La vie est drôle!

La vie est drôle!

Chapter Two

Written by Harime Nui

“H-how did…”

“I don’t know, Rainbow Dash, but Princess Luna looks mad…” Twilight pointed out, seeing that Luna was giving flashes of red in her mane.

“How dare you!” exclaimed the stunned alicorn of the night, her mane seemingly becoming a raging fire for a split second. Without a second thought, she took to the air and flew right at Nui, intent on avenging her fallen guard. Just as she reached the pig-tailed girl, however, Nui turned around and threw her arms forward, grabbing Luna’s hooves in her hands. As the two struggled to move against one another, Nui let out another giggle.

“This is fun!”

“You… like fighting?”

“I prefer to use the word ‘playing’, but yeah! What’s life without a fight every now and then?” Nui asked rhetorically, slowly lifting her arms upwards until Luna was above her. Then, to Luna’s shock, she let go. Instead of crashing into Nui, though, the alicorn plummeted straight into the ground. As she shook her head to get herself out of the funk she found herself in, her vision was shrouded by a shadow.

“I suppose you think that was funny,” she stated dryly to the girl in front of her, who responded with yet another giggle. “Well, I hope you’re ready for round two,” she continued, slowly lifting herself off of the ground.

“What do you think she’s gonna do, Twilight?”

“I’m not sure, Rainbow, but it might be best if we move away a bit.”

“Yeah, good call,” Dash agreed, looking at the area around them. With debris everywhere, it was basically a hazard just to walk around, let alone be near a fight that involved a pissed off alicorn. As she and Twilight began to walk away, she looked back at Luna, who was back on her feet.

“This time, you won’t have such an easy time blocking my attack!” exclaimed Luna as she aimed her horn towards the skinny girl in front of her. That pink dress of hers was about to be reduced to ash with the rest of her. Nui watched uninterestedly as a blue light formed on the tip of Luna’s horn, even going as far as to yawn, only causing the alicorn to get even angrier.

“Take this, you pink she-demon!”

With the force of a cannon, Luna fired the ball of magic at the blonde girl, her eyes glazing over white in the process. Nui, having finally taken notice of the power behind Luna’s attack, had no time to dodge. As the ball struck her stomach, an immense pain overtook her. If she didn’t do something to stop this attack, it could be the end for her. And so, she did what she had done to that green haired fellow at Honnouji.

“W-what?! But, but how!” was all Luna could sputter out as she watched Nui seemingly turn paper thin and spin away from the ball of magic, which continued on its course. The building it struck was overtaken by a blinding flash of light, and as it faded away, nothing was left of it but ash.

Nui, meanwhile, seemed to be whole again, and Luna could do nothing but ask, “how did you do that?!”

“Uh uh uh, a girl never shares her secrets on the first date!” Nui exclaimed, winking at Luna.

“Twilight,” Luna yelled at the purple unicorn who had taken cover in a nearby alleyway, “take Swift Wing to the nearest hospital while I deal with this girl.”

“But Princess, you can’t possibly handle this by yourself!” Twilight shouted back at Luna.

“Twilight, you would do nothing more than get yourself hurt, now go,” the night princess replied calmly.

Letting out a sigh, she realized that Luna was probably right. There was no point in entering a fight she had no chance in. Quickly, Twilight teleported herself to the aforementioned guard. Scanning over his body, she saw no signs of anything serious, but it was very possible that he had suffered internal damage. Carefully, she lifted him up with her magic and teleported away, leaving a pissed off alicorn, a seemingly very promiscuous girl, and one Rainbow Dash.

“Kick her butt, Luna! Show her what for!” yelled said rainbow maned pony from the alleyway.

“I probably shouldn’t use this next technique, but I have been saving it for a situation just like this one,” Luna stated to herself, looking at the ground. After a couple seconds, she looked back up at Nui. Never before had she encountered a creature like this one. She seemed so naive and innocent, but she was as skilled at fighting as anyone Luna had ever seen.

Nui’s smile grew a bit at Luna’s words, but she didn’t respond. Rather, she waited for Luna to make her first move. And make her first move she did, only this time, Nui was unable to track her movement. So quick Luna had moved, that when she reappeared in front of Nui, the blonde girl had a look of horror on her face. Flapping her wings to stay off the ground, Luna smirked and threw her hoof forward, connecting it with Nui’s jaw. She was sent flying, but Luna didn’t relent one bit.

“Now fall to my Shooting Star Technique!”

As Nui flew through the air, she couldn’t help but wonder what the indigo pony meant. That is, until she glanced up and found herself looking right at said pony. Using her front hooves, Luna slammed Nui downwards, then back up again just as quickly. Her movements were too quick for Nui to defend against, and as the blonde girl was being thrown around, all she could think of was how she was going to make this horse pay dearly.

Eventually, after having smacked Nui around for what felt like minutes, Luna decided it was time to wrap things up. After hitting Nui one more time, she took to the air, hovering about twenty feet above the girl. Finally, Nui was able to see the pony once more, and her happy grin had been replaced entirely by a scowl the likes of which Luna hadn’t seen since Sombra.

“You’re mine, Harime!”

