Roses And Thorns

I looked around my entry, the large room still littered in bags and strewn about blankets. Most of my bags were still packed, and only my clothes and a futon were unpacked. Makeup, nicknacks, my writing and drawing equipment was all still packed up along side my special bag. Cork's had joined the pile, sitting open with a stuffed dog sitting half in and half out.

Cork was roaming around my entry, looking around like mad. "...I saw a phone around here...I know I did." He muttered to himself, walking up to me. "There is a phone, like an old phone, pony phone, right?"

I stretched my arms, my joints popping loudly. "Phone...why do you need a phone?"

Cork shook his head sadly. "...I need to call my sister...she might be able to get them to let me back home...."

"Oh...I think it's in the hall with the green flag with the squiggly text." I pointed towards the hall into the main den. "...This place is so huge, I don't even know."

Cork frowned softly. "Well...I'll find it. I don't 'ave much choice." He turned to the hall trotting quickly off.

I couldn't help but stare at his flank. He was strong, still short, but he had a nice look to him. "...Back that ass up...." I mumbled, framing him with my fingers. "...Fucking destroy that ass...." I bit my lip, running my hand over my stomach. "...Easy Em...easy."

I rubbed my wrists and started digging through my clothes and finding a pair of sport shorts and a frilly bra. "...God damn it...." I grumbled, quickly realizing I was out of proper sleeping attire. "Hey Em, let's sleep dressed up like a whore! Good idea, Em, great way to keep from breaking that nerd's heart! ...I need a washing machine...."

I pulled my shirt off, tossing it into a pile and quickly flinging my pants off into it as well. I looked down, my black underwear making my skin blinding in comparison. I felt a bit of shame being able to see my toes, the curse of being not only short but tiny meant I didn't have much up top. Just enough to make me wish I had more and enough to jiggle. I let out an angry huff and undid my near pointless bra, pulling on the oddly comfortable lace one.

I felt a little exposed changing in my entry, but it was late, I had brushed my teeth, I wasn't leaving this room until I had eight hours. I yanked my old panties down and swooped on the shorts, pulling them tight and letting out a tired sigh. My day was finally done, now all that was left was sorting out the bed situation and getting to sleep.

I lumbered over to my bags, my futon laying in the middle. I only had one place to sleep, but I wasn't above sleeping with the harmless nerd or across my bags. Cork had started on a bed frame in the back, but he was working with scrap wood and I wasn't expecting miracles within the few hours he'd finally walked inside.

Either way I needed to sort out my bed. I collected my clothes in a pile and set them near the hallway to the back yard. I had more clothes in a storage unit back home, but I was going to end up wearing bondage gear if I couldn't sort out some way to wash my stuff.

I hurried back to my futon, cleaning off a few crumbs and thinking of what to do. I really didn't feel right leaving the little dork sleeping on my toys or my drawing equipment. I didn't really like the idea of sharing my already cramped bed, but hugging a pony for a night could be worse, and I really couldn't throw him out after he got kicked out because of me.

As I bent over my bed something started tugging on my panties. "...What the fu--" A loud snap and a sharp pinch made me jerk forward, nearly tripping on my bed. "Fuck!" I shot forward, my body jiggling as I bolted away from the sudden snap. I spun around, finding Cork with a bright red band over his muzzle. "Did you just snap my panties!? You little shit!"

Cork shop upright. "I didn't--"

I slapped him across the cheek, making him wobble off to the side. "Asshole!" I whirled around and pulled my pillow up. "Touch my ass!? You have a death wish!?"

"I--" I cut him off, slamming the pillow into the side of his head. "Hey! I- ow, stop it!"

I assailed the short stallion, backing him into the door as I wailed on him with the pillow. "Psycho, nutcase, weirdo!"

"Hey hey hey, stop it!" He yelped, batting at the pillow with his hooves. "Stop!"

"Touch my ass, balls the size of grapefruits but a brain the size of a chickpea!" I screamed, swinging the pillow into the side of his head and causing him to stumble backwards. "You got five seconds to give me a reason not to kick your ass out!"

Cork took a few steps back, shaking his head and tossing his mane about. "Oi, I get it, no touch! I'm sorry, alright!?"

"No, not alright!" I shouted, stomping my foot. "You don't touch people you don't know! I let you inside because you're not a terrible person, and you turn around and snap my shorts!? Do you want to die?!"

