Pony Fails

Ever since she'd randomly grown a dick, Scootaloo's life had changed in ways she never expected.

She'd become strangely popular at school. Miss Cheerilee frequently became distracted during lessons.

Sure, Diamond Tiara had teased her about it, like she teased her about her tiny wings, but without an attentive audience, she more often than not wandered off to pout. Meanwhile, Silver Spoon asked Scootaloo to go behind the schoolhouse with her almost every day.

The strangest part was that it was always unsheathed and fully erect. Her doctor said that should be a huge problem and probably wasn't healthy, but he couldn't find a thing wrong with her other than that she'd randomly grown a massive orange dick that never went limp, so he just advised her to go to the hospital right away if she ever felt pain or developed growths.

For all intents and purposes, Scootaloo had a fifth leg. And like any adventurous young pony would do, she played with it as often as she could.

Not the way Snips and Snails played with theirs. She had more imagination than that.

And so it was that Rainbow Dash was treated to the odd spectacle that would haunt her nightmares for years to come:

Scootaloo jumped her scooter up onto a steep rail and began grinding down; as soon as the scooter hit the rail, Scootaloo lifted all four legs off the board, using only her wang to balance.

Sometimes, there just isn't enough brain bleach...