Deus Ex: Cosplay Revolution

Okie doke.

Yeah.

It was... nine, nine I think. Nine o'clock. Yeah, I was mostly awake for... fuck, since noon I think. That's... nine, nine hours. Man, I was tired. Those hashbrowns had settled real well. Christ, I love hashbrowns.

Man, I needed to sleep. Was dark, far as I could tell. Luna'd left soon as Duvet had said "Conspiracy. War. Don't hurt me!" or something to that effect. Don't know why he was so scared, honestly, Luna was probably the coolest pony I'd met apart from the fact that, well, princess. Didn't really get that, but I was coasting along on the fact that no one knew me, I could bluff like no one else, and I was a pretty much a local hero now. People don't tend to question the actions of heroes.

Fuck, all this in the course of... four, five days? Felt like a lifetime, really. Robbed a boutique, beat a lady over the head, jumped on a train, and now I've stopped an act of rape and met with the leaders of the land.

Might as well get some sleep. I've barely had any of that.

I woke up without any pomp or flair. The pain in my chest was just a little ache, same with the shoulder and cut. The blanket was back over my chest, my arms over it. Lights in the room were on, Duvet was snoring, and all was well.

Man, what time was it? Needed to check the clock... yup, seven-ish. Right around the time the sun should be up.

Looked around the room for anything odd. Bedside table had a box on it, looked like it had a tag on it, only thing I could recognize being the "To:" and "From:" and my name, respectively. Swear the "From:" name was familiar, somehow... couldn't remember, though. Must've been the drugs in the I.V., if I couldn't. Might've seen it on the cover of a magazine of a shop while I was walking around.

I pulled it closer, flipped the top open with my good arm. Surprised me to see an envelope on the top of a folded blue trench coat that looked a lot like mine..

I grabbed the envelope, seeing a frilly design on it. Moved my thumb under the... licky part you lick to get it to stick, pushed it until it tore and moved until the thing was open. Made a loud sound but I ignored it.

The letter inside was on frilly pink stationary. It was signed in fancy cursive something, and I couldn't make a single word out because it was all in fancy, fancy, FANCY cursive. Cursive on crack, if you will. Think it said something about "Welcome anytime" and "new clothes", but honestly I could barely read it.

Put it back on the table, grabbed the trench coat, and looked at it. Perfectly clean, that's what it was. I mean, hell, I hadn't realized how much dirt had accumulated on it until I got it back right now, but damn it almost sparkled. The buttons were shined, the zipper a glistering silver, and not a single stray thread on it. Blue color of it stood out, and... where was the seam?

Held the left sleeve in my hand, looking at it real, real close. There wasn't a seam. Even I knew that if there was a cut in a cloth, there was going to be a seam if it was to be repaired. Must've been some handy magic, repairing cuts without leaving seams. I wasn't complaining, at least.

The turtleneck was the same; clean as could be, the cut repaired. Vest wasn't anywhere, and the undershirt looked completely new, so... huh, guess someone cleaned my clothes.

I folded them all back up, tossed them in the box, and waited.

Goddamn, I was doing a shitton of waiting. Was five minutes since I hit the green button, and goddamn where were the nurses? Hope to god I'd get some hashbrowns, if they came by with breakfast, but... hmm. Still no doctor.

Odd, but oh well.

And then I started hearing footsteps. Seemed I'd never stop hearing them at random times.

What I didn't expect was a doctor-looking type walking in, the same nurse as before behind him. He was carrying a clipboard, along with a tray of medicine and shit. Made me tense, soon as I saw the syringes and shit on it, but... hopefully it wouldn't come to that.

Soon as he saw me looking at him with wide eyes, he grinned. "Ah, yes, Darrell Mays. Hear you're something like a hero," he said, almost too jolly to be true. "Is it true you stopped a rape?"

I nodded. "Yeah, lotsa people been asking me. All I've been saying is 'right place, right time,' to the lot of them." I leaned back against the bed, raising it just slightly. "You gonna do some tests on me?"

"Yes, that's correct. A magical scan of your ribs and shoulder showed multiple injuries, something I'd like to see the severity of myself. Now, if you would please stand up..."

The assistant moved to get me out of the bed but I waved her off. "I don't think I have a broken leg," I grunt out. Then I throw the blanket off the bed, twist around with a little pain, and get my feet on the ground. I push off the bed, there's a sharp pain in my lungs, but I think I'm okay. After that I turn to the doc and smirk a little. "So, tests. You wanna do those?"

The doc nods. I shrug.

Eh, might as well.

"Remarkable."

