Life's Left Hook

"Howdy."

"I have a letter! For the princess! Is she here?"

You look at Cadance.

She's just as confused and surprised as you are.

"Uh, yeah, she's... Here."

She digs out a letter from her saddlebags, and holds it up to you.

As she does this, she looks a little worried.

"I hope I'm not interrupting something. You look kinda mad. Are you mad, mister?"

YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA, LITTLE GREY HORSE

"Oh, no, it's fine," you say, taking the letter. "Mind if I ask what this is for?"

The mare shakes her head. "I can't say. It's for her eyes only. I don't know what's on it."

Huh.

"Were you told anything about it?"

She shakes her head again. "No, I wasn't. But I was told to deliver it from Canterlot fast, so it's probably really important."

Well that's just fucking peachy, Miss Ditz.

"All right. Thank you. I'll give it to her."

"Thank you!" she hollars, trotting off down the hall.

And running face first into a mop bucket.

The bucket spills, and she drops back onto her haunches in pain.

You try not to chuckle at the poor mare as you close the door behind you.

You glance at the letter, a little bewildered.

Trixie and Octavia are on the couch, looking at you expectantly.

"Well, what does it say?" the blue one asks, an eyebrow cocked.

Octy clings onto Trixie like a young suckler.

Cadance hops out of bed and trots over to you, taking the letter.

"Great. Just what I needed," she mutters, tearing open the letter.

"Let's see what this is..."

The paper has a decal or two on it. It looks official.

You try to take a glance at it, but you're too far away and you don't feel like bumping Cadance as she reads.

And, as she reads the letter, worry shows on her face, and her eyes start to widen.

Eventually, her jaw drops.

Anxiety builds up inside of you, and you decide to speak up.

"Uh, Candy? What's... What's it say?"

She glances up at you, and then back at the paper.

"...It's... Shining."

Oh.

Well this can only mean sunshine and rainbows then.

"What's he say?"

"No, it isn't FROM him, it's ABOUT him."

That's probably even worse.

"What's up, then?"

Trixie is on the edge of her seat, and Octavia is right beside her, holding her in a hug.

The doctor's attention is even piqued, and she rolls over to face Cadance as she speaks.

"After they were done with whatever they were doing in the castle, he just... Disappeared. He's AWOL, and now Spitfire's running the Crystal Empire!"

Immediately, there's a small uproar in the room as confusion and panic settle into the hearts of everyone in the room.

"Shining is AWOL?" Trixie asks, genuinely surprised.

"Gone!" Cadance replies.

"Vithout as much of a vord?!" the doctor interjects.

Cadance shakes her head. "...No. Not a word."

"Wait, -Spitfire- is taking his place?!"

Everyone looks at Octavia, the slowpoke of the room.

And, after a long silence, Octavia laughs sheepishly.

"Yes, Spitfire," Cadance says, nodding. "She's my 'replacement' until I get back. I didn't plan on Shining pulling this stunt, though."

"Funny enough, I thought he'd -want- to stick close to -Spitfire-, of all ponies. But, I guess not. I wonder whose legs he's ran off with this time."

There's a short silence, and the doctor looks at the floor.

"Vait, so you knew?" Aperta mutters, taking it in.

"Of course I did. Do you think I'm blind? I can see those two have more chemistry than the Cloudsdale Rainbow Factory. There's a reason I set them up like that."

"Then again, he -would- be in for a rather nasty surprise come a month's time or so," Cadance says, chuckling.

You let out a huff, a bit shocked.

"Wait, so you set them up?"

"Uh-huh."

"Even though you knew they'd be boning each other every day?"

"Uh-huh."

You're a little shocked.

And a little disgusted.

"...I thought you said he had no sex drive."

"Not for me. He has a thing for, mmm... Eh, it's hard to explain. Spitfire's a total hardcore bitch, to put it bluntly, and that's right up Shining's alley. Evidently I wasn't enough."

So that's what Ol' Nessie was, then.

"But why would you do this?"

Cadance chuckles again, rolling your eyes.

"You'll see, Anonymous. Eventually. It'll all come together soon enough—I know it will."

With that, she folds up the letter, stuffs it in her saddlebags, and looks at everyone else in the room.

"Well, after that, Anonymous, I'm sorry. I don't think I can make any more waffles."

FUCK.

"But, I am hungry. Who's up for breakfast?"

"Me!"

"I am."

"Vhy not?"

"I guess."

"Just one question, though."

Cadance turns to you, an eyebrow raised.

"Yes, dear?"

"I think Octy has a question."

