Chapters The Other Side of the Mirror
The first hint of fall filled the air. It filled Stennulf Greybourne with worry. After fall would come winter, and with winter would come the proof of his preparations. He had been busy all spring, through the summer, and now, fall was beginning to make its presence known.
He had been busy. A small squat cabin had been constructed. It was crude, but it was functional, and he had even blocked out most of the wind by slathering mud into the spaces between the logs. A small wood stove had been recovered. It was slightly rusty, but serviceable… and it had been the last time he had spoken to his own kind, way back when it was still spring. It had taken him almost a week to drag the heavy cast iron wood stove back to his homestead.
He had food stored up, dried smoked fish, jerked meat, and canned goods that he had recovered from his last home, a small camping trailer that he had abandoned. It was in poor repair and it hadn’t been far enough away from what he desired to be away from most.
Stennulf scratched at his reddish beard and surveyed his work. He had been tapping maple trees and had dried maple syrup into hard crunchy bits of something almost like candy. It was a good source of energy, and he had eaten a few this morning. There was a lot to get done. He didn’t know how much firewood he needed to get through the winter. He hoped to err on the side of caution.
The second cabin he had constructed stored his food. It was much smaller, but solidly built. He couldn’t stand up in there, but he really didn’t need to. Much of the cabin had been built down into the ground to act as a root cellar.
All of this hard work was a small price to pay to be away from what he hated most. Humanity. Stennulf had grown tired of his fellow humans, burned out by the world around him. And so he had retreated to a place where humanity wasn’t, and his outlook on life had vastly improved. His constant hard work had burned away his lingering constant depression. He struggled with his solitude, but it was easier to deal with his solitude than it was to deal with his fellow human beings.
It had taken quite a bit to motivate him to go to these lengths to get away from it all. The last human being that he actually valued, his mother, had died last Christmas. She passed early on Christmas morning, after spending half a year being devoured by cancer. A long string of girlfriends, all of whom who had cheated on him, had left him burned out and bitter. The worsening economy and the inability to find any sort of meaningful employment had destroyed his sense of self worth. The final straw had been in the early spring, when he had discovered that his next door neighbors had been molesting children in their unlicensed daycare. He had simply walked away from everything.
He had to admit though, he was starting to miss the sounds of other human voices, and he spent an awful lot of time speaking to himself. There was also a new worrying sense of fatigue that he always had, a feeling of being constantly tired. He worried if he was missing something in his diet. He tried to eat well, given what he had to work with. He felt constantly tired and short of breath now, and his bowel movements had been a little runny.
Stennulf wrote it off as his body adjusting to eating real food rather than all of the usual processed stuff his diet had consisted of prior to abandoning society. It seemed like a reasonable assumption.
He grabbed a crude wooden yoke he had carved, it was designed to go over his shoulders and allowed him to carry two large buckets. It was time to collect water, which meant a bit of a walk and a lot of effort. He shouldered the yoke and the empty buckets, both made out of plastic, each was a five gallon bucket that had once held laundry detergent. He had found both in an abandoned campsite that had been completely trashed and covered in litter. Stennulf suspected that the campsite had been used for meth production. He had salvaged quite a bit of stuff from the site.
As he began his hike to the lake, he wondered what he was going to do about boots when his current pair wore out. He might have to kill a deer and make moccasins or something. He wasn’t quite sure what to do actually, but he was mindful that there was a problem and he supposed that counted for something.
After a bit of a hike, he was huffing and puffing a bit, but determined to keep going. He didn’t even have his water yet. Going back would mean a heavy load and walking uphill. He pressed onwards, feeling a burning sensation in his calves and stabbing cramps in the bottom of his feet. He wished that he had access to the internet. He seemed to recall something about burning calves and cramps in the bottom of your feet… something to do with bananas or something ridiculous.
After a long hike the lake finally came into view, and he veered off the path, heading to one of the many springs that fed the lake, a small pool of relatively fresh and clean looking water that formed in a natural rock basin.
And it was at about this moment that Stennulf Greybourne wondered if he lost his mind. Skipping around the pool was a little pink something . It looked like a horse. Only smaller. It was singing to itself, er, she was singing to herself. His yoke slipped from his shoulders and his buckets clattered to the ground.
The pink creature looked at him.
“Hi!” she chirped. “My name is Pinkie Pie!”
Stennulf froze. He had been alone for too long. Now, he was seeing an imaginary pink miniature horse that talked to him.
The small pink creature glanced at the pool, and then looked nervously at Stennulf. She was still smiling, but now looked a little spooked.
“Hello,” said Stennulf, wringing his hands together. “My name is Stennulf. Am I imagining you?”
“I don’t know, I think I am real, but I have no way of knowing for certain,” Pinkie Pie replied. “I came through the mirror, and I found myself here, wherever here is. What are you?” she asked.
