[CR DD&AH] 30Min Writing Challenge #1

One day on the plane of pherexia, there was a artifacter who wanted to make a the perfect robot. But, the Praetor by name of Elesh Norn lived nearby and wanted to stop him because she’s Elesh Nron.

Abnd tgen that artifacter found an assasssian who he thought could kill Elesh Norn, and that assassian was named Leiot. He was a vampire who flew around and sucked the blood of his victims before zombiufing them and using the zimbie Xs to hunt down his enimies. Like the soul sucker from Samuri Jack. He sent the assassian Leiot to kill Eleesh Norn. But she survived, because you can’t just kill eElesh Norn.

So that didn’t woek. SO then the artifacter got reallyt depressed and molloewed in self pitty for a compiously long time. His friend, a Vadalken named Xilem, comforted him .

THEN>>>>> Elesh Norn and her weird pherexian jibblets atatckeded them. The first artifacter who i forgot to say was named phil tried planeswalking alwaty with Zilem, but he failed cause he wasn’t a planeswalker. They did however, leave phexia. They awoke on Ravnica, (Post New-Guildpack), and Xilem hasd been bitten and hads the pherexian virius in him. Phil woke up first and rand away to find some more artifacters. Naturally, he foun d the Izzet league. Zelim awokme next and looked for a cure to docotor to his wounds his pherexian oil. He found a the some Simics and asked them for help, they agrredd to help him by stabilizing his condition. But, he would have to woek for them to do what they needed but didn’t want to do. He agreedm, becasue he didn’t want to die. They built him a lab that he was a part of hin the sewre where he worked with some of the Golgari farmers and some of the Assassians from the Dimmir. Theyn, as his tendrels expanded into the roclk of the undercity, he struck a pipe of mana from the Izzet and  he began to gorge himself, growing stronger and wiser as his body and mind expanmded with the mana in him. then Niz mizzer t noticed that he had a leak and sent Phil down there to fix int.

Upon finding the monstrocity that was Kilem’s new from, he fell to the ground in shiock and began weeping and shitting his pants and peeing  and puking form the smell of his own puiss and shit. Then he became a rocket otf bodily fluidfs, shooting about the pipes and breackng shit. So then he shoot aout of a manhole (HEHE) and slammed into the sun and became the new nsyun of eternal oiss and shit and vomit and tears.

1,000,000,000,000,000….. YEARS LATTER>>>>>>

Then world had became a dark place with the sun being replaced by a fountain of bodily fluids that were gross. The streets were 9 feet deep in shit, tunnels had been carved in the incredabley hard feces, people wore toxic watse suits whenever they went to the outside.

Xilem had kept growing forever because the rest of everyone was disctracted by the shotitiyi volcano on the sun to stop him/her/it/ugh. And then Shrek emerged from tyhe swamp of feces that had become the surface of the world. He banished the shit back into the sun and then threw it into the door of Nothingness so it was gone. fForever. Like myspace and good---- cool commercials. Then he disapeared into the aether, having better things to do.

The world was free of it’s gross coating, but noew it had no sun and would therefore been death ofrever. yeh. I can science. ZBut hen, then best character ever, maeaning most powerful and hottest ever, emerged from the aeverywhere. My OC then banished the foor of nothingness into something mreoe apocalyptic than that, bringing back the sun (For some raeason).

THEN END

fuin

AN: OH GOD./////11111!!!!!!!!! wHAT HAVE I DONE???!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?1

Epilogue:

TA, a time mage reversed everything tso the author feels less worse about himself and theis monstrocity.