For thousand of years she had no desire to raise the moon in her sister’s stead during her banishment. However, since her sister’s demise by her own hooves, such a thought only solidified in its conviction to something far more sorrowful. Now she believed she had no right raise Luna’s mysterious and yet beautiful celestial object through the night sky.

The dazzling rays of moonlight, bathing Equestria were not as a pleasant to look at anymore. At times like these at night staring down from her balcony, she reminisced on the good times with her dear sister, smiling and chuckling to each and every memory as it filled her with pride and a hope that one day she would return by her side.

But now as she looked upon the rooftops of the other buildings within Canterlot under the full moon’s silent gaze, nothing but pain lingered. In her eyes, the moonlight bathed her once peaceful kingdom in a shade of blood.

The blood of her sister, she had sacrificed to save them.

No matter how hard to tried, she continued to cry whenever she was alone; yearning for a comfort that was vile and villainous.

She wanted to torture Discord that little bit more to fill in the empty hole inside of her chest Luna’s death had left behind.

Breathing heavily, she turned her gaze down towards Canterlot Gardens, noting the vacant empty spot that Discord once stood at.

Celestia had kept her promise to Twilight and had moved him to a safer location, deep beneath Canterlot Castle, within the dungeons… where she had disposed of him.

Bile rushed up her throat as she felt suddenly pleased with herself, painfully swallowing back hard as a hoof lifted up to place against her muzzle.

“What is going on with me?” Celestia wept, “why does it feel right when I know it is wrong?”

Settling back onto her haunches, Celestia bowed her head and kept her eyes low to the ground, barely able to bring herself to look up at Luna’s night sky, attempting to try and push aside the thoughts to which has brought this once great monarch low.

Everypony makes mistakes. But killing Discord? That was just outright murder; and it was a murder she had greatly enjoyed enacting. He had overstepped his imprisonment and had attempted to corrupt Twilight Sparkle; HER faithful student.

“I have rid Equestria of an evil.” Celestia affirmed to herself, turning her gaze up towards the moon. “I had no other choice. Imprisonment was… eventually, I knew he would escape from our prison, Luna. We were wrong in thinking perhaps one day he could become reformed. Just like I was wrong in that you could… that you would come to me.”

Celestia stood up, attempting to hold herself with some sense of decorum befitting a Princess.

“From now on, I must do what is necessary to protect my Equestria. I must not show weakness. I must do all that I can to protect my little ponies from evil, no matter what… and if such beings must perish? Then so be it.”

Turning about to head to her bedroom door with the inevitable meeting between Maredonia and Saddle Arbia tomorrow weighing heavily upon her mind, Celestia had finally come to her conclusion on how to deal with these two nations’ breakdown of negotiations on a particularly sensitive subject matter, involving a territorial dispute that Celestia had thought was dealt with hundreds of years ago.

“If they will not cooperate and abide by the original law laid down by their ancestors, then they will have no choice but to agree to my ultimatum. If they refuse that, I will have to take more drastic measures to ensure peace. No pony will die and no pony get hurt over this silly dispute; that I will make sure of.”

Throwing open the bedroom door, Celestia turned down into the darkened hallway to head straight for the royal kitchens, feeling suddenly peckish. Though, in passing, she noted a small amount of light coming from Twilight Sparkle’s bedroom, which was located fairly close to her own.

Celestia smiled softly, knowing full well her student would be wide awake studying. Rubbing her eyes with a hoof, she cleared up an excess tears and gently tapped upon the bedroom door, speaking softly as she did so in a slight disapproving singsong.

“Twilight Sparkle, is it not time for bed?”

A scurrying of hooves animated on the other side , including a yelp and series of dull thuds which Celestia assumed to be from a falling pile of books.

Celestia’s smile only deepened as she intruded in Twilight’s room to discover Twilight attempting to pull herself out of a pile literature. The Princess merely chuckled.

“P-Princess, I… I’m sorry the room looks a mess but I was—”

By that point, Celestia had switched off. She enjoyed Twilight’s worrying demeanor at times and if the truth be known, Celestia almost enjoyed making her skittish within her presence. Deep down inside she knew it was a bit sadistic of her, but it was only a bit of harmless fun on her part to watch her most prized student fumble over her own words.

“Princess?” Twilight asked carefully, noting how strange Celestia was staring at her. “Is everything alright?” A realization came over the lavender mare as she placed a hoof to touch Celestia’s own. “Is it about Luna?”

“No,” Celestia droned monotonously, before shaking her head and reaffirming her warm and friendly tone of voice, “no, Twilight, I am just… I just wanted to see how my student is holding up during her rigorous evening studies.”

“Oh!” Twilight beamed, turning about as she practically bounded her way across the bedroom towards another pile of books. “Well, I was studying the old texts that talk about other such cultures, such as Saddle Arabia, the mysterious northern part of Equestria that was inhabited by the mythical Snow Ponies and of course the Gryphon Empire in its infancy.”

Celestia looked up to the ceiling, chuckling as she nodded. “Those were all very troubling times indeed.”

“Yeah… there seemed to be a lot of fighting back then.” Twilight nodded with a frown, before looking up at Celestia. “Princess, can I ask a personal question?”

Blinking, Celestia merely nodded. “Don’t be so silly Twilight, you know very well you can ask me anythi—”

“Did you ever... love somepony?”