As Luna began flying down at Nui, the blonde girl’s scowl transformed into a smirk. As Luna reached her and was preparing to unleash a devastating blast of magic at point blank range, Nui laughed madly. Before she could react, Luna found herself flying away from the girl and smashing into the same crater she had made upon arriving on the planet.

“I don’t like to get my parasol dirty, but you left me no choice!”

Luna, unshaken by the impact, blinked confusedly at Nui. She had been smacked away by an… umbrella? That was most definitely a new one. “So, you still have some fight left in you,” she remarked, raising back onto her hooves. This one was certainly an interesting foe. But hey, Luna wasn’t complaining. It had been a while since she had been able to let loose and have a real battle like this, after all.

“See, you’re having fun, too!” Nui happily informed Luna, to which the alicorn smirked.

“Maybe so, but I fight for good, not for fun. Now show me what you’ve got…”

“Nope, I’m done!”

“W-what?” Luna muttered. “What do you mean you’re done?!”

“Yeah, you can’t stop the fight just because she started wailing on you!” Rainbow Dash yelled angrily from the sidelines.

“I just want to have fun,” Nui responded, sounding a little sad.

“B-but I thought you said you found fighting fun?”

“I do, but now I’m bored,” she replied boredly. “You’re boring.”

“But it was just starting to get interesting!” Luna yelled back in response. Rainbow Dash, unwilling to sit idly any longer, surprised both Nui and Luna by flying at the prior. Nui, however, moved slightly to the left, causing Rainbow Dash to fly right past her and head first into the building behind her.

“Ow…”

“That is enough!”

Shocked at hearing that voice, Luna  looked around for the source. After a couple seconds, she found it. As the pony above her began lowering towards the ground in between herself and Nui, Luna let out a sigh. It looked like her fun was over.

As the solar princess’s hooves touched the ground, she addressed her sister without turning her head in the slightest, instead focused on the girl in front of her. “When someone says they are done fighting, they are done fighting, Luna.”

Not giving a chance for Luna to respond, Celestia began speaking to the girl in front of her.  “And you, have done nothing but cause trouble since you arrived in my kingdom. What do you have to say for yourself?”

“It was all in good fun!”

“All in good fun? Look around you. This area of my city lay in ruins, all because you wanted to have ‘fun’?” Celestia asked, her mask of niceness having been removed. In its place was a face filled with anger.

“Be wary, sister,” Luna began warning Celestia, “this one is much like Discord.”

“Yeah, and she’s a real jerk, too!” Rainbow Dash yelled from the sidelines, her first words since she crashed.

“Nui, is it?” Celestia asked the girl in front of her, trying to calm down a bit in the process.

“Mhm!”

“Nui, you have five seconds to apologize before I bring down the wrath of the Sun upon you.”

“But why should I apologize when they started it?”

“WHAT’S THAT, YOU DEMON?!” Luna angrily yelled from behind Celestia, only to be hushed by her.

“Luna, hush. Explain, now,” she ordered Nui.

“Well, when I landed, that horsie over there started talking to me and I called her silly, then this other pony got mad at me and said ‘you will show her respect’,” Nui began explaining, doing a nearly perfect impression of Swift Wing in the process.

“Then what happened, Nui?”

“I said no, and he got mad and charged at me, so I flicked him away!”

“Is this true, Luna?” Celestia asked her sister, who tried to sputter out an excuse, only for Celestia to assert herself, “Luna, is what this girl said true or not?”

“Ahem, um, yes. But she disrespected not only myself, but a royal guard!”

Letting out a sigh, Celestia facehoofed. “You can’t attack someone for being ‘disrespectful’, Luna.”

“But she attacked Swift Wing!” Luna yelled in response, to which Celestia shook her head.

“If what this girl said is to be believed, and you confirmed it, it was in self defense.”

“YOU CAN’T BE SERIOUS, SISTER!”

“Very. We have laws here for a reason, and Swift Wing violated one when he chose to rush at someone who has every right to voice their opinion,” Celestia explained, causing Luna to curse under her breath. “But… I think being knocked out by a flick to the nose was punishment enough for your Lieutenant.”

At that, Luna let out a sigh of relief, but that relief was quickly shattered by Celestia’s next words.

“You, on the other hand, can consider yourself grounded.”

“You can NOT be serious, sister. Seriously, you can not be serious right now.”

“Would you rather spend a night in the dungeons, Luna?”

Luna’s eyes widened at the mention of that accursed place, and she took to the air and began flying to the castle in an instant. “Okay, see you Nui it was fun we’ll continue this never!”

“Now, as for you…” Celestia began, looking back towards Nui.

“Are you going to fight me now? Oh, that would simply be amazing!”

“No, but you’re going to come back to the castle with me. I’d like to have a word with you, in private.”

“Aww, that sounds boring! For colorful horsies, you guys sure aren’t much fun...”

“Tough,” Celestia retorted. It had been a while since she had acted this way. The kind, calm princess that everyone knew was gone for the moment, replaced by a determined, upset one. Without uttering another word, she teleported both herself and Nui away in a flash of light, leaving just one pony at the site of the battle.

As Rainbow Dash let out a frustrated sigh and took to the air, she thought to herself. Boy, was she going to have quite the story for the others...