bony hide!" Yelled the other stranger.
"Hey stop!" I yell to stop them from freaking out any further. I then run over to them to explain everything that has happened. "This may be a little bit hard to explain, but you are lost in the middle of some forest like us. So yeah."
"What do you mean we're lost in the middle of the forest!?" screamed Daniel. Daniel appeared to be quite short, around 5 feet tall. He was wearing a black t-shirt with the ACDC logo on it and also bore blonde hair.
"We all woke up in this crater in the middle of some forest! I already went out to look!" I responded.
"Yeah right," said the fat one. "I bet this is all just some kind of stupid prank, well it's not gonna work on me! I bet that you dropped me in some city park."
"I assure you that this is not a prank. I already checked to see if it was a prank and the forest went on forever. I did not see another human in sight!" I say.
"Yeah right, I'll go find my own way out liar!" says the fat one before he goes crawling up the side of the crater to leave rather slowly due to his health.
"I don't know what to believe." commented Daniel. "But even if this was a prank I wouldn't leave the person pranking me, that's just stupid."
Mylan came back after all the screaming soon after the fat man left. He ran down the slope of the crater and almost fell over after stumbling a bit. "What the hell was that?" he asked.
I replied with "Oh, the fat dude woke up and thought he was being pranked, so he left to go see if he was in a park. He'll be back."
"Well, I could not find any wood out there. That forest is as clean as a new pair of shoes! I hardly noticed a thing on the ground!" said Mylan.
"Don't worry about it. The night isn't very cold so far, so let's just see how things go." I say reassuringly. "Oh, this little guy here is Daniel. He woke up too and was smart enough NOT to run away from the camp."
"Hey Daniel nice to meet you. You sure are short aren't you?" said Mylan
"Oh shut up." he replies.
"Hey Daniel, so I guess you can't remember anything either?" wondered Tyler
"Not even a morsel of it." said Daniel. Daniel looked over to the last person asleep wearing the weird clothes. He did not say a thing, but his attention attracted ours. He got up and walked over to the dozing stranger, put his hand on their shoulder, and shook very lightly. "Hey wake up!" he started to whisper loudly as he continued his shaking.
Nothing would rouse the stranger from his sleep, so Daniel gave up and returned to us to continue talking about whatever. We all decided to sit down in a circle in the dirt with our legs crossed. Since sitting cross legged can help cause varicose veins, I sat straight legged outside of the circle. I don't want that! I started to snap my fingers for no particular reason, I only do it when I'm bored. It got louder until my new friends started to notice.
"Hey why are you siting all alone over there?" asked Mylan in his light voice.
"If I sit crossed legged then I might get varicose veins" I reply.
"What's that?" asked Daniel
"It's when your veins swell up and turn all mangled and blue. That is nasty and I want no part!" I say. At that, all of my new friends undid their folded legs and sat straight. All of silent until we heard a loud thumping noise getting closer and closer to the crater. Then the thumping started to get louder. The fat man was causing that sound while running until he reached us and fell over and rolled into the crater, nearly startling all of us. He toppled right on top of the last sleeping stranger and then rolled off.
"See! I told you he would be back." I say.
"You-were right! We, are lost, in the forest! Uhhhh!" he says with labored breaths before finally falling over to catch some more oxygen with his lungs. We all then noticed that the guy with the strange clothes awakened from his slumber and started to stretch and yawn. He had a small goatee and glasses. The strange man then stood up and started walking around until he tripped over the fatman. He fell straight on his face and his hat fell off.
"Whoa what's going on?!" he yelled.
"Here we go again..." I say while face palming. "I'm not telling him again, someone else do it."
"Were lost in the forest. Either believe us or don't." said Daniel.
The strange man stood up and brushed himself off. "We are? I can't remember anything, so can anyone tell me how we got here?" I was interested in how calm he was. That was a unique trait that not many people utilize. I am proud to say that I am one of those people.
"None of us know either. We all woke up in a crater, so I figure that it must not have been such a good thing. Tyler there and I woke up wounded." I said while pointing to Tyler. "We should all introduce each other to get confusions out of the way." I proposed.
"I'm Alexius. I am 16 years old." I say
"I'm Mylan. I'm 17 years old" says the giant.
"I'm Daniel. I'm 15." says the midget.
"I'm Tyler. I'm 20 years." said the guy with the mint-colored hair.
"Hey guys, I am Tony and I am 26." says the strangely-garbed man. I then looked over to the fat man who looked like his breath was almost caught up.
"Hey what's your name large one?" I yell.
"Hey! Don't make fun of my weight! If anyone's large it's Mylan there!" He says as he points to Mylan.
"I'm not fat either douche!" yelled Mylan.
"I meant tall..." said the fat man. I was getting tired of calling him the fat man or anything else related to obesity, so I asked for his name.
"What's your name and how old are you anyway?" I ask.
"Well, I am Sheldon, and I am about eighteen and a half. It is a way better name than Alexius. That is a girl's name." he says.
I pinch the bridge of my nose. "No it is not. It can be, but it's not. I am sorry for calling you fat, so let's stop arguing."
"Agreed." said Sheldon.
"Well then, welcome to the club of survivalists Sheldon!" yelled Daniel jokingly. Sheldon comes to sit down and plops down pretty hard into the dirt, his fat rippling. Everyone sat down in their comfortable positions. Even Mylan, Daniel, and Tyler reverted to sitting corss-legged, completely forgetting about my explanation of varicose veins. I was tired of sitting down and decided to stand up straight.
"So what should we do about staying warm in the freezing night?" asked Mylan. Everyone took a while to answer until a came up with an answer.
"I guess we could all stay sitting in a circle all night long and huddle together if any of us gets to cold. I'm not even tired and I doubt that I could sleep after any of this, so we should stay up all night and talk." I offered.
"Okay" everyone else says in a sporadic unison.
"I'm just going to go walk around the crater site for a while. I need to stretch my legs. farewell friends." I say before starting toward the rim of the crater.
"Bye. Be careful of predators if there are any." says Tyler. I continue to climb up and out of the crater. It turned out to be a whole lot darker than I once thought, as the crater looked very dark and I could hardly see my friends. I only saw their hands waving me goodbye. I walk into the dark forest in a straight path until the crater is out of sight. I continue my little adventure and walk around with silent steps, trying to keep an ear out for any other sounds that could be nearby. I also did not want to attract any predators if there happened to be any around. I continued to walk around the circular trees and noted how neat the ground looked. It's just as Mylan Described! I could not see much on the ground, just bare dirt. I normally hated dirt very much, but boy did it look neat right now! There don't seem to be any predators.
"I swear that if I am attacked by a stupid mammalian predator, I will castrate it after I cripple it." I say aloud since I am alone in the deep dark forest. "I know that humans are mammals and that I am a human, but I am not such a disgusting stupid teenager like those others that I met in high school. I swear that I just might go shoot up the school if I hear anymore of them talk about sex!"
I shudder at the digusting word. Sex. For such a short word it is pretty mortifyingly nauseating! I hate sex. I never had it before, and I never plan to because It is a disgusting act. I hate girls and women because of how annoying they are and how little you can trust them. I am not gay and I do not like girls or hermaphrodites, so what am I exactly? Something else entirely of course. Some old fat friend that I used to have that was also named Tyler always wanted to lose his virginity, so he went out do always try and get dates. He always failed miserably, but maybe that was because he was one of the most impudent, rude, digusting "humans" that I ever met! He was a disgrace to the human race. Hah, nice rhyme.
"Remember that one time when that dumb fucker in art class tried to threaten you all classy like when you sprayed liquid ass in the classroom too much?" asked my mind to myself aloud. I respond aloud as well, "Yeah, he wanted to beat me up for spraying that smelly liquid around so I could get a reaction out of people. But he didn't really threaten me, he just balled up his fists and said that he would appreciate it if I stopped. What a fucking idiot. Trying to be all gentleman-like. Fuck him and his short fat pig of a girlfriend. Overacting for something as trivial as an unpleasant smell. I'll kill them both off some day."
I was fuming with that memory, but I soon snapped out of it and started back in what I believed was the direction of the crater. I kept walking and walking and walking until I got back to the crater, where everyone was still huddled around in a circle like a bunch of Native-Americans. Before I walked back down into the crater, I noticed something very familiar off to the side hanging off of a tree branch. It looked like some kind of a suitcase. And I was right, it was my suitcase. I went over and tried to jump up to get it, but it was too high up. Then an idea struck.
I walked back into the crater and heard everyone greet me by saying "Hey Alexius.". "Hey guys. Hey Mylan, could you come help me with something?" I asked.
"Sure, what do you need?"
"I found something of mine stuck up on a tree branch, but I am too short to reach it. Could you come give it a try?'
"Sure." he says nonchalantly. Once he stood up and urged me to lead the way, I noticed that Tyler and Daniel got up to come take a look because their curiosity got the better of them. So I lead the three of them up and out of the crater and over to the tree that had the suitcase hanging off of it.
"There it is." I say whilst pointing. They all looked up.
"A suitcase huh?" he asks.
"Yep.". mylan stretched his arm and back up as much as possible while standing on his toes to try and reach the suitcase, but it was to no avail.
"Hop on my shoulders and I'll boost you up to grab it." He proposed. I nodded as he crouched down so I could climb up on him. He stood up once I was steady, and I found myself to be much taller than where the branch was, so I crouched down a bit and gently slid it off of the rough bark-encrusted branch.
"He's got it!" said Tyler so Mylan would know when to crouch and bring us down. once it was safe, I hopped off of Mylan and wrapped my free arm around his neck to hug him.
"You're welcome." he says. Without another word we all jogged back to the crater and I shared my item with Sheldon and Tony.
"A suitcase?" asked Sheldon.
"Yes. I believe I have my ipad in here. So I should be able to find out our location using an app called 'Find my iphone'! Though it's technically an ipad."
"That's brilliant! Hopefully we can get out of here!" exclaimed Tony.
I brought up my suitcase and unbuckled it and pulled it open. I marveled at its nice, red velvet interior. I saw my ipad in all of its glory next to its charger, and pulled it out. Mylan said "Oooh" at the dragon skin that I had decorated my ipad with. I noticed that I also had my laptop underneath with its charger. I lifted it up and found nothing else underneath, so I continued to turn on the ipad. It required a passcode, which I remembered was 3333. I punched in the code and listened to it click as it unlocked. What a satisfying sound that is! I fingered my way over to the "Find my iphone" app and clicked on it. I waited for it to try and find our location, but it ended up failing as it could not connect.
"Blast!" I yelled as I threw the ipad back into the case. Hard. "It didn't work!" I said angrily as I plopped down onto the hard dirt floor.
"It's okay, we could all go leave this crater tomorrow and look for civilization." said Tony.
"Yes, I suppose. I tell you though, technology is not as good as they say it is." I reply
"For real." said Sheldon.
I looked at my new friends again and smiled to each, but then I once again noticed Tony's weird fashion choice, so I decided to bring it up. "Hey Tony. What are you wearing anyway?"
"We were actually going to talk to you about that when you got back Alexius." said Tyler.
"About what?" I ask, interest piqued.
"Well Alexius, have you ever before in your life heard of the name, Rarity?" Asked Tyler.
"No, whats that?" I ask.
"What about the name, Golden Harvest a.k.a. Carrot Top?" He asked again.
"I've heard of the comedian Carrot Top if that is what you're pointing towards. What's this all about anyway?" I ask.
"Well, we were talking about Tony's clothes earlier, and we all found out that we had a common interest. We are all bronies."
"Now what the hell is a brony?" I ask completely confused.
"Have you ever heard of the show, My Little Pony?" asks Mylan.
I'm trying to figure out what they're trying to get at. "Yes, my sister watches that show all the time out our house. I never stopped to observe it."
"Well, bronies are older people like us who love the show and watch it all the time. It is an absolutely amazing show!" says Mylan while smiling.
"Oh! So that hat he's wearing is from the show. And those eyes are pony eyes?" I ask.
"Yes! We just wanted to find out if you were a brony too. If you were, we were suggesting that we should all have a get together with other bronies once this was over and attend bronycons and what not!" said Daniel. "We could still get you to like the show even though you have never seen it before."