You point to Octavia, who has had her hoof politely raised for the past couple of minutes.

"What is it, Octavia?" she asks, turning to the mare in question.

Octavia lowers her hoof, and looks at Cadance with a worried look.

"Are you going to go looking for him?"

Cadance shakes her head. "No, I can't. There is already a search party trying to find him in the Crystal Lands outside of the Empire itself. It's dangerous there. Not only that, but I'm not willing."

"You should still at least put some effort into finding him, or finding out what's wrong."

Cadance lets out an irritated sigh, and shakes her head again.

"Why should I? He already left me in the dust. I don't see any reason I should go after him again."

Octavia gives Cadance a rather blunt look, and continues.

"Even though he has wronged you, that's still no excuse for you to not try to help him. Or, at the very least, investigate a little. Do you not feel for him?"

"It's debatable," Cadance says with a gulp.

"Did you not feel for him?"

"It's... Hard to explain, Octavia. I know I did, but now..."

"If it was true, it shouldn't have changed. Well, perhaps a little, but not nearly as drastically as you're making it out to be, Princess."

Cadance tries to console the lump in her throat, and responds.

"You wouldn't understand. You don't know what it's like."

She shakes her head. "No, I don't. But, love is love, and care is care. Forgiving is an important thing, and kindness another."

Cadance grits her teeth a little, and looks down. "It's incredibly hard to do after all we've done, Octavia."

She nods. "I could about imagine. You just need to find it in you. He's your husband, Cada-"

"No, he's NOT!"

The silence that follows is cold and bitter.

You can see tears well up in Cadance's eyes as they slowly change color.

The deep purple hues slowly change into a glowing emerald green.

It sends a fearful chill up your spine, and you take a step back.

Cadance grinds her teeth and half-glares at Octavia, trying to hold back the floodgates.

"I'm filing for a divorce as soon as this whole shindig is over. I'm staying with Anonymous," she says, turning to you, "as well as whoever he decides to live with."

The princess looks at Trixie and Octavia for a moment, before dropping her head.

"It's over. It's been over. It's not going to carry on, not with what he's done."

Octavia hops off of the couch, and trots up to Cadance.

"Princess."

Cadance looks at Octavia.

"Please, can you try to calm down? You're getting riled up, and it's scaring all of us."

Cadance glares at Octavia for a moment, but then, her expression softens.

She wipes her eyes, takes a deep breath, and nods.

"You... You're right. I just need to calm down a bit."

"Want me to get you a drink?" the cellist asks, gesturing towards the fridge.

"Please," Cadance responds, nodding. "Something cold. And... Fruity."

"I'll get you some juice," Octy responds, trotting to the fridge.

As she does this, you walk up to Cadance and put your hand on her back.

Immediately, she leans on your leg, and buries half of her face as she waits patiently for her drink.

You look around the room.

Trixie has her head low; she must have been sent on a little detour down memory lane at all of this.

The doctor, by now, has rolled over, and is trying to sleep.

You start gently betting Cadance, and soon after, Octavia comes back with a glass of juice.

Cadance takes a gulp, and lets out a sigh as her ears fall to her head.

"Better?" Octavia asks, offering a light smile.

"A little," she responds.

Tavi nods, and puts a hoof on the princess's shoulder.

"Now, look, Cadance. I know it won't feel right, but you have to help him. If you don't, you might lose him. Then, you'll feel even worse, even though you think it won't."

Cadance considers her words, looking at the ground.

"Well, what can I even do, at this point?" she asks, taking another sip. "...Go out there myself? I'll get myself killed."

"You can at least try to find out where he may have gone. You know Shining better than anyone here. You could really help."

The princess nods again. "But still. I feel powerless. I don't have any resources. I don't even know where to start!"

Suddenly, a voice from across the room cuts in.

"You seem to be forgetting your biggest resource, Principessa."

Cadance raises an ear, and looks at Dr. Cuore with one eye.

"And that is..?"

Dr. Cuore chuckles a bit.

"Think, Princess. Vhat has my business been all of zese years? ...Besides medicine, ovviamente."

There's a short pause before the princess raises an eyebrow.

"I'm well aware of your... 'Abilities', Doctor Cuore, but I'm afraid that not only is it slightly illegal at times, but also I doubt you have any ties to the Crystal Empire."

okay what

You stand there, a bit confused as the two keep talking.

"You vould be surprised, mio amico. It runs deeper zen even you know."

Cadance raises her eyebrow even higher, and turns her head.

"Maybe later. Once I decide what I'm going to do. But, until then, Doctor, just..."

