Oh look, Equestria

Oh look, Equestria

Chapter 3 - Hail, and well met!

".....Why are there unicorns in my bedroom?" Yeah, that's the best I got. What the hell is going on? I'm meant to be having a tea party as Death with Barney the dinosaur! (Yes, I remembered my dream, oddly enough) Now, I'm looking at 4 unicorns of varying shape and size, as well as looking like they just jumped into a tub of finger paints.

Big Whitey's amused expression seemed to grow upon hearing my question, and began to respond when she was cut across by a rather rude pink unicorn all up in mah grill soooon. "Hey! I'm not a unicorn silly, I'm an earth pony! I'm Pinkie Pie, and you're a weird alien monkey thing that I've never seen before! Do you like cake? I like cake, what flavor do you like? *GASP* can you even eat cake? Do you like parties? How old are you? I'm 19! Are you a robot?" she finished with an innocent smile.

What the shit? 'They talk, well... That's a thing.' I thought to myself, before replying with "Yes, vanilla, yes, no, 20, no" she seemed to deflate a little, and I swear I heard a pop from somewhere.... She seemed ready to ask another round of questions when SHE was interrupted by yet another voice, the boring looking purple one before.

"Pinkie Pie! What are you doing?! Get over here!" Purps shouted to 'Pinkie Pie', she responded by saying something about Loki and literally bouncing over back to her friend with audible 'boings' when her feet hooves? Touched the floor. Sitting up and resting my back on the headboard of my bed, I got a good look at my surroundings, and this wasn't my bedroom...

I seemed to be in a weird library of sorts, wood surrounded me wherever I looked.. Wood walls, wood floor, wood tables.. Chairs.. Book cases.. Busts.. Wow, unicorns like wood. I was brought out of my sight seeing by a rather regal voice.

"Greetings, I am princess Celestia, and this is Pinkie Pie, princess Twilight Sparkle, and my sister, also fellow princess, Luna. As Pinkie stated, she is an earth pony, whereas we three are alicorns, we hold the traits of unicorn, pegasus and earth ponies in our blood." announced Big Whitey as she took a step forward and gestured toward each per...Pony? With a hoof. "May I ask for your name?" She finished with a really creepy loving smile.

I was confused as all shit, but the fact that the purple one was called 'Twilight Sparkle' almost had me laughing out loud, oh the irony.. I took a second to compose myself before replying "By the gods, I've gone insane" Big Whitey actually let out a creepily serene laugh upon hearing that, and assured me that this was, in fact real.

"I assure you friend, you are not hallucinating, we are very real. I assume you've never seen creatures such as us before?" I shook my head in a negative "Then I can safely say that you are the first of your kind that we have encountered, also." I nodded dumbly "So, may I ask again for your name?" that same weird, creepy smile.

"Oh, well this is new, I guess... My name's Tom. Full name Thomas, but only my mother calls me that." Pinkie and Twilight seemed to think my name was funny, for some odd reason... And I swear I heard them whispering something about 'meeting Rarity' whoever the fuck he/she was. Celestia simply nodded in understanding, "I'm sorry, but this is really odd to say the least... Are you all in fact unicorns? You're meant to be legends, yet here you are standing before my bed, which can apparently fly now" Where the shit has my bed taken me? "Also, Pinkie Pie?" I asked, turning to the pink one.

"Yes Tom?" she replied, a crazed grin on her face. "What can auntie Pinkie Pie help you with?" 'What the fuck, auntie Pinkie Pie..?'

I replied by gesturing to the floor nearest me "Come here a sec" she then materialized out of thin air right infront of me. "Don't do that..." all I got as a reply was a cute little giggle, so I carried on "right, now I want you to punch me in the arm, right here... Real hard, can you do this for me, Pinkie Pie?" I asked whilst gesturing just below my shoulder.

Pinkie Pie was perplexed as this weird Alien Tom's question "Why would you want me to hit you silly? Only meany mcmeanypantses hurt their friends!" Friend? We've only just met... Urgh, whatever..

"Well, I need to see if I'm dreaming or not, so please hit me.. It'll mean the world to me!!" I asked with a slightly hurt tone, it seemed to work either way..

"Okie dokie loki!" she said before slamming her hoof into my arm so hard I think I dislocated something, I was slightly winded and rather pissed off that she hit me THAT hard "cachu sanctaidd!!! By the gods woman, are you made of titanium or something!? You almost broke my arm!" Pinkie Pie was almost crying at this point

"I...I'm sorry! Please don't be mad Tommy, you told me to hit you so I d...Did!" She started bawling at this point. Wow, I feel sorry for her... I did ask her to, afterall. Great, now I feel like a dick.

"No no, Pinkie... Please, don't cry.. I feel like a prick now, I did ask you to hit me after all.. I'm still your friend!" I grabbed her in a hug 'holy shit, she is soft as hell' it seemed to work, either way. Pinkie suddenly stopped crying completely and went back to her chipper, happy attitude "why do you smell like cotton candy...?" I asked after taking a whiff of her

She giggled, ignoring my question "okie dokie Tommy! I'm glad I could help!" she then returned to the three princesses whilst I nursed my new throbbing shoulder. I tried to gauge their reactions to my friendly conversation with Pinkie. Twilight seemed to be rather apprehensive and disapproving of me, Luna seemed to be rather amused and Celestia wore a warm smile to her features.. And not just that creepy fake serene smile crap, an actual smile. She then resumed where she left off.

