Pony Fails

Fluttershy stared at Discord's...injury with equal parts flustered embarrassment, deep shock, and severe concern for her chaotic friend. "Wh..what HAPPENED?" she cried in a harsh whisper, covering her face with her hooves.

"Would you mind...helping me out here first?" Discord asked in a strangled voice.

"Umm...oh my goodness..." Fluttershy's face turned red. "I...I wouldn't even know where to begin..."

"Some ice and some salve, possibly?" Discord suggested. "I'd fetch it myself, but I'm in a bit too much—agh!—pain to use my magic..."

"Oh...you poor thing...alright, I'll help right away..."

Several tense, awkward minutes passed as Fluttershy administered first aid to the best of her abilities, trying desperately not to think too hard about what she was administering aid to. Once Discord was tended to and resting comfortably, Fluttershy asked, "So...what...exactly...umm...if you don't mind..."

Discord grimaced. "I had a date with Celestia," he said.

Fluttershy blinked. "Okay...and...?"

"Well, things got...intimate..."

Fluttershy's blush deepened. "Oh my." She frowned. "But I still don't get how—"

"IT'S LIKE I STUCK MY DICK IN THE SUN!!" Discord cried suddenly. "I seriously wasn't prepared for that! How does she not incinerate anything she sits on?!"

Fluttershy blinked repeatedly. "I...don't think I really needed to hear that..." She frowned. "Although that would explain a few things..."

"Such as?"

"Oh! Nothing, nevermind...you just lie there and rest and, umm...let's pretend none of this ever happened, okay?"