Life's Left Hook

You recognize that smell...

Is that...

Waffles!

You glance behind you.

Candy isn't cuddling you anymore; she's up and about.

Makin' waffles!

You're about to get up, but when you try to sit up, you feel like you gained a hundred pounds.

The doctor is still grappled onto you.

You try to grab her and pull her off, but it doesn't work too well.

"Doc? Come on, I gotta get up. Let go."

"Noooooo... You're warm..."

Her protests are muffled by your chest, which her snout is buried into.

"Come on, doc. Cadance is making waffles. I want to eat."

"Can you bring me some?"

"Aren't you getting out of bed?"

"No?"

"Well why the fuck not? It's noon already!"

"Exactly."

You grumble a bit.

"Fine. I'll bring you waffles."

You pry her off of your chest, set her down, and step out of bed.

"Vith syrup," she interjects as you make your way to the kitchen.

"No shit. Waffles aren't waffles without syrup," you say, chuckling a bit.

Thank you!"

After stretching your back, cracking your neck, and letting out your inner pornstar moan while doing so, you moisten your mouth and start walking to the kitchen, passing Trixie and Octavia on your way there.

They're on the couch, cuddling in an odd position.

That can't be comfortable.

Eugh, Octy's neck is going to ache when she wakes up.

And you didn't know legs bent that way...

You debate whether or not to wake them up, but...

You decide to leave them be, and carry on.

The waffles are calling.

You make your way to the kitchen.

Sure enough, Candy is standing there.

Makin' waffles.

You would have made a joke about Donkey, from one of your old favorite movies...

But, not only would it go right over Candy's head, but also she would probably take a lot of offense to it.

Resisting the urge to let your inner Shrek loose, you walk forward and give Cadance a quick pat on the back.

"Mornin', hun," you say, smiling.

"Good morning, sunshine," she replies with a coo. "Sleep well?"

You nod.

"You're really warm, you know that?"

She nods as well.

"And the doctor was onto you like a tic on a dog."

"I noticed."

She chuckles. "There isn't room for two on that bed, you know."

After shaking your head, you turn around and take a seat at a nearby table.

It'll have to do.

"Well, that's too bad. We have to make room for four. Plus one, since we have a bedridden doctor for however long she sees fit."

You hear a muffled protest from the bed, but you shake it off.

Cadance lets out a small hum. "...You know, I change my mind. I don't like sharing," she says playfully.

There WAS a bit of truth behind that...

Sheesh...

"Well, too bad. Everyone wants a piece of this hot pie."

"It'd be a shame if someone... Stole it."

You give her a sly look.

"Oh? Who would do such a horrible, horrible thing?"

"I'm sure a sly fox can get away with it once or twice."

And, a moment of silence later, it hits you.

You're out of witty comebacks.

"Well, uh... I can see how that could... Work..."

With that, Cadance turns to you, forgetting everything she was doing.

She trots over, looking at you with those beautiful purple eyes.

Her eyes are half lidded, and she brings her face right up to yours to speak in a quiet voice.

"Now, do you know what I see?"

You look back into her eyes, a smirk on your face.

"Hmm?"

"I see a nice... Hot... And saucy blueberry pie..."

After standing on her hind legs, she presses her body against yours, and grinds up against you.

She reaches behind you, and you hear something click on the counter.

"And, with that, I see a young, spry fox, just waiting to pounce. That pie looks so delicious, I'm telling you, but it's missing something."

You feel one of her forelegs wrap around you and pull herself in.

"On, and what's that?"

Cadance lets out a lustful giggle, pulling something from behind your back.

"I went to the grocery store this morning... Got a little somethin'..."

"And what might that be?"

An audible click his heard, as well as the rattling of a plastic cap.

"Well, take a guess, Anonymous... What's the pie missing?"

"Something on top?"

"Of course."

*FFFFFFFT*

You hear a spray next to your right ear, and something cold hits your neck.

Next thing you know, Cadance is reaching forward, and she drags her tongue up from your shoulder along your neck.

You see whipped cream curl up on her tongue, and after her first lap, she takes her tongue in her mouth and swallows.

She gives you the most seductive of looks, wiggles her round hips, and leans her face even closer than it was before.

"I ran and got some whipped cream for tonight, lover boy, thought it'd be fun."

"I like the way you think..."

With that, she tilts her head to the side, closes her eyes, and leans forward for a kiss.

You feel her soft, warm lips press against yours gently.

You push back with the same tenderness she delivers, parting your lips to welcome hers.

They glide against each other, your warm saliva working as a lubricant.

Soon after, she pulls back, and looks at you with a squint.

"You... You're too damn cute. I can't stop myself. I usually have my urges under control, even around Shining..."

You raise an eyebrow.

"Shining? Wouldn't he be happy having a nympho in his bed?"

She scoffs, and shakes her head.

You have no idea. He may be a manly man, but he has -no- sex drive at all. It's honestly amazing how he can't get the thing hard."

Dear god, you don't know if that's funny or just plain tragic.

"Well, you sure solved that problem..."

"I sure did~!"

She lets out a low hum of happiness, gets off of you, and...

Turns back to her now burnt waffles.

"Egh. Damnit."

"You burnt the waffles?"

"Yeah," she sighs, defeated.

Suddenly, an idea comes to mind.

"Not all of them, at least."

She looks at you, and shakes her head.

"Actually, that was all of them."

Your smirk grows, and you look at her.

"No it wasn't."

"It wasn't?"

She pauses for a moment as your devilish smirk evolves into a full-on shit-eating grin.

It takes her a moment, but she finally gets it.

She looks up at you with that same, sultry look as before.

"Well, I only have one of those."

"Who said we wanted to share?"

She chuckles again, unplugs the waffle iron, and starts trotting back from where you came.

"I suppose I shouldn't keep you starving. After all, a man has to eat..."

"And I'm damn hungry."

She giggles again, and trots to the other side of the bed.

The doctor looks confused.

"Vhat's going on? Vhere are ze vaffles? ...And vhy do you smell like you just-"

As she's struck with realization, she snarls at Cadance.

"Oh. So zat's vhat I heard you two blabbering about."

"Eeyup."

Cadance hops in bed, chuckling.

Aperta looks like she is 10,000% done with your shit.

"You're not even going to tell me to move, are you?"

"Nope."

"Incantevole."

She sighs, rolling over.

"Don't make much noise. I'm still tired as hell."

"Okay, doc. I'll try to keep the noise to a mini-"

*KNOCKNOCKNOCK*

The three of you turn to the pounding door.

The knocking wakes up Trixie and Octavia as well, and they look in confusion.

"I'll get it," you utter, letting out a sigh.

So damn close to breakfast, too...

With a heavy heart and a heavy crotch, you open the door.

"Hello?"

A small pony looks up at you.

She's grey with a blonde mane, small, and ridiculously cross-eyed.

You almost giggle at it, but you keep your composure.

"Uh, hello!" she hollars, smiling wide.