A bunch of grown men and teenagers who watch a show that is for Little Girls? That is the most repugnant thing that I have ever heard of besides sex! How could they get into the show that much? Great, now I am stuck with a bunch of crazy people who might be gay. I will still be their friends because they were way cooler than the fat Tyler that I used to know. "No, I am okay. I do not want to be a brony, but thanks for the offer."
"Are you sure? It would be very fun!" Prodded Tony.
"I am sure. Let's talk about something else." I say.
And with that, we stopped talking about bronies and me joining them. We only talked about other things such as pizza and how much amnesia sucks. We continued talking until the constant forest darkness eventually made us all tired, so we broke out promise of staying up all night and crashed right there in a huge pile. The cold was not a big problem anymore due to our combined body heats. Perhaps we can all find civilization tomorrow and go back to our lives.
Out With The Old and In With The New
Chapter II: Indiscernible Reality
I awoke. The sun was just starting to come up and my ears picked up the chirps of birds in the distance. I slowly got up and stretched my arms and back and found that my friends were all sleeping pretty hard. My back still stung a little bit, but otherwise it did not hurt much. Tony and Sheldon both had their faces in the dirt, which did not look very good for them. I slowly rose up and was anxious to finally get out of here and find civilization, so I wasted no time to wake my buddies up. I picked up my suitcase which was next to Tony, and I crawled up and out of the crater and stood on the rim overlooking all of my slumbering comrades. I spread my arms out and started to clap extremely rapidly and vehemently to get them up.
They all slowly stirred and wiped their eyes to see what the hell was going on. "Come on guys! I'm eager to get out of this damn forest and back to my house so I can play some of my video games and hopefully figure something out!" I yell loudly.
"Jeez. How did you get so much energy?" Asked Mylan.
"I'm healthy." I respond.
"Well what about breakfast? We can't leave on an empty stomach." said Sheldon. Of course he would say that...he's fat.
"Uh, duh, we're in the middle of a forest. I doubt there is anything around here unless you want to catch and cook a chipmunk. They do seem to be very abundant. I suppose there might be berries around, but I wouldn't count on it."
"Oh well, a morning without breakfast will just make us all more tired." said Sheldon. As much as I hated to admit it, he was right. But where were we going to get food? Hell if I know.
"Well guys lets go. The sooner we can get some food the better! Let's move while we still have some energy." I propose as I pick up my suitcase and start to slowly move toward the tree line, urging my friends to follow. As I walk, I can hear my friends starting to slowly follow me as I go.
"Hey Alexius, which direction do you think we should go in?" asked Daniel as he was slowly jogging up to me.
"I don't know. Let's just keep going in one direction until we find something. It is imperative that we avoid walking in circles, or we will just be even more screwed." I say.
Mylan, Tony, Sheldon, and Tyler all catch up by speed walking and then we all slow down and start waling slowly to conserve energy. I then get the feeling of a strong thirst starting to build up. My mouth is dry from sleeping with my mouth open and my breath stinks like a dead carcass. I then remember that pond that I didn't want to drink out of earlier, so I conjured up my internal compass and found it to be straight left of where we were walking.
"Hey guys. I remember that there was a field over there when I was first exploring. I saw a pond there and it was very nice. I believe that we should go there to drink some water." I say.
"Oh yeah I know what you're talking about. I went there too when I thought that I was being pranked." said Sheldon embarrassed. "I think that we should go there too because I am so thirsty right now."
"What do you guys think?" I ask.
"Let's go!" said Mylan eager to get some water.
"I don't care what we do as long as we get out of here." said Tony. Tyler and Daniel just shook their heads and I started to lead the way.
"This way guys! I am positive that it is this way."
"Wow you must have a pretty good memory." commented Tyler. As we were walking, we all got into random conversations about shows, new video games, how school was going for everyone, and what we hated the most. Eventually we all got into the topic about that My Little Pony show and how Tyler's hair resembled one of the ponies' hair. So THAT'S why his hair was all colorful and gay? I did not want to be a part of this conversation so I remained as quiet as possible while my friends talked about it at their own leisure. It took around twenty minutes to reach the place, but eventually we did and it looked absolutely prepossessing! Last night it looked nice, but this was a whole other side to it! There was just a big grassland in the middle of a forest with a lone pond. All of the grass was green, so this must be a very healthy forest.
"Well there it is guys, lets go cure our parched throats!" I said as everyone shouted "yeah!" and we walked to the pond. I watched Sheldon slowly but surely make his face toward the pond. He then sipped nice and slowly. Everyone else followed suit and finally I found the courage to drink these strange waters. So I did. I set my suitcase down and I plunged my head into the water and found it to be slightly cold since it is early in the morning. I slowly drank and I even had my eyes open because the water was just that fresh! I could see small fish swimming around without a care in the world. I then pulled my head out and shook my head wildly and saw the water droplets fly around. I looked down into the water at my reflection and saw my face once again after a long time. I observed my flat brown hair which everyone called Hitler's hair because it was nice and flat and smooth like his and there always tended to be a loose hair strand drooping down whenever I got worked up. My green eyes looked quite nice in the reflection, and so did my flawless face. My face was so white that it I looked like a ghost! That was natural for me though since I am on the verge of being an albino. I had a square nose which I inherited from my Polish ancestors. I was the only one with a nose like that at my school as far as I knew, so it was quite unique. I have a nice curved jaw bone and straight teeth. People have always asked me if I ever had braces because they were so straight.
My friends started panicking and pointing at something and yelling "Whoa!'. I looked up to see what they were talking about and there appeared to be a wolf walking towards the pond. This wolf looked very strange as it had glowing yellow eyes and seemed to be made out of wood. Wood? That cannot be right. It noticed us, but it only wanted water as it dunked its head into the pond once it reached it. "Are you guys thinking what I'm thinking?" asked Daniel amazed.
"Yeah! That's a timberwolf! I'm not dreaming now am I?" asked Mylan as he pinched himself.
"No you are not!" said Tony. Sheldon did not see a thing a let his curiosity take hold. He started to walk towards the timberwolf until he got near it. The timberwolf still had its head underwater so it was unaware of Sheldon's presence. About ten seconds later, the timberwolf pulled its head out of the water and whipped its head towards Sheldon, baring its teeth. Sheldon was too amazed to notice it leap at him and bury its wooden teeth into his stomach.
Sheldon screamed out in pain as he tried to pry the timberwolf's jaws off of his stomach skin, but it was no use as blood started to pour from the bite wound. We were all scared of this turn of events, so we all scrambled around the pond to try and pry the wolf off of Sheldon. Mylan tried to pull its jaws open, Tony was kicking it in the stomach region, Daniel was just watching in horror as blood was still pouring, Tyler jumped in to support Mylan's efforts, and I was poking the timberwolf in the eye. its eye felt like glass as I was poking it with my thumb. My efforts were not working and this stubborn beast would just not let go.
Sheldon looked completely pale and was starting to pass out from blood loss. I beckoned Tyler to come and help me with the effort of opening the timberwolf's jaw. The four of us all pulled together, and eventually got it to let go, causing Sheldon to fall over and lose consciousness. The Timberwolf backed up and ran away into the forest from whence it came. We all turned our attention to Sheldon, and knew that we had to stop the bleeding. "Come on guys, we must all apply pressure to Sheldon's wound to stop the bleeding!" I yell.
Everyone ran over and we all pushed our hands onto Sheldon's wound to stop the blood. Sheldon's blood was leaking through our fingers and pooling on top of our palms. Tony looked very sick at the sight, but the blood made me kind of hungry, but now was not the time to eat. Eventually the pool of blood stopped rising, so we lifted our hands and saw that the bleeding stopped, and Sheldon looked like a ghost. "Hurry, we have to carry him with us and find civilization as fast as possible!" I yell. Mylan scooped him up and threw him over onto his right shoulder with his stomach facing up so the blood won't leak out. we all started to walk at a quick pace to hopefully get out of the forest. I ran over to the other side of the pond to grab my suitcase.
Many more howls started up back in the forest were we came from, signaling that the creature was bringing in reinforcements. We ran in a random direction towards the tree line opposite of where we came from. More howls started to come up, which made us run even faster into the forest. We avoided tripping over rocks poking up out of the ground and eventually ran to a large boulder with large trees all around, and decided to rest there. "What are we going to do?!" yelled Tony.
"Get out of this forest. And what was that anyway? A wooden dog?" I demanded.
"No, it was a timberwolf! I didn't think they existed, but they do! We must be in Equestria!" said Daniel in a frantic/amazed tone.
"What do you mean Equestria?!" I hiss.
"Equestria is the land of the ponies in My Little Pony where all of the ponies live! Timberwolfs are fauna that live in Equestria's forests!"
"What?! That can't be true!!" I say, but I knew that I had no other logical explanation.
"You saw it for yourself!" said Tyler.
"Fine, I'll believe you guys. But we have to keep moving or those timberwolves are going to try and eat us!"
"Yea let's get out of here." said Mylan as he got up and started to walk fast. The howls of those timberwolves sounded much closer than they did before which made us all jump up and start running past Mylan, causing him to pick up the pace as well.
We were walking for about an hour until we could walk no more. The howls of timberwolves died out about forty minutes ago, so there was no need to run and make ourselves tired anymore. We all sat down in the dirt and remained quiet. Could we really be in a strange fantasy world? Am I being pranked by a bunch of bronies? I don't think so because it all seemed so real. The blood smelled very real and even made me hungry, so that was out of the question. But wooden wolves called timberwolves? That was a terrible pun if I ever heard one, but these wolves had such realistic movements! Something that was made out of wood sure did move like the real thing!
"Hey guys, we should check Sheldon to make sure that he's alright." said Tyler.
"Yeah, he might be dead for all we know." said Tony. Mylan lifted Sheldon off of his shoulders with his great strength and placed him onto his lap so he would not get dirty on the ground. I crawled over and put my hand on his chest, which was just above his wound, to feel his heart beat. I liked to feel the heart beat in the chest because it was easier to feel than in the neck. His heart was still beating, but very, very slowly. He was paler than I, which really wasn't a good sign. He made no movements besides the slow rising of his chest signaling that he was still breathing and alive. I knew that we had to get this wound clean or it could get infected and his condition could get much worse.
"Well, he's still alive, but if we don't clean his wound, then he might die due to bacteria infections." I said.
"Come on guys, we can't stay here all day, we have to find civilization." said Daniel not wanting Sheldon to die. So we all got up and started to walk in the same direction that we were originally headed, until we started getting close to what appeared to be the forest edge, as I could see another clearing beyond the last of the trees. I pushed some tree branches out of the way for my friends to get through, and let them walk through.
"Hey look!" yelled Mylan as he pointed with his left arm at a gigantic field of apple trees, signaling a farm. We were saved, and Sheldon was a very lucky person! We decided to walk towards the forest of apple trees, and decided to eat some apples. We would pay the farmer back later, but for now we needed to eat as much as possible before we starved. I simply climbed up the tree quite easily and started to pick apples off of the tree. I hurled each one down as I grabbed them. Eventually I threw down about twenty, which I figured was plenty for the moment, and then I hurled myself down and landed on my feet.
"Well guys, let's eat!" I say eager to finally eat something. We all took whatever apple we wanted, and started to bite into the red orbs. As my straight teeth sunk themselves into the apple, I felt absolute bliss. The juices from the apple made my jaw muscles tingle in pleasure from the sour, yet sweet blend of taste within the apples. I finished biting a chunk out of the apple and savored the way it hydrated my dry throat from running from the timberwolves. I could tell my friends were also enjoying it, seeing how they quickly devoured the apples.
"You know, this apple orchard really reminds me of Applejack's orchard." said Daniel.
"Yeah, Applejack is best pony!" says Mylan.
'Great, more pony stuff, when will it end?' I think to myself again. I wanted to end this conversation as quickly as possible, but it seems something else did that before me.
