Pony Fails

Fittingly, it was Labor Day when a very pregnant Rarity went into labor.

Her parents were out of the country on holiday, so only her closest friends were gathered in the waiting room for the maternity ward. Sweetie Belle had insisted on being in the delivery room with her sister so she wouldn't be alone; Rarity had steadfastly refused to identify the father, and grew irritable whenever anybody asked.

"So I wonder how long this is gonna take," Rainbow Dash said as she played some game on her phone.

"Labor can last upwards of twelve hours," Twilight said, turning a page in the thick book she carried.

"Wonderful," Rainbow muttered.

A piercing shriek tore through the air. Six heads snapped up sharply.

Sweetie Belle came flying down the hall, looking as though she'd seen every demon in Hell all at once plus a few hundred ghosts. Her marshmallow face was greener than her eyes, which were wide and terrified and haunted. Her hair had turned completely white, and she kept screaming over and over again.

"What's wrong?" Sunset Shimmer asked, shooting to her feet. "Is Rarity alright?"

"She...she...she...she..." Sweetie Belle stammered, before crumpling to her knees and screaming again. And again. And again. Three nurses showed up, each looking pale and shaken, and hauled her away. One of them injected Sweetie Belle with something, and her screams trailed off as she collapsed like a sack of potatoes in their arms.

A doctor wearing a surgical mask walked in, his brow pale and clammy. He looked around at the group with frightened eyes. "Umm..."

"Is Rarity alright?" Twilight asked. "Did something happen?"

The doctor's eyes roved over the group of girls. He swallowed nervously. "You...you don't need to see this," he said shakily.

"We're her friends," Rainbow said firmly. "Whatever happened to Rarity, we need to know."

"Is the baby alright?" Fluttershy asked, biting her thumbnail in fear. "Oh dear, something happened to the baby!"

"No, the babies...they're fine. I think. They...they're healthy."

"Babies?" Pinkie gasped. "She had twins?!"

"Qui-quintuplets," the doctor stammered. The girls all gasped sharply, eyes wide. "But...but they're..."

The girls charged down the hall, following the signs that pointed to the nursery. When they arrived, they looked wildly around, but saw only three babies sleeping in cradles placed some distance from each other.

A harassed-looking nurse staggered up to them, looking like she'd just survived a plane crash. She looked at the girls with frightened eyes. "You...you came in with Rarity," she said.

"Where are the babies?" Sunset demanded. "Is Rarity alright?"

"Y-yes, she...she's fine," the nurse said. "She's in the recovery room."

"The babies?" Fluttershy demanded insistently.

The nurse took a step back. "They...they're in the NIC unit," she said. "We...we can't put them in the..." She swallowed. "We're trying to find a spe—a specialist..."

The girls looked at each other worriedly. "The doctor said they were healthy," Twilight said doubtfully. "What's wrong with them?"

The nurse shook her head. "It..."

"Come on!" Rainbow cried, pushing past the nurse and leading the girls down the hall. They found a sign that read "NICU" and pushed through the door, heedless of the protests of two nurses and a doctor. Inside, they saw a swarm of activity centered around a curtained-off area amid the dozen or so empty plexiglass cribs that lined the room. Nodding at one another with determination, they headed for the curtained area.

"Hey, you can't come in—" a doctor began.

"We're Rarity's friends, and we demand to know what's wrong with her babies!" Sunset said firmly. The girls rounded the curtain, and two plexiglass cribs came within view. One contained three of Rarity's babies; the other contained two.

The girls stopped short as they finally understood everything: Rarity's refusal to identify the father, Sweetie Belle's screaming, the odd reactions of the hospital staff.

For what lay squirming and snuffling and whimpering in the cribs were five wrinkly newborn puppies, each with a disturbingly human face.

"Boy, Rarity really screwed the pooch this time," Pinkie said.

Everyone glared at her. "No, really," Twilight said acidly.

"Well, duh!" Pinkie said obliviously. "I mean, there's 'no littering' signs all over the hospital!"