Well, that took Celestia by surprise.

Speechless for a few seconds, Celestia simply released a nervous chuckle. “Well, yes. Once I did love somepony. But that was a long time ago. I feel as if I had outgrown the need to feel the love of another.”

Twilight placed down her book, looking curious and yet cautious. “Why?”

Celestia tilted a brow towards her student, disapprovingly.

“I-I mean, if you don’t mind me asking that is!” Twilight twiddled her hooves, blushing a little.

Shaking her head, Celestia looked upon Twilight with her most gentlest of smiles. “Because my love is only for Equestria. I cannot afford to love somepony else specifically over the rest. My dedication to my little ponies as a whole was once not as strong as it is now. But… that was because I once loved a pony so much that he… changed. Became something else.”

A sadness grew in Twilight’s expression, placing a hoof to her own chest. “I-I’m so sorry, Princess. I didn’t mean to bring up any painful memories.”

Lifting a hoof up, Celestia silenced Twilight’s worry with a chuckle. “It is fine, Twilight Sparkle. I have long since pushed such feelings aside for it was a mistake that I had learnt from. Something that made me grow into the mare you see today.”

“Will you… ever love again?”

Both mares locked eyes as the question hung in the air.

“Sorry…” Twilight whispered, “I didn’t mean to...”

Celestia stared long and hard at Twilight before she slowly turned away to depart Twilight’s bedroom.

With both of Twilight's ears flattened against her head as her heart drummed against her chest as an overwhelming sadness pushed tears to the corners of her eyes, unsure as to why she had to go and say such things so openly to the Princess.

But a part of her knew.

A part of her wanted to know if she had a chance.

Bursting forward, Twilight moved to interject between Celestia and the door, her eyes wide with guilt. “I’m so sorry! I won’t ever ask again. I did not mean to upset you; it was poor timing to ask such questions considering what you have gone through and, well, it has always intrigued me and I just—”

Twilight was cut short as a set of lips pressed lightly against her own.

Celestia parted the kiss and kept their faces a mere inch apart as a desire burned deep within her eyes that drew in all of Twilight's attention. “I have already fallen in love with somepony, Twilight Sparkle, but I am afraid to do anything about it. It would be a scandal amongst the gentry and the nobles that their Princess; a teacher, is in love with her own young student.”

“P-Princess?” Twilight barely managed to whisper.

“I know you love me; more than any student should, Twilight, but we can never be together. It would be wrong and I cannot afford to ruin my image and cause a slight unrest within the nobles over such a matter. I am sorry.” Celestia turned, an usual expression of stoicism present that left the rejected Twilight Sparkle staring numbly after the Princess she loved more than life itself.

“But,” Twilight felt tears fall down her cheeks as she shook her head side to side, “it isn’t fair.”

Princess Celestia paused at the foot of the doorway to glance back towards Celestia, frowning sadly. “You will grow to love somepony else, Twilight.”

“No,” Twilight affirmed, struggling to keep her tears in check as she took a quivering step forward towards Celestia, “it isn’t fair that you have to be alone. I-it isn’t right! I don’t know the details of what happened in the past with your past lover but, P-Princess, you don’t have to be alone anymore.”

Celestia bit at her lower lip. “You’re young, Twilight Sparkle. Trust me, you will look back in the future at this moment and realize that this was never meant to be.”

“Y-you need me,” Twilight nervously advanced, oddly confident though expression none of it on her face, “you cry every night alone in your room; and you can’t say you don’t because I can hear you. At least, please, tell me how I can make your sadness go away… I know I can never replace Luna, but, at least allow me to help you somehow. I-I don’t want to see the pony I… I…”

“Remain being my most faithful student, Twilight Sparkle. Advance in your studies and grow into the most wisest of unicorns I hope will one day even surpass Starswirl himself. Have a family and grow old with somepony you can be with that will not hurt you in the end... that alone will suffice to make me happy.”

“I-I love you,” Twilight pursued in the face of rejection, “I-I know I am young and I-I know it's ludicrous for me to even seek your affection; I know there is a gap between us when it comes to social status and duty and age... b-but isn't love supposed to be one of the strongest powers in all of Equestria? Does not love and friendship conquer all?"

Celestia simply stared down at her own hooves. “I am not so sure, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight noted the Princess’s body trembling. Cautiously and somewhat boldly in the act itself, she placed a shaken hoof upon Celestia’s rump and gently guided her to turn around so the young mare could look up into her mentor’s troubled eyes.

“I was afraid of my feelings would never be returned, but now that know you love me too, I almost think I can take on anything that can come at us! I won't ever let it bring me down no matter what!” Twilight shook her head and smiled sweetly through her tears. “Tell me what it is that scares you and I will do my best to make it go away, much like you had did with me so many times when I was just a filly. I want to be there for you like you were there for me...”

Celestia’s heart melted in her chest, despite the walls she had erected around it, there was nothing she could do to defend herself against such a display of affection.

What am I doing, Luna? Celestia thought as she felt her lips crash against Twilight’s own in a heavy and abrupt kiss. Do I even care anymore?

Author's Note

Well, this chapter came out of the literal-fucking-nowhere. My next chapter was supposed to be something completely different but... yeah.

There's some corruption in this chapter so I will allow it.

Like, hate, flame... all good.