Titty Barn

Big Macintosh wiped the last bead of sweat from his forehead as he carried the last barrel of apples to the barn. With the chores done for the day, it was time to go home, have a nice, big glass of apple cider, and take a nice, long nap...

"HEY BIG BRO!"

Big Macintosh had little time to react as Apple Bloom immediately leaped onto his neck, hugging him affectionately. Big Macintosh let out a small yelp as Apple Bloom hugged him tighter, choking him unintentionally.

"Apple...Bloom..." Big Macintosh choked out. "Not...so...tight..."

"Oops. Sorry," Apple Bloom said as she let go of Big Macintosh's neck. "So, y' need any help?"

Big Macintosh shook his head. "Eenope."

"Uh...y' sure? Ah mean, y' need something? Anything?"

Big Macintosh let out a groan. "What is it now?" he muttered while giving Apple Bloom one of his serious faces.

Apple Bloom put on a cheerful grin. "What are you talking about?! Ah'm just tryin' to help out mah big brother!"

Big Macintosh's face did not change.

Apple Bloom let out a defeated sigh. "Alright, there's this totally cool place downtown called the Titty Barn!"

"What's that?"

"The Titty Barn! It's a really cool place where you can..."

Big Macintosh's face refused to change.

"Alright, Ah've never been there. But I heard Pinkie Pie talking about it and it sounds so cool! Ah wanted to go there, but this stupid minotaur up in the front won't let me in because he said Ah'm a minor! So Ah was hopin' you could talk to him and convince him-"

Big Macintosh's serious look upgraded into an angry look. Apple Bloom bit her lip as she looked down in the ground.

"Ah guess not..." she mumbled as she slowly walked away.

Big Macintosh's face became confused as he wondered why his little sister wanted to go to this 'Titty Barn' place. He sighed as he realized he had to go find out by himself. He could almost hear his bed laughing at him as he walked away.

After asking directions from a couple of ponies, Big Macintosh finally found the place. It was a rather big barn, painted purple and pink. He stared at the sign on the front. It depicted a silhouette of a human girl above the words "TITTY BARN".

Big Macintosh raised an eyebrow. *What is that...creature up there?* he thought as he continued to stare at the barn.

He shrugged as he opened the door. As he entered, he saw a giant purple minotaur in a tuxedo. *This must be the 'stupid minotaur' Apple Bloom was talking about...*

The minotaur stared at Big Macintosh. "Ya wanna go in?"

"Eeyup," Big Macintosh replied.

"Ten bit cover," the minotaur replied back.

Thankful that he'd brought some bits with him, Big Macintosh paid the minotaur, who stepped out of the way to let Big Macintosh in.

The red stallion stared at his surroundings, seeing tables, a wood bar, and a large stage with three poles in the center. Almost the entire barn was illuminated only by light from dim lanterns and neon signs. Deciding he should at least have a drink, Big Macintosh walked up to the bar, meeting a tan unicorn stallion with a black mane, who Big Macintosh assumed was the bartender.

The bartender smiled. "What can I get you, my friend?"

Big Macintosh only stared at the bartender, then the drinks.

The bartender let out a small chuckle. "Not the talkative type, I see. I recommend the apple martini."

Big Macintosh only replied with a silent nod. As the bartender began to prepare the drink, Big Macintosh noticed that there were a lot of stallions in the barn. As he began to wonder why, the bartender handed him his drink.

"Enjoy!" The bartender said as Big Macintosh placed a few bits next to the bartender. Big Macintosh thanked the bartender as he grabbed his drink with his teeth. He headed towards a table and set his drink down. He sat down and began to drink his martini. It was pretty delicious.

His thoughts on his drink were shattered as he suddenly heard music playing through the speakers on stage.

Suddenly, the lights turned to light red as a human girl with tan skin and a black ponytail appeared from the curtains. The girl wore a sexy red mask, exposing her red eyes. She wore a short red skirt, a crimson blouse, and was barefoot. The amount of red grabbed Big Macintosh's attention, yet he had no idea what was coming next.

As the girl walked up the stage, she let out a playful wink and began to dance on stage. Big Macintosh let out a raised eyebrow. "That's it? Just dancing? Ah bet Apple Bloom woulda been-"

His thoughts were interrupted when the girl took off her blouse, revealing her scarlet bra. She threw her blouse to a random table, delighting the stallion sitting at the table. She began to dance on the pole, swinging on it. The barn was now filled with many stallions cheering. As she continued to swing, she took off her mask and threw it on stage. She got off of the pole and proceeded to remove her skirt, revealing her red-violet panties, which made stallions yell with excitement. Finally, she unbuttoned her bra and removed it, revealing her breasts as she continued to dance.

As the whole barn almost exploded from the cheers of stallions, Big Macintosh only widened his eyes to the size of dinner plates. The girl threw her bra to Big Macintosh's table, spilling his drink. Yet, Big Macintosh could care less about that. With his eyes still wide, he slowly stood up and left the table.

As he exited out of the Titty Barn, he let out a big sigh and thought to himself that if Apple Bloom, Applejack, or Granny Smith asked where he'd been, he would change the subject to Cheerilee, since it was, in his opinion, easier to explain.