“What am I?” Stennulf repeated.
“I’ve never seen anything quite like you,” Pinkie Pie quipped.
“I… I am a human being… what are you?” Stennulf returned.
“I am a pony, but not a bean,” she chirped.
“Mirror?” Stennulf questioned.
“Well, you see, I was out exploring the castle of the Royal Pony Sisters and I found this hidden room which wasn’t hidden very well because my Pinkie Sense told me there was a hidden room and then told me there was a hidden switch behind another hidden place, and then I found the button to open that hidden place hidden in plain sight, it was one of the jewels on a statue of Celestia, so I pressed it and it opened the hidden compartment where there was a bit of a puzzle and I had to press things in the right order, and my Pinkie Sense told me what to do and when, and then another passage opened up and I followed it to a secret room and there was a mirror on the wall, and so I checked the mirror out and I saw everything here, and then I touched the mirror and fell through and came up through the pool over there, and then you came along,” Pinkie Pie replied.
Stennulf fell down to the ground, landing on his backside with a thump. He hadn’t heard another voice in so long. He had to be hearing things. He closed his eyes, and then he desperately tried to reclaim his sanity. After several moments of sitting in complete silence, he felt something brush up against his nose. He opened his eyes and saw two blue eyes staring at him, and a pink face.
“You don’t believe me do you?” she asked.
“I don’t know what to believe anymore,” Stennulf admitted.
“You look sad. My Pinkie Sense tells me you are sad. Why are you sad?” Pinkie asked, bumping the human’s nose again with her own.
She felt real. He reached out one trembling hand, which hovered over the small pink pony’s head. Steeling his nerve, he lowered his hand and stroked her ear, wrapping his fingers around it and tugging gently, letting it slide between his fingers.
“Aaah,” Pinkie gasped, her eyes closing.
He rubbed behind her ear for a moment, feeling her pelt. She was soft and warm. He could feel her breath on him. She was real . “This is impossible,” he muttered.
The short hairs of her pelt were like fine silk, almost too soft, and his brain had trouble accepting the sensory input he was experiencing. He ran his fingers along the back of her skull, feeling the curve of her bone structure, and then he ran his fingers down her neck, which caused the strange pink mammal to shiver.
“Oh that feels nice,” Pinkie Pie murmured. “You’re very friendly.”
Stennulf pulled his hand away, realising he wasn’t stroking some dumb animal. A human woman might slap him for what he had done. He felt a blush rising to his face. The pink pony didn’t seem to mind however.
“So you come from beyond a mirror?” Stennulf asked.
“Yes I do. Want to see?” Pinkie asked.
“I do,” Stennulf said, desperate for some kind of company, to hear another voice again, even if it was some crazy imaginative hallucination he was experiencing. He carefully stood up and watched as the pink pony pranced away to the pool.
She leaned down and touched the water with her nose. “Look, you can still see the mirror room,” she beckoned.
Stennulf reached the edge of the water and looked in.
He saw madness. In the water, he could see a stone room. He saw dust and cobwebs. He peered in, trying to make out what he saw in the dimly lit room in the water. He leaned over and tried to get a closer look.
And it was at that moment that he felt two somethings press into his backside and shove him. He fell into the water with a cry and a splash, which was weird, because he wasn’t wet. He fell, a long long ways, his arms and legs flailing as he fell.
And then, he landed with a thud on a stone floor. A second later there was the clattering of hooves beside him. He struggled to suck in air and gasped a few times. He reached out and touched the edge of a stone tile with his fingertip. He rolled over and looked up, looking all around him, and looked at the mirror on the wall. It showed the reflection of the room and nothing more.
“The other place is gone,” Pinkie Pie observed, sounding a little worried. She walked over to the mirror and tapped it lightly with her hoof. “It’s solid. Oh no!”
A rising feeling of panic flowed through Stennulf. He had no idea where he was, or how far he was from home. He felt a cold sweat spreading over his skin and the cold hardness of the stone floor beneath him.
Pinkie Pie wrapped on the mirror a few times to no avail.
“Twilight Sparkle will know how to fix this,” Pinkie Pie announced.
Stennulf rose to his feet and wobbled. He started to stumble, and then his hand connected with Pinkie Pie’s back. She braced him, and he did not fall.
“You okay?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” he replied.
“We should go, don’t worry, Twilight Sparkle is super smart, and she’s been through another mirror just like this one, she’ll know what to do,” Pinkie Pie reassured.
Pinkie Pie took off slowly, Stennulf still leaning on her for support. As they neared the door, the mirror behind them shattered into a million glittering pieces.
“Uh oh,” Pinkie Pie gasped.
Stennulf said nothing, but stood there with his mouth hanging open.
