Falling Backwards

There is nothing that can separate two ponies more than time and distance. Moving from place to place, you never make any ties, forge strong connections. Those you do manage to cope with, the next second you're uprooting and leaving them behind. You always promise to keep in touch but the conversation slowly dies. Time ages you, distance keeps you apart. You both grow up, but you never grow up together. This can happen at any time, any place or to any pony. The closest of ties can be broken. But that does not mean you can't mend them.

I stood atop the hill, looking down at the houses below. Faint yellow candle lights spilled out of windows and open doors. It was unusually warm for so early of spring. Everypony took advantage of this sudden summer weather and grills were polished and broken in for the coming season. Pools were unsheathed so that the boiling foals could frolic and play, while the adults stood and talked and cooked. The entire block hosted a massive pile of simultaneous backyard parties in a show of friendship and trust. I watched them from afar, my bright yellow fur rustling in the breeze. The parties were just beginning to wind down, with foals being carted off to bed and the adults retiring into tents and homes to drink and party further.

The town was fair sized, with a few blocks of closely built houses, each one resembling its neighbor's. Though there were some differences between them, it made choosing the right house difficult. From my perch, I could spot my house. It wasn't easy to see but mine had a distinctive pentagon-shaped picnic table in the front. It had always been there for the full year we had stayed here in Pinewood. Without this distinctive feature, I would never have recognized the bland, square white house.

My ears perked to the soft sigh of wind and I rolled over onto my back. The grass brushed along my wings, sending little shivers down my body. Again the wind sighed, stroking my mane and sending it scattering about me. Insects and creatures suddenly lifted off from the trees and bushes around me. Fireflies lit their tails and zoomed through the air, twisting and turning in marvelous little swirls. Slowly, I stretched out a hoof to the sky, watching them whisk suddenly by. A curious moth fluttered by and lighted on my hoof for half a second before taking off in its never ending dance. I watched it fly away, the faintest of smiles on my face. The sky above lit up with a thousand brilliant stars, all winking and shining against the blue and black canvas above. The little white moth drifted away, taking its place along the twinkling, beautiful curtain. I stared after it, brow furrowing.

Another sweet breeze drifted by, carrying with it the heavy, alluring perfume of wild flowers. I followed the wind onto my stomach and cast my gaze back toward the neighborhood. Lights were beginning to flicker out. A dozen merry shouts of farewell drifted to my little hill and I huffed. The parties were over, the cups were empty. Ponies were returning home.

Unfortunately, that meant I had to return as well.

I slowly picked myself up and started slowly across the wild garden. Petals lovingly brushed against my hooves in their own little farewell, praying I come back again. I gave the hill one small glance before hopping down onto the pavement. Now down among the houses, the wind carried the scent of food and grills and hay. As I trotted along,my mind began to wander. Specifically, to Sun Blaze. A small smile came to my face as I trotted faster toward home. Mom would be at work now, meaning the house would be empty, and it was staying like that all night. I was heading for Blaze's.

Is it childish to still look forward to a weekend at your dad's? I was tall for my age, then. Everypony expected me to be as mature, too. So I forced the excitement down and let it flutter in my heart as I turned sharply down the driveway. Out house was exactly like everypony else's. Nothing special, just a one story brick place with a long front side and a short driveway. We had a garage, made of old polished wood that clashed horribly with the brick, but we never used it. A short patch of grass sat in the front, with one perfectly parallel in the back. There was nothing special to either short patches, other than the lopsided pentagon table. It was old and rotting, distasteful but Mom said it had class. I frowned at it as I trotted up the driveway.

There was a pony next door, Vivid. She was a good neighbor and friends with Posey. Her groomed purple mane stirred in the breeze as she trudged the small forest that was her lawn. A large, overly friendly grin splayed across her face. It took her a few tries to finally catch my attention. Turning around, there she was, little blades of grass stuck in her bright green hooves. I stared at them while she continued to approach. As though four feet was not close enough.

