Lunalogy

“No...no...nope...nah...not that...not this...nope...nuh uh...negative...where is it?”

Carl popped his head out of the pile of books Stan had thrown at him at said, “What are you looking for, exactly?”

Stan shifted his body and made the ladder roll over to another shelf with more books. “Duh, something that deals with dreams. It can’t be that hard to find.”

“Dreams?” Carl said. “Stan, I don’t think that-”

“Found it!”

Stan and Carl looked down the hall to see Twig carrying a stack of books on his back. “Found what?” Stan asked. “Books on how to be better at cleaning laundry?” He chuckled, hoping others would do the same.

Carl rolled his eyes and Twig set his books down. “No, silly Stan." Twig smiled and stuck his tongue out. "I found books that will keep me up at night.”

Stan decided to ignore this and turned back to book searching. “Keep you up at night?” Carl was starting to question Twig's vocabulary. “Why would you wanna stay up?”

Twig picked up a book and smiled. “So I can stay awake during the night shift. Just look at this one.” Twig ran up to Carl and held the book in his face. “The Back-Breaking-Baker. A story of a fellow pony pastry maker who sides with the Mafia to pound ponies into delicious pastries for bits.”

Carl stuck his tongue out and shook his head. “Gross.”

Twig gave the book to Carl and reached for another one. “And this one. The Garden of Weeds. A story about a mare teacher whose body was fused with a weed, now giving her super weeding strength to teach her class.”

“Super weeding...what?” Carl was having a tough time trying to understand all of these books Twig was showing him.

“And this!” Twig reached for another one and held it high.

“The Haunting on Apple Street?” Carl tilted his head, making sure he read the title right.

Twig dramatically held the book down and stared straight into Carl’s eyes. “The story of three ponies whose souls were taken away by the Burger Slicer, and now they must get their revenge by possessing their relatives body’s, and forcing them to-”

Carl put a hoof in Twig’s mouth. “Twig! What kind of book are you reading, this stuff is really weird.”

Twig spit the hoof out of his mouth and reached for another book. “Not as weird as the Insane Tree Pony From Down the Lane. A story of a mass murdering scientist, and her lizard test subject, who experimented on different emotions to create!” He flipped through the pages of the book until an image popped up. “The Loylauhongenkinmaginarium .”

“T-the what?” Carl looked at the picture and tried to see if such a word even existed.

Twig pulled Carl close to him and held the book in eye level. “The Loylauhongenkinmaginarium! A creature with five different emotions, each one more powerful than the last, and with all of them combined, the creature will help the scientist rule the ninth dimension!”

“Um…” Carl was figuring out what to say in response to all of this. “Shouldn’t the pony start smaller?”

Twig close the book and sighed. “She tried that in the eighth dimension, didn’t work.”

“How do you know that if you didn’t even read the book yet?”

Twig tossed the book in with the others. “Oh, I read all of them, very nice reads Carl, they’ll keep you up at night.”

“How?” Carl asked, now thinking that this was just a waste of time. "And why would you even wan't to read things like that."

“Because they leave really cool images in your mind. Especially this...really...big….ONE!” Twig pulled a heavy book from the pile and slammed it right in front of Carl's hooves.

“Future Deeds?” Carl said.

Twig flipped to the middle of the book. “I only read half of it, but it’s about this pony who found this hideous creature with fully blue eyes, and transparent wings, and holes for hooves, and a body as dark as the night!” Twig shivered while Carl was starting to get a picture of what this creature was.

“Uh...Twig.”

“And as the pony took the poor monster in,” Twig continued. “he realized the monster was the offspring of a great ruler, one who almost destroyed the whole land of Equestria!”

“Twig…”

Twig let go of Carl. “And to make matters worse, the creature betrays her caretaker and vows to continue her true father’s work.”

Carl rubbed his neck. “Twig, we don’t have a Dad, remember how he-”

“What?” Twig looked back and forth from the book to Carl, then laughed. “Oh, silly Carl, the monster isn’t one of us, she’s a Gnilegnahc. A creature who has morphing abilities, and can consume emotions rather than food.”

Carl groaned “Twig, you do realized that Gni-whatever, is spelled backward for Changeling, right?”

“It is?” Twig flipped through the book more until he reached the back. “Hu...guess so, and I thought Pencil Licker was more clever than that.” He scratched his head and looked at Carl. “How’d you figure that out?”

Carl sighed and sat down. His blanket still on his back. “Twig, let me explain something to you...”

While Carl went into a rant, Stan reached into the last book of the shelf and pulled it out. He silently gasped at the sight of it. “No way, a book on...on...The Moon's Guide to Dream walking...Hu?” He said. “Guess it makes sense that it has a moon on the cover, not sure why it has a pony’s face on it though.”

After silently reading for a bit, he smiled and looked at his brothers. “Hey guys! I found it!”

“...and that’s why I hate plagiarism...What’d ya say Stan?” Carl said, now ending his rant.

Carl and Twig turned to their right to see Stan holding a book in with his magic. “I said I finally got it guys, now we can...uh…” Stan scratched his head while his friends walked up to him.

“What’d ya find Stan?” Twig asked. “Is it a book on grimey darks?”

“Grimey da...No Twig. It’s about dreams, specifically...’your’ dreams Carl.”

“R-really?” Carl stood back, not even knowing someone would take time and write a book about situations like this.

“Well, sorta, you see, this book explains a lot about stuff and...stuff...but it kinda has some rules in it.” Stan motioned Twig to come closer. Carl was about to do the same but Stan said, “Ah ah ah, not for the dreamer.” He pulled Twig away while Carl dropped his way.

“Really?” Carl said. “You won’t even tell me how it’ll help me?”

“It’s for your own good Carl.” Stan went into a small huddle with Twig while Carl rolled his eyes and looked away.

“I will never understand Stan,” Carl muttered to himself. “him and his idiotic ways. Why does he always have to act like this, like he’s the guy in charge, I’m just as important, and I’d be hung on a web before I let him try and-”

*WHAM*

Carl fell to the floor as a huge about of pain came to his head. He groaned and tried to stand up, but what he heard next stopped him.

“Did I get it, Stanley?”

“One more time, Twig.”

Carl weakly held his head up, now starting to see stars, and two pairs of blue eyes. “O...One more time what?” was the last thing he said before being knocked out by Twig with a book titled, How to Think Consciously.