Cork backed against my door. "No! I just...I- you were bending over...and you have...I mean, I thought maybe we could--"

"I know what you want! Believe me, you're a little obvious about it!" I threw the pillow at him, storming up to the flustered stallion and glaring at him. "There's a lot of reasons it won't work, but starting by snapping my shorts is a surefire way to get plugged by a twelve gauge!"

Cork reared up, plastering his back against the wall. "I'm sorry alright! I didn't think you'd get so mad about it!"

"You thought I'd like it, just like everyone else I knew!" I shot back, slapping the wall next to his head and spinning around. "You're such a prick...."

Cork shook his head, a chain jingling against his neck. "I'm really sorry alright..you're walking around like that...you invited me over, I made assumptions. Look...if you want to kick me out I won't blame you, I can sleep on a bench until my sister gets here."

I flopped down on my futon, pushing my dyed hair away from my face. "Look...just, don't be an asshole. I--"

"Can I ask...what would you have done?" Cork asked, walking slowly over. "I mean...I heard you when you were talking about me."

"When I joke about you? You thought I was serious about all that?" I asked, my brow flat as could be. "I mean seriously...you're asking me if I'd snap someone's panties...aren't you?"

"Well I said what if I--"

"You wear panties?" I jeered, "That's cute...." I groaned, mocking him and testing his demeanor. "Little frilly kinds?"

Cork took a deep breath, his voice wavering between proper English and pissed off cockney. "Right...I deserved that, but I'm- okay...so, can I ask it?"

I flicked my wrist, holding my hand out dismissively. "Sure...then I'll show you why it wont work, besides you being a xenophobic prick and a pony."

Cork flinched back slightly. "Uh...alright.... Would you...since I got kicked out and all, let me stay here?"

"Oh...not what I thought you were going to ask." I snapped, aw bit of happy surprise in my words. "Sure, but you have to help make this place less shitty. I need furniture, stuff, I mean...if you want to help pay rent this place is big enough that we could both live here and never see each other."

"Right...right, I knew the people who owned this place before that they did the same thing. But...second question...would you...ever, if we got over this little bump in the path, ever see--"

"Holy shit...just ask it." I groaned, throwing my head back and staring at the ceiling. "Grow a pair!"

"Well I don't know how to ask it! I've never done this with a human!" Cork shouted, stomping his hoof and causing his red mane to jostle. "Mares are easy! You just ask, but griffons always expect something, and I don't know toss about what--"

"Ask it!"

"Date!? Hang out!? Shag!?" Corked shouted, jerking forward with each yelp. "That what you wanted?!"

I held my arms out, "Yes! Was it so hard!?" I reached over towards my special bag. "Now let me, in two simple words-" I found one of my old employers crafts, "-ruin any thought you had of being with me." I held the fantasy tongue dildo in my hand, gripping the fake tongue hard and letting the smooth material grace my palm. "Bad, Dragon!" I shouted, slamming the dragon tongue dildo against the floor and leaving it for Cork to see. "This, all this stuff in this bag-" I waved my hand at the special bag, "- leathers, whips, toys, everything in there has ruined any relationship, because they always get scared when I pull them out!"

Cork stared in awe at the molded dragon mouth, tongue jutting through the lips in a lewd fashion. "Uh...I don't...what is that thing?"

I looked at the black monstrosity, "A dildo, a dishwasher safe anal dildo. I have about three of these, color coordinated for where they go, and they're great nice and slathered!" I shouted with a decent amount of ire in my voice. "Grinding my hips, letting two work my insides like I deserve! And then there's the one I use on my partners!" I crossed my arms, looking at my bag. "...I've dated three ponies, ten men, two women, and a griffon, each one pussied out when I tried to get serious." I shook my head, "They say they love me, then when I try to get them into something new they split, too afraid to trust me and let me have some fun!"

Cork swallowed hard, causing a large lump to travel down his throat. "I- ...are you talking about--"

"Sodomizing men, dressing them in drag, putting makeup on them and riding their faces, which might I add I only got to do once!" I pointed back at the bag. "I've had one girl with enough stones to keep up with my kink, and I guarantee you if you ask me out, and we do end up in bed, you're going to run, and I'm never going to forgive you!"