"Little Flutters," She cooed in her loud, jarring voice. My ears pinned and I looked up through a million pink strands into her neon face. A small huff escaped me and she laughed, drawing me into a hug. My body went rigid and as tight as she hugged, she could not work me out of it. Finally, she gave up and set me back on the ground. "You've grown taller since last weekend," She remarked. "So, I was wondering if your mother had that gardening spade I lent her? I really need to get to work on the flowerbed while the soil's still fresh." Her grin widened in a strangely neighborly way. I glanced from her to the house and nodded, letting more hair fall into my vision.

"It's in the house." I turned, flapping my wings and bounding up to the porch. Vivid had always been welcome for the whole year and a half Mom and I had been here. The two had been friends from work when they had run a flower shop together. The green earth mare followed me up when a strange clapping sounded behind us. I turned to see a red and brown stallion stumbling up the drive. His bright orange eyes were unfocused as they swept across the yard. Upon spotting me, he lit up. Neon took one look at Sun Blaze and frowned, raising a brow.

"Fluttershy!" Blaze bellowed for the whole street. He paused and swallowed hard, grinning wide. "C'mere an' gimme a hug!" He sat and opened his hooves.

"Daddy!" I had never been a great flier, but I zipped over to him. He was thrice my height, big and bulky with a belly that stuck out further than his nose did. A thick brown stubble had fixed itself to his face and his bright eyes watered. He hugged me for half a second and stood up, nearly knocking me aside.

"Well now, how's about we go get somethin' to eat, eh?" He stared off toward Vivid and winked before giving me a look-over. "You're taller." His hoof slung around my shoulders and dragged me in. "Oh, my baby filly's growing up, isn't she." He settled himself on the sidewalk, chest heaving as though it cost him effort. "Soon you'll be too old fer a cuddle. Too old for ol' daddy, huh?" He chuckled and rolled onto his back, staring up toward the sky. Stars of all shapes danced and twinkled above us, but he focused on none of them. I frowned, looking over his reddened face. "So, you're just gonna up and leave me, then." He sighed, filling the air with his dank, heavy breath. I recoiled slightly, muzzle scrunching. What was- "But not today, huh? Naw, you're always gonna be my little girl!" He yanked me down to the concrete, wrapping me in a tight hug.

"Dad," I rasped, squirming. "Da- ow, daddy stop." Vivid trotted down the porch steps and came closer, ears half down.

"Fluttershy?" Her voice was soft but it carried. The two of us perked up. "My spade? Please, before you... Go." Her eyes met Blaze's and he turned over, dropping me.

"Oh, right." I scrambled to my hooves and patted Blaze's cheek. "I'll be right back, then we can go." I galloped over to the door and yanked it open. The house was warm, almost uncomfortably so from being outside. No candles were lit but a few slivers of silvery moonlight sliced through the darkness. It gave me just enough light to find the curtains string and I pulled it, letting moonlight flood through the livingroom.

The spade was somewhere in the commode, across the room. Mom had been using it to plant a few flowers in the window pots. She always had to have a flower in bloom somewhere through the house. Even through the winter. She could get a flower to bloom through any season. All she did was talk to it, her voice soft and gentle. I remember that voice from when I was a filly. She used to fly me around the house and sing and talk to me like that. Except for once, though. She came into my room late at night and climbed onto my bed. She held me, apologizing every few minutes for waking me up. Her hoof brushed gently through my mane and she hugged me and started a little story. I don't remember the words, but her voice was cracked and dry. She strained just to speak. When I asked her about it, she only said that she had used it all up. Used it on daddy.

I found the spade easily and galloped back to the window. Vivid and Blaze were still there. As I reached for the string, though, something changed. Vivid tossed a hoof and turned away, tail flicking. Blaze reached for her and she turned around and struck the size of his muzzle. Sun Blaze stumbled back, but only just before rearing up on the mare. She skipped back, shouting something I couldn't hear. Blaze rushed toward her, lifting a hoof.

I burst through the front door. "Stop!" There was a pause from both the ponies. Vivid was the first to draw her gaze from the other's. Her brow was dark, her eyes hard and narrowed.

"Fluttershy, go back inside." She snapped the words, not quickly but harshly. Her eyes snapped back onto Blaze, who had not taken his off her. I opened my mouth to object but she cut me off, barking the order again.