"Hey! You damn varmints get away from mah apples!" yells some strange female texan voice from nearby. I was wondering who said that, as I could see nobody around, but then I noticed that Sheldon was staring in Awe at something behind me. My back was turned towards the apple orchard, so I figured that it was the farm's owner who found us. I spun around in the grass to see the farmer and hopefully get some help, but as my gaze searched for the human, all I found was an orange pony with three apples tattooed on its flank. It had a blonde mane and tail with hair ties in them and a brown stetson sitting upon its head. Its most notable feature was its huge, green eyes that seemed to stare through your soul.
I really had nothing to say, as I was too paralyzed and confused by how there was what I assumed was a pony, standing before us all. I just stared and waited for my friends to say something, but they did not.
"Well, git you damn monkeys! I had no idea that monkeys lived around these parts anyway! An' why are ya'll wearin' clothes fer?"
I slowly stood up to face the pony, and found that it was only about four feet tall. The pony seemed quite afraid of my height since her eyes widened, but she still stood strong, ready to try and kill me if I made a sudden movement. I then heard Mylan say something behind me in his high-pitched voice that hurt my ears.
"Applejack!?"
Applejack looked really freaked out by this. "Ya'll can talk!" she yelled in her high-pitched voice too. "And ya'll know mah name!?"
"Uh, yes." I say. At this, Applejack just runs away in the opposite direction, and Mylan quickly follows suit.
"Wait Applejack! There's so much I need to ask you!" yells Mylan as he ran faster than anything I have ever seen before. Soon later, both Applejack and Mylan were gone among the trees. I looked back to see the others frozen in disbelief, all except for Sheldon who still needed medical attention.
"Well? Are any of you guys going to help me carry Sheldon and find Mylan, or are you just going to stand there in lala land?" I ask. This seemed to snap them out of their day-dreaming state, and quickly go over to carry Sheldon without a word. I soon joined in and helped to lift him. Tony and Tyler lifted his legs while I lifted his head and torso. daniel just stood idly by since he was too short and weak to even try. Sheldon felt like he weighed around 400 pounds! But we still managed to get him off the ground and we slowly started to carry Sheldon inward towards the farm.
'Was any of this even real? Was I dreaming? Am I being pranked? Am I high right now?' were all questions I pondered inside of my head as we silently continued to carry Sheldon. Those timberwolves seemed very real, and now there's a pony who looks super real due to all of the body movements and what not. The truth will make itself clear in due time, but for now, I just have to go with the flow.
My arms were absolutely fatigued by having to carry the heaviest part of Sheldon, my back was starting to hurt from being hunched over for so long, and when I looked up to my friends, they seemed to be in just as deep of thought as I was. Eventually the sound of voices started to make themselves clear among all of the chirping birds and rustling leaves. We decided to just leave Sheldon behind and come back for him later, so we carefully set him down and started to run in the direction of the voices.
We came upon a very large farmhouse that was designed to look like a barn. We appeared to be behind the farmhouse, which had a chicken coop, small fields of corn, stacks of hay, and what appeared to be five storage sheds all lined up and organized. We went around the left side of the barn, which led to even more storage sheds, and Mylan arguing with now two ponies. Not ONE, but TWO! There was of course the orange one, which looked like she was ready to crack some skulls, and a larger red pony that was as tall as me! This new pony had hair as orange as the other pony, green eyes, a plowing harness around its neck, and a large green apple on its flank. Whats with all of the flank pictures? The giant red pony also had a pitchfork in its mouth. uh-oh.
"So what's your favorite food Applejack? Mine is apple pie! I bet it's yours too!"
"Git away from us ya giant ape!" yelled the red pony in a deep voice.
"Oh and you're Big Macintosh! Remember when the Cutie Mark Crusaders tried to pair you up with Cherilee? That was absolutely hilarious!" yelled Mylan. He must have been going crazy, because he seemed very calm when we were back at the camp. Either that or all of this pony stuff his getting to his brain.
The big red pony seemed absolutely freaked out by what Mylan just said, and started to charge Mylan with its pitchfork. Mylan looked ready to block it, but the red pony was charging fast. The red pony reached Mylan and drove one spike from the pitchfork through Mylan's right quadricep. I heard a wet shlick sound as it drove itself deeper and deeper into Mylan's leg and muscle. Mylan did not make a sound, but decided that it was a good idea to yank the pitchfork out. He bent over and gripped the handle with both of his hands, then pulled it out with another wet shlick .
Blood, blood, and even more blood started to pour out of the puncture. I feared that the femoral artery had been punctured, and it would seem that I was right since the blood would not stop coming. I looked over to the others who also seemed very sick. I decided to rush in and put a stop to this.
"Stop!" I yell.
"There's another one!" yelled the orange pony.
"We are not trying to hurt you! Mylan just gets excited is all!' I say pointing to Mylan.
"Come on guys!" I say trying to beckon my friends over to help me get things under control in any ways possible. I turn around to look at Mylan, but the only thing I see is two orange hooves flying at my face. I hardly remember the hooves connecting with my face, but everything goes dark, and I lose consciousness.
Out With The Old and In With The New
I awoke again and felt the oh so familiar feeling of pain. Pain always finds a way to grope me with its white hot prod. 'What happened anyway? Oh yes, I was in a world full of talking ponies called Equestria. At least that is what Tony called it, wherever he is. Did Tony really exist, or was I just dreaming the whole thing? I was probably dreaming the whole thing, because a world filled with talking, multicolored ponies and wooden wolves with glowing yellow eyes just sounds like something out of a fantasy book. '
I once again felt another throb of pain in my head as usual. I could not tell what was real or not, for this was at least my third time of being knocked senseless. I had received a concussion from a rather large, burly Mexican teen not too long ago, so I hope that I did not receive second impact syndrome, or I would be screwed. 'Speaking of screwed, I am probably dead and In purgatory awaiting a decision from some god or something. maybe this eternal darkness is heaven.'
'How did I get knocked unconscious anyway? I remember the ponies going savage and hurting Mylan, then I tried to save him through friendly dialogue, then I was knocked unconscious by that orange Texan pony named Applejack. So I must be dead or something like that.'
There was nothing to do, so I just relaxed and kept my mind quiet so I could enjoy this almost overwhelming tranquility. There was no need to close my eyes because it was so dark, and my eyes seemed to not need to be moisturized. So there I floated in purgatory, letting my ears take in the amazing sound of absolute silence. 'I need this. After all, I hardly ever get a chance to have such relaxing moments, so I will just wallow in the moment before it ends (If it ever ends.).'
The silence sustained itself, and eventually I could hear what seemed to be a heart beat.
DA,DUM
DA,DUM
DA,DUM
This strange, but familiar sound, scared me due to how sudden it was, and made me look around to try and find the source. I looked around, but found only darkness. I then spotted a small glob of pure white light out in the distance among the sea of darkness. I swam towards it (If you could call it swimming.) and noticed how the light grew bigger and bigger the closer I got. It was then that I swam into the light, ready to find out just what exactly was going on. so I swam and swam and swam, hearing that strange heartbeat again.
DA,DUM
DA,DUM
DA,DUM
The white light grew more intense, so intense that it was starting to make my body invisible. It was like I was starting to submerge myself in a bathtub full of milk, the waves of the mil flowing over and covering my pale skin. It was a strange thought, but there was no better way to describe this strange experience. And then, after what seemed like eons of silence, emerged a sound. It wasn't just a sound, but a voice. It was that annoying Texan voice. 'Applejack' .
The white light grew even more intense, and I actually started to blink as my eyes were becoming irritated by this holy light. There was no longer any darkness, just pure white light. The light then started to grow less intense, and the color yellow was starting to take over. It was that yellow that you saw when light was trying to get through the drapes in a window. Then, The yellows started to make itself more clear, and I awoke into consciousness.
I felt the familiar pain of my injured back, and the familiar feeling of deja vu. I sat up and took in my surroundings. I appeared to be in a large yellow tent with medical beds. This looked like a medics tent at an army camp. I noticed my friends were laying down on the other medical beds. On my left there was Tony, Tyler, and Daniel who appeared to be fine, just knocked out, and then there was Sheldon and Mylan in their beds next to each other on my right. Mylan had that puncture in his leg from a pitchfork, and Sheldon had a large bandage wrapped around his stomach. Sheldon still looked pale, but it was much better than earlier. Mylan's legs were just hanging off the bed due to the size difference.
'So, all of that really did happen. I have no words to explain how I feel.' . I then picked up some more voices outside of the tent behind me. I started to get up to walk around, but my head started to swirl from blood rushing to my head, so I took it easy and stretched as I got up. For some reason I did not fear the ponies outside, as I was too fascinated by the fact that all of this was real. I stumbled as I moved towards the tent flaps, making sure to be as quiet as possible. I brushed the tent flaps aside and walked outside to be greeted by a very bright sun, almost as intense as the white light I saw while I was asleep.
The sun hurt my eyes, and made me wince, so I instinctively lifted a hand up to shade my eyes from it. As my eyes adjusted, I noticed another open plain ahead of me, grass and all. I dared not look at the sun, but the bright light was coming up from the horizon, so I assumed that it was morning. The clearing was mostly grass, but there was a primitive dirt path off to the side, which signaled that I was near civilization.
I turned to the left and walked around the tent, noticing many small flowers lining the edge of the tent. The flowers were yellow, light blue, dark blue, and a few red. I continued my walk/limping around the tent until I reached the back. 'This is where I heard the voices, so I should stay as hidden as possible.'
I moved slowly and peaked around the tent, and I noticed about six different ponies. There was of course Applejack, A Purple unicorn that also seemed to have wings, a white unicorn with dark purple hair, A yellow Pegasus with pink hair, another Pegasus with many different colors, and a bubblegum pink pony. All of them had marks on their flanks. I listened in on their conversation.
"Okay, so what should we do about them?"
"They seem sentient, so I believe that informing the princess is our only solution."
"What should we do Twilight?"
"Just go live your lives, I am going to try and heal the injured ones. Fluttershy, you can stay to help with the healing process if you want. I need to strap down the uninjured ones before they wake up to avoid any unwanted accidents."
"Well jus' ta let ya know Twi, if any of em come near mah apples again ahm gonna end their pitiful lives!"
"Don't worry, I'm sure that it was all just a big misunderstanding."
"Ya better hope it was." said Applejack before turning around and leaving. All but the Purple unicorn and yellow Pegasus left. I turned around and hurried back to the entrance of the tent before lifting it up and running back to my bad to act asleep trying my best not to trip over anything in my way.
The two ponies walked in, and the unicorn hybrid started to strap us all in with its strange magic. The straps wrapped themselves over my arms and torso, as well as both of my ankles. I was completely immobilized. I figured that it was best this way since the ponies would not be so scared of me due to my incapacitation.
"Take a note spike."
"Right away Twilight!"
"Dear Princess Celestia,
I have captured and restrained six strange primate-like beings. The were all wearing clothes, and Applejack claimed that they talked to her, meaning that they must be sentient. They are all quite tall, ranging between four feet tall to around almost seven feet tall. I would like to request you to come and take a look for yourself, because I have no idea what to do. I am currently on the outskirts of ponyville in the grasslands with the subdued creatures, because I don't know if they are a threat or not.
Your faithful student,
After that, I heard what sounded like a large flame being shot out, and then nothing.'So there was a male here as well acting as an assistant?'
After that I felt small yet hard appendages feeling my body. They lifted my shirt, and undid my pants. I guess they were looking for wounds.
"Hey Twilight, They ummm, all have male parts."
"So they are all males? That doesn't help us at all Fluttershy. Did you find any wounds?"
"No."
I heard what sounded like a loud belch, and then something soft dropped to the floor.
"The princess responded!"
I heard a rolled up paper being unraveled, and then the hybrid started to talk again.
"Dear Princess Twilight Sparkle,
Sincerely,
I sat thinking about all of this. So there were unicorns here that could use magic, and there were pegasi here, meaning that this land was magical. I guess wooden wolves weren't enough, now I have to watch out for magic. The only experience that I've had with magic was in video games, but this was real life now, so caution was indeed necessary.
I decided that I had enough waiting and now was the time to meet these ponies.