"Well then, hello Tom, and welcome to Equestria. It is my understanding that princess Twilight inadvertently teleported you here whilst practicing a new spell." Spell? Equestria? Sure, why the hell not. I just shrugged in response, I then looked to Luna, who seemed to have a neutral expression adorning her features once more, 'weird... I feel, odd when looking at her.' she must have noticed my confused expression, and she tilted her head in equal confusion and slight suspicion. We held our gaze for a few more seconds before I averted my eyes, looking at her made me feel funny... And not the butterflies funny, either.

Shaking the feeling off, I looked back to Celestia "well, it's very nice to meet you, princesses Celestia, Luna, Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie. Can I ask where I am? I caught the Equestria bit, but why am I in the middle of a library and in my bed, I might add?" I'm so confused right now...

Celestia pondered upon this for a moment 'How much can I tell him? Can we truly trust him yet?' "I believe my student and fellow princess, Twilight Sparkle can explain better than I" she motioned towards Twilight, who seemed like she wanted to be anywhere but here right now..

"A...Uhhh...Ahem.. Yes, it's nice to meet you, Tom. You're currently in my library, in the town of Ponyville, which is situated in the country of Equestria, on the planet Equus. Equestria is bordered by Griffonia and Zebafrica, and-" she was cut off by Luna

"That will be enough, Twilight Sparkle. He now has the knowledge he seeks. Now, I have a question for you, sir Tom." I looked to Luna, that same feeling was back...

"Of course, princess" I replied, turning my head to show she had my full attention.

Luna was confused, this strange being named 'Tom' is giving her mixed opinions. First, he just stares at her, seemingly infatuated, the next he's fine. One second he's shouting at the element of laughter, the next he's pouring out his heart trying to make amends for upsetting her. He is truly an odd creature. She was pulled from her musings by the sound of somepony clearing their throats. Looking up, she saw this 'Tom' looking at her expectantly, which a blush she carried on.

"Ahem.. Our apologies, we have several questions, for thou." he hodded in understanding, so she carried on "What manner of creature are thou?" after learning he was something called a human, she moved on to her next enquiry "Thou seemed to be staring rather... intently at us, and thou hast returned thine gaze to us several times now, why is this?" She finished with a slight blush, Luna was honestly confused, not many beings would pay her even a second glance, if her sister were around.

'Bitch stole my question, well... mine was slightly altered, but whatevz...' "Well, I'm not too sure... I feel.. Odd, when I look at you" noticing the blush growing even fiercer on the blue mare's face, as well as seeing her face contort to mild disgust, I soldiered on "Not like that, by the gods... We've only just met! Anyways, it's hard to explain... Your hair, mane?" she nodded "Right, your mane and coat colours remind me of the night sky, I guess.. I've always loved the night; the air is cool, the silence is soothing, I could stare at the stars all night, almost in a trance. That's the feeling I get when looking at you, your very presence seems to sooth me. And when I look into your mane, it feels just like looking at the stars does, If that makes any sense?" Where the fuck did that come from...?

Luna seemed absolutely dumbstruck, I'm guessing she wasn't expecting an answer like that... "Well, we thank you for such kind words, and we are overjoyed to meet a fellow denizen of the night, sir Tom" Nor Celestia, for that matter. She chuckled, and I turned my head to look at her.

"That is understandable, my sister is the princess of the night, after all. She commands the stars and moon, bringing night as I bring the day. Though I'm curious, what do you feel when looking upon me?" she asked, with a cock of her head

I looked to her and locked my eyes with hers. The feeling was, odd. It felt warm, inviting... It made me feel like I wanted to help her.. I didn't like it, at all. I looked away and shook my head, before looking back at her with a slight scowl "You feel commanding, but inviting... Authoritative, but understanding... Warm, and.. Something else...." She seemed happy, but confused at this

"Something else? Pray tell, what is it?" She asked

"I'm not sure, but I don't like it... Not one bit, I feel like I want to go out of my way to actively help you, to please you.. Why?" I asked with slight ire

Celestia smiled, oddly enough 'Okay, that's NOT the reaction I was expecting... "Fear not, my friend. That was merely a test of magical aptitude, to read emotions as you did, it shows a pony's magical ability on a rough scale. That feeling of subservience you felt was part of the test" seeing the anger in my eyes she continued "please, stay you anger. I merely did it to test you, you can rest assured that I will never do that again." I'll have to keep a close eye on this one, maybe go out of my way to be a dick to her... Counteract that weird power "Though I must say, you have a decent level of magic in you. Can you show us?"

I growled, glaring "so you think it's okay to just try and manipulate me? Where the FUCK do you get off?! That's just an invasion of the mind!"

Celestia flinched back as if she was struck, a dumbfounded expression on her face "I-I apologize, I had no idea you would be so opposed to it. I assure you, it has been standard practice in Equestria for many generations, there was no malicious intent"

I held my glare "I'll let it slide, then. But know this, ruler of Equestria. NEVER do that to me again" I then took a complete 180 in emotion, going back to slightly confused " I don't do magic.... Humans can't use magic..." I said with a perplexed expression, Celestia exchanged an apprehensive glance with her sister, who nodded in turn.

"Tom, please accept my apology. You have my word that I shall never cast that spell upon you again. And if you would be so kind, I will cast a spell that will reveal magical abilities to us, should you have any." That would be pretty cool, considering I apparently have magic now, I'd like to see what I can do..

"Sure, I'd love to see what I can do. I've always wanted to cast magic missile!" I announced with glee, the princesses all exchanged worried glances before turning their attention back to me

Celestia then spoke up "very well, you may feel strange, but rest assured that will be normal. I shall erect a shield spell in case of emergency, now let us begin."