The Black Flames

Hitting the Town

After I put the table in its rightful place, Twilight, Spike and I headed out to meet the rest of the Mane Six. I had barely made out the door behind Twilight when I was swarmed by what seemed like everypony in the town of Ponyville. They surrounded me completly, cutting me off from Twilight. I prepared myself to be tied up and taken away to be burned as a unholy monster, as this was the case in many fanfictions I have read before.

To my suprise, they began to bombard with question after question.

"What is it?"

"Are you from outerspace?"

"Do you eat ponies?!?"

"Look! It's claws are all messed up!"

"I wonder if it speaks!"

"It looks like some kind of mutant monkey! But where'd its tail go?"

"Does it like muffins? I like muffins!"

"Uh, guys?-" Twilight attempted to grab there attention but they were too focused on me to notice. At this point the mix of voices was giving me a headache. Time to put an end to this. Now. I took a deep breath and let loose the loudest command I have ever given in my life.

"SIIIIIILEEENCCE!!!!!!!!"

My voice had burst forth with more power than I thought possible for the human vocal cords, nearly deafining myself and everyone around me. It could've been that there ears were still ringing, but they listened to my single word, not a noise was made by anybody. If it weren't for the ringing in my own ears, it would've sounded to me as quiet as a ghost town.

Twilight shoved her way towards me and grabbed my hand in her hoof. It was soft, totally different from the hooves of equines back home. She yanked me in front of her then shoved me through the group and out of Ponyville, everypony's eyes following me the whole way. What a great first impression, I'm gonna get along SO well.

When the ringing in my ears stopped I decided to finally speak up.

"Your gonna kill me aren't you?" I say in an even tone.

"You have NO idea." She replied.

Somebody get me out of here.

After a while I realised that I should probably start walking on my own. Twilight moved on ahead and I simply followed. I had no idea where we were going, but I guessed somewhere for me to hide until everyone forgot what happened back in town. I'd be hiding for a good part of forever.

We eventually came to a hill. I decided to ask then, where in Einstiens name we were going.

She replied simply with, "You'll see soon enough, David."

This made me fear for my life.

Then we reached the top of the hill, and I saw what she meant.

Apple trees, organised in neat rows, spread for what I sure was several miles. It was almost a forest of apple trees. Nestled in the middle of all this was a big, red barn and farmhouse. It was beautiful.

"What are we doing here?" I ask.

"I'm gonna get Applejack, a good friend of mine, to take you while I fix what you caused back at the town."

"Fair enough." Is all I could reply with.

We walked down a wide path that cut straight through the trees towards the barn. About halfway we heard a voice.

"Hey, Twilight!" It was obvious whose voice this was. Applejack emerged from the trees, basket of apples balanced on her back.

"Whose ya wierd lookin friend?" She said, giving me a scrutinizing look.

"Applejack this is David, David Applejack"

"What's up!" I say nicely.

"The sky?" She replies, then laughs at my confused face. "I'm just yankin yer chain! Mighty nice to meet'ya Mr. David."

I chuckled a little, "Just David if you don't mind."

"And I don't" She replied, " If 'ya don't mind me askin, whatcha doin out here? You know that I go to the market on sundays, Twi, couldn't you 'ave introduced me to yer friend then?"

"I would've if David here hadn't caused an episode in front of the whole town."

Twilight gave Applejack a summary of what happened back at Ponyville.

"- so I came here to stow him away till I can explain what happened to everypony in town." Twilight finished while she had been talking I had layed myself at the foot of an appletree and daydreamed about all the hot girls I would never meet now.

"Well he can help Big Mac with puttin the apples in the barn fer winter."

"Sounds like a plan. What do you say, David?"

Forced out of my daydream, I replied, "Sure, why not."

"Well in that case, I'll see you two later!" Twilight turned around and headed towards town.

"Well follow me. You and Big Mac gotta lotta work to do."

"It's just moving baskets of apples, how hard could it be?"

"I don't think you understand. You'all be moving close to a 'undred baskets of them there apples."

"What?!?"

"Well here we are!"

I look to see what could quite possibly be a hundred large basketfulls of apples lined up under the trees. I also see Big Mac, pulling a cart laden with a couple baskets behind him, head to the farm. I saw the barn in the distance as well. I began to wonder if Twilight planned this.

"Well don't just stand there gawking! Get 'ta working!"

Twilight planned this.

I couldn't feel a thing. I had spent close to the whole day moving nintey-four baskets of apples into the barn. I don't think any amount of football training could've prepared me for that type of work out. Twilight had shown up about fourty-seven baskets in, I had begged her to get me out of the rest of it. She just said that I was going to have to finish as punishment for scaring the whole town with my outburst. I can't believe I'm saying this. What. A. Bitch.

So now here I lay on top of a pile of hay, letting my poor limbs rest. Big Mac had gone to take a nap in the farmhouse. Now that I think about it, where was Applebloom? Granny Smith had been watching me and Big Mac work from her rocking chair on the porch. But Applebloom hadn't shown herself all day.

Then the CMC drop from the rafter on to my stomach.

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS PARTY PLANNERS YEAH!!!!"

They proceded to drag my limp body back to the farmhouse. I was winded and incapable of eithier speech or movement.

They stood me up on my feet to catch my breath before opening the door and shoving me through the door.

"WELCOME TO PONYVILLE, DAVID!!!!"

I was met by the sight of everypony in town with the warmest smiles I have ever seen. It melted my heart to see everyone go to all the trouble of making sure I felt welcome.Twilight worked her way through the crowd and gave me a coy smile.

"What do you think?"

"Fuck, you guys went to all this trouble for me."

"I'm gonna assume that means you likey."

I slowly nod my head.

The rest of the Mane Six walk up and everypony else gets back to the party.

"Nice to meet 'cha names Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer in Equestria."

"Nice to meet you too, Rainbow Dash."

"I'm Rarity, darling, and might I add that it is so nice to meet the creature Twilight was talking about!"

"The pleasure is all mine."

"I'm Pinkie Pie!"

"Hi, Pinkie Pie!"

Fluttershy walked up and tried to speak, but all that came out was a tiny squeak. Not wanting to make this anymore awkward, I spoke up first.

"Hi Fluttershy, I must say you look absolutley beautiful. How do you do it?" Or maybe I really just wanted to make it more awkward? Pure evil.

Her whole face turned a bright red. I just smiled warmly as the other girls giggled like school girls. Eventually she smiled back and gave me a bear hug to rival my own. Now it was my turn to blush. The girls giggled even more and I'm pretty sure Dash wolf-whistled.

After the introductions the girls and I spent the rest of the night partying. That is until Twilight asked me to come outside. We went out back and she told me to wait outside, then she went back in. What was going on?

A bright flash blinded me briefly, then I was greeted by the sight of a tall, elegant, white mare, pastel rainbow hair floating in a non-existent wind.

"Hello, David. I am Princess Celestia"