I lifted my head and saw the ponies tending to Sheldon and Mylan, not noticing me at all. I saw a small lizard thing sitting down in a chair near the flaps to the tent. He took notice of me soon after I stared at him, and started to freak out.
"Twilight! That one's awake!"
The ponies spun around, and their large eyes met with mine. That really freaked me out. The purple unicorn lifted a syringe with its magic and started to bring it towards my arm. I figured that it was a sedative, and I really did not want to go back to sleep, so I struck up a conversation.
"Hey! Don't put me back to sleep! I have been asleep too long!"
The purple unicorn seems to listen, and lowers the syringe. "Oh! So you can talk! I have so many questions to ask you!"
"I would like you to answer my questions first if that's okay." I say
"Sure!"
"What happened to us?" I knew the answer to some of that, but I wanted to see what the unicorn would say.
"Well, my friend Applejack saw you as a threat, so she bucked you in the head. Your friends were too stunned to do anything else until I arrived, so I cast a sleep spell on them."
"So why did you try to sedate me if you have magic?" I ask.
"Well, I don't want to waste my magic."
"Can you let me out of these straps please?" I beg.
"I am afraid I can't do that, I need to make sure that you are not a threat first." said the purple hybrid with a frown.
"I assure you that I am no threat! I am offended that you think of me as such. Even if I were to attack you, you have magic. I am just so tired of laying down." I say.
"Well, I suppose that it would be alright, but if you do anything bad, then you will have to deal with the goddess of the sun."
"I swear that I will not do a thing." I say wondering who the goddess of the sun was.
"Okay then." says the purple hybrid while using her magic to undo my straps, her horn glowing a nice purple as she did so. I got up and stretched again, and the blood rushed to my head causing me to almost fall over. 'Man that was getting annoying.'
The ponies were quite small, and both looked up at me in awe. I looked over to the small lizard thing.
"And what are you exactly?"
The purple hybrid cut in before it could answer. "That's Spike! He's my assistant dragon!"
"Hey." He says shyly while looking away.
"Who and what are you then? I've heard of unicorns and pegasi, but not one with both." I ask.
The hybrid stands of straight and prepares for a proper introduction. "My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I am an alicorn."
"An alicorn hm? I've never heard of that, but I know that you're a princess because of that letter reading."
"Oh you heard that? Well yes I am, but I don't like to be addressed as such. I don't like the attention." says Twilight.
"I understand, so I'll just leave it alone." I say.
"Thanks. This is my friend Fluttershy." she says while pushing the timid yellow Pegasus pony towards me. "As you may have already guessed, she is very shy, and needs to warm up to ponies before she can act normal around them.
"Well salutations Fluttershy, it's nice to meet you too. I haven't properly introduced myself to you guys yet, so I'll get it over with. "My name is Alexius, and I am a Human." I say.
"Well it's nice to meet you Alexius the human. No offence but that is a very strange name." says Twilight Sparkle.
"None taken." I say. Fluttershy still hasn't said anything since I woke up, and she reminded me of when I was a shy boy in elementary school. Those were some of the worst years of my life.
I heard a loud THUMP! outside before I could continue talking with these strange equines. Twilight Sparkle started to freak out yelling "The princess is here!". "
"What princess? you mean this god of the sun that you were talking about earlier?" I ask.
"Yes! She controls the sun's movement during the day. she is also the ruler of our country!"
"How is a princess a ruler of a country? A princess is the daughter of the ruler, so it doesn't make any sense."
"No time to explain! The princess is going to decide your fate, so act friendly and don't offend her." says Twilight starting to whisper to avoid having princess overhear her. She then left the tent to go greet her, leaving me in an awkward situation with Fluttershy and Spike, who tried their best to avoid my piercing gaze.
I stood up proud and tall, ready to meet a goddess. I awaited for this princess to come into the tent, which did not take too long. She walked in very calmly and proudly. Her size made me quite intimidated, as she was about 5'10. Her mane and tail were a glorious rainbow that waved even though there was no wind, and was complemented well by her golden crown, shoes, and chest plate. Her horn was longer than Twilight's horn, which made me assume that she has very powerful magic. She also had one of those weird pictures on her flank.
"OH! One of you is awake." she said in a soothing voice.
Without wasting any time, I gave the best introduction that I could. "You must be Princess Celestia, I am Alexius the Human. I am humbled to be in you presence. My friends are Tlyer, Mylan, Daniel, Tony, and Sheldon." I say pointing to each respectively.
"Greetings Alexius, I am glad that you are respectful. It's quite rare that a foreigner is so respectful towards me, as most are quite rude. I've never seen your species here before, so that makes you my first. And I am happy to say that we got off to a good start."
"Thank you princess." I say.
"Princess Twilight, I believe that you should wake the other humans, I don't want to have to repeat the same thing twice."
"Yes princess." says Twilight without hesitation. I see her horn glow purple again, which made my friends' heads glow purple as well. In about ten seconds, my friends jumped up in fear, signaling that they still had some remnants of yesterday on their mind. They stopped panicking as soon as they saw princess Celestia though.
"Greetings humans, welcome to Equestria." Says Celestia.
"P-P-P!" starts Daniel before he shuts himself up.
"Listen closely humans, for I have little time to inform you. You all seem quite nice, and I have no qualms in allowing you to stay in my fair country, so I will let you decide where you want to live. Any of you can choose to live anywhere, just tell me and it will be done. I want all of you to feel welcome in Equestria.
Mylan spoke first, "I would be most appreciative if I could live in Ponyville."
"Done. We are all on the outskirts of Ponyville, so that will work well."
Tyler spoke up, "I would like to live here in Ponyville too if that's okay."
"Of course Tyler." says Celestia.
Daniel spoke up, "I would like to live with you in the castle princess."
"Hmmmm, I suppose it would be alright. Perhaps you could tell me about your home and what it's like there?"
"Sure!" yells Daniel.
"And what about you Tony?' She asks.
Tony spoke up almost immediately, "Ponyville would be great."
"Sure, you all love Ponyville don't you?"
"I would like to live in Fillydelphia!" Sheldon says elatedly.
"Someone wants to live big hm?" she says. Sheldon only nodded.
"And what about you Alexius?" she asks.
"I remain undecided, so I guess that I will just stay in Ponyville for now."
"Fair enough. Sheldon and Mylan, you are both still injured from yesterday's encounters, so take it easy." Sheldon and Mylan both looked down at their injuries and frowned a little.
"Mylan, I know that Applejack's brother wounded you, but what happened to you Sheldon?"
"I was bit by a timberwolf." he says shuddering at remembering that moment.
"Well don't worry, you'll heal in no time I'm sure." says Celestia with a reassuring smile which made Sheldon smile a bit. "Well, I must go. Equestria won't run itself. Daniel, you can come with me back to Canterlot castle. You can come with us too Sheldon, I'll have my royal guard ponies drop you off in Fillydelphia with somepony to guide you. The rest of you can just stay here and princess Twilight will guide you all. Celestia started to walk out of the tent, and everyone followed. Celestia, Sheldon, and Daniel all boarded the chariot, and everyone waved goodbye.
"Bye guys! Thanks for looking after me! And don't think I forgot about you Daniel!" while giving Daniel a noogie.
Among all of the goodbyes, I noticed the royal guard ponies. They had very neat armor! It was all gold and had some nice blue brush design that really made the armor look impressive. The chariot soon took to the skies and disappeared towards the large castle built into the side of the mountain.
"Hey Twilight, is that Canterlot?" I ask while pointing to the castle.
"Yes it is." Twilight said with a smile. "Well, let's go guys, I have a lot to teach you."
"Bye Twilight! yells Fluttershy as she flies away.
"Bye!" she yells back. Mylan, Tyler, and Tony just waved without really knowing it since they were all sucked up into their new lives.
Spike came out of the tent, "Hey Twi? Are we heading back to the library?" he asks.
"Yep! And these guys are coming back with me to learn about Equestria!" she says happy to teach newcomers.
"Oh I guess I'll make extra sandwiches at lunch then." said Spike.
"Um Twilight, is it okay if I just stay out here in the grassland for a while? I have to think some things over." I say.
"Oh, I suppose that's okay. Just don't go near the Everfree forest. It is a dark forest, so it isn't hard to spot."
They all started to head toward Ponyville, and waved back at me. I waved to them before sitting in the shade of the tent so I didn't burn my skin in the sun. I saw Ponyville in the distance, and Tony in his pony jacket. I imagine that it is going to be awkward when he encounters that same pony where the idea of the jacket came from. I wish I could see that, but I need time alone for once. So I sat, admiring the huge, open grassland.
I sat and meditated with my legs crossed and my hand in my lap, trying to calm down from all of the recent events. "Wow, those bronies really weren't gay! They were just fans. I see! Just fans who got sucked up into this imaginary world, literally." I say aloud.
I started to notice how hungry I was, as I only ate one apple over a time of two days. Maybe I should have went with them to get food in Ponyville. No, I can wait. I am really hungry for meat though, and I wonder if they sell any there. "Hey I know! I should go steal some apples from Applejack's orchard. I don't like her, and she owes me after kicking me in the face. Speaking of my face, I wonder how it looks after that incident."
I get up and walk through the tent flaps. I am greeted to the light smell of blood and medicine. "Twilight still left a bunch of stuff here, so I am guessing that she'll come back later for it.". I spot a supply bag with a red cross on it, meaning that it was a medical bag. I crouch down and unzip it to look for a mirror. I dig through many different tools including a blood pressure measurer, many different syringes with caps on them, a stethoscope, a small flashlight, and wraps of bandages. I did not find a mirror until I reached the bottom. I snatched it out, eager to see what my face looked like.
I looked into the mirror, and saw that my face looked pretty normal, besides the fact that both of my eyes were bruised making me look like a raccoon. "Well Applejack, you made me look like a raccoon, so now I am going to act like one by stealing some of your apples."
I take a sedative because I feel that I will need it for some reason, and then I walk through the tent flaps to be greeted once again by Celestia's sun. "So I met a god, and I did a good job at it! Very few creatures can say they did that!" I say happily.
I don't know where Applejack's farm is, but I remember seeing her walk away towards the back of the tent earlier, so I'll head that way and look for apple trees. I started to walk, my stomach hurting every time I took a step due to my hunger. I walked through the grass, and noticed many small insects flying around such as ladybugs and small dragonflies. I tread lightly, not wanting to hurt the cute little things. I continued walking, thinking about how the ponies might react to a bunch of aliens suddenly appearing in their town. At least when I get there, they won't overact as much.
I started thinking to myself about these ponies and how they act. I know that their world is not just full of peace and harmony due to how Applejack and that red pony reacted. So there must be some violence that goes on somewhere. This is a world full of magic, so things can definitely go wrong.
I eventually came across a small white fence, and was happy to note that there were apple trees not too far away on the other side. I quickly crouched down behind the fence to avoid any farmer's gazes. I looked around and did not see anything, so I hopped the fence with little effort and made a dash for the nearest tree. When my form was hidden behind the tree, I jumped up and grabbed a branch while ignoring the bark that was scratching and hurting my skin. I hoisted myself up and hid among the leaves like an jaguar waiting for prey.
I started picking up apples and eating as much as I could. I kept eating and eating and eating until the apples started taste odious and my stomach was filled up. Every apple that I devoured, I dropped to the ground below, hearing a soft thump every time one landed. I wanted to leave the apple remains behind so Applejack would find them and get upset. I was counting each apple that I ate, and when I was done with my little deed, I totaled that I devoured twenty apples. "I did not know that I had it in me!".
I drop from the tree as silently as a 140 pound human could, and hopped over the fence again. I ran back in the direction of the tent because I did not want to get caught. The last thing that I wanted to be called by these ponies was a pest. Everyone back in my neighborhood always called me a pest. That escalated into much more, but I do not want to think about that or I will just bring up more bad memories. This is my new life and I was going to start over. "Out with the old and in with the new!"
I came upon the clearing again and saw the large tent in all of its glory. I ran over to the entrance feeling alive! I even jumped a bit along the way because I was just excited! I ran into the tent and found a strange sight indeed. I saw a large bipedal canine creature digging through the bags frantically like it was having a adrenaline rush. It did not notice me until I spoke up to get its attention.
