Of God Eaters and Ponies

(Nighttime CMC Clubhouse)

[Ruby’s P.O.V.]

        You know there are certain things I pretty much dislike. Being the center of attention, getting lectured at by my foster parents, and being targeted because I’m different. Now those I can get over it, but being attack by two certain jackasses from the Elements of Harmony twice…...Yeah if it wasn’t for the fact that I’m friends with the CMC, then I would of wreck them all in less than a few seconds. I mean honestly you think they would’ve learn from before that can’t beat me. Ugh buck it, I don’t care anymore…...wait did I just say buck?

*KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK*

“If that you at the door Applejack, then buck off I’m not in the mood to deal with any of your crap today!”

“It’s us dweeb. Trixie, Gilda, and your fan Applebloom.” Gilda said as she open the door to the clubhouse. “Granny Smith wanted us to bring your dinner, seeing how you didn’t want to have dinner with us due to you and Applejack fighting with each other.”

“To be fair she started when she tried to lasso me in towards her.”

“Either way Granny is talking to Applejack and Big Mac about what happened yesterday and today.”

“Okay…..wait what do you mean by yesterday?”

“Applebloom told Granny Smith about the death threats that Big Mac and Applejack gave to you.” Trixie explained.

“Yeah which kinda got me in trouble with Applejack and Big Mac. They’re giving me the silent treatment.” Said Applebloom sitting next to me. “So I figure I might as well hangout with you seeing how things are getting kinda awkward in the house at the moment.”

“Guess I kinda screw you over huh?” Great looks like I made her siblings piss at her. “Sorry about that.”

“Ah don’t worry about, this wouldn’t be the first time I made them mad like this. Give them about a few days or so to cool down and they’ll be talking to me in no time.”

“Okay.” I said as I notice Gilda and Trixie smiling awkwardly at me…..what the buck? “Care to explain why you two are smiling like a bunch awkward nerd?”

“Well…...um.”

“Twilight came by a few hours ago and wanted you to meet her and the rest of her friend at the library early in the morning.” Said Gilda. I bucking knew it. It’s either to lecture me about what I did to those little brats or to teach me the lesson on friendship.

“Something tells me it’s either because of what I did to those little brats or my lesson on the magic of friendship bullshit.”

“Trixie believe it’s both.”

“Figures much.” I said as I laid back onto my sleeping bag. “Ugh I just wanted to hang out with you and your friends and not to deal with crap like this.”

“Oh come on it can’t be that bad?”

“Gilda I just got a death threat from Applebloom’s siblings, and I was attacked by your former friend and Applejack. How can it not be that bad?”

“Okay you got a point there dweeb, but hey it could’ve been worse.”

“Yeah I guess you’re right on that.” I sighed as I stared out the window looking at the moon. “Ugh I get the feeling tomorrow is going to be a pain in my flank.”

(Morning)

        Today was the day I’m suppose to learn about the magic of friendship. Ugh as if this wasn’t a pain as yesterday, now I have to deal with these six idiots teaching me. Dammit now I’m wishing that some kind of monster attacks this town so I can save it. Then again I don’t want them to attack me again so I might as well suck it and get it over with. A few minutes of getting dressed and trying to avoid Big Mac, I started my walk towards Twilight’s house after getting the directions from Applebloom.

        “Why do I get the feeling that Twilight lives inside a giant castle?” As if fate answered my question I looked up to see a huge ass castle made of crystals. “Oh buck you fate.” I said as I knocked on the crystal door. I mean seriously where the hell does this bookworm get the money to have a house made of crystals? I knocked on the door again only to get no response, during that time waiting my stomach started to growl. “Oh right I forgot I had to run out of the farm.” Not like I had a choice in leaving, it was either that or fight with Big Mac and lord knows I don’t want to send him to the hospital…...yet.

“It’s a good thing I saved up all that money to buy eight-hundred cheeseburgers.” I said as I reached into my portable storage to reach for one. “Yep, still fresh out of the grill.” I took the wrapping off and started to eat it. “At least I can still eat meat with this pony body.” As I leaned against the door of the castle, I suddenly fell back as the door opened up to reveal a teenage dragon wearing a purple hoodie & baggy pants.

“Oh sorry didn’t hear you knocking on the door there.”

“It’s alright kid. Question who are you?”

“I’m Spike the dragon, I take it you must be Ruby right?”

“I guess Twilight told you about me huh?”

“That and from the conversation she’s been having with the and rest of the girls this morning.”

“Great…..So I take it you heard about what happen with me and the dragon?”