"Just keep your head low. Literally and metaphorically. I can see that nasty lump on your head."

The doctor chuckles, rolling over again.

"Very vell zen. As you vish."

"Oh, and if vone of you could be a dear, can you get me an ice pack and some painkillers? Maybe some vino? Zis headache is going to be ze end of me."

Trixie turns to the doctor, a tad confused.

"Isn't alcohol a bad idea? Especially after such an injury?"

The doctor nods. "If I stand up, sì. I have no intentions of doing so, however."

"Now, you four go have breakfast vithout me after I get my pills. ...Oh, and bring back vaffles. I vant vaffles."

With that, Trixie gets off the couch, and Octavia and Cadance look at you.

You lead the way out the door, and out of the hotel.

Although, you did this while distracted.

You were still trying to piece together what exactly happened, is happening, and what might happen.

No easy task, certainly; it's so distracting you almost push on a pull door on your way out.

After your three princesses chuckle at your bumbling idiocy, you step outside.

"Okay, where to?" you ask, turning to Octavia.

"We need to go to the ground checkpoint," she says matter-of-factly, pulling out a map. "We need to go there, dock a flight to Windsoar, and then get our hooves enchanted. ...Or, well, in your case, your feet."

You raise an eyebrow.

"Why?"

"So you can walk on clouds? None of us are pegasi, you know."

That made sense.

But at the same time none of it made any sense at all.

Fucking Equestrian laws of physics.

"Ah, gotcha," you bullshit, following Octavia's directions.

After what seems like forever, you four finally arrive at the checkpoint.

All that walking started to make your feet and chest ache.

Christ, you're in bad shape...

After taking a deep breath, you look at the three others in your group.

"Welp. I'm the only one here that hasn't gone travelling at one point or another. What should I expect?"

Cadance grabs your attention by speaking first.

"Well, technically, Windsoar is it's own country; it declared independence from Equestria, and this is a border checkpoint. If it weren't for me, you would need your passport."

You nod, and as you consider her advice, Trixie speaks up.

"Also, with your clothing, you can expect quite a pat-down. Security is rather tight here, due to some odd occurrences in the past."

"...Gotcha. Are they doing to shove a hoof up my ass?"

"No," Octavia says, "But they won't really be polite. Keep that in mind."

You nod, turning to face the door of the checkpoint.

There's a flier, it tells about what papers you need and, if necessary, who to talk to for the spell on your hooves.

Or claws. Or paws.

Or, in your case, feet.

Not wanting to charge in head-first without knowing what the hell to do, you turn to your ladies.

And gesture for them to go ahead of you.

"Ladies first," you say, with a sheepish grin.

Cadance chuckles at you and your antics, and walks in front of you.

Trixie rolls her eyes, and follows Cadance.

Octavia seems to understand, and tails Trixie.

You follow Octavia, and look ahead.

A line of at least 250 ponies in front of you is all you see.

Fuck...

5 hours later

You finally passed through the border checkpoint.

After an argument with Trixie, telling a perverted joke so funny Octavia burst out laughing and fell to her knees, and somehow managing to get the entire room of 200+ ponies to sing 'The Sun and the Stars' in unison (complete with a full dance routine, costumes, and Cadance as lead soprano), you walk out of the checkpoint.

God, you love this wonderful world.

Unicorns are waiting for you to step up; they systematically cast the spell on passers-by, and it works like a charm.

You, Cadance, Octavia, and Trixie all walk through.

It takes them a minute to figure YOU out, and they have to take off your shores, but they manage.

Then, almost there, all that's left is the journey up.

A 755 step flight of stairs.

"Are."

"You."

"Fucking."

"Kidding."

"Me."

Cadance and Trixie chuckle at your dismay, and Octavia scoffs a little.

"Poor Anonymous," Octavia says. "Now, let's get going. I have to do a couple of legal things before I go to the recital hall."

You grumble.

"Fuck you guys."

"You're already way ahead of yourself, dear," Cadance says, trying to stifle a laugh.

You groan louder this time as the group collectively chuckles.

"You know, I'm the alpha of the pack."

"This whole planet, spare the Griffin Kingoms, is a matriarchy," Trixie says, starting to chuckle herself.

"Well, I- I- Fuck."

You were out of witty remarks there.

The group starts chuckling again, and you start making your way up the spiral staircase.

Suddenly, you hear a little raspy voice from behind your group.

The voice of a young filly, it seems.

"Oh, MOVE IT!"

Oh, great, screaming ki-

Wait.

Hold up.

Ho-Ho-Hold the fuck up.

You knew that voice.