"Can I help you sir?"
The canine beast spun around and stood at its full height, which was up to my neck. That was still dangerous because it could bite me there without too much effort. Then the dog started to talk as well.
"You're strange diamond dog yes?"
"No I am not. What's a diamond dog?" I ask confused.
"We only try to survive. We want no quarrel with hairless pink creature."
"Okay. Take whatever you want." I say.
"Thankee!" it says before taking some bags and running past me out of the tent. That was certainly strange, but I did not bother to think about it too much. This was a strange new world with magic and there were many strange things that I did not know about, so it's best not to freak about it too much.
"Hey, at least he gave me an excuse to steal a sedative for myself. I'll just blame it on the diamond dog."
I went outside and basked in the sun and saw the diamond dog run away into the trees. I paid him no heed as I could feel the vitamin D being soaked into my system, and it made me feel happier. I ran out into the grassy field and starting jumping up into the air and falling down into the grass below. I started to roll around in the grass feeling very happy about myself and life. I rolled next to a flower and smelled it vigorously. I then just sat there lying down and making grass angels. "This must be what cats feel like when they are given cat-nip!"
I then stop moving and feel the sun upon my face. I take a deep breath and relax as multiple ladybugs flew around, some landing on my shirtless torso. "Oh that's right! I need a shirt. Eh, I'll wait. I have the rest of my life to think about shirts.
THUMP !
That sound almost gave me a heart attack when I was in my relaxed state. My head rose quickly and swiveled around to look for the thing that made that noise. I spotted Fluttershy, the lone Pegasus just standing up and staring at me. I did not know what to do, so I just tried to strike up a small conversation.
"Hey Fluttershy! What brings you here?"
She just stared with big eyes, not saying a thing and making me a little bit nervous.
"Um, I thought that you went to town with Twilight and the other humans."
"I decided not to go yet because I needed some time to myself."
"Oh okay. I just saw you over here in the field from my cottage and thought that I would come and say hi."
"Well thanks for making me feel a little more welcome Fluttershy! It means a lot to me. At least you didn't kick me in the head like Applejack did." I say.
"Oh yes. I noticed your black eyes. Applejack overreacted! She shouldn't always try to fight things that she doesn't understand!"
"I agree, thanks for giving me company Fluttershy!"
"It's really no problem. I have plenty of green tea at my house and was wondering if you would like some. Hopefully that would make up for what Applejack did."
"I would love some. Where is your cottage anyway?"
"It's over there." she says while pointing with her hoof. "I might be able to heal those black eyes while you visit Alexius. That is your name right?
"Yes."
"Well come along, I bet you want some of that tea hm?"
"You bet Fluttershy." I say as I get up and started walking towards her cottage. I don't know how I didn't see the cottage earlier, I guess I was just sucked up in the moment. Well I believe that I made one new friend, and I believe that we would get along just fine.
Out With The Old and In With The New
I sat thinking about how things were going and how they were affecting me. Maybe being thrown into Equestria wasn't such a bad thing because I didn't leave my old home on such a good note. Things here seemed quite peaceful, and I was always on my toes and stressed out, so this would work out just fine. Some would think about how absurd it was that I just accepted living in a world filled with small sentient ponies, but there's nothing else I can really do besides just accept life here. This world was also filled with magic, so that was a huge improvement that made me accept living here more and more.
I sat on Fluttershy's green couch lounger thing and was amazed at how large this cottage actually was. She had a large stairway with an upstairs bathroom, and her living room was very roomy. She had small cages everywhere, and I noticed that she had a chicken coop outside, so I figured that she must be a veterinarian or something else related to animals. Fluttershy was in the next room making some green tea for us to drink while we chatted some more. I could smell the tantalizing aroma coming from the kitchen, and it made my jaw muscles tingle from wanting to get it into my mouth. I loved my green tea!
"It's almost finished!" hollered out Fluttershy from the kitchen with her soft little voice.
"Okay!" I yell back before getting back to observing Fluttershy's living room. Being in someone else's house for the first time was always a strange experience. Call me over exaggerative, but it was like a whole new world. I noticed that there was a smaller door built into the main door for animals to get through. Before I could snap my attention away from it, a small white rabbit pushed its way through the door, its ears shooting up once it fully got through the door. It looked at me like I was the most annoying thing in existence before it charged at me. It bounced ferociously like a rubber bowling ball, but when it finally made contact with my leg, it felt like a small, rubber golf ball. The small white rabbit was clawing and kicking my leg, only barely managing to lift it up so it could bite my leg. That was when it started to hurt.
"Ow!" I yell while trying to pull the rabbit off of my leg. Its teeth had a strong grip on my leg, so it would not let go. I put my hands in between its jaws and my leg and started to softly pull the jaws off just like when I was trying to get the timberwolf off of Sheldon. The rabbit let go, but jumped up at my chest and bit my nipple before I had a chance to react.
"OOOOOOOOW!" I yell trying to get Fluttershy's attention. I heard a spoon fall to the counter in the kitchen, and then she came into the living room and saw the sight. I was standing up hunched over with a small white rabbit hanging off of my nipple with its buck teeth.
"Angel! You let go of Alexius this instant mister or I wont put any carrots in your dinner!" yelled Fluttershy in a mix of a whisper and a loud demand. The rabbit crossed its arms while still hanging off of my nipple, and then it released its grip and fell to the floor with a soft thump on Fluttershy's red carpet. The bunny hopped away looking disgruntled.
"Oh my, I hope Angel didn't hurt you."
"Don't worry, It wasn't so bad. Is the tea almost done because I would like to talk for a while Fluttershy." I say.
"Yes, I was just mixing the tea." she says before heading back into the kitchen. Flutershy walked out with the drinks balanced on a plate balanced on her back. I stared dumbfounded at how she did that. She walked over to the dining table in the corner of the living room and tilted her back so the plate slid off of her back and onto the table.
"Well, it's ready!" she says trying to sound chipper about it. I walked over to the table and pulled out one of the small wooden chairs so I could sit down. I unsurprisingly found the chair to be almost too small for me since it was made to seat ponies and not humans, but I kept quiet about it because I did not want to be a burden on Fluttershy. I grasped the puny teacup with my meaty fingers and lifted it up to my mouth so I could savor its flavor. I felt the lukewarm liquid flood over my tongue and leak down my throat, which made my jaw muscles tingle from how sweet it was. I could definitely tell that there was honey inside of it, which only made the tea even better to drink. I set the tea down and looked up to Fluttershy who was in the middle of drinking her own tea.
"That is some very good tea Fluttershy."
Fluttershy set down her cup when she was done drinking and looked up to me with her blue eyes. "Well thank you very much. I make it every day, so I always get to experiment a little with my flavors."
"Well Fluttershy, what should we talk about now that we have some time to ourselves?"
"What do you want to talk about?"
I thought about what I wanted to talk about in this whole new world, my mind trying to come to a consensus. I then thought about talking about magic and such. I discarded that topic because I wanted to get taught by Twilight Sparkle later. my mind brought up the topic about ponyville, so I started. "What about Ponyville? Is there anything I should know about the town before I head in later?"
"I think that you should worry about buying a house later once you arrive so you have a place to live. Oh! But the very first thing that you should do once you get into town is buy some clothes."
"Fluttershy, I don't think that they sell my species' clothes in ponyville."
"No, but my friend Rarity makes clothes for anyone who has money to buy it. Sometimes she is very generous, so she just might make you the clothes for free, or out of pity that you have no clothes to wear."
"Where does she make clothes?" I ask.
"She makes them at her store: The Carousel Boutique. It is a big building across a bridge in town that looks very fancy. It is the fanciest building in town."
"Yeah, I suppose that I should get some clothes as soon as possible." I start to think about other things to talk about, then it hits me, the government.
"Hey Fluttershy."
"Hmmm?" she says while sipping her tea.
"I was wondering this ever since we arrived, but now I have a chance to figure it out. What is the deal with the government. How does it work here exactly? I don't get why the title of princess is the highest title in the government."
Fluttershy seemed to shudder at the thought, which made me concerned. She then gets up out of her chair and hovers over to the windows. She pulled the blinds over each window prior to hovering over to the door to lock it. She then flew over to her lamp and shut it off. I was really confused about her actions. "Fluttershy. what is going on?" I asked with a soft and concerned tone.
Fluttershy flies over to her chair again and sits down. "There's something about the government and authorities that I think that you really should know. I never told any of my other friends because they are too close to the princesses, but you seem like you might understand."
"Like what?"
"Princess Celestia may have seen very nice, but she is actually very evil and I think that you should have nothing to do with her!" Fluttershy says aloud before clamping her hooves over her mouth and looking past her blinds to see if anyone heard her.
"What do you mean by evil?" I asked very interested.
"Some things are too horrible to talk about aloud, but once when I was walking around her castle for a visit, I came upon a room that had a lot of activity going on in it. I knew it was rude to peek in without permission, but my curiosity got the best of me. I peeked my head around the corner to see what was going on, and saw Princess Celestia and Princess Luna murdering somepony that I did not know! They were stabbing him over and over and over again!" said Fluttershy while grabbing her head in fear and shaking like a leaf.
"Tha-" I begin before getting cut off.
"But that wasn't the worst of it! I then saw the princesses start to rape the dead body! I could not move because I was so scared and did not know what to do! The sexual acts did not last long, so I then saw tem start to chop the body up into pieces! That is when I slowly crept out and walked away, trying to stay calm and not freak out."
"That uh, that sounds like something ripped out of a horror movie Fluttershy."
"I'm telling you that's the truth!" said Fluttershy angrily.
"Ok ok, did you tell anyone else about this besides me?"
"Anyone else? Oh you mean anypony. No, I only told you so far because you seem very understanding."
I picked up my tea and drank all of it. "Ok Fluttershy, so you say the princesses are murderers? Not just murderers, but vicious psychopaths?"
"Yes and not just them. I also overheard some of her guards talking about something bad when I came back with my friends for another visit."
"What were they talking about?"
"The guards were talking about how they all raped somepony the night before after they caught her walking alone out in the castle gardens." said Fluttershy wincing.
"You will?!" says Fluttershy loudly.
"Of course, we are friends aren't we? What kind of a friend would I be if I did not believe you?"
Fluttershy shoots over the table, nearly knocking the cups over, and wraps me in a huge hug while still fluttering in the air a bit. I return the hug softly since I did not want to hurt her. I pull her out of the air and set her down on the ground next to me before standing up.
"Well Fluttershy, I had better get going. And if what you said about Princess Celestia is true, then I better remain vigilant. And I am guessing that I should watch out for Princess Luna too?"
"Yes, she is the goddess of the moon and is able to control its motion in the sky."
"Ok then, I must go and see Twilight so I can get settled in at Ponyville." Fluttershy responds by gliding over to the door, pulling out her key and unlocking it.
"Don't tell anyone I told you this or let the princess know. I am afraid of what she might do..." said Fluttershy
"Don't worry, I won't do that. I'll be honest when I say that I felt suspicious about the princess the first time I met her too."
"Take care!" says Fluttershy before she closes and locks her door again.
I begin my walk back to the tents at the camp, thinking about what had just occurred. I was in a magical world filled with talking ponies that seems so peaceful, but according to Fluttershy there was also some creepy violence going on. I was just going to believe Fluttershy for now and deal with that later. For now, I needed to fit into pony society.
I arrived back at the camp, it was all quiet, until I heard a small noise from inside the tent again. Could it be that giant dog creature again? What did it call itself? Oh right, a diamond dog. I crept over to the entrance to the tent and slowly lifted the flaps aside to see inside. I spotted Princess Twilight Sparkle going through some of her bags, looking a little bit upset. I pushed the tent flaps aside and walked in.
Twilight Sparkle looked at me. "Alexius! Do you happen to know where my sedatives went? You didn't take them did you?"
I knew that I had to use the dog as a scapegoat or else she would search me, so I did. "I was in this tent all alone thinking about things, but then I was interrupted when a tall dog walked in and stole them. I tried to stop him, but he threatened to kill me with a knife that he pulled out, so I stayed back helpless. He then ran away into the forest nearby."
