Trixie Writes Hatemail

Dear Granny Smith,

How old are you? Honestly, how are you not dead yet? I bet Princess Celestia is considered young compared to your age. I've always wondered what that odd smell was around Sweet Apple Acres, but I think I know now, it's you, rotting of old age. Every time you fall asleep, I bet your family organises a funeral because they know you're not far off from dying. So you and your family founded Ponyville when you were just a filly? I doubt it for a few reasons. One, Ponyville was founded over one hundred years ago, I know your old and your wrinkles are a mile long, but I doubt that you are over one hundred years old. Two, if you and your family founded Ponyville and you are the oldest generation of your family, wouldn't that make you mayor? There for, in my conclusion, you are a lying, old, hag who should be shot for being a zombie.

Tonnes of hate, from an anonymous pony.