After getting into yet another fight with Twilight, Spike takes a walk around Ponyville to cool off and visit his friends. A crappy day ensues consisted of taking self-inventory, reminiscing, pitying himself, binge-eating bear claws, getting chased by a dog, getting chased by bullies, getting chased by a lunatic with a stapler, waxing philosophically with a wino, ineffectually fantasizing about Rarity, and various other boundlessly fascinating scenarios that make for an incomparably superb piece of literature that rivals even the likes of Plato's Republic in how simply magnificent and not at all boring it is. If you have a fondness for stories that consist exclusively of vulgar, sophomoric banalities masquerading as "humor", then this ham-fisted bullshit is for you, my friend!

And if you don't happen to like (for reasons I can't even begin to possibly imagine) my whimsical literary style in which I wantonly type about whatever errant delusion comes to mind like a chimpanzee flinging it's poop at a computer screen, then you can just go fellate a mountain goat, buddy!

[Pro tip]: Don't use your teeth. They hate that.

This story is a tie-in to Fractures.