From: UE:M Financial Aid Office
To: Dust Cloud, SID #206225
Re: Emergency financial aid application

We have received and reviewed your application for hardship financial aid. While we sympathize with you having lost your on-campus job, employment status and/or changes thereof do not qualify students for hardship financial aid or tuition exemption under any of our university guidelines. We regret to conclude that since you began the semester under a tuition payment plan you must fulfill this semester’s payments as per the terms of the original documents.
While we are unable to offer you any assistance or relief of a monetary nature, we wish to help and remain flexible. The best we can do is to write off the original breakdown of payments, so that as long as your account balance is paid in full by the Friday before finals week, we will consider your account as being in good standing and allow you to keep your grades earned for this semester.

At current, your account shows an outstanding balance of 1,206 bits. Please pay this amount before finals week begins if you want your grades to count for this semester, otherwise you will be assigned an “incomplete” mark for all classes and ineligible for any refund of payments made to date.
Apologies for the inconvenience, and best of luck to you in the future.

University of Equestria at Manehattan Financial Aid Office

The rust-colored pegasus laid the paper on the cafeteria table and hung his head in his hooves. Well, there goes my education, he thought to himself. And I thought this semester was going to be awesome...

“Hey, Copper, what’s up?”

A blue-hued unicorn dropped heavily onto the bench across the table and set his tray down. “I haven’t really seen you much since the semester started, how you been?”

Dust Cloud looked up at his friend. “Hey, Breeze. I’m—fine.”

The stallion blinked. “Hmm, not sure I believe you. What’s wrong, Copper? I saw you a week ago and you were on top of the world. Dorm to yourself, nice class load, on-campus job at the Haystack—you’re livin’ the life.”

“Well,” Dust began, “the first week was fine. Then we started training the new guys at the Haystack. One of the other first-years burned the kitchen down.”

A forkful of pasta hung in the air in front of Breeze’s open mouth, frozen. “They did what now?”

“Yeah. While trying to make sweet potatoes fries.”

“I—I didn’t even know that was possible. Aren’t there sprinklers for that?”

“Yeah, but then one of the unicorns freaked out, and tried to help, but he couldn’t focus and ended up just bursting the sprinkler pipes, then one of the new guys’ tail caught fire, and it all just kinda went downhill from there.” Dust sighed. “It was actually kind of amazing to see, but the long and short of it is that I don’t have a job anymore. On top of that,” he paused, waving the piece of paper in front of him, “I just got turned down for fin aid because the semester already started.”

His friend winced. “Ouch.”

“So that’s it then; I’m going to get kicked out of school because I can’t pay my tuition. I saved for months to be able to cover just half of my first semester’s payments! I needed that job more than anything! You know as well as I do that there aren’t any jobs left!” He slammed his head into the table and covered it with both hooves and wings.

“Yeah, they do tend to be taken by the end of the previous semester. What about jobs in the city?”

“There isn’t anything close enough, but I’ve tried them all anyway,” Dust wined, muffled under his feathers. “The new semester crowd swallowed up everything. Welcome to life in a college town.”

Breeze chewed, lost in thought. “Off-campus housing? Maybe you could find a cheaper living arrangement?”

“I’m a first-year, Breeze. I can’t live off campus.”

“Oh, right.” The unicorn waited while Dust finally came out from under his appendages and sulked in the open. “They really can’t give you anything? You’re, like, the smartest pony I know, Copper! You got straight A’s last semester!”

Dust huffed. “Apparently, due to a lot of bureaucratic stuff that I don't understand, I don’t qualify for academic scholarship until after my first year.”

“Damn...”

The two sat quietly among the hubbub of the dining hall for a moment until Breeze poked his friend with a hoof.

“Hey, have you eaten anything?”

“Not really.”

“You should. Go eat something.”

“Thanks, mom, but I’m good.”

Breeze chuckled. “I think what you need is a night to unwind, Copper. It’s the weekend, my roomie and I have booze, and you need to laugh for a while, but I’d rather you didn’t do it all on an empty stomach. Carpets are hard to clean, dude.”

Dust let out a weak laugh. “Alright, alright. I can’t turn down an invitation from somepony who’s buying, after all.”

“Duuuuude, that suuuuuuuuuucks.”

Fall Breeze smacked his roommate playfully on the head. “Yeah, that’s what I said, idiot.”

Dust Cloud smirked at the pair. The pegasus had bumped into Breeze between classes his first week on campus, and the two had hit it off quickly. Breeze’s roommate, Saxus, the slate-furred earth pony who everyone called “Shadow”, owing to his color, had equally formed a bond with him, and the three were almost always together.

The dark-furred pony rubbed his head and giggled. “Man, I’d hate it if I couldn’t take my classes.”

“Shadow,” Dust mocked, reaching towards the rapidly-emptying bottle of vodka, “you’re a geology major. You study rocks. And dirt. There’s no way it’s that interesting.”

