Why We Can't Have Nice Things: Chapter 3 Part 2, the Revengening. A presequel.

I opened my eyes, before me a yellow flower smiled menacingly, reaching out my human hand I cradled the small gem boy and told him, one day, he’d be a titan.

“I don’t think hurling him into the air worked.” Spoke shadow Twilight who’d been corrupted by Sombra’s horn “He spews junk like from Dofiction, the Daring Do fanfic club.”

Dash looked about awkwardly before hiding her fanfic behind her “W-what? Why are you monologuing real stuff now?” I remembered her voice, tears in my eyes as she was lowered into the ground. She looked so peaceful.

“We could hit him repeatedly.” Rarity, my dearest mother, offered knowing it was my fe-

“This fic isn’t rated M!” Pinkie told me, though I knew a pony and human relationsh-

“Stop stop stop, you aren’t a human, an alicorn, anyone's brother, sister or husband… I think. Either way, you’re a brown earth pony, you have a… uh, what is that.” She referred to my ever changing cutie mark, a special power of the Marked Children clan that gives me any talent I need to defeat my foes.

“Ah thank it’s a shoe?” Applejack muttered nuzzling my leg, how she came into the real world I would never know but I loved her like a daughter

“Ok, I’m muting him.” Ablaze with fury, Twilight rose into the air, magic swirling around her body as the he-

Twilight sighed in relief that the insane earth pony was no longer speaking, instead his mouth moved wordlessly, arms flailing about, certainly he was saying something stupid, grandiose, and pointless. “So, anybody know what to do with him?” Twilight asked, now calmly trotting about her lab, friends at her side as she examined the strange stallion

“I have a shark.” Fluttershy murmured much to everyone's shock “Oh, uh, too extreme?”

“I’ll say darling, sure he’s off his rocker, but we can’t hurt him. Good gosh, where does this violent streak come from.” Rarity replied astonished, turning to see a small note produced by the brown stallion

“Hmm, it says…” Rarity rolled her eyes, but the curious looks from the others forced her to speak “Ugh, ‘Though I am mute, I hope your hear can here my love-’ oh of all the ‘it was me, my fault FLuttershy had become the monster that killed your parents’ what th- uh ‘And though you’re pregnant with my child, I’m afraid I can’t be there for I fear lord Dominator’ I feel as if that’s a reference to something ‘will have me dead by the morning, unless you and the other Elements channel into my the 7th element’ by the by we don’t have those anymore ‘and reincarnate me to my true form, Celestia’s fath’ ok this is, honestly, stupid.” She crumpled the note up and tossed it

“Wait, maybe this is a clue?” Twilight caught the note to examine it “Maybe in his insanity there’s some kind of code to- where’d he the paper and ink from?” They all turned to see the stallion furiously writing more and more notes. Hovering one over Twilight skimmed it “Celestia’s lover, first some of Sombra, Lauren Faust, simple man with the heart of the cards?”

“Seems like nonsense ta me.” Applejack added as a note was handed to her “Ah think yalls should… have the… abor- y’know what, ah ain’t got time fer this.” She tossed the note aside “Yalls, uh, just make sure he don’t cause no trouble.” She muttered before leaving

Now the stallion was on two hooves, front legs pumped, mouth wide as if, uh, well either gathering power or taking a very intense bathroom break. “Maybe there’s a pattern or algorithm”

“Darling, maybe he just belongs in a looney bin..” Rarity offered, clearly unsure that the pony had any greater thoughts than whatever madness that crawled into his brain.

“Hmm, anyways, we’ll need to find out where he belongs so we can get him ba-”

“He’s gone.” Fluttershy muttered from behind her mane

“I’m sorry?” Twilight and Rarity looked back at the mare

“Yeah, not sure when but he split. Not before drinking a bunch of your, uh, ingredients.” Rainbow Dash pointed out the many empty contained littering the room.

“Hmph-” Twilight muttered, nonchalantly looking back down at the notes

“Er, dear are you ok?” Rarity muttered

Turning back to Rarity with a large, unnatural smile she said all too loudly “No!”

“Hmm, perhaps we should clean this up and go fetch him before we have two mad ponies running about.” Rarity wondered loudly, turning to the others who nodded their agreement “I’ll clean, you three go search for him.”

“No problem!” Dash did as her namesake and was off

“Oh, um, I don’t think-” Fluttershy began as she was dragged off by Pinkie

“This’ll be fun and caraaaaaaaayzee.” The party mare announced as the two were off

Kicking about the bottles on the ground, Rarity stroked her chin in thought “Perhaps the shark was a good idea.”