I am not a dog

by The Hand of Pony

Questions and wild theories

Previous Chapter

It had been just under a week since Fluttershy's return to Equestria, time she had spent re-aquainting herself with her friends and her animals and by purchasing a large dog bed. Apparently young habits died pretty hard too.

All in all her re-introduction had been pretty seamless. Most of that had down to the fact that, to Fluttershy's surprise, only a week had passed in Equestria. Most ponies assumed she had gone to visit relatives or something; a lie she was willing to entertain since telling everypony you've spent five months as a dog in a different dimension would probably cause comment. Especially considering that she would also have to explain how she managed to fit five months into the space of a week.

Apart from that everything was fine apart from one or two small issues. For example, Applejack now had to keep Winona as far from her as possible otherwise she tended to run away and growl at the confused canine from a distance. The number of grey, fluffy cats living with her also seemed to be multiplying on a daily basis. She had also been reluctant to part with her collar, claiming she felt strangely naked without it. She did remove the tag though; if everypony was going to ask about the collar she might as well save herself the aggravation of explaining why the tag said Flossy as well.

So far no one had mentioned the collar, thankfully, although ponies did have a tendency to look away blushing after they noticed it. She was also pretty sure Thunderlane had started to secretly stalk her from a distance, or at least he tried to be secretive but he was really easy to spot with the huge wing-boner he was sporting.

Today was a day she had been looking forward to. After telling her story to the others, Twilight had promised to do her best to provide answers to the many questions Fluttershy had. They were all going to meet at Rarity's place, since their usual meeting spot at the library had been blown up, and none of them seemed comfortable with Twilight's new castle...tree...thing yet.

The location wasn't important though, getting answers was.


"Right, thanks for coming girls. As you know, Fluttershy, after telling us what happened, asked me a lot of questions that I said I'd do my best to answer." Clearly Twilight was in full exposition mode today. "I'll be honest with you though. I really don't have any solid answers for you since trying to gather hard evidence on things that happened in another dimension is really...hard."

"Oh its ok Twilight, possible explanations are better than no explanations at all." She smiled encouragingly at Twilight, who blushed in return.

"Well...yes. Thanks Fluttershy. So...what do you want to know first?"

"I think what I really want to know most is why everyone there thought I was a dog."

Twilight frowned but nodded. "Ok well the thing is, without being there to study it I really don't know what the reason could be. You said you weren't actually physically transformed?"

"No, I was definitely still me. It’s just that they couldn't tell I had wings or anything."

Twilight went silent, deep in thought with her hoof cradling her chin. She was still like that a minute later when Rainbow burst out "Hello? Equestria to Twilight! Anyone home?"

"Sorry. I was just thinking, what if instead of transforming you, the transformation was in the eyes and minds of the humans." All she got were blank stares. "It’s more like a really advanced illusion that effected their entire conscience. So instead of just looking like a dog, you also sounded like one to them. If they touched your hoof, their mind would tell them it’s actually a paw. They never saw your wings because their mind just blanked them out thinking a dog couldn't possibly have wings. Any strange behaviour would be forcibly ignored because dogs wouldn't do stuff like that!" She was looking very pleased with herself now. "It’s so simple!" she exclaimed with a little hoof-clap.

Fluttershy didn't look so convinced, the others just looked confused. "I don't know Twilight; an illusion wouldn't make me start thinking like a dog."

"Oh, well its possible tha-."

She was interrupted by Spike. "Actually I might know why that could happen." Twilight pouted slightly at being talked over but motioned for him to continue. "When we went through that mirror to that other world and I became a dog I started doing dog things like scratching myself and liking tickles and dog treats and other stuff like that. Maybe what happened to Fluttershy also affected her mind making her think like a dog."

Twilight raised a hoof. "..." she lowered her hoof again. "Y'know what, that's actually pretty reasonable. Good job Spike." Spike beamed at the compliment.

"But why didn't the animals treat me like another dog?"

"As you of all ponies should know, animals tend to be very perceptive. They could probably tell you weren't an actual animal, but couldn't tell what you really were. So they just kinda ended up staring at you, unable to express themselves.

"Oh. Well I suppose that sort of makes sense.

"So what's next Fluttershy?"

"Um, I would like to know why I couldn't fly."

"Oh, well that's simple enough. Pegasus flight actually requires large amounts of magical energy to work, since, aerodynamically speaking, pegasi wings are too small to provide adequate lift, or any lift really, on their own. Most of this energy comes from the magic that saturates our world. In a world that lacks that kind of freely available magic a Pegasus wouldn't be able to get enough energy to fly."