“Mostly rocks. And guess what?” He jumped—unsteadily—to his hooves and shoved his rump right in Dust’s face, displaying his geode cutie mark. “Look, Copper! A rock! ‘Sides, ‘s’not boring at all. Much better than some—some swirly cloud or whatever you have on your butt.”

Dust almost fell over backwards as his personal space was invaded by flank. “Ack, dude, no! I’ll catch boring or something! And it’s a freaking dust devil! You know that.”

The three fell out laughing until Breeze picked up the bottle. “Aww, we’re almost empty. Do we have more?”

Saxus blinked and dropped back into his chair. “Um... No idea, actually. Was that number two, or three?”

Dust blinked as well. “Wasn’t it number one?”

“Dammit,” Breeze muttered, “I hate it when I lose count.”

“Well, I’m not buy—buying another one,” Dust said.

“Hey, you owe us, colt.”

“He owes the school, too, Shadow.”

The earth pony put a hoof to his chin on the second attempt and thought. “Hey, yeah, he does. Well, how’s he gonna pay us both back? All back?” He shook his head and snorted. “Is a school an ‘it’ or a ‘them’”?

Dust sighed drunkenly. “Doesn’t really matter. It’s still to-too many either way. I got nothin’.”

“He could sell bracelets and stuff with the tree-huggers,” Breeze suggested.

“No good with my hooves,” Dust wing-shrugged. “I can barely put on my formal wear for photo day.”

“Busking downtown?” Saxus suggested.

“I’m not musi—can’t play instruments.”

“Hey, what if he got a job at the Haystack?”

Breeze threw a pillow nowhere near Saxus’ head. “That’s what he used to do, moron!”

Saxus ducked and stuck his tongue out at his roommate. “Missed, idiot!”

“Jackass!”

“Prick!”

“Shut up,” Breeze gasped, doubled over with silent laughter, “or I’ll shove my hoof up your ass and make a Shadow puppet!”

All three began laughing out loud. “Nah,” Dust said, “he’d probably like that too much.”

“He’d probably try to charge me for it, too, the cheapskate,” Breeze taunted.

Silence descended on the room as the trio regained control of themselves and the laughter trailed off.

“... Maybe he could do that?” Saxus quietly suggested.

Dust and Breeze looked at each other, confused. “What,” Breeze questioned, “charge other ponies to let them molest you?”

“Not me, dude,” Saxus shook his head, “him. He could charge for... you know. ‘Services.’”

“What, seriously?”

“Look at him, man, he’s kinda cute. I b—bet he could make some bits off of that.”

“I dunno...”

“Pffft. As drunk as I am right now, I’d totally hit that.”

Dust choked on the remains of his drink, sputtering and coughing into his glass. “Guys, come on, do I get a vote before you sell me on the street?”

Saxus leaned back in his chair. “Not a street, dude, the dorm. My older brother knew this place wher—where this mare, right? So, every semester around, like, finals and stuff, she invites stallions with money to her room. Apparently she made quite a stack of bits.”

Breeze hmmmmed to himself, nodding.

“Shadow, dude, come on. I’m not into stallions.”

The earth pony knickered. “Ha! Not stallions, mares! They get so stressed out over midterms and crap like that. I swear, the education and nursing buildings are just a sea of hormones and coffee by the end of the year. Just put out the word, and see if you get any hits.”

“Pun intended?” Breeze chimed in.

“Oh, heh. I guess not,” Saxus realized.

Dust curled up slightly, hugging his hooves and wings around his body. “I don’t know, guys...”

Breeze hopped up, tottered to his left, and regained his balance. “So, like, how does he get the word out? Won’t, like, the school hate that or something?”

“Probably. I don’t know, I’m not a school.” Saxus tapped a hoof against the side of his head as he thought. “What if he didn’t say what was going on? He could just, like, leave a card or something.”

Breeze rummaged through his desk drawers until he came up with an index card and a pen.

“Nah, dude, smaller. It’s gotta fit in with stuff like his student ID and all that.”

Breeze tore the card in half. “Okay, so what should it say?”

“I’m going to jail...” Dust moaned quietly.

“Copper, that’ll never work as a slogan. Hush and let the big ponies talk,” Breeze said, chuckling to himself. Dust simply covered his head with his wings and curled up into a miserable ball on Breeze’s bed.

Saxus stood and paced in an unsteady circle behind his chair. “Like, maybe it should just give a hint. Something like ‘need a break?’”

Breeze hmmmed. How about, “stressed? lonely?’”

“Ooh, ‘need a release?’” Saxus chimed in.

“Nice, Shadow, niiiice...” Breeze said, scrawling a few words slowly across the top of the card. “Okay, so how does it work? Like, do they send something to his campus post office box or something?”

“You crazy? You can’t put his CM number on there, that’s how they’d catch him! His name is on that!” Saxus thought for a moment. Suddenly, his face perked up, he threw a hoof in the air, and promptly crashed to the ground behind his desk. “Just put his room number on it!” he called from the floor.

