Cover Image

The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (A Death Battle Parody)

by TundraStanza
Think about it like Death Battle, only with less death and more hyperactive dialogue. It all started with a fateful encounter between Deadpool and Pinkie Pie. It turned into something bigger.

Every once in a while there is one character that defies all explanation and baffles the minds of geniuses the world over. Today, two such characters will be thrown into the field and all will find out who will win.

---

And remember... this is what I came up with without the hidden stash. Just goes to show you that you don't need to be high to produce something regrettable.
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic belongs to Hasbro Studio.
Death Battle belongs to Screw Attack.
Other properties belong to their respective owners.
Rated Teen for mentions of weapons and use of the word h-e-double-hockey-stick.

Edit:
February 6, 2013: Remember back in last April when I thought this was going to be a one-shot?
Neither do I.

July 16, 2013: I hope I haven't made a terrible mistake by allowing fan fic suggestions for combatants. It'll take me forever to read through all of those works for potential abilities used. In other words, updating will happen at a pace that makes a snail appear to be performing a Sonic Rainboom. Oh well. It is what it is.

March 24, 2015: Spoilers are imminent when diving into this at any given point.

June 9, 2015: I may not respond to every comment, but I will read them. The same applies to any suggestions made in comments or PMs.
-Corollary (October 11, 2015): Multiple comments from the exact same user saying the exact same match up will not make the suggested battle happen any sooner. In fact, it may just deter me from even considering writing it at all. Please do not spam the comment section. Thank you.

Teen
Complete
Random
Crossover
Gore
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Alternate Universe
 