Cork coughed softly. "But...why? I mean, if things don't work out later then, that's later!"

"But I'm warning you now!" I shot back, "I'm warning you now it won't work, and if you get my hopes up and pussy out we're done as friends, as- as- as lovers, as anything! I won't even speak to you again, because I won't have my heart broken again! No more fake promises!" I screamed, tearing up ever so slightly. "No more!"

Cork slowly tapped his hooves against the ground. "Uh...I'm not- are you crying?" He asked, slowly stepping over. "Are you alright?"

I tried to push him away, only batting at the air. "I'm fine! Just...you're a prick."

Cork stood before me, shifting left and right. "Um...so, if I- like...how far do you usually go? Can I like...if I try, can I still say no?"

I took a deep breath, holding my hands out to brace myself on some invisible walls. "Cork, if you made it past the first day, you'd be braver than half the other men I've met, but it won't happen."

Cork took a deep breath, slowly walking up to me and throwing a hoof around my back, pulling me against his torso. "I uh...you're really cute, if you couldn't tell...and maybe I- I mean, what's it like? What would you do to me?"

I pushed him away. "You smell like woodchips...." I scooched back onto my futon, leaving place for the short stallion. "Look, I'll, you- I- it's tight, hot, starts out painful but after a while you get used to it and it's just so nice having something so warm and slippery sliding in and out of your tender little hole, your body trying to make room and- I- ...it's hard to explain without- I mean you especially, you don't have an inny, just a tiny little pecker."

Cork shifted his backside carefully. "Uh...I have to admit, the prospect of having something up my ass isn't exactly pleasent, but maybe I can--"

"Cork, you try to date me, either something is going up your ass at some point, or you're going to get thrown out on your balls." I pushed my foot against his chest, "I'm not one sided, I'd...trust me when I say you'd get yours, but this is what I do, who I am, and if you can't adjust, don't expect me to do the same."

Cork shifted about like mad. "I just- look, I've played dress up as a foal, had a few weird times, but never anything near my asshole. I'm, pretty open minded, but that--"

"Are you willing to let me do whatever I want, so long as I don't stick something up your ass?" I scratched his chest with my orange painted toes, "Damn I'm pale...I should tan...."

Cork looked down at my foot on his chest. "Oi, can I ask, do all humans paint their thingies? I've seen like three, but you're the first one to actually come by. I mean, is it like hoof painting?"

I shrugged, "I don't know what that is, but I'm gonna guess yes." I looked down at his beige hooves, hiding just under his matching fetlocks, "Tell you what, you want a chance?"

Cork nodded softly, "I'd like to...try? I mean, I'd like to try."

"Can I paint your hooves and dress you up?"

Cork looked around nervously. "Is this--"

"Just clothes, nothing around your junk." I stated, continuing to scratch his chest with my toes, "Oh my god this feels good...uh, no, just clothes girls clothes, but nobody but me is gonna see."

Cork stared down at my feet. "I- so if I do that we can date? I can have a shot?"

I looked up at him with a soft frown. "Sure...but that doesn't mean you can just touch me out of nowhere, this is a tentative alliance at best."

Cork lifted his right hoof up, looking around for a bit. "Hardly an alliance...but if you want to dress me in mare's clothes, I'm gonna do this." Cork leaned his head down, pecking the top of my foot.

Things fell to a frigid level as he stepped back, "...Ballsy, stupid, and I should hit you for that...."

"Are you going to?" Cork asked with a nervous smile.

I shrugged. "Kissing my foot after asking to date me is a little different from randomly touching my ass. And you pretty much just sealed your day tomorrow to me." I pulled my foot back, "Ever wear a skirt?"

Cork laughed gently. "Does a kilt count?"

I snickered gently. "A miniskirt is a bit different, but you'll look good. A little lipstick, some nail polish and a bikini and you'll look great."

Cork popped his head back. "Wait...lipstick?"

I nodded. "I'll let you pick the color. Now, two rules before I knock out," I stood up, waving my hand at my breasts. "Don't touch here," I moved my hand to my waist. "Or here. You saw that shotgun I bought, I wake up with you hovering over me I'm going to end you."

Cork coughed roughly as I sat down. "Well you'd probably go to The Rock, I mean who is going to believe that you killed me in self defense?"

I stared at the little pony. "Was that a threat?"