"Oh those stupid diamond dogs!"
"diamond dogs?" I ask feigning a lack of knowledge.
"They are just a bunch of savages that kidnap ponies and use them for slaves in their diamond mines. They sometimes steal from unguarded places like this."
"I'm sorry I couldn't do anything about it" I said.
"Don't worry, you are a guest here, so I wouldn't force you to fight."
"Thank you."
"So are you ready to go see Ponyville, you sure have been here a while?" asked Twilight.
"I sure am!" I say
"Great, then let's go" says Twilight as she walks out, beckoning me to follow. I catch up, and were both heading in the direction to Ponyville, with the sun much lower than earlier. I decided to talk to Twilight so I could find out how my comrades did earlier. "So, how did the others adjust to Ponyville? Did the ponies freak out when you first arrived with them?"
"Yes, the ponies freaked out. They ran into their houses and hid out of sight until we left. I could not get the ponies to calm down and get used to the other humans with my presence, so they are still scared. The other humans are at the library living with me, which is where you will be staying as well until I can find someplace for you all to live."
"What did you do with the other humans while I was away?"
"Well, when we got through the town and into my library, I got the humans settled in, and then I started to teach them the basics of Equestrian society. It's too bad that you were gone, because you missed the first lesson. I can teach you it all tonight though, so it's not that big of a deal."
"Princess Twilight Sparkle, I am very sorry that I made an inconvenience for you."
"It's no problem really, I like to teach things to others."
We arrived on Ponyville's borders, crossing over the bridge and going into town. The ponies that were around all took one look at us (mainly me), and high tailed it out of there yelling "MONSTER!" every now and then. I paid them no heed as we walked through town, eventually coming upon the marketplace where there were a ton of ponies. All looked at me and ran away while raping my ears with the constant "MONSTER!". Eventually Twilight and I reached a giant tree, which I assumed was the library. A very strange architectural design, but then I remembered that I was in a foreign world, so there was not much to argue about.
I rushed ahead before Twilight could reach the door and opened it for her. It was a public library so it only made sense that it would be open. Twilight walked through door saying "Thank you!". I walked through door and shut it. I walked in to be greeted to a large circular room with books resting in carved out spaces of the tree's interior. The roof had a giant sun decoration on it, which reminded me of Celestia and her deeds. I brushed that aside and admired how roomy and well kept it looked. I then noticed my friends sitting around the library reading random books, probably trying to gain more knowledge of Equestria. Mylan was laying down in a prone position, Tyler was slumped against the wall, and Tony was standing up while reading.
"Well boys, Alexius is finally here, so you can catch up while I get ready for his first lessons. I'll be about an hour, so go ahead and have fun!" said Twilight while walking up the stairs probably to her bedroom, hooves clopping all the way. Tyler, Mylan, and Tony all dropped their books and ran up to me to wrap me into a group hug, with which I responded with my own hug. They all let go and we got ready to catch up.
"Alexius where were you all day?" asked Tyler.
"I was out thinking in the fields trying to adjust to this new world. I am guessing that it isn't all that new to you guys is it?"
"Nope, we know pretty much everything there is to know about Equestria. Princess Twilight Sparkle will teach you about it so hopefully you won't go and get yourself lost." said Mylan.
I looked over to Tony who was still in his white pony jacket and was curious to know if any of the ponies noticed it. "Hey Tony, did any of the ponies notice your jacket? It is a pony jacket, so did any of them notice it or get creeped out by it?"
"No, they didn't really notice that it looked like Rarity. They only saw a white jacket." said Tony.
"Wait, I heard of Rarity. Doesn't she sell clothes?"
"You know who Rarity is? How?" asked Tony
"This pony named Fluttershy told me that if I ever needed clothes then I should visit Rarity at the Carousel Boutique."
"Woah you met Fluttershy! Luuuuuuucky!" said Tyler aloud.
"How do you guys know Fluttershy?" I ask.
At this, Tyler, Mylan, and Tony all exchanged glances and told me to sit down. I happily did, and soon they sat down with me. "I think that it's time that we teach you the basics of what all bronies know, so that you know what Equestria is like. I liked the idea of learning beforehand, so I stuck my ear out to listen.
"Go ahead. I am ready to learn." I say.
Tyler, Mylan, and Tony all started to explain things about Equestria to me going from topics such as the princesses, to subjects like the elements of harmony. They even taught me about other races that are out there such as Gryphons, Buffalo and Minotaurs. They taught me about how princess Luna used to be an evil god know as Nightmare Moon, that there was a spirit of Chaos named Discord that ravaged the land, and an insectoid named Queen Chrysalis who wanted to steal emotions from the ponies and create minions called changelings. They taught me about the species of fauna that lived in Equestria, the monsters, and the plants. They taught me about the cities that were apart of Equestria such as the magical city of Cloudsdale and Appleoosa. They taught me the storyline of Equestria which helped me to understand a lot. They said that the mane six were the main characters and that Twilight and Fluttershy were apart of the group. They taught me about cutie marks and how they affected the ponies with them.
When I learned the basics, I had a much greater understanding of my new home and I was ready to live in it. apparently Fluttershy might have been right about this whole thing about how Equestria wasn't as peaceful as it may have seemed. my friends told me that they were reading history books and newspapers that included violent events. In the newspapers, there seemed to be articles about a war between the Equestrians and the Gryphon tribes. Just the tribes wanted to fight the Equestrians and not the Gryphon Empire. So there was a lot of bloodshed going on in the mountains between the two countries. In the history books they said that they read that there were periods of complete bloodshed and destruction. In addition to that there was also history of a lot of torture. There were temples erected in the middle of the Everfree Forest which were dedicated to torturing the poor souls who were ever put in there. These tortures included flaying, boiling alive, iron mule rides, starving ponies to death, having guts eaten by pigs, and that torture where they make rats burrow into your body.
It all sent a shiver down my spine, as I can imagine what many of those tortures would feel like. 'If they did it back then, then why wouldn't they do it now? They're still primitive in technology, so it seems quite likely.'
"Alexius! Are you ready for your lessons?!" yelled Twilight from upstairs.
"Yes!" I yell.
Twilight comes down the stairs with a small notepad and hands it to me. "That's so you can take notes while I teach!" she says sounding overly happy.
"Ok, let's get started." I say, ready to learn some new things. Twilight pulled over a pillow with her magic and set it down, then proceeded to lay down on top. I responded by flipping my notebook open to the first page and placing my pencil's tip on the paper.
"Let's start with Equestria's history, the clean version" says Twilight. That let me know that she is aware of Equestria's dark history.
I listened and continued to tiredly take Cornell notes. Twilight taught me about the three tribes of ponies that came to Equestria for survival purposes: The Earth ponies, the pegasi ponies, and the unicorns. They all fought over the lands of Equestria, causing spirits called windigos to come and make Equestria as frozen as the lands they emerged from. The leaders of the tribes all united and became one country known as Equestria under pressure of being frozen by the windigos. Once all fighting had ended between the tribes, they began to build up the new country. It wasn't long before the spirit of chaos known as Discord came, and it was unknown where he came from. He started to take over Equestria with his powerful magic and became a tyrant. None was powerful enough to stop him, until the alicorns emerged. I had to cut Twilight off because I was confused...
"Twilight, where exactly did the alicorns come from?"
"You mean the princesses? I have no idea! I never bothered to ask them, maybe I should ask Celestia next time I see her."
I got a strange feeling about the unknown origins of alicorns, so I stored it away in my brain for later. I also wondered how the princesses could be goddesses of the sun and the moon if the moon and the sun existed before them. Could the princesses be frauds?
"I think that I've learned enough for now Twilight, I get it all quite well." I say, tired of learning.
"But we haven't even gotten to know any of the animals or plants of Equestria!" said Twilight.
"I was reading most of the time about Equestria while you were upstairs doing whatever it was you were doing." I lied.
Twilight shuddered after I said that, which made me concerned. "Well okay then. If you feel confident about your education, then I won't reteach you everything you already know. I am proud of you for reading and learning before even getting taught!"
"Thank you Twilight, I think that I shall retire tonight so I can get up fresh in the morning. Speaking of retiring, where should I sleep tonight?" I ask.
"I have plenty of sleeping bags upstairs for sleepovers with my friends. I'm sure that they won't mind if I let you guys sleep in them tonight." offers Twilight.
"That should do just fine. Thank you Twilight."
*knock knock knock knock knock*
I look over to the door, a little spooked by the sudden knocking as it made me jump a bit. My human friends were interrupted from their reading, and looked over to the door waiting to see who it was. Twilight walked over to the door and opened it with her magic. We all saw a green pony with a swirl of white and mint green hair color, much like Tlyer's dyed hair. I figured that this was the pony that made Tyler want to dye his hair. I looked over at him and he looked happier than any human I've ever seen before in my life.
"Can I help you Lyra?" asked Twilight.
"Yes, I heard news that you had creatures called humans here, and I was wondering if I could offer to take one in to live with me because I love them so much! That also takes another human off of your hands to worry about! I can only take one though because my roommate bonbon would be furious if I took more than that." said Lyra with a frown.
"I suppose that it would be okay. It would certainly help the humans to adapt to pony society. Do you want to meet them? Maybe that way you can find which one is best."
"Do I?!" yelled Lyra happily as she started to run into the library, where she saw me first because I was standing up. She leapt into the air at me and collided with me full force which knocked me to the wooden floor of the library. Before Lyra could do anything else, Twilight lifted her into the air with her magic and kept her from doing anything else stupid.
"Lyra! You can't just leap on them nearly giving them a concussion and expect them to want to live with you!" said Twilight furiously.
"I'm sorry, I am just so excited to finally get to see one of these creatures in my life!"
"Yes yes you're always talking about it. Now go choose one and go. You would be doing me a favor by teaching them about Equestrian society.". Twilight then gently lowered the mint green unicorn to the ground so she could peruse us like food at a market. We all sat down while she looked over each of us carefully inspecting us with her golden eyes until she noticed Tyler with hair like hers. She got up into his face.
"Where did you get that hair style!" asked Lyra with wide eyes.
"I liked the colors... a lot." said Tyler.
Lyra turned her head around to look at Twilight who was watching the while process with a smile. "Twilight, I think I have decided which one I shall take in and teach!"
"Which one?"
"This one with my hair color!" She turned around to face Tyler again, "What's your name anyway buddy?"
Tyler mimicked me earlier when I was introducing myself to the princess by standing tall. He then said his name proudly. "Lyra, my name is Tyler, and I would be honored if you took me in."
Lyra let out an ear piercing "Eeeeeee!" before turning around to face Twilight again. "I think I will take Tyler!".
"Well, go ahead and take him, just make sure that he gets along with your roommate just fine." said Twilight.
"I'm sure that she will adjust to this new change just fine!" said Lyra confidently as she took Tyler by the hand with her magic and led him out the door. I could see the most red of blushes upon his face as he was hauled out the door by his new teacher.
"Bye Tyler! We all yelled in unison as Twilight shut the door.
"Well guys, we should probably get you all to bed! We can go explore Ponyville some more tomorrow and hopefully get the other ponies to get used to your presence. I'll go upstairs and get you your sleeping bags." said Twilight as she ascended the stairs again.
I looked over to Mylan and Tony. "Well, I guess Tyler got his dream come true."
"It would appear to be that way. Did you see that blush on his face?! He looked like a ripened tomato!" said Tony. I couldn't help but laugh as Twilight came down the stairs with our sleeping bags.
"Here you go boys! I hope you sleep well tonight." said Twilight.
We all got into our bags, and it felt like bliss to me. The soft cushiony bag connected to my leg and felt very relaxing. I was finally able to sleep somewhere comfortable for once, so I was in heaven. I could really go for a shower right about now, but I didn't want to stress Twilight out anymore. Twilight started to walk upstairs again and turned her head towards us to look at us. "Good night guys!" she yelled as she used her magic to shut off all lights in the room.
