Author's Note

Names were changed to protect the delicate genitalia of others. This is how this fic came to be.

Other guy

Anyways, does it disturb anyone else how unoriginal and sheeplike the fanfiction community tends to be? We have all these people who just end up stealing someone else's idea which wasn't even that good to begin with. Do that and repeat it 5,000 times.

Me

let's be original!

Me

Does Celestia keep Starswirl's mummified cock as a dildo?

Other:

"why can't she have kids?— Sir. Hat Of Honigar, Yesterday 2:51" Because her vag is like the Bermuda Triangle and any stallion who tries to impregnate her ends up getting lost in the city of Rapture.

Me:

Everypony who has sex with Celestia gets sucked into some pocket dimension

Other:

What do we call this?

Other

The Triangle

Me:
[7/7/2014 2:56:29 PM] Sir. Hat Of Honigar: So, does this mean planes and boats can come through fa
[7/7/2014 2:56:32 PM] Sir. Hat Of Honigar: OH FUCK
[7/7/2014 2:56:34 PM] Sir. Hat Of Honigar: BEST HIE EVER
[7/7/2014 2:56:42 PM] Sir. Hat Of Honigar: Ship lost in bermuda triangle
[7/7/2014 2:56:54 PM] Sir. Hat Of Honigar: slips into equestria through Celestia's vagina

And on that day our savior was born.

Kraken

Several thousand years earlier.

Celestia limped around the Everfree Castle. Her plot ached, her hooves were like jelly, and her stomach was horridly unsettled. She was in a horrid state, only made worse by the massive amounts of guards in the throne room. The usual death threat came in from her current stalker, nothing to be taken too serious, but her guard captain disagreed.

She took a hard turn into her throne room, trotting slowly towards the twin thrones of the celestial princesses. Her flank continued to ache and churn as her stomach gurgled. Something horrible was manifesting itself in her backside, and only time would tell how destroyed the castle's pluming would be.

"Princess!" Celestia's guard captain trotted up to her, "You look ill, are you alright?"

Celestia adjusted her back legs, prancing in place. "I'm fine, just a little upset--" she stopped dead as a warm squishyness invaded her. A violent internal thrashing cause a few pulses of disgusting pleasure through her pelvis. "No-ooo- I'm not okay...s-s-somepony find the doct--" She stopped once again, the thrashing growing more violent as the tight fitted object massaged her body.

Only when a loud and continuous slapping filled the throne room did somepony pipe up. "...Celestia, there's a fish tail in your- erm- vagina...."

Everything held still as the slapping grew louder. Celestia just stared ahead, red in the face and sporting a strange expression. She was holding back the pleasure, trying to force the creature from her body. Little by little the fresh fish was pushed free, shooting out across the floor with a loud, pop, and sliding to a stop on the greaves of a far off guard.

Time stood still as a loud dripping accompanied the flopping fish. Celestia's body refused to stop leaking a warm trickle of water from her snatch. She spread her legs, letting the drip grow to a small spray, showing the guards behind them something that would turn them homosexual for the rest of their lives.

Then, just as suddenly, and with a loud jittery scream from Celestia, a massive tentacle flung from her sex. Everypony in the room took a step back, Celestia moaning softly as the wiggly tentacle slammed sloppily into the floor of the main hall, throwing the tip out and crushing the fish into chum. Celestia braced herself as the massive octopus arm slithered back inside her, disappearing into the briny shallow of Celestia's box, followed by a strange grumble and burble, sending bubbles from her body.

The room was dead still, everypony in shock over the otherworldly display. Celestia's captain let out a rough cough and walked over, "Celestia...are you--"

In a flash the tentacle shot out once again, slamming into the wall of the castle, an angry screech of an ocean born soul cried out in rage as another tentacle threw itself into the other wall, sticking its suckers to the wall and pulling. Celestia dug her hooves into the stone floor of the castle and held on for dear life as the massive creature in her cunt started pulling its slimy body from her magical void.

The guards dropped their weapons as more and more tentacles flung free, slamming into everything and everypony they could reach. Before long eight angry tentacles were working in tandem to pull itself from Celestia's tight hot muscle. Gushing seawater sprayed the guards as they tried to stab the tentacles, only serving to get them grabbed and flung about the room. "Buuuuuck, my ass hurts so much!" Celestia screamed, her backside nearly numb from the violent birth of the sea.

The steps up to the throne were covered in seaweed and tentacle slime, the creature crying out in pure rage as it started pulling the bulbous mass of the octopus' body from Celestia's rear. Celestia herself started dragging herself forward, screaming in confused ecstasy as the bumpy skinned creature slid past her squeezing form. "It's coming, it's coming!" she screamed, dragging herself forward.

And with a final pull from the tentacles, the Kraken pulled free of Celestia, laying across the lower floor of the throne room and trashing its tentacles angrily. Shrill screams echoed around as more and more guards converged towards the deep sea scene. Celestia's captain just paced around the room, holding his helmet under his hoof and sitting, his retirement would have to be pushed up and his happy life would have to be put on hold.

Celestia felt a rough shiver from her asshole to the tip of her horn, "Buuuck my ass!" she screamed, legs trembling as a new fluid joined the soaked floor. Her wings flared out for a moment before snapping back to her side and leaving her in a warm afterglow. Her senses returned quickly as a pony was hurled past her head, slamming into the far wall only to be grabbed by a tentacle and dragged back to the angry giant terrorizing her throne room.

She watched the massive red beast flail about, smashing windows and screeching. The massive arms of the angry octopus slammed into everything, ponies screaming their heads off as the octopus flailed them about.

"Sister, I heard--" Luna stopped dead at the exit, staring at Celestia standing spread legged with a giant octopus behind her. "...a noise...."

Celestia just started laughing as she wobbled her way toward Luna, "Luna, Wooooona, I just came life! I am the sun, I bring life!" she started cackling as she lurched towards the exit, "Luna...take care of this...I need a shower."

As Celestia left, locking the door behind her, Luna stood tall. She levitated a tricorne from her saddlebags and slammed it onto her head, "Avast ye' creature of death, you shall fall to my magic, and join the moon in its silence!" she shouted, lowering her horn the the creatures eye, "For the kingdom!"