Big Macintosh's Big Fat Wedding

by neorenamon

Before Big Macintosh came into view of the mine entrance, he made sure his mule was well hidden. He didn't want his ass to get in his way while negotiating with the guards. It didn't seem like it was all that long ago that he was effectively at war with them.

"Halt stranger!" called one of the guards as he came into view, "State your name and business!"

"Howdy fellas," he replied amiably, "Mah name is Sir Big Macintosh and I need ta see yer Shaman about somethin real important."

"Let me check the list," said the dog as he looked back, "I don't see you. Perhaps if you come back in a week or so..."

"Y'all don't git it!" he retorted, "Someone's comin here ta steal alla yer gold!"

"Hah. I'd like to see them try. But sorry, we can't let you past."

"Then I reckon ah'm sorry too," he replied as he activated his suit of plate mail armor.

"Get'em boys!" shouted the guard as several of them moved to attack him.

Big Mac started punching the guards in the head, knocking them down one after another. But for each one he knocked down, another two came rushing out to attack him. He wondered how long it would take to overwhelm him. Twenty guards later, he found out.

"Ah tell ya I gotta see yer Shaman fer yer own good!" he hollered as they held him down.

"What all is for our own good over here?!" asked a deep gravelly voice from behind them.

"Shaman?!" asked several guards at once.

"Gold Talon is gonna rob ya blind!" replied Big Mac, "He's gonna use some kinda gas ta knock ya all out afore he sucks alla yer gold from yer reserves! Y'all gotta listen ta meh!"

"Let him us over there boys!!" ordered the Shaman.

"So ya believe me?" he asked as he was let up.

"I believe that Gold Talon would be so bold to try a stunt like that," he answered.

"Can ya do somethin ta stop a gas attack?"

"Now that we've been warned over here," replied the Shaman as he turned around, "There are things we can do."

"Ah'm glad," he said, "I don't think even y'all deserve ta have alla yer hard work taken away from ya."

"Even though you served as one of our mine slaves?"

"Dwelling on the past ain't gonna make nuthin right," he replied.

"I see," he answered, "but I got a feeling over here that you have some other things troubling you?"

"Well mah wife and some close friends are acting strange," he admitted, "but there ain't no collar on them."

He paused to look back for a moment before he replied, "We only use collars on our bitches, but griffons have more subtle means of control for theirs. Collars are too obvious when open slavery is illegal."

"Can ya fix such a thing?"

"No," he replied, "Griffon magic is slightly different than ours. But we do have something over here that might just disrupt the griffon's control over somepony for about a day or so. We use such things when someone is collared by mistake, and that don't happen very often."

"Would ya do that fer me?"

"Well as long as yer protecting dog interests like pony interests, it only seems fair to help you look out for yer own."

"That's mighty kind of ya, but if ya need a return favor in tha future..."

"We can cross dat bridge when we get there," he replied, "Jus wait here while I fetch that control disruptor for you." He turned to the guards as he added, "Get guards on all of the ventilation shaft openings over there. I don't want no surprise attacks on this here mine before we are ready for them!"

He hoped he wasn't making himself obligated to the dogs for any big favors, but he felt he couldn't make exceptions right then.