“No no no no!” Pinkie Pie protested, her eyes tearing over. She started to sob and sat down upon the floor.
Not knowing what else to do, Stennulf stroked her ear again, knowing how she had enjoyed it the last time. He hunkered down and squatted at eye level. “Don’t cry,” he said gently.
“But how can you go home now?” Pinkie asked.
“You said there was another mirror,” Stennulf replied.
“There is,” Pinkie Pie said as she nodded, some of her sobs subsiding.
“So nothing to worry about,” Stennulf soothed.
“I guess you’re right,” Pinkie Pie said, recovering a little. “Please rub my ear a little more,” she asked.
The human tried to comfort the pink pony, and stroked her ears, occasionally running his fingertips through her poofy mane. She calmed, wiped her eyes with her foreleg, and then hiccuped once.
“Thank you,” she said gratefully. “We should go and find Twilight Sparkle.”
The pair emerged from the castle as short while later, Stennulf trailing along behind Pinkie Pie, who seemed much better now. It seemed that her moods ran hot or cold, but Stennulf didn’t mind. He was glad for the company. After all, she was a pony , not a human.
“I hope the others aren’t afraid of you,” Pinkie said as they walked. “You seem nice. You seem really nice. It was very nice of you to rub my ears and make me feel better.”
Stennulf did not reply, but followed the pink pony, looking all around him as he walked. The woods around him looked strange. Everything was unnaturally bright and colourful, just like Pinkie Pie was. Really seemed a bit off here. Everything looked like it did when he had taken five dried grams of mushrooms that one time and thought he saw God.
“Twilight Sparkle is a princess and she is really nice and she will probably contact Princess Celestia who will probably want to talk to you,” Pinkie Pie babbled as she bounced.
Princess ponies Stennulf thought to himself.
“And I have to introduce you to all of my other friends as well,” Pinkie Pie exclaimed. “There is Applejack, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity.”
“So… is everybody here a pony?” Stennulf asked.
“Well, mostly. Spike is a dragon,” Pinkie Pie replied.
“A dragon?” Stennulf said in alarm.
“Well, he is little, and mostly harmless, he’s only tried wrecking the town maybe once or twice,” Pinkie Pie explained.
“Only once or twice you say,” Stennulf said dryly, his sense of humour finally kicking in now that the shock had completely obliterated all of his defenses. He had to pick up his pace to keep up with the bouncing pink pony. She didn’t trot like a normal horse or a pony. She boinged as she traveled forward.
They made good time through the woods, even with Stennulf having some trouble walking. The cramps in his feet and his legs were worrisome. Pinkie Pie continued to chatter loquaciously and Stennulf found he didn’t mind. Pinkie Pie was warm and genuinely friendly, something he hadn’t seen in his fellow human beings for quite some time.
He found himself wanting to touch her, to feel her supple pelt under his fingers… it was very much like wanting to stroke a cat or a very fluffy dog. She seemed open to being touched, but Stennulf wondered how the other ponies might take it. He had no clue to the social interactions here.
“We’re going to have to find you a place to live,” Pinkie Pie proclaimed.
“I could live in the woods, I wouldn’t mind,” Stennulf replied.
“The Everfree is full of manticores and hydras and big dragons,” Pinkie quipped cheerfully.
Stennulf gulped.
“They would gobble you right up,” Pinkie Pie said with a giggle. “Live in the woods… heh!” The pink pony giggle-snorted, which caused her poofy curls to bounce adorably.
“You know, if I am going to be meeting royalty, I should get cleaned up first. I am probably in need of a bath or a shower,” Stennulf said sheepishly.
“Oh, you are in need of a good scrubbing, but I was trying to be polite. You’re stinky!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed. “For a time, I wondered if all hooman beans smelled like you, but then I saw all the caked on dirt and I realised, you’re just a dirty bean.”
Quite without meaning to, Stennulf found himself chuckling.
“I am not sure where to get you cleaned up,” Pinkie Pie said. “We really should take you to Twilight first and let her know about you. And then we can figure out where you are staying and then get you cleaned up.”
And then, Ponyville came into view. Stennulf fell down, landing on his backside for the second time this day, and stared ahead. It was a town full of ponies .
Pinkie Pie watched his wide eyed stare and giggled, as the hooman bean looked very silly. The pink pony couldn’t help but notice that his face was as expressive as her own, and his expressions of emotion were very similar to pony expressions, but there was some differences. His face was flat and didn’t have a muzzle. His eyes were smaller. But there were plenty of similarities.
The pink mare heaved a sigh. She didn’t know how the ponies in town before them would respond to her new friend. She hoped there wouldn’t be too much trouble. She worried mostly about the pegasi, the protectors of the town.
“Whatever happens, just stay real close to me Stennulf,” Pinkie Pie instructed as she gazed off towards distant Ponyville.
