Spooky Skeletons Raid, and Ultimately Pillage, Ponyville

Princess Celestia hovered above the road outside Canterlot, looking for a suitable ditch in which to pitch this bitch. She placed the bloodied corpse on the ground and surveyed the environment, still no empty ditches in sight. She kept hovering solemnly, until she saw something which confused the Great Industrious leader of the Democrstic Republic of Equestria. Bones lay scattered on the bumpy road, and as Celestia pressed onward, the bones became more prevalent, to the point where they almost covered the road entirely. Whilst bones littering public spaces is not that odd an occurrence in Equestria, what was odd was the prevalence of musical instruments and corpses which had not yet been pitched into a ditch like a bitch. The princess picked up pace, she needed to discover the source of the instruments, she needed to maintain an iron tight grip on the populous of Equestria and it's simply impossible to keep the peons moral down without controlling the fried goods and the musical instruments. Celestia veered around a corner and was shocked by what she saw, a large, derelict building which had ghosts and shit flying around it, looking all scary and stuff, not the sort of scary like 'boo' scary but more like the, 'please don't touch that place Granpappy it hurts' kind of way. Celestia opened the door with her magic and saw a group of skeletons playing strip poker, dropping bones every time they lost a hand.

"This is 2Sp00ky4me." Celestia gasped, with terror and slight arousal.

All of a sudden the undead scourge whipped their heads around and glared at the princess, they had headed her overused meme and were angry due to the interruption of their strip poker game! The bone men charged at the princess and grabbed onto her thighs, biting them not unlike mike Tyson would. Celestia collapsed like an old woman being euthanised and began to kick at the skeletal attackers, blasting magic at any who got within her field of view. The princess wriggled out of their grasp and flew to the ceiling, this allowed her to fire magical pot shots at her assailants like the little bitch that she is, instead of fighting the undead like a MAN. After she had vaporised the entire brigade, she looked around the room for clues, she looked in the skeletons pockets and found a note...

Hey Jim Skeleton, it's me, Larry Skeleton, how goes it? I understand that you're two days away from retirement? that's wonderful to hear! Me and the boys just got summoned by some magic bimbo in Ponyville and we were wondering if you wanted to relish in the carnage?

Write back soon!

Skeleton Larry xoxoxoxox sox