"Goodnight Twilight!" We all yelled out before getting silent and ready to sleep. I had to admit that I had some fun today, but I still couldn't get the nagging feeling in my head that all of this peace was for real. I set that thought aside again and closed my eyes so I could fall asleep again. I slowly felt myself being pulled into sleep again, and this time it felt amazing.
Author's Note
This is where the story starts to get even more violent and sex filled. So as a warning, prepare.
Out With The Old and In With The New
I awoke in the middle of the night as I was roused out of my sleep by some un-relaxing sounds. I was still wrapped in my sleeping back, but I moved myself into a funny curled up position. I also managed to slither my way deeper into the bag, so I was completely covered. I held my breath and listened to find out what caused that noise. I heard some more noises more clearly this time, and then I heard voices. I could make out Twilight Sparkle's voice very clearly as I had gotten used to hearing it from last night.
I quietly crawled out of the sleeping bag with my arms emerging first, then my head, then the rest of my body. Once I emerged I felt the uncomfortable feeling of the cold air assaulting my body and giving me minor goosebumps. I never liked the cold, so it just made this experience even more miserable. I stood up fully, still clothed in just pants, and wondered what time at night it was. Before I could estimate I heard some more thumping noises from upstairs followed by Twilight's voice again. I could not make out what she was saying and I was getting more curious by the second.
I knew that it was wrong to impose on people's business (or in this case pony), but the curiosity was just too great. I walked towards the stairs and stopped at the bottom, giving myself another chance to just turn around and ignore it, but I couldn't. I slowly started to ascend the stairs on the balls of my feet to be more stealthy. I alternated between feet as I moved up the stairs, my five senses very acute, and reached the top.
I heard a light *creak* as I reached the top and stopped moving to listen. I picked up more sounds and thumping, so I figured that I did not compromise my awake presence. The sounds were much louder now that I was further upstairs, and was even surprised to find that the hallway was longer. This tree looked bigger on the inside than the outside! I continued to creep down the hallway while sticking to the shadows until I came across the room that the noise was stemming from. It was slightly open, so I decided to peek in. I tried to fit my eye through, but it did not fit, so I pushed the door open slightly with my right arm careful as to not make it creak. I felt the light of the room sting my left eye as I peeked through.
A disgusting sight ravaged my soul, and from this sight I immediately knew that Equestria was not pure. I observed Twilight Sparkle getting violated by something. I moved my eye slightly to the left and observed none other than he small dragon, Spike, delivering Twilight his mating appendage. I saw Spike thrusting his mating appendage into Twilight Sparkle's vagina, it leaking some nasty fluids all the way down Twilight's perineum and eventually dropping onto the bed sheets below. I started to grow angry as I heard the wet smack of Spike's stomach colliding with Twilight's rump, but I did nothing. I nearly threw up at that sound. I continued to look, and noticed that Twilight did not appear to enjoy this little romp at all. She looked like she was crying from shame, and it stung my heart.
Spike seemed to enjoy it. He slid his organ out of Twilight and walked over to her face, but when she refused to look up, Spike lifted her head up with his right claw and used his left claw to smack Twilight across the face. Hard. I heard the wet sound of his claw slashing Twilight's cheek, but I could not see the damage done. Without an exchange of words, Spike stuck his mating appendage into Twilight's mouth as forcefully and began to quickly thrust into Twilight's mouth. It wasn't long before I could hear a squishing sound coming from Twilight's face, and I concluded that Spike just ejaculated into the poor mare's mouth with his nasty dragon seed.
Before I had a chance to throw up due to my hatred of sex, I backpedalled away from the door and creeped back down the hall. I descended the stairs rather quickly as I did not want to get caught, and jumped into my sleeping bag. I climbed back in to my former position and curled up to sleep. It wasn't long before I was once again grabbed by sleep.
My eyes snapped open and was instantly afraid that I had been awoken by noises again, and yes I was. But this time I heard Mylan's voice so I assumed that it was morning and that it would be safe to get up. I started to crawl out of my sleeping bag cave and emerge to the cold air outside. I looked around but nobody was there, but were in the kitchen. I walked/stumbled into the kitchen which was connected to the living room. When I walked in I could smell the fresh scent of blueberry waffles, and coffee; and I could see my two human friends with Twilight sitting across from them. Spike was cooking the food over the counter to the left with a smile on his face as if nothing from last night ever occurred.
"Alexius! Come and sit. We were just about to talk about helping you humans fit into pony society!" said Twilight overly-happy as if nothing ever happened. Mylan and Tony were now looking at me, bidding me to take a seat. I casually walked/stumbled over to the seat right of Twilight and sat. I looked over to Twilight who looked surprised by how close I sat next to her, but did not say anything aloud. I was very surprised that there was no large scratch across Twilight's face from last-nights event. I just blamed it on magic and left it at that.
As if on cue to my arrival, Spike brought over five plates of food on a platter and set it on the table before picking up each plate and passing them out to each of us. I looked at my food and found it too look very inviting as I was quite hungry. I picked up the fork that was on my plate and stuck it into the whole pancake before lifting the whole thing up and taking quick bites out of it. I completely ignored my cutting knife. The waffles tasted like ordinary waffles from the supermarket, but the flavor was amplified eight-fold making it very delicious.
"Hey Spike, where did you get these waffles?" I ask.
"I made them myself using homemade ingredients."
"Wow, you must know how to cook pretty well huh?"
"You know it!" said Spike before he dug into his own plate. Spike sure did seem very nice, unless it was night time and he was raping Twilght. But his generosity with cooking me food and acting nice was not enough to make me forget the horror that I saw last night.
"Alright guys," said Twilight while chewing her food. "Today we have a tight schedule. First we are going to get all of you some new clothes from the Carousel Boutique, then we are going to go to the town hall so we can get you introduced to Ponyville, then finally we are going to return to the library so we can study for the rest of the day."
I did not like the sound of being introduced to the town at all. "Twilight, what do mean that we are going to get introduced to the whole town?"
"Exactly what it sounds like. The mayor is going to introduce you to all of Ponyville's inhabitants on stage. Is there something wrong?"
"Well kind of. You see, I have this little thing called stage-fright. I get especially scared when put up against a huge crowd."
"You sound so similar to Fluttershy! But don't worry, all each of you has to do is wave and smile." finished Twilight with a flick of her hoof.
"Oh. In that case I guess it's fine." I say. I look over to my friends and then Tony begins to talk.
"Will Tyler be there too?"
"Oh yes! I almost forgot that we also have to go and pick up Tyler from Lyra's apartment so he can tag along too." says Twilight. We all continued to scarf down our food with great hunger. I picked up a coffee cup from the food platter/tray (whatever the hell it's called) and drank it all quickly. It tasted like cinnamon and apples which was amazing. When we were all done eating, Spike snatched up our empty plates and cups so he could wash them. Mylan, Tony, Twilight, and I all stood up to continue our "tight schedule".
We all walked through the living room and to the front door where Twilight unlocked the door and we all strolled out. The sun was stinging my eyes and the weather was nice and warm. There were a few ponies outside the library and a couple were sitting down on the bench next to the library. Of course they booked it once they saw Mylan, Tony, and I.
"This way guys!" said Twilight happily prompting us to follow. I did not like to do this but I took a look at Twilight's nonexistent vagina. 'I swore that she had one last night, so where is it?!' I start silently demanding. This world makes no sense, so it's best not to prod the subject any longer.
We saw many more ponies along the way to the Carousel Boutique and almost all of them ran. The ones that didn't run were the only one's that cared to notice that Princess Twilight Sparkle was walking with us. Either that or they're smart enough to know that if we wanted to kill them then we would have at least tried it by now. Hell if I know.
We soon came across the marketplace again, and there were many ponies around doing random things. My eye caught sight of Applejack, and Applejack's big eye caught sight of mine, and she looked slightly mad. It was awkward, but Twilight Sparkle broke that when she walked over to greet her friend. Applejack appeared to immediately snap out of anger and continued talking to Twilight. We just stayed back as the center of attention for the ponies, but we just ignored all of the stares. All of the attention was enough to make a person like me go insane!
"Hey Alexius." said Mylan. "Can I ask you a question and get some advice?"
"Sure, what's on your mind?" I ask.
"In case you haven't noticed yet, Applejack is my favorite pony and I believe that she is best pony."
"Yeah so? Is that why you were acting all weird two days ago when we first encountered Applejack?"
"Yes. I was so excited at the time that I completely blew any chance of being able to live on Sweet Apple Acres with Applejack. I was wondering if you could give me any advice on being able mend the wound that I created between Applejack and I." said Mylan.
Without another word I raised my hand at Mylan to signal him to remain calm and walked over to Applejack and Twilight who were still talking about something. When I got close enough I saw Applejack giving me the stink-eye.
"Yes Alexius?" Asked Twilight as she cut her conversation with Applejack short.
"I need to talk to Applejack for a short while if that is okay with both of you."
"It's fine by me!" said Twilight as she turned to leave, leaving me alone with that psycho country mare. I looked Applejack in the eyes which started to narrow the more I waited.
"Well, whayyda want?" asked Applejack in a hiss.
"I was wondering if I could ever get you to forgive my big friend over there for freaking you out the first day we were on your nice farm." I say trying to sugarcoat my words.
"You varmints ate mah apples! Your big friend almost smothered me too! How can I forgive any of ya?!" said Applejack loudly.
"Well, my big friend Mylan was wondering if he could work on your farm to make up for the damage that we made. Is that okay?"
Applejack seemed to scratch her chin with the tip of her hoof and closing her eyes to think.
"You did knock me out too, so if you ever wanted to make it up to me for that, then this is your chance. You would if you have any honor." I say.
Applejack looked at me annoyed. "Of course we Apple's have honor! Fine! I'll let your friend work on mah farm! But just because I owe you one!"
"Thanks Applejack." I say as I turn around and leave. I could hear Applejack mumbling behind me as I left her apple stand.
"Are you ready to continue Alexius?" asks Twilight.
"Yes." I say aloud.
"Then let's get going. We don't want to waste too much time." says Twilight. As we continue to walk. Mylan looks at me wanting an answer for what I just did.
"What did you do Alexius?" asks Mylan with a hint of frustration in his voice.
"Oh me? I asked Applejack to let you work on her farm to make up for all of the chaos that we caused on her farm." I say. "So I guess that you can go whenever you feel like it."
"Wow, and you persuaded her that easily?"
"Yup. All you have to do now is butter Applejack up and you'll be living among her family in no time.".
We all continued to walk until we got to the Carousel Boutique. Fluttershy was right! It was the fanciest building that I've seen in this puny little town. It even slightly resembled a carousel due to its horse designs near the top of the building. And of course it was across a bridge just like Fluttershy described. There was no need for a bridge as there was no water, so it was just one of those dumb decorative bridges.
Twilight was first to head to the door of the Carousel Boutique and knocked on the door. "Just a minute!" yelled a voice from inside from whom I assumed was Rarity. I noticed that Tony was breathing hard. Weird. When the door finally swung open, that white unicorn with the purple hair that I saw earlier was standing there. She just looked at us a little bit strangely and in disgust by what we were weaing, or in my case, not wearing.
"Hello Rarity! I brought those guests that needed clothes!" said Twilight.
"Oh dear you should have come sooner!" said Rarity as she pulled us all in with her magic making us glow blue. When we were fully inside of the Carousel Boutique, I marveled at how nice it looked. The arches leading to the staircase were designed to look like wavy flowers, there were pony mannequins sitting about the walls, wardrobes that were blending in with the pink curtains in the wall, and there were mirrors and stands everywhere.
And of course there was a white Persian-looking cat taking a catnap in a cat bed near the staircase. No fancy house is complete without a fancy looking cat. Before I could continue to admire this nice house, Rarity started talking about how horrible our clothes looked.
"You're Mylan correct?" she asks Mylan.
"Yeah."
"Well no offense, but your daisy polo shirt looks like road-kill.
"Tony I believe, your jacket looks like..... um......is that me?" she asks with wide eyes.
"ummm, no. Although now that you mention it, it does look like you," lied Tony. I couldn't blame him, how else are you supposed to explain having a jacket that looks exactly like someone else? It's just awkward.