“How is that any better at all?” Dust mumbled, but Breeze was already putting the info on the card.

“Oh, wait!” Breeze suddenly said, grabbing the pen again and writing “Bring Cash” in block capitals on the bottom of the card. “There, we’re done, I think! You’re all set, Copper, you just might need to pi—pick up a few things. At the store. You know...” he said, winking at Dust.

“I’m going to be sick,” Dust responded.

When Dust awoke for the third time the following morning, his headache had finally subsided to the point where he could distinguish shapes and colors from each other. He lifted his head slowly from the pillow to see that he was indeed back in his own dorm room.

“Thank Harmony I don’t have a roommate this semester...” he muttered to himself. The indignity of last night might have been too much to bear if somepony else had seen him assisted back into his room. Besides, it meant that he was able to fit in a queen-size bed that was infinitely more comfortable than the provided dorm beds, which were more akin to hammocks with springs instead of rope.

He slumped back down, cursing the daylight that snuck through the blinds, and finally noticed the small, rectangular-ish card tucked in under his hoof.

It was a mess. Breeze’s writing, even without needing to use his hooves or mouth, was pretty sloppy at the best of times, much less when he was drunk. The scrawls were awful, but legible:

Stressed? Lonely? Need a release?

Whitefeather Hall 219

BRING CASH

Dust sighed. Apparently last night DID actually happen... His friends had actually not only suggested that he sell his body for bits, they had created a card supposedly to help him get business. He tucked the card into the crook of his wing and staggered over to his desk chair to think more properly. He laid the card on the desk and tried to think, wishing he had a cup of coffee or something to take his mind off of... his mind.

No job, no income, savings already mostly empty... What can I do? Would it really be the worst thing in the world if I had to skip a semester and try again? Would I—COULD I actually do something like this for money? Is there even a chance of making enough?

Dust glanced down at himself ruefully, taking particular note of his extremely unkempt state and smell. His body was covered in rust-colored fur, which was ruffled awkwardly in every direction at once. The ruddy vortex of his cutie mark was apparently covered in something, making his fur sticky and brown. His breath still reeked of vomit and cheap liquor. I’m really not so sure I could make anything, he thought. I’m too small to be athletic, too nerdy to be cool, and too awkward to be desirable. Still, Shadow DID say he thought I was cute...

He shook his head to clear away the thoughts, immediately regretting the act as he clutched his spinning head in his hooves. Shadow’s weird, he decided. He doesn’t actually think I’m cute. I think. Hopefully. Plus, he was REALLY drunk at the time.

He snorted and pulled out a new, crisp card and wrote across it more neatly than Breeze’s attempt, staring blankly at the clean, hoof-lettered business card. What am I doing... This will never work. Besides, I’ve never even had sex before, I can’t sell myself just like that! He snatched up both cards and was on the verge of ripping them in half, but stopped. He froze, trying to figure out why he didn’t seem to want to tear the cards up, which would clearly be the smart and sensible thing to do. Instead, he sighed, stuffed the neat card in with his ID in his saddlebag and settled the whole thing over his shoulders, ready to head to the cafeteria in search of something to break his hangover.

Well, I suppose I have until the end of the semester to try to find some cash. Surely something will open up. I’m sure the Haystack will be back up and running in no time.

There was a sign across the smoke-darkened doorway, halfway across the cafeteria. It hung just below the large board advertising it as The Haystack.

Closed due to fire damage. Reopening fall semester of next year.

Have a great year and come see us again!

Dust sighed, feeling his heart fall right out through his hooves, taking his hopes of graduation with it. Without even thinking about it, he walked slowly back out the door, slowing only long enough to drop a small, white card on a cafeteria table, unnoticed by anypony.

I realize that I need math to be an architect, but they could at least try to make it not completely and utterly boring.

Dust sighed and pushed the notebook away, the page already full of problems he burned through over the course of the evening. Harmony, I hope this is worth it. I’ve already invested three weeks in this freaking calculus book. If it’s wasted because I can’t take my finals, I’m gonna kill myself. He rubbed his eyes as a quiet, almost hesitant knock sounded at the door.

Who would bother knocking at... whatever hour this is? He glanced up at the clock. It’s already 11:30. It’s officially too late for most visitors.

Dust stood and trotted over to the door, opened it, and froze.

Outside was a pony holding a disturbingly familiar white card with his hoofwriting on it.

“Um, hi. I had this card, and I just—well, this is the place, right? I hope it isn’t too late at night. I mean, I figured you wouldn’t want anypony coming by early in the evening, but I wasn’t sure...”

Dust stared over the top of the card into the pony’s earnest eyes, set in a distinctly male face.

Author's Note

No clop in this one, but you know how it is. Gotta develop those characters, first, amirite?
I promise, next chapter will be good and smutty.