“You kidding me? Almost everypony knows about in the newspaper.” Spike then showed me todays newspaper with me standing on top of the dead dragons head….Wait how the buck did anypony other than those six pony know about this?”

“How the hell did anypony know about this?”

“Somepony was there on the mountain looking for something, when he saw you fought that dragon. I have to say that was pretty cool.”

“Wait you’re not angry or pissed that I killed a dragon?”

“Not really, it’s not like he was my friend or anything. Plus I didn’t even know there was a dragon living in the mountain. So why should I be angry?”

“Apparently your friends are.”

“I’m sure they’ll get over it. Come on, I’ll take you to Twilight and the rest.”

“Ugh…..This is going to be such a pain in my flank. As if it wasn’t bad that they attacked me twice, but know I have to learn “The magic of friendship” from my attackers? Somepony just kill me now.”

“Oh come on, it can’t be that bad?”

“Prepare to be surprised.” A few moment later after following Spike, we made our way to the room where Twilight and her friends were in. The moment Spike open the door everypony in the room stopped talking and glared at me. Well only the country pony, the rainbow maned idiot, and the fashion diva, but the rest just pretty much looked at me.

“Sup.” I said as I took another bit out of my hamburger.

“Oh good you made it.” Said Twilight. “I was worried that you wouldn’t be able to find my home.”

“It’s not that hard to find a huge castle made of crystals in the middle of Ponyville.”

“R-Right, right. Do you want anything to eat? Seeing how you came here this early in the morning, I’m pretty sure you must be hungry right?”

“No thanks I’m already eating.” I said as I show them the burger I’m eating.

“You’re eating a hayburger this early in the morning?” Asked Rarity who looked disgusted.

“The hell is a hayburger?”

“That’s what you’re eating idiot.” Said Rainbow Dash who I flipped the middle finger at.

“This isn’t a hayburger it’s a hamburger.”

“The hays is a hamburger?”

“Take away the hay and replace it with meat simpleton.” Upon me say that their face changed from annoyed to shock. Then again now that I think about it just dawned upon me that I’m in a land full of ponies so they pretty much don’t eat meat.

“Y-You eat meat!?” Asked Fluttershy who was now hiding behind Rainbow Dash.

“Well yeah I been eating meat since I was a kid, why?” Yeah maybe I should’ve taken Twilights offer for breakfast, mostly because I get the feeling that one of them gonna end up telling someone in town about me eating meat.

“H-How can your parents let you eat something like that?” Asked Rarity.

“What’s the big deal?”

“What’s the big deal!? Ponies don’t eat meat!”

“Yeah well I’m not like most ponies.”

“.....You’re sick.” Applejack said looking at me in disgust.

“What’s the big bucking deal it’s not like I’m eating pony meat or anything!” Really? Are these ponies that upset just because I eat meat from other animals?

“Twilight you sure Celestia want us to teach her instead of taking her to the dungeon?” Asked Rainbow Dash.

“Up yours the rainbow color freak!”

“What you call me!?”

“Did I stuttered? I called you a rainbow color freak, got a problem with that?” I asked as I flipped her off.

“Oh you are so-.”

“GIRLS!!! ENOUGH!!!” Yelled Twilight as everyone in the room turned their attention from me to Twilight. “We are not here to judge other ponies about their lifestyle, we are here to talk about teaching her the meaning of the magic of friendship like Celestia asked us to do.”

“Oh joy I get to learn the magic of friendship from you five idiots.”

“Who are you calling a-.”

“Rainbow Dash.” Rainbow Dash turn her attention towards Twilight. “What did I say?”

“..........” Rainbow Dash said nothing but glared daggers at me, which in turn I stuck my tongue out at her.

“Wait why did you say five instead of six?” Asked Twilight.

“Personally I have more respect for you then the rest of your friends seeing how you were sorry for attacking me for no reason on top of that mountain with the dragon. So you’re okay in my book, but for the rest of your friends they are not on the list.”

“Well…...that’s something to take note of. Anyway we’re here to discus about who will be first that will teach you the meaning of friendship. Normally I would teach you first, but seeing how I’m a little bit busy with other stuff I’ll Rarity start first.”

“Oh great I’m stuck with the drama queen?”

“I would refer you don’t call me a drama queen if you would be so kind?” Rarity asked walking next to Ruby. “And yes seeing how nopony else would do it, I take it upon myself to teach the meaning of Generosity and to act like  proper lady.”

“........No.”

“Excuse me?”