Rainbow looked disgusted. "Well that would suck!"

Fluttershy just looked at the floor, thinking of all the falls she could have avoided if she had known that small factoid. "Oh yes, it sucked."

"I'm also certain," Twilight continued "that if Rarity or I had gone in your place we wouldn't have been able to use our magic."

"Ugh, perish the thought."

"It may also explain why you couldn't use your hooves very well. We don't really know how we can pick things up with our hooves since they aren't exactly flexible." She tapped a hoof on the floor for emphasis. "Current theory suggests a pony’s ability with her hooves is tied in with their integral magic, so in a place without magic that ability is lost too."

Applejack raised a hoof.

"You don't need to raise your hoof Applejack..."

"Oh...uh, right. So if it were me or Pinkie that went to that world, what'd we lose?"

Twilight thought for a moment. "If I were to hazard a guess you would lose your connection to the land around you, maybe find yourself losing stamina and getting tired easier. That and the hoof thing would be more noticeable since earth pony’s hooves are even more dextrous than unicorn or pegasi hooves."

Pinkie looked horrified. "Does that mean I wouldn't be able to make super yummy cakes and stuff!?"

"I'm not sure how you came to that conclusion but yes, you could still bake stuff, it'd just be a lot harder not being able to pick things up."

"Phew! Well that's a relief. At least now I know I could build myself a pie fort and a yummy arsenal to fight my way out if I found myself in dog-world."

Twilight shook her head. She suspected that if Pinkie ever found herself in Fluttershy's position no-one would ever believe she was anything other than a Pinkie Pie. "Next question Fluttershy?"

Rainbow spoke up instead. "Ooh ooh! Ask her about the time difference thing!"

"Um...ok. Time difference...thing. How was it a week here but five months there?"

"Weeeelllll...the short answer is I don't know. I mean there's nothing saying different dimensions have to work on the same time scale."

"So how much faster than us was it?" asked Rainbow, who seemed to be displaying a strange interest in this.

"Seeing as how it was a week here but five months there, roughly twenty times faster." she answered, giving Rainbow a strange look.

"So if I went there I'd be moving twenty times faster? I'd be Equestria's fastest Pegasus ever!" She looked around at the synchronized face-hoof the others did. "What?"

Applejack was the first to answer her. "Two problems sugarcube. Firstly, ya wouldn't be able t' fly, and secondly I'm pretty sure ya have to actually be in Equestria to be Equestria's fastest Pegasus..."

"That and it wouldn't actually feel any faster from your perspective." Twilight added as she watched Rainbow cultivate a very sheepish grin.

"Well, it was only an idea..."

"Not your best one darling," Rarity said "which is saying a lot. So Fluttershy, what's your next question?"

"The next question I have is-."

"Wait wait wait!" Pinkie shouted over her. "If time was twenty times faster there and we gave her three of our days to escape, how much time did she have in that world?"

"She would have had about two months."

"What!?" shouted Fluttershy. "Two months! I had two whole months! Arrgh!" She headbutted the floor. "No wonder you were surprised to see me so soon."

"Sorry Fluttershy. If I had known I would have said. Anyway you had another question?"

"Yes. I wanted to know why-."

"Wait wait wait!" Pinkie shouted, interrupting again.

"Yes...Pinkie?" Twilight said getting irritated at the amount of interruptions that had occurred in the last ten minutes.

"What if she hadn't made it and we had to wait for that crystally cyni-ini-ini-omature to recharge, how long would she have been stuck there?"

Twilight went quiet for a moment as she did the maths. "Depending on how long the Cynosure took to recharge at one to two months, she could have been there from a year and a half to over three years." Fluttershy just shuddered in response. "But...you know, I'm sure we could have found another method besides that." she added, quickly.

"Boy oh boy Fluttershy! You were lucky you got out as fast as you did. I mean three years stuck as a dog? Wow! You'd have been nuttier than two birds in a peanut eating contest!"

"Still not as nutty as you..." Rainbow muttered under her breath.

"Thank you Pinkie." said Twilight, stopping Pinkie before she could traumatize Fluttershy further with bad analogies. "Your next question Fluttershy."

"Um...why was it so hard to bring me back?"