"Okay, now Alexius. Alexius is a nice name dear." says Rarity.
"Thank you very much Rarity. Your name is nice too."
"Thank you dear. The only clothes that you have on are pants, and those look horrendous. All of you have terrible clothes that you need to replace immediately. Twilight dear, this might take awhile, so you may want to entertain yourself.".
Rarity walked over to a cherry colored vanity that she had near one of her pony mannequins. She opened one of the drawers with her blue magic aura and levitated a several full spools out. Tony instantly seemed to know what they were and feigned interest. He ran over slid to a halt in front of the vanity looking at the spools. "OOOOOH is that silk?!".
Silk? That's almost too fancy. BUt who am I to argue with a genius of the cloth?
"Of course darling! I want your new clothes to be the best. You seem to know some basics of fashion Tony! I was always in need of a good assistant to help me with making clothes, but I was never able to get one except for my sister Sweetie Belle. She was never very good, so maybe you could become my new assistant. Interested?"
"Am I!" said Tony excitedly.
"Then you can come back to my boutique anytime you would like so we can begin. Now I must take measurements of each of you so I may make your clothes, so come step up on my measuring station." said Rarity as she pointed at the station. I walked over first so I could get measured. Rarity followed me over and pulled out a roll of measuring tape to get my lengths. First she measured my legs, then my torso up to my head, then the length of my arms. She finally measured the circumference of my waist, which did not feel comfortable because the cold metal was rubbing up against my bare skin.
"Alright Alexius, you're done."
"Thank you Rarity. You must be very generous to waist precious silk on us."
"You have no idea darling!" Rarity says with a smile.
After my measurements I went to go sit down on Rarity's couch and just watch. Eventually I became tired and almost fell asleep from how tired I was. I looked over to Twilight who was laying on Rarity's floor twiddling her hooves probably thinking about last night. I shuddered at that memory and was surprised at just how easily I forgot about that nastiness. Eventually Rarity got Mylan's height which was kind of funny because she would have to use more silk to create his clothes. Much more silk.
Eventually Rarity was done taking measurements and bid us farewell as Twilight lead the way out the door. "I'll have your new clothes done for you boys done by the end of the day free of charge!"
"Thank you Rarity! I really appreciate it!" yelled Twilight.
"Thank you!" We all yelled as we left which reminded me of when I was a kid always getting forced to say thank you to people. Once Rarity closed her door and we were moving on, I asked Twilight where we were going next.
"Twilight, where to next?"
"Now I think that we should get Tyler to join us so we can do the introduction to the town. You all go ahead and find the town hall while I retrieve Tyler." said Twilight while leaving without saying another word. Then she called out, "IT's the big building with a spire!"
It did not matter what she said because my two brony friends probably knew exactly what it looked like. "Where is it anyway?" I ask.
"I think that it's this way. Well know when we see it." said Mylan.
And so we walked. We were getting hungry again, but there was no time to dilly dally. Besides, the ponies wouldn't sell us anything anyway. They were all too scared. There were ponies wandering on the streets every now and then but none of them stood around too long after taking a good look at us.
We eventually came across the town hall, and Mylan gave me the heads up. It was quite large and circular, There was a medium sized stage near the entrance to the town hall with a big banner stretching above reading: "Come and meet Ponyville's first Humans!" in big red text that was all capital letters. Unsurprisingly, there was nopony waiting for it, only one grey pegasus with blonde hair sitting next to a red paint bucket besides the stage.
We all continued our stroll to the front door to the town hall and walked in to encounter a mare with glasses reading a book. She shot up when she saw us and looked like she wanted nothing to do with us. "The Mayor is upstairs through the very last door."
"Thank you." I say as I walk upstairs with Tony and Mylan following. It was a chore walking up those stairs, but we finally reached the door and walked in. The mayor was sitting behind a desk cluttered with paper, and by the looks of her nameplate, her name was Mayor Mare. She had a grey mane and wore a collar with a tuft of green fur on it. Her eyes were blue and she wore glasses which made her look more intelligent.
Mayor Mare looked up and sighed. "Looks like your little presentation is off humans. It was a flop as nopony showed up you see, so I suggest you leave my office and find something else to do."
We were all taken aback by her mood and tone, and decided to leave without another word. My friends looked like they did not want to present, and I certainly did not want to do to my stage fright. So we left. We walked back down the stairs in a slump. We did not want to argue with a rude mayor whose name was Mayor Mare.
"What should we tell Twilight?" asked Tony.
"Let's just tell her that it is off and hopefully she stay calm. If she gets mad then we could just tell her that we would be happy to study again. That would certainly bring her spirits up!" said Mylan.
We all started to talk once we reached the outside about what we were planning to do.
"I think that I am going to go straight to Applejack's farm after this. I don't want to learn about Equestria because I already know pretty much everything." said Mylan.
"And I think that I will be going to Rarity's afterwards to spend time with her. She is my favorite pony after all!" said Tony.
"That's a no-brainer." I say.
"What about you Alexius? what do you plan to do?" asks Tony in a sassy voice.
"I guess I'll just stay with Twilight. It's not like I have anything else to do. Learning about Equestria will we a good thing for me."
We all turned our heads to an approaching Twilight and Tyler once we heard footsteps. "Were back! Where is everypony?"
"The thing is off Twilight." I say with a swish of my hands. Nopony was interested in meeting us, but would rather just avoid us."
"That can't be! I spent at least two hours trying to arrange this meeting, and now it's all off?! I could have spent that time doing something useful!!' yelled Twilight angrily. She then started to stomp towards the town hall to have a word, but Mylan stopped her with his leg.
"No need Twilight, we didn't want to do this anyway. We discussed it ourselves. "
"To be honest, I didn't want to do it either." said Tyler.
Twilight spun around and looked suspiciously at us half lidded. "But why?"
"I'm afraid, Mylan and Tony don't care for it and neither does Tyler apparently. Speaking of Tyler, how has Lyra been treating you?" I say.
"It's been great..." said Tyler with a blush.
'OH...MY...GAWD. Tyler didn't. Very well, I will have to deal with this later. I could be wrong, but damn, he better hope so.'
"Fine boys, we'll just go home and study some more." says Twilight a little more happily.
"I don't think so Twilight." said Mylan. "I plan to head to Applejack's to make up for the damage we caused.
"Oh, well that is very responsible of you! Come alo-"
"I think I'll be heading to Rarity's so I can learn about making clothes. I'll even deliver the clothes she made to you guys later." said Tony. The making clothes part was an obvious lie.
"Then I guess it is just me and Alexius then. You can come along too if you would like to Tyler."
"Not to be rude, but nah." said Tyler. It was still rude in my eyes.
"Very well then. Farewell. I guess I will see you all later then." said Twilight.
They all went there separate ways with a bye. I waved back at them and so did Twilight. I guess now I had to deal with pony discrimination on my own now. Twilight and I turned to leave, and I thought to myself. I hope Mylan is okay at Applejack's farm, and that Tony doesn't become too creepy around Rarity. Tyler obviously did something with Lyra, and I had a creeping suspicion of what it was. I decided to ask Twilight about him.
"So Twilight, what was the deal with Tyler. He wasn't too hard to find was he?"
"Not at all. It seems that Bonbon kicked Lyra out of her apartment and sent her and Tyler out on their own, so I had to go and find their new apartment at an inn." said Twilight.
"And what inn might that be?" I asked.
"It was the Green Leaf Inn, but they don't plan to stay there for long as it is just a temporary living space."
"I'll keep that in mind..." I say.
Twilight and I eventually arrived back at the library and we both slumped down on the couch, tired from such a pointless trip. Spike was nowhere to be found, but there was an owl sitting up on one of the bookshelves. It looked at me funny, but then it lost interest and fell asleep.
"That's my owl, Owlicious. Both he and Spike act as my apprentices and help around the library."
"You trained your owl to do chores?" I ask amazed.
"Well, he was already quite trained, I just introduced him to my library and the rest is history. But enough about Owlicious, it is time to study about the many other races inside and outside of Equestria."
"Oh boy." I say. "Race war!"
"What was that?"
"Nothing."
I learned that there were many other races in Equestria. Some were intimidating and others not so much. There were minotaurs, changelings, dragons, donkeys, buffalo, zebra, breezies, cows?!, diamond dogs, gremlins, gargoyles, centaurs, and the list goes on. Dragons were obvious due to Spike's presence. Changelings were weird insectoids that stole emotions and lived in a hive much like the aliens from AVP. Breezies were little insect ponies that used the wind to use magic and travel around. One race that caught my attention were the griphons. I always thought griphons were cool creatures, but now they're real?! According to Twilight, the tribes of griphons in the mountains are to be avoided at all times.
Twilight also taught me about the draconequus, but there was only one draconequus to knowledge. That was the master of Chaos himself, Discord. She taught me about what he could accomplish with his magic, and how he was reformed by none other than Fluttershy herself. Unfortunately he left and now lives in Canterlot castle. I definitely would not mind having his powers.
Now that my lesson was over, Twilight said that I could do whatever I wanted for the rest of the day, so I decided to put the rest of the day to investigate that little scene I witnessed last night. Perhaps Twilight had a diary, and maybe she writes about that kind of experience all the time. It certainly could not be the first time right?
"Hey Twilight, can I use the restroom?" I ask.
Twilight looked up from her book while lying on the couch. "Of course. It is the first door to your left upstairs."
'Perfect'
I leave without another word and head upstairs to the bathroom. In truth I really needed to use the bathroom. It would be the first time ever since I arrived in Equestria. So I used the bathroom and washed my hands with some fruity smelling soap. I had to plan the next part out carefully so I would not get caught. Spike was most likely somewhere upstairs, so I had to be quiet.
I pulled off my shoes but left off my socks so I could be sneaky. I slowly opened the bathroom door, happy to say that there was no creaking, and took soft steps down the hall. I remembered that the room from last night was the third door on the left. I slowly creeped further down the hall until I reached the door. I slowly pushed the door open to make sure Spike wasn't in there and was relieved to see nothing moving around. I pushed the door open enough so I could slide in and I did quietly like an amateur ninja. Once inside, I noticed that the room was very bland. I walked over to the bed and lifted the blanket, and saw a bunch of stain marks from none other than the dragon himself. It almost made me throw up, but I swallowed it and looked around for a diary.
I tried the the vanity's droors, but nothing came up. I then looked underneath the bed, but there was nothing there but empty carpet. I tried out the pillow and underneath the pillow, but there was still nothing.
'Maybe she doesn't have one?'
I looked over to the curtains and the window and saw something behind them blocking out the sunlight coming in. Before I was able to get close enough to check, I heard footsteps coming down the hall. I immediately leaped and did a roll underneath Twilight's bed. The door to the bedroom opened all the way and Twilight walked in. I held my breath and did not move until Twilight left. She carried something out with her, and I hoped that it wasn't the diary. Once the door was shut all the way, I rolled out and got up silently, and looked towards my goal. It was still there to my relief, so I pulled it out from behind the red curtain and went back under the bed with it so I would not get caught.
The front of the book read, "Twilight Sparkle's Diary". I opened to the latest entry, which just so happened to be from last night. and so it read:
Whatever the date was, I did not understand the Equestrian calendar
Today I was unsurprisingly taken advantage of Spike again. I should just stop talking about that because I hate to think about it. This night he sliced my face, and I had to heal it with some special elixir that I purchased from Zecora many weeks ago. I don't know how long it will be before I finally snap at Spike, but I can feel it coming. In better new, the humans that I recovered yesterday have finally awoken and I decided to take in three of them to teach. Lyra the unicorn stopped by and took one of them off of my hands. Tomorrow I will try and introduce them to the town, and maybe ponies will stop being such xenophobes afterwards. One can only hope.
I closed the diary. So Spike really was doing this against Twilight's will? I did not like sex in general, but when it is forced, I become very angry. I rolled out as quickly as I could and put the diary back where it was supposed to be. I moved over to the door to leave as quickly as possible. Luckily, nothing was in the hallway when I departed. Twilight will have to be avenged for this.
