Swimmingly's Abomonation

Revenge of Renboo the Wise.

The sunny sky was being annoying  and fat to all the ponies in Ponyville. The only sound was that of bottles and trash being throw at the luminous faggot in the sky. The swag sales pony had just arrived, he was wearing his anti-sunbeingafaggot-shades.

All the ponies wandered around looking at his ware. Singular.

He only sold obey shirts.

In the distance Renboo the white watched with disgust, she saw all of the shirts with weed or derogatory phrases on them, all the hats with weed on them, and even some already wearing obey merch.

She knew that something had to be done, and no one but she was capable. She must stop the SWAGAPOCALYPSE!

MEANWHILE

Twilight potter and frodo-shy were having some lunch at the local swag-Donald's, both wearing obey shirts and dope hats. On a normal day they may have been ridiculed for their stupid hats but today they weren't.

Everyone was wearing them.

"Gee Frodo-Shy I sure hope we can gather all the horcruxes so we can get into doom mountain and destroy the one ring before the empire takes over" Twilight potter said through a mouthful.

"Me to, but I miss...um Spikewise he and me shared many meaningful moments" Frodo-Shy reminisced.

Just then rainbow skywalker and applejack sparrow wondered by.

"Look Applejack more traitors to the non-named after a fantasy novel/movie character clan" seethed Rainbow skywalker.

Applejack sparrow "hmmphd" with disgust.

And with that they were gone.

MEANWHILE

The skies cracked and split with lightning as the wind howled.

A noise louder than sound.

Then nothing.

In the midst of the turmoil blast marks from lighting strikes covered the flat ground.

A body lay in the untouched centre.

Special Agent. Dale Cooper.

Pinkie Bateman and Rarity Scherbatsky were off in a field, they were romancipating.

They were doing that gross thing that no-one likes were you shovel cake into the others face.

No sooner had pinkie broken of her piece that a bulldozer came seemingly out of nowhere and killed them both.