Marvelous Equestria Adventures

The Wooden Monstrosity was getting nearer.

Past Light could feel it.

He had been flying at top speed for 15 minutes now and his wings were beginning to cramp up. But he had to keep going. Just a little farther…..Suddenly the worst happened; Past’s wings involuntarily folded into his body. The now flightless pegasus fell to the ground as the monster pounced…

“Move it, kid!” The fruit pony glared at the tan-coated pegasus blocking his path for the umpteenth time. Impatiently, the seller dug his hooves into the ground. If the kid didn’t move soon, he’d be late again to the market. Thankfully, the colt got up and trotted off, presumably to one of the “popular places”. The seller anxiously checked the time, and sighed with relief. He still had time to get to his stall.

Past slumped disappointedly towards Sugar Cube Corner. Once again, he’d failed to make it all the way from his house to the “store of sweetness”, and his time had even gone up. His cousin Rainbow Dash had made it the same distance in 15 seconds, and her wings hadn’t stopped working. And to top it all off, he was probably late for the pre-training snack. Dejected, he walked slowly towards the counter. He looked up to place his order, and instantly cheered up. His best friend, Lost Control, was ponying the register.

Lost Control was a sky-blue coated unicorn with a curly red mane. He was as good at magic as Princess Twilight had been at that age, but magic didn’t seem to be his niche. Instead, his flank was adorned with an erratic spiral as his cutie mark, symbolizing his talent of complete and utter randomness.

“Hey there, Past!” Lost said. He was bouncing around the register in no particular pattern. Lost had gotten many of the traits his sister Pinkie Pie carried, including a mild case of ADHD. Past smiled as he tried to decide what to order. As always, there was a veritable encyclopedia of sugar filled treats. Lost noticed his friend’s indecisive glancing and offered a suggestion.

“Try these, Buddy!” Lost waved a tray of cupcakes in Past’s face. “They just came in today!”

“Okay,” Past took a cupcake off the tray (with much difficulty, I might add) and inspected it. The cupcake itself was cyanish, with a colorful swirl of various frostings adorning the top. It reminded Past of someone, but he wasn’t sure who. Tentatively, Past took a bite of the pastry, and his face lit up with pleasure. In a few seconds, Past had downed the entire dessert. “Wow, these are really good!” Past exclaimed.

“I knew you’d like it. Wanna know what we’re calling it?” Lost asked.

“Sure,” Past answered.

“The Rainbow Dash!”

“The what?”

“The Rainbow Dash!”

Past suddenly realized that Rainbow Dash wasn’t there yet. It was unlike her to be so late, especially when she was meeting Past. Nervously, he asked, “A-Are you saying anything else besides the name?”

“Yup, the tagline. ‘Comes from the real Rainbow Dash!’ Pretty good, right? Past? Past, why are you on the floor?”

Past’s suspicions had culminated at the word “Rainbow”. He now realized that his cousin had most likely been transformed into a batch of cupcakes. Here is a complete record of his thoughts from the spark of epiphany to his meeting with the floor of Sugar Cube Corner.

They turned my cousin into cupcakes!

Lost is a psychopath.

I wonder if Miss Pinkie helped.

Oh my Celestia, this is just like that fanfic I read on the Hoofernet.

Why is the ground rushing toward me?

Past then blacked out due to his head hitting the floor.

The pegasus woke up in a hospital bed. He heard the steady beep of the heart rate monitor as his heart beat in a relaxed rhythm. Past turned his head slightly and found himself staring into the green eyes of Lost Control. “Nice to see you’re awake, Past!” the now suspicious unicorn peppily pronounced. “You want a cupcake?” Lost levitated a cupcake with yellow frosting and slightly orange cake. “We’re calling this one the Applejack!”

“Enough!” Past yelled, knocking the “Applejack” out of Lost’s field of magic. “What’s with all the weird cupcakes?! First you give me a cupcake that looks like Rainbow Dash, and now this? Explain to me, Lost, what is going on?” Suddenly, a cyan pegasus burst into the room. It was none other than Rainbow Dash!

“Past, what’s wrong? You ate the cupcake I made and then flipped out. Are you okay?”

Past looked sheepishly at the two ponies as the cupcake he’d hit detached from the ceiling where it had stuck and fell onto the head of a nurse who had just walked in. “I, uh, kinda thought you were the cupcake.”

“Why in Equestria would you think that, Past?” Rainbow asked.

“I don’t know. I read a fanfic where Pinkie killed you violently and made you into cupcakes, so I let my imagination run away with me, I guess,” Past admitted.

“Well, don’t read those stories again, okay?” Rainbow said.

“Okay,” Past replied.

Satisfied, Rainbow exited the room. Past turned toward Lost, who was walking towards the window. “How long was I out?” he questioned.

“About two weeks,” Lost said casually, now directly in front of the window.

“Two weeks?” Past yelled, stunned.

“Ee-yup.” Lost said just before he crashed out the 30th story window.