(Note: Sung to the tune of The Little Mermaid's "Under The Sea")

Sung by Twilight Sparkle

Tasked with harvesting apples from the entirety of Sweet Apple Acres until Big Macintosh's back recovered, Applejack went several days without sleep. It eventually got so bad that she didn't even realise what sort of trees she was trying to get apples from.

Twilight had to step in and explain to Applejack that the tree that she was bucking was no more. It had ceased to be. It had expired and had gone to meet its maker. It was a husk bereft of life that had run down the curtain and joined the choir invisible.

This was an ex-tree.

You’re kicking a load of timber
Fit only for firewood
I know your brother’s back’s not limber
For your sake and own good
Go take a break or get help now
You don’t even notice that
The tree that you’re kicking is dead now
Any second you could fall flat

Bucking that tree
Bucking that tree
Clear in my eyes it’s
Pointless exercises
Take it from me
You haven’t slept for several days
Out in the sun you’ve slaved away
I know you’re horsin’
Around exhaustin’
Bucking that tree

That thing’s a husk lacking life there
It’s past it, its glory days gone
It’s not bearing any fruit, mare
There’s no point kicking that one
What will it take to make you believe?
It’s as dead as dead can get
The first clue is that it’s got no leaves
You’re pointlessly working a sweat
Oh no!

Bucking that tree
Bucking that tree
That plant’s expired
I’m not a liar
It’s ceased to be
It’s joined the choir invisible
Spare you the feeling miserable
Don’t spend durations
Venting frustrations
Bucking that tree
Bucking that tree

You’re losing sleep here
You got to be here
Naturally
You’re just kicking a lifeless husk
You can’t kick the trunk from dawn to dusk
That’s just insane, just
Spare yourself pain of
Bucking that tree!

It’s dead, go to bed!
No more, that’s for sure!
A stiff, don’t say “if”
Just don’t kick anymore
That stump is a dump
It’s died, dunno why
Don’t waste what’s left of your sense!
Of life, it’s bereft
That thing’s given out
I’m sure it’s no more
It’s passed on, no doubt
Don’t add to the warps
Of that wooden corpse!
I speak with no offense

Bucking that tree
Bucking that tree
Down in the bog there
It’s popped its clogs there
That I can see
It’s shuffled off its mortal coil
It’s stopped depending on the soil

Its bucket’s kicked, so quit? I should think so
Bucking that tree
That trunk’s a bust there, stopping’s a must there
Bucking that tree
Pull up a bed and rest up your head, and
Point that I’m making, you’re undertaking
A pointless job now, just quit and stop now
Bucking that tree!

Applejack turned to look at the tree she was fruitlessly trying to harvest fruit from.

"Ah knew that," was the reply.

Author's Note

Nine...