"No, she'sa comin' with me." Blaze growled, finally snapping his gaze on me. His orange eyes tinged with red, his lips pulled back into a snarl.

"Blaze, go home. You can come and get her tomorrow." Vivid stepped casually between us. I had not moved from the porch, the spade still clutched in one wing.

"She's my daughter!" He barked. "I have a right to take her. You stupid liberals, always trying to taking away our rights. My rights!" His ears pinned tight against his short, wavy mane. "I won't let you take my rights, and you're sure as hell not gonna take my daughter." He trotted toward me. Every step was punctuated by another furious shout. Vivid scrambled after him, snatching his ankle.

"Blaze, you can't take her anywhere like this."

"I said back off, bitch." He whipped around, hoof flying out. Vivid pushed on his chest at the same moment and he stumbled back, flipped around. His big, heavy hoof cracked against my cheek.

Both of us tumbled backward, he into the uniform garden and me back onto the porch. I gasped, my own hooves flying to my face. Time seemed to stretch on into infinity. I stared down at the stallion in the garden. He yanked out the beautiful tulips and posies. Never before had I paid them much heed but now, as their delicate roots were exposed and their soft little petals were shredded, I was struck with a pang of sorrow. They had been beautiful. When Sun Blaze finally relieved himself from the plants, he glared up at me.

"You're coming with me."

Vivid was at my side in an instant. She lifted me roughly off the porch and backed me toward the door. "Sun Blaze, you need to go home. Now." He laid a hoof on the porch. "If you don't leave, I'm going to call the police." She found the door and tore it open, shoving me inside. I moved without resistance.

I fell limply into the dark house. Not even the moon could penetrate the heavy cloud of darkness anymore. I stared into that shade blankly, watching its fuzzy patterns and faint silhouettes. Suddenly, everything held Blaze's shape. He was sitting on the couch just a few feet away. He was in the closet across the entrance, searching for a pair of horseshoes. He was standing by the fridge, grinning wickedly from his shroud of darkness. Blaze surrounded me, his sharp breath filling my every sense. He towered above me, all across every corner of the ceiling. The moonlight could not reach there.

The door suddenly slammed, jolting me back to the ponies. Vivid leaned against the front door. From the other side came the furious loud cracks. Blaze shouted obscenities, one for every punch. The door creaked and shook, beating against Vivid as she pressed it shut. I looked from her to the lock and the at the window. He wasn't where I could see. Perhaps he was not even out there. What if her really was inside the house? Standing behind me, his foul breath clogging the air. His hazy, bloodshot eyes glaring down at me and that fierce, ugly snarl on his face.

"Fluttershy, go call the police." Vivid pressed harder on the door. "Sun Blaze, go home. I can't let you take her!" He responded harshly, words and threats battering the door as much as his body did.

"You dumbass liberals wanna take away my rights?" He bellowed. "Well guess what, sister? I gotta myself the right to see my daughter. And you know what else? One to bare arms too. Know what that means?" He slammed his shoulder again into the door but it held, the splintering wood slicing through his fur. "When I get back yer dead. Ya hear me, dead! I shoot you right through the goddam head if I have to. Let me see my daughter!" His massive weight shook the door and he broke out with a loud huff, marching down the porch steps.

"Fluttershy, go. Now." Vivid continued to hold the door, craning her neck to watch the window. I stumbled back, looking all around. Everywhere except that door. Vivid continued to shout at me and coax me to the phone. By the time I finally made it to the landline, I was drenched in tears.

Sun Blaze never came back. He never fulfilled his promise. Mom eventually did and Vivid explained everything to her. The poor mare. Mom couldn't begin to thank her enough for what she had done but I couldn't even understand it. All I knew was that we packed up that night. We loaded everything we owned onto a cart. Three days later, Grandma and Papa out in Cloudsdale opened their home for us. I left another city, and all my acquaintances, behind. A new start, somewhere that angry red earth stallion could not get to us. Mom kept me close after that. She never let me out of Cloudsdale by myself. I was only four.

And I never saw Sun Blaze again.