As everyone's least favorite guard walked down the hall of the Crystal Palace, he occasionally walked past another fellow guard, simply locking eyes and nodding as he continued on his way to the barracks. He hurried along as fast as he could without running, wanting to get the heavy armor off and relax.

Seriously, who the hell thinks it's fun to walk around in 70-pound armor for 8 hours straight? Flash Sentry thought to himself while walking down the kitchen hallway, getting a whiff of tonight's dinner. It smelled of basic ingredients such as warmed hay and wheat bread. Hay sandwiches again? The Princess really doesn't enjoy the fancy stuff, does she?

After leaving the kitchen hallway and losing the scent of food, he returned back to his previous thoughts and complaining.

Couldn't they just use magic to lighten these things up? How hard could it be for them. If the battle mages can summon goddamn crystal shards from thin air or use healing magic to recover any wounds instantaneously for an amount of time, why not take five minutes to reduce the weight of these damn things? Flash rambled on inside his head, musing the facts to himself.

After a few minutes of walking, he was finally nearing his destination and began contemplating what to do tonight. Watch a movie? No, nothing good to watch. Read a little? Nope, that last book he read about the romance between a fucking batpony, earth pony, and a damn lycan pretty much killed his love of books.

As he continued to list possibilities of tonight, he went around a corner, straight into another fellow guard. Both ponies fell on their ass with a clank of metal on metal and then metal on crystal. The guard looked at Flash Sentry with a face of pure annoyance until he recognized him.

"There you are, sir. I was sent to find you to tell you her highness wanted to speak with you as soon as you could spare the time." The officer spoke, as if he had been rehearsing the words for a while. Flash Sentry was just confused and somewhat stunned.

"Me? Why would the Princess want to see me?" Sentry asked of the guard. The guard simply shook his head.

"She didn't say, sir. I was just told to find you and let you know." With that, the guard sauntered off the way he came, leaving Flash Sentry with more questions than answers. After a brief moment of hesitation, he headed towards the royal throne, wondering just what in the hell she could need him for.

As Flash Sentry entered the room, the sound of the closing doors echoed throughout the room. The noise continued to echo around the room before fading to silence as before.

Princess Mi Amora Cadenza was sitting on her throne, or to be correct, she was lying on her throne with her head perched on her forehooves. She appeared to be napping until she began to rise from her throne and walked down the aisle towards the new arrival.

"Good evening, Princess."

"Good evening, Lt. Sentry," Cadence returned the greeting, "I didn't expect you until the morning, but that's alright. That means I'll actually have a little free time to myself in the morning." She continued with a smile. Sentry just chuckled, knowing personally how good it was to actually be able to sleep in.

"Well, I was told to meet you as soon as possible by your messenger. Why did you request to see me anyway, Princess?" Flash asked.

"Please, call me Cadence, and well, I think it's about time we discuss something that occurred a small time ago." Cadence answered, further confusing the pegasus guard.

"Discuss what, ma'am? Has something happened in the Guard that requires my attention?" Flash asked, hoping to get a more straightforward answer this time. Cadence seemed to pick up on the Flash's confusion and worry, and began to walk to a window to the left, a large window overlooking the magnificent Crystal Empire.

"Don't worry Lieutenant; you aren't in any trouble of any kind. You can relax a little. Would you like a drink?" Cadence offered.

"No ma'am, I'm fine, but back to the subject, why have you requested me?" Flash asked once again, getting slightly annoyed at the constant dodging of the question. Of course, it was all inwardly emotions. If he showed annoyance to a Princess... Well, he could kiss his ass goodbye.

"Do you remember the situation a little over 2 months ago involving Princess Sparkle's crown?" Cadence asked, turning to look at Flash Sentry as she spoke.

"Yes. Princess Sparkle's crown was stolen in the middle of the night by one of Princess Celestia's previous students and taken to another world. Princess Sparkle gave chase the next morning, and after 3 days, she returned with her crown. Correct?" Flash Sentry explained, really hoping he hadn't fucked up the summary somehow.

"Yep. Why I wanted to speak to you is something that occurred here in the castle while she was here that very visit. Something involving you two." Cadence said with a sly smile. Flash instantly blushed.