The Other Side of the Mirror
Pinkamena Diane Pie paused purposefully and pondered her precarious predicament. Ahead was Ponyville. Full of ponies, ponies easily spooked or otherwise panicked. She craned her head and looked up at her hooman bean companion. He seemed nice enough for a type of vegetable that walked on two legs. Plus, he could do marvelous things with his minotaur like hands, things like stroking ears. She wondered about the other things he could do with his hands. Like baking. Or maybe scratching itchy places like that spot right next to her croup.
“Hey, before we go, can you scratch that itchy place just above my croup? It only itches when something bad is gonna happen,” Pinkie Pie requested.
“What’s a croup?” Stennulf asked.
“The section of my spine just above my dock, right in between my hips,” Pinkie explained. She felt fingers scratching and working into her pelt. “Aahh, yeah, you found it you found it!” she exclaimed as one hind leg began to kick and twitch and she wiggled her back half around to get the fingers to scratch in just the right places.
Unfortunately for Stennulf, he was oblivious and had missed the obvious warning in the words of his equine companion. He stood there scratching her, enjoying the sensation of warm flesh and soft hairs under his fingers, and the faint oinking noises that the pink pony made as she was getting scratched.
He did however, notice that the pink pony went “oink” and it disturbed him slightly. He thought about the ramifications of a pink pony that went “oink” and then reminded himself that he was in a different world, one with pudgy pink ponies, princess ponies, and dragons. Talking ponies. Perhaps he had fallen into the pool and drowned, and all of this was a DMT induced hallucination that was occurring as he died. He had been suffering a drab, dull, drudgery filled existence, so he supposed the change was nice.
The squirming pony emitted a brassy blast from under her tail. She then giggled hysterically and took off to bounce around. “It tickled!” she exclaimed as she bucked out her hind legs a few times.
Stennulf found himself laughing at the prancing pink pony.
“And Twilight says that farts aren’t funny,” Pinkie proclaimed.
“Hey, farts are funny until they have lumps in them… and then they are hilarious ,” Stennulf said to Pinkie as she gamboled around him. He felt his spirits lifted a little by her boisterous behaviour and followed after her as she bounced towards Ponyville.
“Lumpy… like oatmeal? Are you crazy?” Pinkie Pie proclaimed as she lead the way, giggle-snorting as she bounded along. “Oh we are going to be the best of friends!’
The first ponies that saw them responded quite well Pinkie thought. They screamed in panic and then stampeded away, shouting about some horrible monster invading the town.
“He’s not a monster!” Pinkie Pie protested. “He’s a vegetable, a type of bean!”
Stennulf slapped his own face with his hand and let out a groan, but did not correct the pink pony. He stood there as ponies fled before him, watching them go, and feeling a little sad.
Pinkie Pie felt a wave of disappointment crash over her and several of her curls went limp. She always took it personally when somepony didn’t like her friends and she thought briefly of Maud. At least Maud wouldn’t run away. Maud was one of the most curious ponies she knew.
“Sorry Stennulf, I kinda knew that someponies would react badly, but I didn’t think all of them would run away like this,” Pinkie Pie said dejectedly, her change of demeanour quite noticeable to her companion. She felt a gentle tug on her ear and perked up slightly.
Pinkie continued forward, no longer bouncing but walking, her hooves dragging on the ground as she went.
A group of pegasi took off and Stennulf stared.
“Flying ponies?” Stennulf said in awe, still staring upwards, now frozen in place and not moving. His hands clutched together in front of him, and he wrung them fitfully.
“Pegasi,” Pinkie announced. “They’re flighty,” she said with a soft giggle.
“Uh, might be a rude question, but do they just poop everywhere like birds do?” Stennulf asked.
“Only if you scare them enough, they’ll take off and leave a little something behind!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed in return, feeling much better and laughing a little.
“Duly noted,” Stennulf replied while still staring upwards. “Flying ponies.”
“There are unicorns too,” Pinkie said.
“Unicorns, I know what those are. They have horns, right? We have stories about those in my world,” he said as he followed Pinkie further into town. He reached up and wiped his red hair from his eyes and stroked his beard, trying to smooth it down.
Pinkie Pie turned to look at Stennulf and watched him groom himself. “Nervous?” she asked in an overly chirpy voice.
The hooman bean nodded.
“You shouldn’t be, Twilight only destroys things she doesn’t like,” Pinkie Pie announced.
Stennulf gulped loudly and tried to smooth out his filthy stinking shirt. “I look atrocious,” he muttered as he followed Pinkie.
“Well, you could ditch the clothes, I mean, I am not wearing any,” Pinkie quipped. “I’m naked. She’s naked. He’s naked. You… you’re not naked.”
“I can’t run around naked!” Stennulf protested.
“Why not?” Pinkie Pie asked.
