Argue Crew in Equestria

James

"The nerve of him, James!" Rarity shouted as she paced from one end of the room to the other. "Coming into the boutique to say all that to poor Sweetie Belle? Why, if the police hadn't shown up as fast as they had, I don't know what I would have done!" James chuckled. "Well, don't worry. He's as good as dead now. You heard the police, right?" Just moments ago, Marba had ran off after sweet-talking Sweetie Belle. James had no idea why Marba would do such a thing when a fine mare like Rarity was in the house, but he felt like he knew all along that Marba was a filly fiddler.

"Either way, if he tries to come back here, I'll make sure not to let him get to Sweetie." He assured her. Rarity scoffed. "Which reminds me, he was your friend, correct? You let him into the boutique, putting Sweetie Belle in danger! Why didn't you say anything about his...desires?" "Woah, I didn't know anything about his filly fondling fetish!" James defended himself. "What matters is that he can't get to her from here on out." Rarity turned to him. "And I can trust you to keep him away when you were the one who told him where Sweetie and I lived in the first place?" She replied. "Trust me. I know Marba like I know the bottom of my hoof. If he tries to get anywhere near us, I'll make sure to deal with him." James promised.

"Fine." Rarity answered. "But if I hear anything about Marba getting back in here, it'll be out with you." James nodded. "Ok, ok." He said. "I'm serious!" She exclaimed as she went upstairs. Goddamnit. James thought after she left. Marba's going to fuck up my chances with Rarity if he comes back. I have to find a way to make sure he'll be unable to get back here... After thinking it through, James came up with a plan. I'll hunt the bastard down and turn him in. He'll be out of my hair AND I'll look like a hero.

The next day, he announced his plan to Rarity and Sweetie Belle during breakfast. "I'll be going on a man- er, ponyhunt!" He exclaimed as he took a bite of his meal. "Goodness, James. Are you sure you'll be able to find the fiend?" Rarity asked him. "One hundred percent." He answered. "Like I said, I know him like the bottom of my hoof. I'll be able to find him in no time!" Sweetie Belle chimed in with her approval. "You go, James!" She cheered. "Take care of Marba for good!" "Woah, there. I know you hate Marba and all, but I can't go and murder him. I'll be handing him in to the justice system and let Princess Twilight decide his fate." James replied, much to Sweetie's displeasure.

After breakfast, James began his search for Marba. The road in the Everfree Forest was difficult to follow, with a trail that was nearly indistinguishable to the terrain around it. It only took James half an hour to get lost in the dark, sp00ky forest. "Damn it!" He shouted, stomping the ground. "How the hell am I supposed to find Marba like this?" Just then, James heard the rustling of (jimmies) leaves from the darkness. "James, is that you?" A voice called out to him. "Marba?" He asked, nearing the bush. Marba stumbled out of the bush, doing his best to stay up. "Of course. Who else would it be?" Marba said. "What the hell are you doing out here, anyways?" James had forgotten how Rarity had rekt him the night before. His eye was swollen and there were bruises all over his face. "I explained everything to Rarity. She wants you to get back to the boutique as fast as you can. She sent me out here to find you."

If I tell him that I'm here to take him in to the police, he sure as hell won't follow. James thought to himself. "Really?" Marba asked. "I was afraid she'd hate me forever!" James laughed. "Of course not. It was all just a misunderstanding." James insisted. "So, you know the way out of here?" Marba asked, looking around their surroundings. "Well, no..." He answered. "But I'm sure we'll be able to get out of here. How hard could it be?" Marba scoffed. "Well, I've been limping around here since last night, and I haven't been able to find my way out." James shuddered at the thought of both of them getting lost in the Everfree Forest forever. "Well, let's try to find our way out together, eh?" He said as he went over to help Marba walk. "Don't worry, I'll walk you through it. Rarity beat you up good, huh?" "Fuck off." Marba retorted as they left the area.

Even with the both of their heads combined, they couldn't find a way out. "We're never getting out of here!" Marba lamented as they walked. Just then, James could have sworn he heard another pony nearby. "Shut it!" He said in a hushed tone. "Someone's nearby." The two of them hid behind a tree when they saw the shadow of the pony nearing them. The figure appeared to have been carrying something on its back. Once it came into view, James let out a sigh of relief and revealed himself. "Zecora!" He shouted, galloping to her. "Huh?" The zebnig turned to see James and Marba heading towards her. "I do believe that my eyes have deceived me, for I see two ponies running from behind a tree!" Zecora said. "We're real!" James assured her. "And we're in desperate need of your help!" Zecora smiled at them. "Aye, but first let us return to my abode. I have spent many, many hours on the road." She replied as she begun leading them to her house. "Oh god, she actually rhymes..." Marba muttered as they followed her.

"You two got lost on the trail, you say? Well, in the forest, it's hard to tell night from day." She said to them while they sat in her home. Ugh, her rhyming is terrible. James thought to himself. "Yeah, it's a long story." He said with a shrug. "I'm sorry to ask for so much, but could you see to it that my friend's wounds are healed up?" Zecora frowned. "I will gladly care for your friend, but I fear that another's life has come to an end." She said in a dreary tone. "What?" James asked, confused. "You see, I have a wounded friend, too. She's a young pegasus by the name of Scootaloo."