Let Sleeper Dogs Lie

Let Sleeper Dogs Lie

by neorenamon

When Mistress Rarity suggested that Spike get some quality time with Bakabaka, he figured she was going to want the whole place to herself.  So he convinced her to spend the night at the Library with him.  After all, Twilight Sparkle was over at Sweet Apple Acres overnight to help plan the wedding of Sir Big Macintosh and Dame Jifar Macintosh.  All he had to do was send away the owl and they'd have the run of the place.  And there was a few surprises he'd been holding onto for just such an occasion.

"Oh how does our love bloom?" asked Bakabaka, "To once again see Master's room."

"I've been keeping a few toys set aside for this night, my dear," he sighed as he looked into her eyes.

"How this just sounds so right," she sighed back, "It shall surely be a delight."

As they approached the Library tree, they could both see a silhouette pass overhead.  A small book dropped at his feet.

"Owlicious!" he called, "Watch where you're dropping things!  You almost hit us!"

She paused to pick up the book and handed it over to him.

Looking at the book, he read the cover aloud.  "Equestrian - Owl Phrase Book?" he asked.  Looking up, he asked, "What's the deal with this?"

The owl landed on a nearby street sign and began hooting.

"Okay okay," he replied, "I'll translate."  He began flipping pages as the owl continued.

"Your grandmother's stuck in her root cellar?"

Owlicious shook his head 'no'.  He hooted the phrase over again.

"Fondle my buttocks?!"

The owl shook it's head 'no' much faster.

"Cut down the tallest tree in the forest wiiiiiiiiiith a herring?"

It hooted and flew down to his shoulder.  Leaning down, it turned the pages with it's beak and point at one.

"Dogs have broken into the Golden Oak Library and they're trashing the place?!"

The owl nodded it's head quickly.  Taking the owl gently in his hands, he perched the bird on Bakabaka's head.

"You two find some help fast!  I'm going in to find out what the deal over there is!"

She nodded as she ran off.  Spike slipped around the side so he could climb the tree and enter the Library through Twilight's bedroom balcony.  As he scaled the side with his claws, he could hear disturbances inside on the upper and lower levels.

"It's lucky no one's around," grumbled one of the dogs, "You idiots make enough noise to wake the dead."

"We are warriors, not cat burglars," snarled another.

"How do we even know it's here?" whined a third, "She could have taken it back to Canterlot for safe keeping!"

"Because our spy said it was here!" snapped the first, "and they haven't led us astray yet!  Just keep tearing everything until we find it!  Be sure to tear everything off the walls in case there's a hidden panel or safe around!"

Spike hooked his hand over the rail and pulled himself over it.  He noticed the glass door were closed, but he knew just how to get past the latch.  Looking around inside, he could see no signs of activity.  But the room was torn apart.  Sneaking up to double doors, he slipped a claw through the gap between the doors and opened the latch quietly.  He heard somedog creeping down the stairs even as he approached.

"Break open any book with a strap and latch on it!" said the second, "Those brainy types just love to hide stuff in hollow books!"

"How do you know that?" asked the first.

"Somedog read it to me from a book."

He crept to the stairs and looked down.  Dogs were crawling around with candle lanterns.  The place was a disaster.  Every pot was smashed, every picture and frame crushed, and every book shelf tipped onto the floor.  The central carpet was torn to pieces.  Spike was getting quite upset at seeing all of his hard work undone.

"Well if we can't find this thing and get it to Prince Blueblood," he replied, "The Shaman is gonna turn us into kibble!"

"How can he find us from the mines when we're heading back to the dog village?"

"You idiot!  He obviously is all but all knowing and all seeing!"

Spike knew that he couldn't risk breathing fire around all that paper, and yet there was just too many to take on alone.  He went back to Twilight's dresser to see if she had anything that could help.  He picked up a short rod that said in glowing runes on the side, "EVERBURNING HEATLESS TORCH:  Guaranteed for life (unless you're an alicorn Princess)".  Then he pulled an empty pot that was used to hold Twilight's favorite nuts.

Then he boldly strode over to the top of the stairs as he lit the torch and said, "Hasn't anypony told you that dogs make lousy cat burglars?!"

"He has a torch in a Library?!" asked the first, "IS HE NUTS?!"

"Oh yes," he hissed, "Strict orders from Princess Twilight herself:  If anypony breaks into the Library looking for the thing, I am to burn it all down and everypony inside!  I think that includes dogs!"

He raised the jar over his head as it to throw it when the dogs panicked and fled towards the door at full speed.  Spike smirked as the dogs burst through the door and ran right into a wide net.  He figured it wouldn't take the owl long to lead the Guards over since a dozen or so were permanently stationed there just to protect Princess Twilight.  Blowing out the torch, he stuck it in his belt as he walked downstairs.  He noticed a dog had dropped his lantern, but it didn't break and just landed on its base.  It was just a little odd that the candle kept burning.

Flash Sentry rushed in and shouted, "Princess Twilight?!  Are you alright?!"

"Ah," he replied, "She's still over planning a big wedding at Sweet Apple Acres.  I'm sure she's fine."

"Oh, that's good to know!" he said, and then as an afterthought, "Are you alright, Spike?"

"I'm great!" he replied, "I climbed in through Princess Twilight's balcony and scared them witless by pretending I was going to burn the Library down around their heads!"

"I should check you just in..." he said as he accidentally kicked the dropped lantern.  It skittered across the room, shattered against a fallen book case, and the lose candle set one of the books on fire.  Spike rushed over to stomp out the burning book.

"Whew," said Spike.  The book was partly burning on the pages away from the binding.

"Sorry," said Flash quickly.

"Well compared to the rest of the damage they did," he laughed nervously, "I doubt it's going to make Twilight any more upset that she's already going to be."

"We shall haul the dogs back to Canterlot to question them at once!"

He waved Flash over as he said softly, "But let's keep this little incident on the down-low.  No need to fuel the rumor mill back in Canterlot, right?"

"Of course, I shall only discuss the matter with Celestia and Luna... once they return in the morning."

Spike nodded as he wondered if her should mention what the dogs had said.  He decided not to tell, as he feared it may well get back to Prince Blueblood, and if he was involved with the Diamond Dogs, worried about possible retribution against Twilight's friends in Ponyville.