“Dangly bits!” Stennulf replied while throwing his hands up in the air in an act of exasperation. “Stuff would dangle out and be right at your eye level!”
“Is it worth looking at?” Pinkie Pie asked with a wicked grin.
“What?” Stennulf replied, feeling a surge of panic.
“Well, I work in a bakery and we put all the really good stuff at eye level so ponies will buy it,” Pinkie tittered.
Stennulf turned beet red and fell silent, ponies still fleeing all around him. The screams were quite disconcerting all things considered, and their reaction did not bode well for his time here.
“I feel bad for the panic I’m causing,” Stennulf confessed.
“Aw, don’t feel bad, I’ve cause far worse, and there was the time when Twilight cast a want it need it spell on her doll, and the whole town ended up brawling,” Pinkie confided.
“Wait, isn’t she the princess pony?” Stennulf asked and he paused mid step for a moment and scratched his head.
“Yep,” Pinkie chirped. “She sure is.”
“Those three ponies just fainted dead away, are they going to be alright?” Stennulf asked in alarm.
“Oh, those three are the flower power gang. They were assaulted by bunnies,” Pinkie explained. “They spook easy.”
“Bunnies?” Stennulf queried in confusion.
“Oh look, our mayor has gone to announce to Twilight that you are coming, she can sure run for a mare her age, look at her go,” said Pinkie as she raised a hoof over her eyes and squinted to see off in the distance. “And heeeeeere comes Twilight!” Pinkie Pie shouted.
Stennulf stared at the small purple pony called an “alicorn” according to Pinkie, and the pony known as Twilight stared up at him, her face full of kindness and curiousity. She was a little timid, but didn’t seem too afraid of him.
Stennulf sat down cross legged upon the ground. It didn’t feel right looking down at Twilight and on the ground, they were about at eye level with one another. Twilight walked in a small circle around him, examining him from all sides.
“Really, I am harmless,” Stennulf promised.
“Still, I’ve had Spike send a letter to Celestia and she is coming,” Twilight replied. “You will have to forgive the townsponies. They tend to overreact occasionally,” she added.
Stennulf plucked a small blade of grass and rolled it between his fingers, watching as his fingers turned slightly green. The grass was certainly more vibrant here. He didn’t know what to make of it.
In the distance was a buttery yellow pegasus who had said nothing so far. She had a muted pink mane and peered at the strange new creature with one eye that peered out from beneath her bangs.
Stennulf let out a yelp of surprise as a hoof touched his ribs and stroked downwards, startling him and giving him a bit of a tickle. Twilight lept away during his exclamation and stated at him with wide eyes.
“What, surprised that I am ticklish just like you?” he asked. He snatched the pink pony and trailed his fingertips over her ribs, which caused her to make a loud “SQUEE!” sound as she took off running and giggling.
“We’re not so different,” Stennulf said as he watched Pinkie Pie run in circles, her tail swishing wildly.
“Um, actually, that is pretty good proof we are different actually,” Twilight said blushing.
“How so?” Stennulf asked politely.
“Well, for you, that may have been a tickle, but for Pinkie Pie, that was more than a tickle,” Twilight said sheepishly.
“She looks tickled pink to me,” Stennulf replied with a hint of humour.
“She sure does,” Fluttershy agreed in a barely audible voice that sounded like it was very strained and more than a little shocked.
“You just gave a tickle to two central erogenous zones on Pinkie Pie, places where a stallion would rub with his forelegs during, uh, well…” Twilight’s voice tailed off as she spoke.
The realisation hit Stennulf like a ton of bricks. “So, uh, tell me Princess, any other areas I should avoid that are, uh, well, best to be avoided?” he asked.
“Well, there are the ears… we engage the ears a lot when we are in certain intimate positions. It is an act of trust not to hurt one another’s ears… and then there is the croup on a female, where a stallion’s weight rests when uh, well, you know. There are other places too… our necks are very sensitive places and much of our social interaction involves neck touching... wow, you look really red. You look really really red Stennulf, are you alright?” Twilight said, looking very embarrassed and worried at the same time.
Stennulf’s eyes shot over to the pink mare, who was bouncing around obliviously. My hands have been all over everything he thought to himself. Stennulf did not reply. He dropped the blade of grass, folded his hands, and placed them in his lap. After doing so, he remained as still as possible.
“Well, this cultural exchange has been fascinating,” Twilight announced.
Stennulf nodded but said nothing.
“You should totally ask him for an ear rub Twilight, it feels fantastic, ” Pinkie Pie suggested.
Stennulf choked. “I didn’t know!” he gasped.
“Misunderstandings happen,” Twilight acknowledged, turning even more purple-urple-er as she spoke.
“It seemed like the right thing to do, I mean, they fit into my hand so well,” Stennulf pleaded. “It wasn’t like I was trying to…” his voice trailed off mid-sentence.