ONP

414637 words: Estimated 1 day to read
Download:textHTMLePUB

184 Chapters:

  1. Red vs. Pink? 2012-04-18 20:39:13 UTC
    1364
  2. Moon, Shine Down! 2012-04-20 07:58:41 UTC
    1457
  3. Chaos Theory 2012-04-20 20:34:01 UTC
    1979
  4. Eyes vs. Stomach 2012-04-21 02:31:52 UTC
    1542
  5. The Race of Champions 2012-04-21 15:03:14 UTC
    1597
  6. Talk the Talk...(AKA the mistake chapter) 2012-04-23 06:14:17 UTC
    1465
  7. Great Minds Think Alike 2012-04-22 01:56:15 UTC
    1529
  8. Change of Face 2012-04-22 23:33:20 UTC
    1382
  9. The Terror of Trios 2012-04-24 00:44:52 UTC
    1839
  10. Diamonds and Roses...(May not contain an actual battle) 2012-04-25 04:03:40 UTC
    1539
  11. Alpha vs. Gamma 2012-04-25 21:23:18 UTC
    1607
  12. I don't think this is a good idea...(this chapter may get deleted in the future) 2012-04-26 01:21:06 UTC
    791
  13. Strength and Discipline 2012-04-27 20:16:16 UTC
    1764
  14. Magic Must Defeat Magic 2012-04-28 20:18:41 UTC
    1601
  15. You're Dead, Miner! 2012-04-29 05:55:40 UTC
    1372
  16. Ego vs. Electro 2012-04-29 16:58:48 UTC
    1189
  17. Dark Battle Royale 2012-05-04 05:19:47 UTC
    1694
  18. Chapter 18: Outtakes and Shenanigans 2012-05-03 03:27:40 UTC
    1446
  19. Bros. vs. Bros. 2012-05-06 03:52:31 UTC
    1628
  20. Knight vs. Castle (AKA Mistake Chapter 2) 2012-12-11 22:51:33 UTC
    1206
  21. Power and Greed 2012-05-08 00:02:03 UTC
    1750
  22. Crazy and Crazier 2012-05-09 08:49:50 UTC
    2090
  23. Chapter 23: Rejected Ideas or Questionable Thoughts (You can probably skip this. I change my mind often.) 2012-05-11 21:01:52 UTC
    1497
  24. Time is of the Essence 2012-05-11 20:13:06 UTC
    1462
  25. Love is a Battlefield 2012-08-22 00:59:12 UTC
    1318
  26. Myde or Muffin? 2012-05-12 22:53:31 UTC
    1469
  27. Case: Tundra vs. Flames 2012-05-18 02:45:54 UTC
    2222
  28. Dilan vs. a Junior Speedster 2012-05-19 02:51:36 UTC
    1699
  29. Bats! Bats On My Face! 2012-05-19 06:25:25 UTC
    1669
  30. The Strong, Silent Type 2012-05-19 19:06:18 UTC
    1464
  31. Chapter 31: Outtake #18 2012-05-24 03:40:46 UTC
    1712
  32. Let's start with a BANG 2012-11-11 03:46:46 UTC
    2089
  33. This is MY book and I'm going to read it! 2012-11-20 22:00:12 UTC
    2179
  34. Never Ending Entropy 2012-11-29 05:01:12 UTC
    1918
  35. Hey, If They Can Make Musical Teens Fight... 2012-12-05 20:26:31 UTC
    2023
  36. Are Yu Ready For This? 2012-12-10 07:09:18 UTC
    2605
  37. Chapter 37: Outtakes Reel #2 2012-12-19 07:53:29 UTC
    1671
  38. You Can't Spell Parody Without "P" 2013-01-15 07:48:12 UTC
    1798
  39. Double Dragon 2013-01-26 20:16:13 UTC
    2155
  40. Fame vs. Inspiration 2013-03-23 18:40:42 UTC
    1889
  41. I'm Walking On Sunshine 2013-05-14 21:22:33 UTC
    1862
  42. Side Chapter: The Sweetest One Of All 2013-05-20 06:07:19 UTC
    1814
  43. Mechanical Integrity 2013-06-03 15:38:32 UTC
    1963
  44. A Dream vs. A Wish 2013-06-29 13:36:53 UTC
    1739
  45. Side Chapter: Darkness of Justice 2013-06-30 23:28:32 UTC
    3535
  46. Side Battle: Twilight Sparkle's Rivals and Their Bling 2013-07-31 01:14:52 UTC
    1975
  47. Side Battle: Strangers, Curtains, and Courage 2013-08-19 22:03:11 UTC
    2279
  48. Kazeshini 2013-09-02 19:35:11 UTC
