One Night with Celestia

Celestia slept peacefully that night, probably the best night’s sleep she had in a while. She dreamt about Lavender and the time she spent with him. Maybe she should do something like that more often, the thought lingered. Realistically, she couldn’t, all those late nights would eventually start to add up and affect her work throughout the day. Still, she could dream.

“Rise and shine,” a voice said as a large volume of cold water dumped all over Celestia.

She let out a sudden scream as the shock of the cold water woke her from her slumber. Luna was standing next to the bed holding an empty bucket with her magic and, again, flashing that big shit eating grin.

“You bitch,” Celestia cursed as she shot a mean glare at her sister.

“That’s for dumping coffee on my head last night,” Luna retorted.

“Yeah, well, the coffee wasn’t freezing cold,” Celestia pulled herself out of the bed, shivering a bit as she did. “Now I have to change the sheets again.”

Using her magic, she started to pull the wet sheets off of the bed. Luckily for Celestia, the blanket managed to deflect or absorb most of the water, and only her head and upper chest got soaked.

“Get out of my room, Luna!”

Luna departed, snickering a bit as she did.

That was one way to wake up in the morning even though it wasn’t Celestia’s preferred method. She made short work of removing anything that was wet, which was just about everything on the bed. She loved Luna, but sometimes she really pushed it as a sibling. This wasn’t the first prank that Luna had played on Celestia, nor would it be the last. Celestia grumbled to herself at the thought of that. Now that everything was off the bed so it could dry, and after she dried herself off, it was time for some coffee, breakfast, and her normal morning routine before getting started for the day.

Later in the day, Lavender roused himself from his slumber. Because of his late shift he normally slept until sometime after noon, and today was no different. He went about his normal routine before his shift later tonight which included taking a shower, making lunch, checking his mail, and running any errands he needed to before the shops closed for the day. He browsed through his mail while he ate his lunch for the day, nothing too out of the ordinary until a letter written on royal letterhead caught his eye. ‘From the office of Princess Celestia’ it read across the top. Since paper mail was the primary form of communication in Equestria, great advancements had been made in mail delivery. Mail was usually sorted and delivered several times a day by a large team of pegasi since they could fly and move a lot faster than an Earth pony could. Lavender opened the letter and started reading:

Lavender Bloom,

I am in need of a full time masseuse. I know you have the qualifications. If you’re interested, stop by my office at 4:30 p.m. today. Present this letter to my secretary and the guards will let you in.

Sincerely,
Celestia

Lavender smirked to himself; even though the letter didn’t mention it, he knew it was in response to last night. Guess he had made that much of an impression for Celestia to give him a job offering.

He glanced over at the clock on the wall, which shown about two hours before he had to meet with Celestia. He quickly finished his meal and focused on getting his errands out of the way now so he wouldn’t be late for the meeting. A meeting with the Princess demanded punctuality and he didn’t want to make a bad first impression by showing up late now that a job offer was on the table. The letter reminded him of what he thought about last night during his shift. Was this all just a coincidence or did Celestia want this to happen? Again, he convinced himself that it was just a coincidence.

Celestia was in her office sending out various important memos to ponies that covered a wide range of responsibilities. It was one of the more boring aspects of her job, but at least she didn’t have to deal with any annoying delegates like she did yesterday. A sharp knock came at her office door, followed by a member of the royal guard poking his head in.

“Your four thirty appointment is here, ma’am,” he spoke.

“Send him in,” Celestia replied without looking up from her paperwork. She sent off one last letter and looked up to see Lavender standing at the other end of the room.

“Ah, I see you got my letter,” she explained. “Long story short, I had to let go of my previous masseuse, and after last night you proved that you are more than qualified for the position. Its full time pay plus benefits. Interested?”

“Absolutely,” he answered.

“Good,” Celestia said “I hate to cut this short, but I need to take care of a few more things. Could you wait out in the lobby? I’ll come get you when I’m finished.”

Lavender gave a quick nod, then exited the office. Celestia wasn’t trying to be short with him; when she was in her office, it was all business. She was used to speaking quickly so she could finish up one task and go on to the next one without much lag time.

Lavender sat out in the lobby where Celestia had instructed him to. The professional setting made him feel like a colt sitting outside of the principal’s office in elementary school, waiting for the principal to call him inside to lecture him about something he did wrong. The lobby was alive with activity with various administrative staff buzzing around going about their business, royal guards doing their normal patrols, and everypony in between carrying out their normal day to day routine inside the castle. It all made him feel a little intimidated. Mainly it was the guards; they all looked like they took their job very seriously, which they did since they were all sworn to protect Celestia with their life. So, it was best not to get on their bad side. Not wanting to dwell on that thought any longer, Lavender tried his best to focus his mind on other things and not seem overly nervous around the guards.

Lavender’s train of thought was interrupted when Celestia’s office doors swung open. The two guards flanking either side of the door snapped to attention and gave a sharp salute as their leader walked past.

“Lavender, come, walk with me,” she spoke, approaching him.

He obliged by quickly jumping to his feet and joining by her side.

“Daisy? Hold my calls, I’ll be back in a couple of minutes,” she ordered her secretary.

“Yes ma’am,” replied the mare sitting behind the front desk.

Celestia then turned her attention back to Lavender as the two walked down one of the many long hallways in the castle.