“Well, we don’t have hands like you and minotaurs do. We use our mouths, which makes for very intimate contact… and nobody can fault you for doing something you didn’t know,” Twilight stated. “If anything it shows you are very kind. Very generous even.”
“He sure is!” Pinkie chirped as she flopped over in the grass and rolled around. She giggled as the grass tickled her. “He generously scratched my tuchus,” she reported.
Stennulf fell over backwards and covered his face with his hands. He groaned from embarrassment.
“Kindness is universal and we cannot compare his standards and our own,” Fluttershy said in a soft sweet voice. She came forward shyly and sat down next to the prone human. “I use my feathers to stroke animals on the ears and a touch is just a touch. It seems natural to want to reach out and do that to inspire trust with a creature. Pinkie Pie is a creature. You are a creature.” She leaned down over Stennulf and touched his hands gently with her wing tips.
Stennulf pulled away his hands and looked up at the yellow face up above him. Her bangs hung down so low that they nearly touched his face. She smelled of pine scented soap and a scent he was rapidly associating with these equines, an unknown scent. Her breath smelled faintly of mint. He had no idea how horrible his own breath must have stunk.
“You remind me of Hairy,” Fluttershy said as she studied his face.
“Who is Hairy?” Stennulf replied.
“Hairy is Fluttershy’s bear friend,” Pinkie Pie answered.
“What?” Stennulf asked in disbelief.
“Fluttershy is his chiropractor,” Twilight explained.
“Huh?” Stennulf muttered in confusion.
“Chiropractic practice,” Twilight repeated. “Do you have that in your world? Bad backs and the related science of how to make them feel better?”
“Well yes, I have a somewhat bad back actually, and it has been made worse by all the hard work I’ve been… ack!” cried Stennulf as he was suddenly rolled over. Fluttershy was pressing on his back, her hooves feeling along his spine, running up and down and feeling each vertabrae.
And then, bad things happened.
Stennulf couldn’t tell what happened next exactly. He was twisted one way, and then another, and then for a brief moment, his nose nearly touched his tailbone and he had a clear view of his own backside, which was inches away from his face. And then there were terrible sounds, like somebody grabbing a handful of celery and twisting it until it broke. Then his face was jammed into the ground and he was folded in half, his buttocks almost touching the back of his head, and his feet planted flat on the ground above his shoulders. There was an awe inspiring crackle from his spine followed by a scream of surprise. There was a heavy grunt from the now fierce yellow pegasus as she twisted and folded him in impossible ways, and for a brief moment Stennulf realised that auto-fellatio was possible with the way he was folded. It was a disturbing thought.
And then, it was over and he was left laying flat on his back, gasping, looking up at the sunny skies. He felt marvelous but also very concerned about the unnatural ways he had been bent.
“You poor dear, your spine was so full of knots, I hope I helped,” Fluttershy said sweetly. “Lay still for a while, or you may die suddenly,” she gently warned, her dulcet voice so sweet and alluring.
Panic crept through Stennulf, but he was careful not to move. He drifted euphorically and felt slightly sleepy, even with his panic and his concerns about sudden death. At least his spine felt wonderful.
He took note of how much stronger the little equines were. The delicate yellow pegasus was impossibly strong, and he had no hope of ever matching her strength. A slow creeping realisation was taking place. These were vastly superiour life forms to him. Stronger, faster, and if they were to be believed, capable of magic.
Stennulf realised he was the animal here, the lesser life form. One of these creatures could take him as a pet and there was very little he could do about it. The little yellow pegasus performed chiropracty on bears and he stood no chance of resisting her.
The Other Side of the Mirror
Stennulf relaxed in a hot bath, in a tub that was remarkably similar to one that a human might have in their bathroom. The tub was full of hot water and bubbles, and was a luxury that he hadn't enjoyed for quite a while, ever since he had left civilisation and had gone to live as a hermit. The tub was a little small for him, but he managed.
He couldn't help but notice the dirt ring he was leaving behind.
Some things just couldn't be helped he supposed. He scrubbed his face, working the dirt out of his beard, washed his hair, and then tried to scrape the dirt out from under his fingernails. He was meeting royalty, and he wanted to make sure that he was at least somewhat presentable. He had nothing to shave with, not that he really wanted to shave, but he did want to leave a good impression.
He eyed the toilet, noticing that it was of a similar shape... but there were differences. The bowl was elongated and he tried to think about why. There was probably a very good reason, but he couldn't come up with one. There was a sink, but it was down near his knees, which he supposed was a perfect height for a pony that came up to his waist.