"Well trans-dimensional portals aren't exactly simple but ok I'll try to explain it. A portal works by taking whatever enters it and turning it into a ball of magical energy. That ball then gets shot on a stream of magic from one end to the other, and re-materializes at the end in a process that takes micro-seconds. Now this stream feeds on magic from one end, taking it to the other, or if your portal works both ways magic enters at both ends and exits at both ends. In a world like ours there is plenty of magic to feed through the portal, but the world you were in lacked that magic so we had to find a way to make the portal and feed a load of magic through it to create a flow of magic coming back." She looked at them while tapping her hooves together. "Does that make sense?"

The others looked to each before replying. "Sure!" "Totally!" "Absolutely." "Yep yep yep!" "Um...a little bit"

Twilight wiped her brow with relief. "That's good because I just simplified it to the point that it was barely even accurate. Anywaaay...any more questions?"

"Yes, just one. I want to know how did I even get to that place?"

Suddenly everypony else looked as awkward as Twilight felt, except for Pinkie who was bouncing on her hooves in total obliviousness of the sudden change in the room.

"Ah, well...you see, the thing is...it may have possibly...been…my fault."

"Oh?" Fluttershy said pleasantly.

"After the whole Tirek thing and we got those new powers from the tree of harmony, I started thinking. What if we all needed to get together at the same place really quick in an emergency? So I started working on a summoning spell that I could use to bring you all to me. I had worked the spell out, or at least I thought I had, and was about to test it but something went wrong..."

"Hold on darling. You didn't mention that bit before. You mean to tell us that you were going to test a new, unused and potentially dangerous spell by summoning us to your castle as we slept?"

"Um...yes?" Twilight replied, with a nervous laugh. She looked around at the cold stares she was receiving. "So I miiight have got a little excited at the idea of testing it that I forgot it would drag you to the castle in the middle of the night."

Fluttershy cleared her throat. "So...you were saying something went wrong."

"Uh...yes. When I cast the spell instead of doing what it was meant to it created a weird ball of energy that in simple terms, stretched the fabric of our dimension until it met the fabric of the other one. It then sort of turned into a portal. I tried to stop it but it kept feeding on my magic so I tried to throw it as far as I could, hoping to break the connection. It did but it seems that the portal picked you up on the way." Twilight wished Fluttershy would stop asking questions now.

"So why me?"

"The spell was attuned to only work on you five which is why it didn't pick anyone else up. It shouldn't have gotten you either but it seems that when I threw it towards the Everfree it was close enough to you to pick you up."

"Ok. Why did it go wrong?"

Twilight cringed before answering. Fluttershy had asked the one thing she really didn’t want her to. "I made a small mistake in the power infusion ratio." She tried to grin but it died under Fluttershy's stare. "I, uh...forgot to carry the two..."

“Those darn two’s should stop being so lazy and learn to carry their own weight!” said Pinkie, full of conviction.

Fluttershy got up and walked over to Twilight before sitting down right in front of her.

"You forgot to carry the two..."

"Uh, yes. That'd be exactly what happened."

"I got sent to a different dimension because you...forgot to carry the two."

Twilight was almost collapsing under the weight of Fluttershy's silent rage. "Yep..."

"I spent five months eating dog food in a different dimension because you forgot to carry the two."

Twilight barely felt able to squeak a reply. "Uh-huh."

"I'm really sorry about this Twilight."

"Huh?"

Fluttershy swung a right hook that planted Twilight right on the jaw with a crack that made her fly several meters backward and made the others cringe in sympathy.

"Sorry Twilight." Fluttershy said again suddenly looking very small and guilty. Twilight sat up and spat out a tooth.

"'S'ok. I probably deserved that." She rubbed her jaw with a hoof. Damn Fluttershy could throw a mean punch. She was also going to have to look up that tooth growing spell. "I'm sorry Fluttershy."

"No, I'm sorry for hitting you."

“No. I’m sorry for sending you to another dimension.”

“Sorry.”

“Sorry.”

"Sorry." "Sorry." they said together before hugging; it wasn’t in the least bit awkward which was odd considering that Twilight was dripping a bit of blood from her muzzle onto Fluttershy’s coat, and looked really tense in her embrace.

“Soooo…” said Rainbow questioningly “How does forgetting a two change a summoning spell into a portal to another dimension?”

Twilight opened and closed her mouth a few times. “I have no idea.” She finally admitted.


Author's Note

Look! Spike contributed!

Anyway, I think I covered most things although I did write this while horribly ill and without any sleep the night before so I might have forgotten something.

Won't be around for a couple of weeks since I'll be busy at work then I'll start work on Alicorn in Wonderland. Watch this space.