    1464
  49. Gamma vs. Omega 2013-09-18 06:41:32 UTC
    2276
  50. Side Battle: Treble With A Capital Mr. T 2013-09-26 17:12:03 UTC
    2010
  51. Fear Leads to Suffering 2013-10-03 01:30:34 UTC
    1536
  52. She-Witch 2013-11-17 22:43:18 UTC
    1824
  53. Chapter 53: Season 2 Outtakes Reel #1 2013-11-19 18:54:16 UTC
    1269
  54. Power vs. Power (part 1): Green IS Your Color 2014-01-22 04:52:54 UTC
    1974
  55. Power vs. Power (part 2): Charismatic Party Lovers 2014-03-25 20:14:54 UTC
    1595
  56. Power vs. Power (part 3): When Nerds Collide 2014-03-31 14:55:18 UTC
    1789
  57. Power vs. Power (part 4): Tell Me I'm Pretty 2014-04-05 23:32:56 UTC
    1553
  58. Power vs. Power (part 5): Acrobatic Weather 2014-04-11 22:59:00 UTC
    1889
  59. Power vs. Power (part 6): Red Leader 2014-04-13 01:45:44 UTC
    2944
  60. Kneel, Mare in the Moon 2014-04-26 23:38:28 UTC
    2355
  61. Ultimate Princess Defense: Prince of the Saiyans, Substitute Shinigami, and Eye of Agamatto 2014-05-24 23:54:26 UTC
    6303
  62. Princess vs. Princess: Fire and Lightning 2014-06-25 04:51:12 UTC
    3012
  63. Ch. 63: Side... Battle of the Sexes 2014-07-01 00:33:19 UTC
    1602
  64. Equus Meets West 2014-07-24 17:38:32 UTC
    1813
  65. Amaterasu and Tsukoyomi Weep When Their Daughters Fight 2014-07-28 03:06:57 UTC
    2488
  66. Street Fighter vs. Rock Farmer 2014-07-29 14:26:08 UTC
    1784
  67. New Wings Equals Rematch 2014-08-19 18:02:23 UTC
    1703
  68. Chapter 68: Season 2 Outtakes Reel #2 2014-08-19 20:24:13 UTC
    1594
  69. Chapter 69: Deleted Side Battle Scene, The Most Messed Up Child (very dark. Do not read if you are impressionable, pregnant, or may become pregnant.) 2014-08-23 18:34:47 UTC
    950
  70. Season Three Opens With a Snap 2014-09-01 07:30:35 UTC
    1965
  71. Side Battle: Can You Race With All The Yellow Of The Wind 2014-09-03 22:59:05 UTC
    1499
  72. Shield & Sword 2014-09-14 03:54:53 UTC
    2325
  73. Dare to be Stupid 2014-09-27 18:11:25 UTC
    1498
  74. Another Mouse Bites the Dust 2014-09-28 16:03:32 UTC
    1716
  75. Side Battle: Prince of Blue Heir 2014-09-30 17:54:18 UTC
    1960
  76. In the Heart or in the Head? 2014-10-03 18:03:59 UTC
    1577
  77. Side Battle: Sound the Siren 2014-10-04 07:14:37 UTC
    1951
  78. Hold Onto Your Hats 2014-10-06 18:10:06 UTC
    2088
  79. Side Battle: Six Paths to Death (part 1) 2014-10-07 15:18:22 UTC
    1722
  80. Side Battle: Six Paths to Death (part 2) 2014-10-10 01:09:43 UTC
    1989
  81. Side Battle: Six Paths to Death (part 3) 2014-10-12 00:24:52 UTC
    2498
  82. Side Battle: Six Paths to Death (part 4) 2014-10-17 20:15:24 UTC
    1981
  83. Side Battle: Six Paths to Death (part 5) (Warning: Will contain blood) 2014-10-20 03:31:25 UTC
    2745
  84. Side Battle: Six Paths to Death (part 6): Boss! 2014-11-02 02:34:48 UTC
    2636
  85. Quit Irken My Hair 2014-11-04 17:00:55 UTC
    2221
  86. Centaurion Pig-Fight 2014-11-07 18:43:27 UTC
    2328
  87. Side Battle: Augmentation vs. Flatulation 2014-11-15 17:31:27 UTC
    2620
  88. Chapter 88: Five Nights to Fail 2014-11-22 08:09:35 UTC
    954
  89. Bulging Biceps 2014-11-27 18:59:03 UTC
    1490
  90. Queen of the Hive 2014-11-30 16:48:44 UTC
    1913
  91. Bashful Pegasus Knight 2014-12-06 16:17:22 UTC