"Us two?!" Flash replied, not knowing what else to say. Cadence simply laughed.

"Yes, you two. You don't need to hide it; I am the Princess of Love after all. Honestly, I find it adorable. Little Twily found a crush," Cadence said with a smile growing on her face. "In the Guard, no less. What is it about you soldier-types that get us mares so easily anyway? I'm the Princess of Love, and I still haven't figured out why I like a stallion in uniform." Cadence stared into Flash's eyes with a look that he wasn't prepared for, lust if he had ever seen it. Cadence must've noticed the stallion's uncomfortable state, as she quickly looked away with a small blush growing on her face.

"Uh, sorry about that. Uh, well... back to what I was getting at, I saw that "thing" going on between you two and thought it was cute, but didn't say anything, just to let it go its own course. 2 months later, everything's turned back to normal, and you two seemed to have completely forgotten about each other." Cadence continued explaining, returning her view back to the world beyond the window. The sun was setting, and the sun's final rays of light were bouncing off of crystal ponies' homes and giving quite a light show to its audience.

"Prin-Cadence, why exactly are you telling me about this? Is there something you want me to do for Princess Sparkle?" Flash asked.

"Well, as you probably know, a few weeks ago when Tirek returned and Twilight finally opened a magical box she had received on becoming a princess, she received a castle. Her own castle." Cadence elaborated while continuing to stare out at the final glimpses of the sun before the moon would take its place in the sky.

"Of course with a castle now, and now further confirmation as her status as a Princess, she needs guards. Experienced guards that are commanded by her and her alone." Cadence looked at Flash. "See where I'm getting at?"

Flash Sentry didn't hear her last words. He was too far gone in thoughts.

So this it. This is my chance to live in Ponyville. He thought. So many perks to be had as a Princess's private guard, and he had the chance now. Improved salary, travel, promotions, anything. All now possible.

"Lt. Sentry?" He snapped out of it straight into the face of Cadence, now looking somewhat confused. "Are you alright?"

"Uh, yes ma'am. Sorry, just kinda let my mind wander for a second. I guess it's my brain telling me to go to bed. I'm usually relaxing and drifting off about now," Flash explained, not completely lying as he felt his eyelids getting slightly heavy.

"Of course. All I need is an answer, and you could head to your barracks for the night," Cadence said.

"An answer to what?" A suddenly very tired Sentry replied.

"Well, Lt. Flash Sentry, would you like to become one of Princess Sparkle's private guards and be called Capt. Flash Sentry instead?" Flash Sentry grew a large, prideful smile.

"Yes, ma'am," He answered with as much confidence as possible in his sleepy state. Cadence grew a smile of her own and turned to walk towards her original location atop her throne.

"Then your paperwork will be taken care of, and you should get something very soon as confirmation along with instructions, living requirements, salaries, and all that stuff,' Cadence finished, sitting on her haunches and yawning at the end. "If that's all for tonight, I believe I will relax, and you should go ahead and return to the barracks for the night." Flash Sentry nodded.

"Good night, Princess." Sentry said as he opened the door to leave.

"Good night, Lieutenant." Princess Cadence replied as the door banged closed and everything returned to silence as before.

It didn't remain that way long however, as an all-too familiar figure appeared next to her throne with an all-too familiar smile.

"Oh, how fun is this gonna get, my dear? Sending Princess Twilight's little," Discord changed into a little schoolfilly's uniform, "crush straight to her, when you know the truth. Oh Cadence, why didn't you tell me you liked chaos too? I coulda gone out and bought a cake to celebrate." He finished mocking as a cake spontaneously appeared in his hands, presenting it to the pink alicorn. In frosting, It clearly stated "Congratulations, you're a bitch!".

"Shut up, Discord. You know that's not what I mean to do." Cadence retorted, anger quickly rising. She didn't usually get angry, but something about the Spirit if Chaos just naturally made her more agitated than normal.

"Oh, really dear? Then please explain, because I don't get it," Discord replied while drawing out a complex mathematical equation on a large blackboard. He stared at it for a moment, gasped as if he figured it out, and finished the problem accordingly. He turned to look back at Cadence with a happy, slightly cocky grin and received an unamused frown in return. "Fine, be that way." With a snap of his fingers, the blackboard was gone.

