Doctor Rainbow

He could still smell the wretched stench of gutted ponies and blood. Reluctantly, he opened his eyes and rubbed the gunk out of them. He focused and stared straight into the face of a gray mare.

"Augh!" he screamed, but then realized that it was just Derpy. "Derpy, you dolt!" he scolded.

"Hey!" she said, offended.

"Oh, sorry. Actually, I'm glad you woke me up. I had a terrible nightmare about rainbows. Now isn't that just absolutely ridiculous?" he said.

"Uh, yeah! Princess Luna must be going crazy... I had a nightmare too!" Derpy replied.

"Princess Lu- oh, yeah. I still don't understand the Equestrian society much," he told her.

"So, muffins for breakfast? Would you prefer blueberry muffins, coffee muffins or the pecan muffins? As you know, I can make you any kind of muffin like maybe pumpkin muffins or I can make you more blueberry muffins because I know you like those or maybe chocolate chip muffins? Do you want butter too, because I really don't recommend the butter with the chocolate chip muffins because I don't personally like the butter with the chocolate chip muffins but I like it with the blueberry muffins because the butter with the blueberry muffins is really good so do you want the blueberry muffins with the butter or not because I really think they're good so have you chosen yet?" Derpy asked, not showing any signs of need of breath.

"Derpy, slow down for a second and breathe!" yelled the Doctor. "And yes, I would like the butter with the blueberry muffins."

At breakfast, Derpy and the Doctor were calmly eating, the Doctor with blueberry muffins with butter and Derpy with the same. The Doctor was just about to swallow a mouthful of muffin when suddenly, Derpy asked "Doctor, what was your dream really about, like in detail?" There was an awkward silence, and then the Doctor started choking on his muffin and Derpy had to slap him on the back several times before he could talk.

"Um, Derpy, I'd rather not talk about it right now. Maybe later, okay?" said the Doctor.

"Okay."

After breakfast, Derpy said "Doctor? Do you want me to show you around Ponyville now?"

The Doctor answered, "Sure Derpy, where do you want to go first?"

She said "Well, I've wanted to show you Sugarcube Corner for a while, and I also wanted you to meet Twilight Sparkle, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Rarity and Spike!"

When she saw that the Doctor was thoroughly confused, she stated "They're all mares except for Spike."

The Doctor responded with something like an "Oh!"

"And Spike is a dragon, but he's a baby dragon, so he won't messily devour you and steal all your stuff."

"Okay, I guess I'd like to see Sugarcube Corner first," said the Doctor.

"Alrighty then, Doctor. Let's go!" said Derpy cheerfully.