    1661
  92. Ch. 92: Season 3 Outtakes Reel #1 2014-12-13 05:24:41 UTC
    1761
  93. Side Battle: Artificial Intelligence vs. Alien Interface 2014-12-14 16:45:18 UTC
    2726
  94. Orange Player Two 2014-12-17 21:49:04 UTC
    2509
  95. "This Place Shall Become Your Grave!" 2014-12-25 21:15:53 UTC
    1964
  96. Side Battle: A Spark vs. Many 2014-12-29 04:06:22 UTC
    1874
  97. Likeable Prince vs. Nostalgia's Green Tunic 2015-01-10 18:30:27 UTC
    1927
  98. D is For... 2015-01-07 21:04:31 UTC
    3254
  99. Ch. 99: No Rhyme or Reason, Just Gotta Fight 2015-01-15 17:45:46 UTC
    1762
  100. Anthropomorphic Battle of the Bands 2015-01-29 21:13:57 UTC
    2535
  101. More Than Meets the Nightmare's Eye 2015-02-08 16:52:56 UTC
    1719
  102. Ch. 102: Fandom's Internal Conflict 2015-02-19 00:38:15 UTC
    1952
  103. Lavender Syndrome vs. The Awakening 2015-02-28 18:42:25 UTC
    1905
  104. Divine Intervention 2015-03-13 15:07:59 UTC
    1987
  105. Chaos Theory: Revisited 2015-03-06 17:22:16 UTC
    2489
  106. Ch. 106: Moon Knight 2015-03-16 21:00:37 UTC
    2032
  107. Ch. 107: Capes and Dollhouses 2015-03-24 22:26:58 UTC
    1785
  108. Side Battle: Who Sings Better? 2015-03-29 00:02:44 UTC
    1858
  109. Side Battle: The Ones That Fell From Grace 2015-04-02 19:40:18 UTC
    2935
  110. Ch. 110: Royal Royale 2015-04-07 22:58:21 UTC
    4116
  111. Ch. 111: Littlepip vs. Blackjack (Alternate Ending) 2015-05-01 15:56:04 UTC
    1864
  112. Ch. 112: Up For Review 2015-05-30 18:07:36 UTC
    2574
  113. Kick 'Em in the Side 2015-06-05 07:18:20 UTC
    2611
  114. Ch. 114: Season 3 Outtakes Reel #2 2015-06-10 17:15:20 UTC
    1773
  115. Psychic Sewing 2015-07-01 02:09:19 UTC
    2534
  116. Lightning Round: For Your Viewing (Dis)Pleasure 2015-07-04 05:57:21 UTC
    2107
  117. A Lord for a Lord 2015-07-07 06:02:03 UTC
    2484
  118. Love is a Battlefield (Round 2) 2015-07-10 14:33:22 UTC
    1637
  119. Side Battle: Speedy Cyborgs 2015-07-15 16:24:19 UTC
    2132
  120. Red, Muscular Guys 2015-07-18 23:37:57 UTC
    2135
  121. Science and Magic 2015-07-22 23:40:18 UTC
    2143
  122. The Heroes Behind the Masks 2015-08-05 19:15:47 UTC
    2092
  123. Kakarot-to! 2015-08-01 18:45:33 UTC
    3860
  124. The Ultimate Defense 2015-08-08 23:41:30 UTC
    1865
  125. Blasting Fodder 2015-08-13 21:30:06 UTC
    2454
  126. Lightning Round: Dream Matchups and Nightmare Killers 2015-08-18 19:20:06 UTC
    2500
  127. Foresight, Foreground 2015-08-22 21:38:44 UTC
    3019
  128. Lightning Round: Everything Wrong With "Get Over Here!" 2015-09-19 02:20:30 UTC
    1123
  129. Side Battle: White Snow and a Reflection 2015-10-25 22:17:12 UTC
    3111
  130. You Shall Be Equalized 2015-12-03 21:27:05 UTC
    3117
  131. Lightning Round: Gods of Other Gods 2015-12-24 00:23:40 UTC
    1178
  132. Lighting Round: Going Out on a High Note 2016-01-01 00:04:25 UTC
    1113
  133. Great and Powerful Blue Attack! 2016-03-07 19:57:08 UTC
    3002
  134. Emerald? What Were You Thinking? 2016-04-02 07:25:18 UTC
    2903
  135. Pink! Yellow! 2016-04-11 01:34:44 UTC
    2553
  136. Za Maud-O 2016-04-29 23:56:02 UTC
    2848
  137. That's Show Business 2016-05-09 04:14:47 UTC
    2426
  138. Lightning Round: Shroud of Shadows 2016-05-24 20:03:53 UTC