"He just needs to be around Twilight again. He'll come around." Cadence said, trying to convince herself as well as the draconequus.

"Really? Well, Miss Love, I think you know as well as I do you can't force love." Discord chuckled, " Well at least not emotional love. Lust is simple, though. Celestia's still butthurt about the cactus 1,200 years ago. 1,200 years ago! I don't know how she's still angry about it. I didn't know it would actually drive her to..."

"Stop!" The alicorn cut him off. "I really don't wanna know." Discord just huffed with a grin.

"Your loss." Suddenly, an alarm clock appeared next to Discord, playing very loudly the MLP Theme. "Oh, would you look at that. I better go, I'm sure dear Fluttershy is looking for me." Discord snapped his fingers, and with a flash he now donned a 3- piece tuxedo with a rose in his front pocket.

"Until next time, Princess," Discord bade farewell as a door appeared next to him. As he opened the door, he stopped halfway through. "Oh, and please keep spreading the love chaos around. It's starting to feel like Hearts and Hooves day around here, and I positively LOVE it." With that, he stepped through the door and closed it with a smack, leaving the Princess of Love once again alone. She got up off her throne and walked to a window adjacent to the one from before, looking towards the direction of Ponyville.

"If Discord knows...," Cadence looked off in the distance. "Then this can't end well."

Two Weeks Later

As the train rumbled down the tracks, Flash Sentry looked beyond the mountains, down towards his destination; a little rural community now infamous throughout Equestria because of one mare. The mare he was supposed to protect.

Not knowing what else to do, he fumbled through his things to find one object in particular. Pulling it out, he examined the picture for the 100th time. It was a picture of the Elements of Harmony, all together in front of Ponyville's Town Square. They were all in their own unique poses, seemingly relative to their personalities.

He, as well as the other guards, had been given the picture to help them identify and remember just who they were protecting. It seemed stupid to Flash Sentry, but he didn't bother complaining. Even though the main target to protect was Princess Sparkle, the other Elements were also to be protected when necessary. They were just as important as the Element of Magic, and were to be taken care of when called upon. They wouldn't hover around them as they would Princess Sparkle, but they would keep an eye out for trouble.

The more he looked at the picture, the more his eyes jumped to one pony in particular, the pony he had ACTUALLY gotten a crush on two months ago. The butterscotch pegasus laying in the center below with her hooves and wings tucked against her body. While her friends around her were laughing and smiling for joy, she seemed content with a closed smile and remaining stationary.

Something about her just got to Flash; she was so adorable the way she acted. When she was at the Crystal Empire, he remembered her being so shy that she wouldn't even answer anyone unless she knew them personally. She was so quiet, so calm.

From what he was informed of, she was the Element of Kindness, which didn't surprise him in the slightest, and she also had a love for animals, something that Flash never really had. He never had any pets growing up, and he never really got involved with other animals at all unless it was for the Guard. They never interested Flash, so he didn't take the time to learn about them.

Well, some things change. he thought as he placed the picture back in his belongings and leaned back in his chair. He wasn't supposed to arrive in Ponyville for another five or so hours, so a good nap was in order. Or at least, that's what Flash thought as he closed his eyes.

You will be mine, Fluttershy.

Author's Note

Written by Shardz solely. (C1, 3-3B)
Edited by Silverlinings.
Suggestions, comments, thoughts, and any grammatical errors down below.
BUM BUM BUUUM! More terrible sex jokes, shameless shipping, and *gasp* a plot of some kind in the next chapter: "F*ckin' Parties and Sex Everywhere, What Did You Expect?"

P.S. For those of you who pay attention to details and break down everything(I do it a lot personally), you probably noticed that this whole scenario makes no sense(as much as it can) due to one thing: This story doesn't involve Alicorn Twilight. Thus no Princess status, no EG, no Flash Sentry. Well... fuck your logic! Twilight will remain a princess and everything else will remain canon to the S4 finale EXCEPT Twilight will remain a unicorn. Oh, and the library's still intact, as made clear before. I'm not a very good interior designer of large castles. Sorry. Maybe later.
Just wanted to get that out of the way.