Celestia

The white alicorn had just finished her morning breakfast when the dragonfire deposited a letter in front of her — is was as follows:

Dear Celestia,

I give up. I quit. There is no way that I can continue my studies in magic when the

universe has no set laws, where the capricious will of the cosmos determines that

‘Star Maths’ and ‘Wishy Thinking’ are the fundamental philosophies upon which

the universe is built. In short, it would be irrational of me to seek understanding of

a non-rational world using methods of rationality.

Your Former Student,

Twilight Sparkle

Celestia would have been hurt if the whole thing weren’t so puzzling and irregular. As it was the millennia-old alicorn thought it would be best to let her cool off and then visit her in a few days. Whatever it was would probably have been taken care of by then, and if it hadn’t then that’s when it would be.

‘A simple solution for a simple problem.’ Celestia smiled to herself as she levitated a teapot up to pour another cup of tea.

Author's Note

And that, my dear students, is how Spacestar Ordering destroyed one of Equestria's most promising students.
Remember: It's not a religion, it's a cult.