Equestria plays video games

        Twilight was excited. Very excited. More excited than when spike got a date with rarity. More than when she had found out she was a princess! (But then again, she was not very excited about being a princess!) Even more than when she got 56 pages of homework. Today she had invented... (pause for effect) computers! One of her inventions had been shipped to her for prototyping. She opened her new creation, and readied herself. A prompt popped up.

"Two networks available" she read off the screen. "Two? Maybe I tapped into tartarus' torture.net? Oh well, let's see here" There were two options on the screen. Universe 1: Equestria was on the left. Universe two: Earth was on the right. Out of curiousity, she opened Universe two. A naked monkey with a mane wearing a dress popped up. Twilight nearly bugged her eyes out of her head. She called Celestia, who had also been given a prototype. Celestia answered with a respectful greeting.

"Make it quick please. now, what is it?" Asked the princess.

"Celestia! I found an alternate world! It has naked dress wearing monkeys!" Twilight yelled back. "Yes Twilight, and I want you to research these monkeys. They call themselves humans, by the way. Bye now, I am playing this thing called a video game. Try it, it is fun!" With that, the princess of the Sun continued playing call of duty: ghosts, while yelling some gibberish about getting owned by the sun.

Twilight was taking the princess' suggestion.. She browsed for games, but they were either too sexy for twilight offensive or cost too much. She searched puzzle games, and then remembered something button mash once said about arcades. She searched arcade games, and got something called arcadetown. Most of the games were, (of course) costly or offensive. What was not costly or offensive was a game called Flappy Bird. But when she looked in adventure by accident, she saw something called submachine. It looked nice, but she did not trust this arcadetown thing. (It had too many disgusting ads) She searched up Submachine, found it was "a challenging escape game" and opened the official site on mautezskutnik.com, hoping for the best. Twilight waited for it to load. Twilight pressed the start button. Twilight proceeded to play the game.

Words flashed on the screen, and a picture of a basement came up. A static covering, like in an arcade game, was on the screen.

The words began to flash on the screen. Twilight read them. "I remember... I remember I had a dream... I remember finishing that game... But I Don't remember waking up from that dream..." Upon which the screen zoomed out. Twilight moved her mouse around the screen. She was in a red brick room,  with dirt everywhere. There was an odd arcade machine called submachine in the center, and a door on the left. Twilight was a bit freaked out by the music, which made her feel like the only pony in the world. Her character  was not visible on the screen. This was good. Twilight did not want to be a naked dress wearing monkey. She took the door all the way to the far left, a nd found a staircase. She went upstairs, grabbed a cog wheel off the floor, and went back to the first room. On the way she noticed a gramaphone. She dismissed it, and moved on. Fifteen minutes of searching later, she figured out the cog wheel went in the gramaphone. Twilight facehoofed. She tried another one, this one with a teleporter. She failed there too. Every submachine was packed with really hard puzzles.

Six hours of raging later!

Spike walked into the house/library, and plopped onto the floor. Rarity had made him act out a story after he lost a bet, and being in a clopfic was tiring. That was when he heard frantic scribbling from above.  He checked if the windows were open, in case of a burglar, and seeing none, called up the staircase.

"Twilight? you there?" He walked upstairs, wondering why the heck Twilight was up so late. For crying out loud, it was 11:00! As he walked into the room, he was struck immediately by twilight's face. It looked kinda like she was pinkie pie, but with more cocaine. (Either that, or the face of someone who just played super meat boy)

"OH HELLLO! SPIKE, WOULD YOU YOU LIKE TO HEELP ME!?" Spike somehow managed to puke and fall unconscious at the same time. "hmm.. OH WELL, BACK TO MY NOTES!" Twilight continued her notes, writing down that access codes 1, 2, 666, 800, 944, and 000 lead somewhere, and that she had divised a system for blind jumping. 5 weeks later, Princess Celestia sent a letter.

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I have not seen any reports, my dear twilight sparkle. This is a problem, as the princesses all need to give a report. ALL. Especially cadence! Bye now, gonna pwn some newbies

Twilight sparkle took no notice of the letter. She had almost finished submachine FLF, (future loop foundation.) when Celestia crashed through the roof, and almost smooshed twilight. "Why are you playing this crap!? We demand to know!" Yelled celestia in her royal voice. But twilight was very absorbed in the game, and took no notice. "THAT IS IT!" Yelled Celestia. "I CHALLENGE YOU TO A WAR OF OUR GAMES!" Twilight looked up.  "I accept." Princess Celestia put on a combat outfit, camo and all. Spike came to, saw Princess Celestia with an assault rifle, and fainted again

Twilight stood in Ponyville, enjoying dj-pon3's cowboy standoff music. Celestia stood in Canterlot, loading her red dot sight assault rifle. The moon rose... Luna gave the signal.... and Celestia charged! Rainbow came from above, dropping weird radios that you see everywhere in submachine. they exploded, and knocked out flash sentry. Celestia yelled something that sounded like it came from street fighter, and shot rainbow out of the sky with a tank. The tank was then blown up by a tampered-with missile launcher. In the midst of the chaos, spike awoke again, in time to see rainbow dash fly past his window with a gunshot wound and a pile of weird radios.

           "I have the craziest dreams" he said to himself. Spike went back to bed.

In ponyville town hall, reality was collapsing as twilight used one of submachines's weird wisdom gems to create a black hole. She knew Celestia could come at any time, so she did the most sensible thing to do now. she got high on coffee beans.

Celestia entered the town hall, where a rather dizzy twilight was tripping out on coffee beans. "LOOK AT ALL THE COLORS!" Celestia was ready to shoot twilight's face in, but before she could, her organs started imploding. "No! What is this maddness!?" She would have had more to say, except she was busy being eaten by a black hole. Then twilight's organs began to implode too, and because she was mixed with the wisdom gem, it caused a singularity.

Both princess were spewed out, and the black hole exploded. It began to rain radio pieces. "Wow, that was pretty intense." said Celestia, watching twilight vomit out her pancreas. "Guess it is not a loser game. Sorry Twilight. Toodles" Celestia warped away to go kill some CoD noobs.

         Twilight continued to vomit her pancreas. The last thing she said before blacking out was: "I don't really wanna play that game anymore..."