Luna Versus Stairs

Luna was acting like a total dorkazoid and just throwing her hooves every which way and that in absolute fury.

“What the hay is this? Who is the foolish mortal who dares to obstruct my path with this abomination of architecture? I swear, if I find the pony responsible I shall not be held accountable for my actions! This was not a nice thing to do!”

Still at the top of the stairs, she leaned in close as though to whisper to the stairs themselves. It was the loudest whisper ever.

“I hate thou! You know that musician you like?” Surprisingly, the stairs didn’t answer. “Well I hate them too! That’s right, I hate thou, and I hate all the bands thou liketh!” She still didn’t get a single response from this strange thing. “Why won’t you die?”

She was super frustrated. The feelings of being under appreciated? She got over that. Discord? He went down like a bag of hammers. Sombra? Defeated by spousal abuse, she could take him any day! But this thing before her was a foe the likes of which she never knew before. But now she knows, and knowing is half the battle.

And so she took a few deep breaths. What was she stressing out over? After all, it’s not like she had to climb down them, as complicated as that process would be. Why risk breaking her neck when she could just swoop down from above like the princess she was. At this resolve, she flared out her wings, bent her knees, and got ready to conquer this evil chump.

Celestia came up from behind and whapped Luna on the head with a rolled up newspaper. “Luna, no. You’re old enough to know not to fly in the castle.”

Luna held her brains in from that devastating blow to her skull. “Well how else am I to descend? This monstrosity is absolutely impossible to traverse!”

Celestia walked down a couple of steps. “Sister, you are over-reacting. It’s completely safe, see?”

Luna saw that her sister was not exploding into a million pieces as she thought would happen, and so it seemed safe enough. So with this comforting thought she carefully touched one hoof to the next step, barely though lest these happen to be poisoned. She then withdrew it, given that it was probably a trap laid out by her sister. “What even are these? I don’t recall this thing being here!”

Celestia tilted her head in confusion at this. “Luna, these are stairs. Why are you acting so surprised?”

“Because back in my day we didn’t have stairs! We had rocks. Who even put in this alleged ‘stairs’ anyway? What pony in their right mind would conceive of such an absurd device?”

Celestia masked a grin with one hoof as she raised the other, like a child in a classroom. Luna knew who her nemesis was.

“You!” Luna flared up. She was madder than a hatter. Interpret that however you may, because you may be correct. “I swear, I am going to come down there and. . . “ She trailed off, remembering that the only thing between her sister was the stairs. She would never reach her sister to follow through with a threat.

Celestia was only too glad to take advantage of this fact and went down to the bottom floor, taking two steps at a time like a jovial little schoolfilly. “You’re going to have to catch me first, sister!”