Pony Fails

Vinyl Scratch idly dusted the counter of Ponyville's only record store as she waited for business to pick up.

The bell over the door jingled. Apple Bloom and Applejack walked in and trotted up to the counter.

"Do you have Violent Diarrhea?" Apple Bloom asked.

"APPLE BLOOM!" Applejack scolded. "That ain't no kinda question t' ask somepony!"

Apple Bloom tilted her head. "Uhh...it's th' name of a rock band, sis," she said.

Vinyl chuckled and levitated a record onto the counter. Beaming, Apple Bloom produced several bits and tossed them down, then tucked the record into her saddlebag. The two sisters left, Applejack making a very confused face.

A little while later, Scootaloo and her mother entered. Scootaloo buzzed up to the counter. "Do you have Sour Teat?" she asked.

"YOUNG LADY!" Scootaloo's mother snapped.

Vinyl made an 'it's all good' motion with her hoof and laid a record on the counter. Scootaloo's mother looked at the cover and blinked. "Ugh. Seriously?"

Scootaloo paid for her record, and they left.

Button Mash and his mother entered a short while later. Button hopped up onto the counter. "Do you have Skunky Twat?" he asked excitedly.

Vinyl tilted her head toward Love Tap, expecting some sort of parental outburst. Love Tap blinked. "What? I love Skunky Twat!"

Vinyl shrugged, produced the requested record, collected her bits, and waved goodbye to the latest customers.

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon entered the store, giggling excitedly to each other. Diamond Tiara approached the counter. "Do you have Justin Bieber?" she asked.

Vinyl frowned and bucked them clear across the street.