Cork shot bolt stiff. "Wait, wait, wait, no! No!" He shook his head hard, "I'm just- I--"

"You're a dork." I stated coldy.

"I really am.... But I meant, you're in Trottingham...you've seen how we treat foreigners...you'd be sent to a cell even if you did nothing wrong."

I shook my head. "Why? Why so racist?" I asked, laying down and making room for Cork again. "You can lay down if you want, I don't have another bed, just face back to back alright?"

Cork took a deep breath. "I don't know, just, always been ponies, and we're not supposed to allow anypo- any other race. I mean, even pegasus aren't exactly liked around here."

"That's weird dude, that's like, really weird."

Cork walked up onto the futon, laying down with his back pressed against my own. "I know."

I stared up at the lights. "...God damn it...."

"What's wrong?"

I got to my feet, pushing off Cork's wither and walking to the lights. "Why aren't clappers standard!? Bullshit non-wireless functionality." I flipped the lights off, "I wish my phone still worked." I grumbled, flopping down on my beck next to Cork. "I wish I had a lot of stuff."

Cork leaned his head around. "I wish I didn't get kicked out."

"You're the one who came out here on his own. You knew what could happen."

"I know, I'm starting to be glad it happened." He pushed his back against my side, rubbing his soft coat against my skin. "You're really pretty, for a human."

I looked over at him. "Why'd you have to qualify it with, for a human?"

"Uh, because I find ponies...generally more attractive--"

"Cork, shut it, before you end up with a ball gag in your mouth and a ring around your dick." I threw my arm out, stretching my limbs.

"...I like your wiggly things." Cork mumbled, looking up towards the fort of bags that surrounded our heads. "The painted wigglies."

"Toes, and fingers." I clarified.

"Sure."

Things grew a bit quiet, Cork breaking the silence like a bunch of restless kids talking through the night. "Hey, what's a Bad Dragon?"

I chuckled softly. "It's a company I used to work for. I bought a bunch of their stuff before I came over, and I'm still technically promoting them...with an assumed name of course." I shifted against him. "Can't have a children's show creator be affiliated with an adult toy company."

Cork hummed, "Okay...so what do they do?"

I locked up. "They make special dildos. Like, the tongue one you saw, they have dog dildos, dragon dildos, sharks, ponies, aliens, all sorts of stuff." I chuckled gingerly. "They even have these things that go over a dick, and make it all funky, like a sleeve thing that makes it feel different."

Cork leaned his head around, staring at me with a single green eye. "You live in a fascinating world."

"Bitch, they make them here too now! They make them in Canterlot, and most end up going to Manehattan."

"I meant more that, it's something that exists, when here if you wanted to you could just shag a dragon."

I laughed loudly. "Oh, and they- they make these things that are like, like pussy flashlights." I held my stomach as I snickered, "Oh man, I wonder if they did research over here, they totally should!"

"What, like molding-"

"Molding actual dragon dicks and pussy, yes! I mean, they make asshole versions, pussy versions, dildos, why not spend the money to get it right and just rake in the cash!?"

"Because they have really, really sharp teeth...and a lacking sense of humor--"

"Oh my god, and the mouth one! It's so creepy, just a pair of silicon lips in a flashlight!" I shivered and rubbed my back against him. "Butch watching a cock slide through it, watching it up close...it's so--"

Cork slid away from me. "So you're like, a super pervert, aren't you?"

"Oh big time." I pushed closer to him. "Regretting your choice yet?"

"Not gonna lie, a little scared." Cork cornered himself against my bags, trying to escape me. "But...you seem nice, and interesting to say the least."

I nodded, "You take a dildo up the ass for me, you get something amazing. Or, I like to think I'm pretty amazing."

Cork laughed nervously. "Awesome is a better word, amazing is a bit too positive, and it's rather awe inspiring to hear you talk so adamantly for sex toys."

"Oh shut up...." I turned away, keeping him pinned against the side of the futon as I tried to fall asleep.

"What? Are you going to sit here and tell me a cock up a stallion's ass isn't terrifying?"

I locked up. "I- uh...I mean like, I can't imagine it would be too bad."

"The thought is already horrid, I can't imagine the act would be much better."

"Ever ask your girl-mare- person friend for anal?"

Cork didn't answer. "So...goodnight...."

"That's what I thought, nerd."