The human in the mirror staring back at him was almost a stranger. He was thin, gaunt looking, his hair was long and his beard was bushy. He was a strange mix of Scandinavian and Creole, which gave him red hair and brown skin. It occurred to him that it didn't matter what race he was anymore, he was human, and he had colour, but that didn't matter because the ponies were every colour you could imagine.
There was a faint knock on the door followed by a gentle reminder to hurry, that time was growing shorter.
Stennulf continued scrubbing and enjoying the feeling of hot water. His feet were rough and scaly. His legs were covered in small sores, which bothered him a bit. His hair was also coming out as he washed, which had been happening for a while now, but at the moment it was very noticeable.
Finally, he stood, released the drain, turned on the water, and rinsed himself free from the bubbles under the low shower head that he had to squat down to stand under. Things were going to be a bit awkward for a while. He also tried to rinse out the tub just a little, but it was of no use. He felt a little bad for being an awful guest.
He stood around in the bathroom and realised he had made a terrible error. All he had to wear were dirty clothes. He heaved a sigh and looked at his filthy clothing he had set on the counter.
“Twilight, uh, anybody out there?” Stennulf inquired as he stood in the bathroom naked.
“Yes?” Twilight answered through the door.
“I have a bit of a problem... I am clean but my clothes are still filthy,” he mentioned.
“So don't wear them, I don't see what the big deal is,” Twilight replied.
“I'd rather not be naked when meeting your Princess Celestia,” Stennulf politely answered.
“But she is going to be naked when she is meeting you,” Twilight argued.
“It is different for you... you come from a culture that is normally naked. I don't,” Stennulf retorted, still trying to be as civil as possible while he struggled to make his point.
Quite without warning the bathroom door flew open and Twilight entered. Stennulf felt an odd tingling sensation all of his body and he was pulled out of the bathroom by an invisible force, being dragged out as Twilight retreated from the room. He was painfully aware that all three of the ponies in the room were staring at him. Twilight eyed him up and down, squinting as she did so, and several rocks suddenly popped into existence, floating over her head. After a several moments of excruciating embarrassment, Stennulf found himself dressed in what appeared to be a nice suit, which somehow, the rocks had turned into.
“Uh, thanks?” Stennulf muttered in confusion.
“Don't mention it. I guess you don't tuck away inside of a sheath. That's interesting,” Twilight observed as she looked the human up and down. “You are remarkably similar to the creatures I met beyond the mirror. Similar body shape, similar hands, similar facial features, but also very different. Your skin is different. So is your hair and your eyes. Your hands are much larger and your fingers seem to be much larger. You are also taller. I am going to have to ask Celestia about it,” Twilight added.
“You've been through another mirror... did you meet humans?” Stennulf asked.
“I am not sure. I met something like you... as stated, similar but also very different,” Twilight admitted as she continued to study Stennulf.
“He looks kinda handsome in a suit,” Pinkie Pie quipped. “I'm not Rarity, but with his chocolate coloured skin I think I might have gone with a grey suit. The blue doesn't look bad though!”
Stennulf bit back a reply about being chocolate coloured, trying to remind himself that racism couldn't possibly exist here. He was, after all, chocolate coloured, and the pony clearly didn't mean her words in a derogatory sense.
“Once the meeting is over, I'll turn your clothing into something a bit more practical for day to day wear if you can help me by telling me what you need. We'll try to get Rarity to make you some clothes as well. She'll appreciate the challenge,” Twilight said as she prodded Stennulf with a hoof.
“This magic stuff is pretty spiffy,” Stennulf remarked as he looked himself over.
“I think fingers are a bit more interesting, but that is just me. I suppose it is a matter of perspectives. I use magic every day and I am used to it, you on the other hoof, er... hand have fingers, and they seem commonplace to you,” Twilight reasoned. “And you are taking this rather well, I mean, dealing with being in our world, encountering magic, everything. I didn't deal with being on the other side of the mirror quite so well. Of course, I also found myself in a body somewhat like yours.”
“I don't know, I think I could handle being a pony,” Stennulf said brashly.
Pinkie Pie tittered. “You know Twilight, you should hold him to that,” Pinkie Pie quipped.
“I think I might,” Twilight said as she flashed a wry smile.
“I could handle being pony, how hard could it be?” Stennulf said as he reached up and tried to smooth back his hair.
“For one, you'd be naked,” Pinkie Pie teased.
“But it is different for a pony,” Stennulf replied. “Where I come from, horses and ponies don't wear clothing.”
“So when Twilight turns you into a pony, you won't mind being naked?” Pinkie asked.
“Why is that? Why is it okay for a pony to be naked but you have a problem being naked? Seeing as how we are both sapient species, why don't you apply the same standards to both?” Twilight questioned.
“I don't know... that is actually a very good question,” Stennulf answered as he took a stunning blow to his sense of what was right.
