Yeah. Yeah, you know, how can you talk about something non-existent?
Nothing is really important about that except that Mareista's trying out some new packaging materials for your record. Hold on. Let me get the door. Oh, and another thing. We cancelled your Oslo gig.
What the hell youze talkin' about?
Let's not worry 'bout that now. That city ain't really all that big enough for you.
HOSPITALITY SUITE
OF MAREISTA RECORDS
So, heard you have a new album.
Yeah. Yeah. Dat's gonna come out, I think it's coming out...
Estimated date is August 1988.
And dat album would be Love, Don't War, if I'm not mistaken.
Very provocative title. I like it.
And if you REALLY like it, you should see the cover art we came up with for it.
Yeah, I might want to talk to you about the cover artwork, uh, for this particular record.
Yes.
We feel, as much as does everyone else here, that the record company REALLY is going against this cover
Ah yes. They don't like the cover and find it very offensive and inappropriate and, um, sexist too.
What do you find offensive about it exactly?
Well, um, the group put in various photos of them having sex set against a backdrop of a war-torn area, and in the middle of it, there are men and women walking with male penises and female vaginas and breasts sticking out. Do you find THAT offensive?! Do you find THAT sexist?!
But this is 1988!
I know that it's 1988! Get out of the '60s! Nobody has that type of mentality anymore!
Go look at the cover that they wanted to do.
Nobody gives a SHIT about what they wanted to do. Go talk to your Five Marks about this cover. I don't think that the whole things I described are answers to why an album either sells or doesn't. Go tell me. What was The White Album? What was The Black Album? Nothing was on the fucking covers of either. 'Scuse me. I have a call to make. I'll talk with you later.
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Hello. Yeah. Yeah, OK, let's have YOU tell them. YOU tell them. OK? It's Large Cigars. He wants to talk to you.
Yeah, hello. Oh, my fucking god! Well, it's not really all that offensive dear. Come on now. OK, I'll phone you absolutely first thing in the morning.
Mareista is not gonna release the album since they decided that the cover is sexist and offensive and inappropriate.
Well, what the hell was wrong about being sexy in the first place?
OK, listen up. For such a long time, I wanted to tell you this, and was holding back 'cause I didn't know what the decision of Large Cigars was gonna be. Yet at this point, both Sears, Kmart, and Asda stores have refused handling of the CD, cassette, and LP. And it's only because of the cover for each version that they're boycotting each version.
And if that company is behind that album, it can shove it right up their fucking ass!
Money talks. Bullshit walks. If Album No. 1 was a fuckin' hit, then we could have pressed on the label. And then we could have told them YES WE CAN!
Look, here, look here missy. If we were serious and we said, "Yes, they should walk around the little area naked," THEN you would have a point. But it's all the biggest joke on earth, isn't it? Yes. We're just satirizing it! Not like we're repeating it on and on and on and on...
The thing is, we could probably work something out. You know. I'll talk to the CEO of the company, and then maybe we can come up with a compromise, and then maybe a brand new design concept we could all live with.