“I said no.” I said as I started to head towards the door. “I have better things to do then to learn a useless lesson about the meaning of friendship. Not only that but I prefer to learn from someone who isn’t a stuck up snob and a drama queen.”

“I am not a stuck up snob nor a drama queen!”

“There’s a dirty spot on your dress.”

“WHERE!?” She asked looking around her dress to find the stain I told her that was there. Geez this girl has some OCD problems, and not the normal kind but the bad kind. Second after looking over herself she couldn’t find the stain and looked up to give me a death glare.

“Like I said snobbish drama queen.” Before I left the building I take one last look at Twilight. “Feel free to stop by the clubhouse if you want to talk to me Twilight.”

(Ponyville)

“UGH! This bucking sucks!” I mean really is it too much to ask for a normal day without dealing with those idiot? Seriously I been here for what a day or two and they just keep attacking me like I’m some kind of freak or something. If I wanted to be treated like a freak I would of stayed back home with my foster family…...on second thought scratch that, I think I prefer to deal with them then my foster family. Sigh it’s bad enough that my speech is starting to changing, I don’t need a bunch of tree loving hippies attack me. Just try to relax Ruby. Focus on your match with Celestia you’re gonna be having in a month so for now just relax and train.

As I made my way through Ponyville I was getting some rather….questionable looks. My guess is either it’s because of my aragami arm, me killing the dragon, kick those six ponies flank, or what I did to Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. I decided to try something out as I look at the ponies that were looking at me, only to look in different directions while pretending to act like they’re busy. Yep it was because of what I did. I paid that no mind as I head towards a tree to sit down under it.

        “Okay so from what I got from my run in with Twilight, her friends, and that bitch of a moon princess that tried to look into my dreams. I can guess that she pretty much as strong as they are seeing how they can use magic and can fly in the air.” I reached my arm for one of my wings to have a good look at them. “Now I gotta figure out how to use these wings to fly. I could always ask Gilda, but I get the feeling she might end up mocking me…..again. No way in hell I’ll beg for teaching lesson from that rainbow color jerk. Crap guess I’m gonna have to learn how to fly by myself then huh?”

“I wouldn’t suggest doing that kid, it doesn’t always end well for those who try to do it themselves.” Said a mysterious coming from above me. I looked up to see a yellow pegasus with orange & yellow mix mane wearing a light blue jumpsuit with a yellow lightning shape on the front. “So you’re the pegasus that everypony from Canterlot. Hard to believe that you’re the one that fought a dragon and survived.”

“If that’s how the monsters are like here, then that dragon was nothing compared to the stuff back home.” I said as I pulled myself up from the ground.

“Really now?”  Spitfire was circling around me looking at me up and down like I was something that interested her. I don’t weather I should be worried about this or not, but at least she’s not attacking or think I’m some kind of freak. “Tell me, do you know how to fly?”

“No.”

“But you’re a pegasus, every pegasus should know how to fly when they’re just a little filly or foal. Didn’t you have some kind of school that taught you how to fly, or at least your parents?”

“I prefer not to talk about that.”

“Well guess what missy, you’re going to be taking flight lessons.”

“From who?”

“From me Spitfire, leader of the Wonderbolts.” She said as she floated behind me and touched my left wings. “Geez what have you been doing to your wings? These feathers are covered in dirt and…..blood!? When was the last time you preen them or take a bath?”

        Huh, now that I think about it I haven’t taken a bath since I ended up in this technicolor world of sunshine and rainbows. Taking a good look at my wings I guess she was right. “I don’t know what preening is, and for the bath thing I haven’t gotten a chance to take on since I got here. Not to mention with all that happen to me I kinda forgot to do that.”

“That’s no excuse for poor wing management.” Good point I guess. “Starting tomorrow we’re going to get you cleaned up for your flight lesson.”

“I don’t have that much of a choice do I?”

“Not by a long shot.” She said as she took to the sky. “Meet me by the train station in one week for a trip to Canterlot spa. Don’t keep me waiting.” With a wink and a blink of an eye, Spitfire flew off towards Canterlot.

“Well……..That was something I didn’t expect to happen this morning.” I said pulling out my headphones and started to listen to my music. “Well at least I get to go somewhere for free this time, instead of paying for with my own money.” Yeah Ricky would always have me pay off any debt or bill that he or Johnny had when they bought too much stuff from the shop. It took me fifty missions to pay off and to get all my money back…..Sigh…...Dammit Ruby stop thinking about the past, you can’t blame yourself about what had happen. Just move on and try to adapt to the new life you have now…….as an anthropomorphic pony.