    3466
  139. Revenge Time is Over; What's Next? 2016-06-05 01:11:54 UTC
    3449
  140. Eagle Scope 2016-06-18 20:48:47 UTC
    3156
  141. Non-Battle Chapter: Meanwhile, in the Potential Combatants' Hangout Room... 2016-06-29 21:04:57 UTC
    901
  142. Side Battle: The Guiding Forces of the Story 2016-07-11 22:09:15 UTC
    2587
  143. Dragon v. Daxter; Magic v. Jak 2016-07-20 02:01:27 UTC
    3417
  144. One Second to Spare 2016-09-15 00:04:06 UTC
    2192
  145. Side Battle: Too Many Powers 2016-10-08 18:08:54 UTC
    3519
  146. Parent-Princess Conference 2016-10-23 08:09:28 UTC
    2311
  147. Farm-Raised Brawlers 2017-01-01 03:48:22 UTC
    2923
  148. Lightning Round: ~We Are Number One~ *Punch!* 2017-01-07 17:10:10 UTC
    842
  149. Introverted Gray Waves 2017-02-18 19:58:58 UTC
    2992
  150. RDP Presents... Side Battle: The Bird Flew Away 2017-03-04 07:47:26 UTC
    3007
  151. Daring Do and the Uncharted Garden 2017-03-25 00:14:27 UTC
    2454
  152. Weird, Weirder, Yet Weirder 2017-04-09 20:59:20 UTC
    4333
  153. Who Sends Babies to Fight? 2017-04-22 18:38:44 UTC
    2591
  154. Side(?) Battle: Double Sun Power 2017-05-29 18:26:42 UTC
    3540
  155. Lightning Round: The Facades We Wear 2017-06-17 17:02:05 UTC
    1780
  156. Study Hard, Study Often 2017-07-22 06:16:14 UTC
    2445
  157. Spear & Rainbow of Justice 2017-10-12 22:59:53 UTC
    3410
  158. Lightning Round: Two to Tango, Dragons & Darkness 2017-11-19 16:59:25 UTC
    1673
  159. Dragon: Lord Vs. Legend 2017-12-16 18:30:02 UTC
    2606
  160. Outtakes: In No Particular Order 2017-12-21 23:26:49 UTC
    1410
  161. My Spidey Sense is Twitching 2018-01-08 00:59:55 UTC
    2993
  162. Dual-Pistols At Sunset 2018-02-08 20:43:37 UTC
    3479
  163. Alola, Nightmare! 2018-02-24 03:18:38 UTC
    2661
  164. Q Ain't Never Had A Friend Like Me 2018-03-18 01:32:54 UTC
    3469
  165. You're Going to Need Stitches! 2018-04-07 21:10:09 UTC
    2816
  166. Secret Agent "P" 2018-05-05 22:36:23 UTC
    4440
  167. Under Lock-Heart and Trick-Key 2018-05-28 17:26:55 UTC
    2975
  168. Lightning Round: Fake Fire 2018-06-09 15:21:12 UTC
    3077
  169. But Hey, That's Just A Battle... A Death Battle! 2018-07-01 08:33:28 UTC
    3038
  170. It's More of a Purple Realm 2018-07-29 17:02:15 UTC
    3888
  171. Lightning Round: We Couldn't Fit It All In 2018-11-17 23:09:33 UTC
    3442
  172. Side Battle: Oh... YES! 2018-12-31 22:50:57 UTC
    3222
  173. Battle Royale: Main 7 vs. The Crystal Gems 2019-03-29 15:53:23 UTC
    7324
  174. Lightning Round: Pick A Card 2019-04-13 19:28:57 UTC
    4652
  175. Edgy Much? Moving Forces 2019-04-28 23:15:23 UTC
    3835
  176. Sidekicks Scuddle 2019-05-18 23:33:46 UTC
    2933
  177. Lightning Round: Anything Is Possible 2019-06-07 15:10:22 UTC
    1857
  178. A Hero Emerges 2019-06-17 18:38:41 UTC
    3109
  179. Lightning Round: Fighting Game Genre 2019-06-27 20:45:14 UTC
    2147
  180. Deception Infection 2019-07-20 20:25:29 UTC
    3030
  181. The Lesser Light 2019-09-22 00:02:36 UTC
    2296
  182. Lightning Round: Spider-Verse? 2019-12-01 21:07:05 UTC
    2411
  183. Lightning Round: Hollownest vs. The End Trio 2020-03-14 15:47:58 UTC
    2070
  184. Lightning Round: He Will Never Be A Memory 2020-12-16 16:15:41 UTC
    1320