“It is because he thinks of us as animals,” Fluttershy interjected demurely. “Talking animals perhaps, but animals nonetheless. “This isn't a bad thing... and I don't think he is doing it out of any sense of superiourity... but I know how I am with my own animals, so I think I understand.”
Stennulf could not form the words to make a reply. He stood with one hand stroking his beard, the other on his hip, looking very pensive and thoughtful.
As he stood there trying to figure out his own motivations, there was a sound of a door opening downstairs, which caused Twilight Sparkle to immediately panic, announcing that she wasn't prepared just yet and that the books hadn't been sorted.
“You'll be fine,” Pinkie Pie said encouragingly. “Just be yourself.”
Stennulf wished that he could tell the pony that he hadn't known who he was for quite some time now, but he didn't have the words, nor did he have the time. With timid jerky steps, he followed Twilight Sparkle down the stairs.
There was not one, but two Princesses, and one of them was looking at Stennulf balefully, the blue one. The larger of the two, Princess Celestia, was capable of looking him right in the eye. There was no sign of emotion upon her face, which somehow made Stennulf even more afraid. He knew the blue one didn’t like him.
“I say we deal with this problem right here, and right now,” Princess Luna growled.
“No,” Princess Celestia replied to her sister. “Luna, be calm, we do not know his intent.”
“I do not want to know his intent,” Princess Luna snarled.
“You must forgive my sister,” Princess Celestia said in a cold voice.
“Please don’t hurt him, he’s been nothing but nice,” Pinkie Pie pleaded.
“I have no intention of hurting him Pinkie Pie, and neither does Luna,” Celestia said reassuringly. “But before we continue any further, what were you doing in the castle and how did you bring him here?”
“Well, I was bored, and I had a day off from working in the bakery, and I didn’t have to foalsit, and I really didn’t have to do much of anything at all today, so I went for a walk without really planning on where I was going, I was just going out you see, because it was such a nice day, you know how it is when the day is really nice and you just want to be out, right?” Pinkie Pie paused when she saw Celestia scowling faintly. “Right, sorry, uh, well, I just sort of ended up at the castle somehow and then I wanted to play the big organ that is there, so I did that for a while, it is a lot of fun to play on a big organ and give it a good blow…” Pinkie Pie tittered for a moment, interrupting her own dialogue, but her laughter died when she realised nopony was laughing. Only Stennulf had any reaction, and he was turning purple trying to contain himself. “So after playing on the organ for a long time, I started to explore the rest of the castle, just looking around and stuff, and then I found a secret room, and another secret room, and there was a puzzle, and eventually I found the room with the mirror… so I looked through the mirror and I saw his world on the other side. I touched the mirror and found I could push my hoof through it, so I stepped through the mirror and was in a different world and then I met Stennulf and after we talked for a while he looked into the pool of water that I came out of, and when he was looking I placed both of my hoofsies on his backside and shoved him through and he fell through and landed in the castle on the other side of the mirror now with us, and then the mirror broke for some odd reason and nopony was actually touching it when it broke, I swear,” Pinkie Pie continued.
Princess Celestia took a very deep breath. “Pinkie Pie, I don’t understand how you traveled through that mirror. That mirror was cursed. I am hesitant to explain the nature of the curse given the situation, but that mirror was never meant to be a gate,” Princess Celestia explained patiently.
“The mirror is cursed?” Twilight asked, blinking a few times in curious astonishment. “Please explain… look, you can tell me now or I will figure it out on my own eventually,” Twilight reasoned.
Princess Celestia sighed, realising Twilight Sparkle would do just that. “The mirror was cursed. It was one of Sombra’s many experiments into reflection. That mirror was made to show the viewer their heart’s fondest desire, entrancing them so that they could not look away. Eventually, the mirror would drain and collect the spirit from the viewer, so Sombra could have yet another victim to experiment on,” Princess Celestia explained.
“So the mirror showed me… Stennulf?” Pinkie Pie asked slowly.
“This is why I did not want to bring up the nature of the curse,” Princess Celestia replied in a gentle voice. “We do not even know if the cursed mirror was still working properly.”
“Of course it might be working properly and this could be another case of Pinkie Pie doing her thing,” Twilight interjected.
“There is that,” Princess Celestia admitted.
“What is to be done with the human?” Princess Luna demanded. “I grow weary of this banter!”
“Before we do anything rash, I’d like to learn more about him,” Princess Celestia announced, shooting her sister a harsh glare. “Stennulf, do you mind if I ask you some questions?”
“I will answer anything you ask as honestly as possible,” Stennulf replied, still somewhat distracted by the nature of the mirror and the threatening glances the blue alicorn was giving him.
“Good, because I’d like to avoid all of the mistakes of the past,” Princess Celestia returned, shaking her head sadly. “I must confess, I am just as troubled as my sister is to see one of our most hated enemies back among us once again.”