Fun Fact: Okapis originated on the moon during the time that Nightmare Moon was banished to the moon. Coincidence or evidence that Luna is involved in sinister animal cruelty?

So Vinyl Scratch, hip hoppin’ DJ that just so happened to be in Ponyville at the time, was speaking with some random civilian about a new invention she created that appeared to be two speakers separated by a hollow box.

“And so I call this the ghetto blaster.”

“I don’t know about this vinyl, boomboxes are pretty heavy-”

“Yeah they are! That just means they can drop heavy beats!”

Lyra Heartstrings, a musician in her own right, shook her head at this interruption. “No, I mean that this could probably kill a pony with the force you say it’ll hurl them out at.”

“Dang right it’s got force! It’ll force everypony to dance!”

“No, I mean if you fire this at somepony then the shockwave from it should probably knock everypony around them down.”

“You’re totally right. Everypony’s gonna get down when this thing starts popping off!”

Exasperated, Lyra applied pressure to the bridge of her nose and attempted to be patient. “Vinyl, I respect you as a musician but you can’t use this. Somepony can get seriously hurt.”

“Oh come on, it’s not like I’m Princess Luna. See?” And Vinyl reached over the surface of her machine to point out the moon princess who was in the town center, shooting up the place.

Lyra ducked under a bench. “Vinyl, get down! She’s going crazy again!”

“It’s alright, I got this.” And Vinyl slammed her hoof on a button behind the machine. It started to rattle like a washing machine that’s been overloaded, something ponies never have to deal with because they are all pretty much naked. And after a little bit of adjustments, Vinyl tilted the hollow end upwards and pointed it straight at Princess Luna. From forth it burst out a gigantic boombox that was playing some sick beats that sounded like a robot was getting a root canal. Hooves down, it was probably one of Vinyl’s best tracks playing.

At this point in time Luna happened to be in the center of town making a grand announcement.

“AND SO THAT IS WHY YOU SHOULD STAY AWAY UNTIL THE SITUATION IS RESOLVED! KEEP IN MIND THAT NIGHTMARE NIGHT IS STILL GOING TO HAPPEN, SO LOOK FORWARD TO THE FESTIVITIES.”

And with her announcement concluded. Luna could pay attention to the odd noise that seemed to be clouding the sound of gunshots. Had she not been an alicorn, she was sure that her ears may have been bleeding, as what she seemed to be hearing was the new music that ponies seemed to be listening to nowadays. She turned her body to face the source of this awful sound and subsequently had her gut crushed with a wild flying boombox playing dubstep. The dubstep made it all the more painful.

Now, normally Luna is totally down for tummy wubs, because tummy wubs are some of the best wubs ever next to head massages or when a pony scratches behind her ears, it’s just super awesome. But this is the worst tummy wub in the world. Sure, there were wubs, and there was her tummy, but it hurt pretty bad. She doubled over, clutching her belly and almost passed out.

With the tyrant pretty much dead, Vinyl lifted her noteworthy violet tinted shades in surprise that she just took out a princess and she decided to bail. Her her speed she left the ghetto blaster and its ammunition behind.

Several hours later a zebra colt in Detrot was waiting at home for his father to return. It was getting around lunchtime, or at least lunchtime for all the other ponies. Little Ice Pac knew that he would be lucky if he would manage to get a slice of bread from some generous pony, but life was much too hard for him to even have this token of kindness. Life never seemed to treat this poor colt with any favor, he had to grow up on the streets with his dad for a couple of years until they finally managed to live in some rinky dink apartment, and even then it wasn’t much different except for the four walls and the decrease in rat nests. But still, he was able to count his one blessing and that was that he had a dedicated and hard working father who he knew was doing his best to raise him. And the least he could do was wait for Ice Cube to return.

And after a while, while staring at the door, he saw the knob turn. This could’ve meant anything, they lived in the kinda place where strangers could walk into your home and if they did then it’s probably best just to ignore them and let them take what they want, nopony wants to make waves after all. But this time the sun seemed to be shining on him, because who stood in the doorway after the door creaked open was none other than his father, Ice Cube.

“Hey Dad!” Ice Pac galloped up to his dad and wrapped his arms around him. “Where’d you go?”

“S’alright son, I just went out to get you something.” Ice Cube said as he embraced his son. When this engagement was over he closed the door went over to the paltry box that served as the sole furnishings of their quaint room and set down a brown paper bag. “Here son, it’s all yours.”

Ice Pac approached the opposite side of the box and looked inside the bag. Inside was a rather small sandwich that was so very delicately made and full of the nutrients he has been denied over his life. Its mere presence was more than simply nourishment for the self but an act of familial love, a demonstration of the bond between father and son.

“Thanks dad! But it’s so small, I don’t know how to split it.”

“Son, it’s all yours.”

“But dad, I haven’t seen you eat in a while. You need it more than me.”

“S’alright son, I can handle myself. You gotta eat and grow strong, you gotta be strong for yourself and for me. You gotta be strong so that we can get out of this, so that you don’t gotta to keep living like this.” Ice Pac saw the weak smile on his dad’s face. “Come on son, it’s getting cold. Eat up.”

Ice Pac took one bite and faught back tears. It was the best sandwich he ever had, and the best thing he might ever eat.

After this moment a knock came at the door. That was something nopony ever did in this forsaken neighborhood. But Ice Cube had been around long enough to know what a knock at the door meant. Cautiously, he got up and cracked the door open just a smidge, and saw the armored forms of several guards.

“What you want?”

“Ice Cube, citizen of Detrot?”

“Yeah, what’s it to you?”

The guards pushed open the door and forced the exasperated father inside, nearly knocking him to his haunches.

“You are under arrest for assaulting the princess with a musical device.”

Ice Cube steadied himself. “Yo, get outta my home. I ain’t ever hit nobody with nothing.”

“Well the only other zebra near the vicinity of Ponyville, Zecora, has an alibi, and you no doubt have a boombox.”

“Yo, what makes you think I got the money for a boombox?”

“Well you just seem the type.”

“And I ain’t even been to Ponyville, son. I been in Detrot forever.”

“Well you’re the only pony who fits the profile, so you’re the culprit.”

“A'ight, and what is the profile?”

“You’re the type of pony who’d own a boombox.”

“And what’s the type of pony who’d own a boombox?”

“A pony of your attributes, clearly.”

“Yo man, this is whack!”

“Come along peacefully sir.” They didn’t much give him a choice. They ushered him off towards the door, but before he left Ice Cube looked over his shoulder and said only one last thing to his son before he left.

“Buck the royal guard!”

Author's Note

I'd like to think Ghetto Blaster is also a good name for a musically themed pony.