That's the fifth time I'd heard that word coming out of Doc's mouth. All I'd done is windmill both my arms around, let him check the cut on my arm, feel around my ribs, and he was oohing and ahhing like a JB fangirl. Apparently, recovering from a dislocated shoulder like this was... unheard of. Definitely not this quick, not back home. Must've been something in the air, or maybe the powers-that-be wanted me back in the action sooner, because my shoulder was damn near fine, the cut was almost gone, and my ribs must've mended themselves.

"We'd initially thought healing spells and salves would be harmful to your... non-standard physiology, but it appears you're recovering at an astounding rate!" the doc says, smiling wide as a serial killer, "This is absolutely unheard of!"

I hold up a hand. "Yeah, I heard it the first time. You're gonna keep this between me and you, right? I don't want ponies swarming me, poking and prodding." He looks a bit disappointed, and I add on a "I got a job to do, unfortunately, but soon as I get done with that I'll let you stick me with needles. All I gotta ask is if I can get visiting hours to Duvet and pain meds."

"Yes, of course, yes to the both of them. Seeing as you're young and strong as an ox, I can see you recovering relatively quickly. Don't worry about your address and information. We've got it all on-file." He flips a page on the clipboard. "Darrell Mays, currently living with a Ms. Summer. Is that correct?"

Ms. Summer? "Yeah..." I reply, trying not to make the uncertainty in my voice sound too obvious. "Can I get her address? I have a nasty habit of forgetting."

"Of course, sir." He turns the clipboard over, pointing to a little field. I stare at the address on there. Yeah, think she said that was where she lived... damn, if I had my phone I'd take a picture to remember, but I didn't. "In fact, I actually think Ms. Summer herself is in the waiting room! Would you like to see her?"

I go ahead and nod. Wondered if that was her first or last name. And if she was Shade, if I should tell her about the visit by the Princesses or not... Fuck, this was moving too fast.

Might as well start getting my clothes on.

Soon enough, the doc came back. Walking behind him was a certain secret agent that I'd recognize anywhere, especially in a low-cut dress like that. I had the turtleneck on, the letter from the tailor in between the folds of the trench coat under my arm.

They must've been doing the West Wing-style, walk n' talk, because all I caught of their conversation was "-takes two pills a day, one every six hours" from the doc, and "-When do I have to bring him in for an examination?" from Shade.

Second the mare saw me she smiled. "Hello, friend. How's the hospital been treating you?"

I shrug. "Good. You come to pick me up? We going on a date or something? Didn't expect to see you so nicely dressed."

She chuckles. "Sure. I've already signed the release forms and gathered your belongings, so you're free to come with me. Unless there's some business you need to attend to..."

Didn't expect that answer, but... Business? Business... shit. I turn to the doc and grab him by the shoulder. "Hey, if Duvet's ever up, you let my housemate know so I can be by his side, alright?" The doc nods. "Alright. Anyhow, I'll just... be leaving."

And with that, we're out the door.

"You're not really... considering a date, are you?" I... I want to say ask but that's something I've been doing too much of. "You and I have only known each other for three days. And the only interaction has been professional."

She just grins. "I need to convince my coworkers that I have a life outside work, I need to keep an eye on you, I haven't seen a good movie in a while, and you should probably learn more about Equestrian culture if you're gonna be here a while. That's called multi-tasking."

Well, I can see she lives to work. I'm honestly not complaining; one, because a guy never won in a discussion with a woman, and two, she raised some good points. Couldn't go my entire stay here, however long or short it'd be, without eventually learning something about the natives. And if that crazy demon bitch came back...

She stops, suddenly. I almost walk past her, but she's staring at a movie poster. "Do you want to see this? I heard from a friend that it's pretty good."

All I can think is are you bullshitting me?

"Star Ponies Episode One: A New Hope, that's what was displayed. Even had the same poster. Twelve different kinds of highly-distinct bullshit, that's what I was smelling, but fuck it, I've lost control of my life as it is.

"Or..." then she turns to a different movie poster, "How's about this one? It's about a foreign super-spy. Think you'd like that."

I could almost hear the cheeky grin, but I was distracted. Distracted by a pair of pretty mares (seriously, no guys in the Secret Police?) standing barely fifty or so feet from me and Shade. I could tell they were government, mostly by the black business suits and little earpieces they wore. Most likely they'd taken notice of me, and I of them.

Honestly, this could go one of two ways. I walk up, tell 'em to stick their heads up their identical asses, or I politely ignore them. All I want is a little bit of peace to sort through my own thoughts, actions, and maybe a little cheesy movies.