“I already talked with your supervisor about you taking over this new position. It’s a day shift position so we’ll give you some time to get used to working days again,” she explained.

“I never got a chance to say thank you, so, yeah, thank you,” Lavender said.

“Don’t mention it. Like I said in the letter, you proved your worth,” Celestia admitted. “My last masseuse was…dealing with some issues that started to affect her work, so I had to let her go.”

“I see,” Lavender said, not knowing what else to say.

Approaching them from the opposite end of the hall was none other than, Princess Luna. Celestia let out a quiet groan of frustration at Luna’s sudden arrival. How did she keep showing up at the worst possible moments?

“So, this must be Lavender?” Luna spoke in a friendly tone, her eyes giving him the once over.

Celestia gave her a ‘if you say anything, I’ll kill you’ look, which Luna promptly ignored.

“Yes ma’am,” he replied, being respectful to the princess.

“Yes, Luna, this is Lavender Bloom, my new masseuse,” Celestia said through almost gritted teeth.

“Oh, your new masseuse?” Luna took a step closer to Lavender. “So, tell me Lavender, when will I get a taste?” she nuzzled his neck. “It was so lonely being locked away in the moon for a thousand years. It’s been awhile since I’ve felt the warm embrace of a stallion.”

No, she fucking didn’t. Celestia was now in pure horror; her mouth hung open like she was unable to close it. First the rude awakening this morning and now this? Celestia was fine with Luna doing something like this when the two of them were alone, much like her playful ribbing last night, but to do it front of another pony was completely uncalled for.

“Wha…I…,” Lavender stammered. He didn’t know what to say; he was just as shocked as Celestia was. Did Luna know what they did last night? His mind was in a panic; he didn’t know what Luna would do with that information if she did indeed know what happened.

Luna pulled away from Lavender knowing the poor stallion was probably frozen in horror, which he was. She shot a glance over at Celestia.

“Oh, by the way, I’m a little more open-minded than my sister,” Luna added. “Come by my bedroom whenever you want to fool around with a real princess.”

Celestia’s expression now morphed to one of pure rage. Her eyes were like daggers and pierced through Luna like a hot knife through butter. It was like she was saying ‘I’m going to kick your ass later’, and she felt like blurting it out loud.

“Well, you two have fun,” Luna continued down the hallway, snickering to herself.

“Well, now that I’m thoroughly embarrassed,” Celestia finally mustered the strength to speak. She used a bit of humor to try and lighten this embarrassing situation, although it didn’t work too well.

It took a beat, but Lavender finally managed to speak again.

“Was…sh...she being serious?” he stammered.

“Don’t worry about it; she’s just all talk. She’s like that one sibling that always has to embarrass you. I plan on talking to her later about this,” Celestia explained. “So, anyway, where were we…”

The two conversed for a bit longer, mainly Celestia trying to put Lavender at ease about what had just happened with Luna. In the back of Celestia’s mind she wanted to give Luna a talking to about that. There was no way she was going to let Luna get away with this. Celestia bid farewell to Lavender so she could get back to her responsibilities for the day, and so Lavender could deal with any errands that was necessary for the job change over.

Celestia didn’t see Luna the rest of the day which was probably a good thing since she was going to let her have it. She still could not believe Luna did that in front of Lavender. What was she thinking? Eventually Celestia and Luna would have to meet for when the sun was lowered for the day. Celestia kept her emotions in check for when she next saw Luna; she didn’t want to lose her temper and do something she might regret.

The day had finally drew to a close. Celestia took her position on her office balcony with Luna, who was oddly quiet, standing there nearby to take over for the night. Once the last sliver of light from the sun disappeared behind the horizon, Celestia quickly focused her attention on her sister.

“What was that earlier today!?” Celestia demanded, giving her sister a furious look.

“What?” Luna replied with a bit of innocence in her voice.

“You know damn well what! You also should know that I like to keep a professional atmosphere around here,” Celestia lectured. “I thought you were more mature than this and wouldn’t pull a stunt like that. You embarrassed me in front of Lavander, and you probably embarrassed him too. I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t even show up to work anymore,” she slowly shook her head. “I am very disappointed in you, Luna.”

Luna was caught off guard by her sister’s scolding. Normally Celestia handled things in a calm, collected manner. Only very rarely would she get angry like this.

“But I…,” Luna started.

“You know what? No, I don’t want to hear it,” Celestia interrupted. “I’m going to bed.”

Celestia turned to leave; she didn’t want to deal with this anymore right now. It was fine with Luna joking around with just Celestia, but not whenever it was in front of a pony that she barely knew and a potential new employee.

“Look, I’m sorry, okay?” Luna uttered.

Celestia came to a stop when she heard her sister apologize. A part of her felt bad for yelling at Luna like that, but she had to follow the rules like everypony else.

“I know I took that joke a little too far, and for that I apologize. I should have been more mature, but I wasn’t. If you want me to, I will apologize to Lavender at the first opportunity tomorrow,” Luna added.

By now, Celestia had turned to face Luna while she spoke. She wasn’t expecting an apology like that so soon.

“It’s just that…,” Luna nervously pawed the ground. “Never mind,” she pushed the thought away.

“No, go ahead, you can tell me,” Celestia said. She was curious about what was bothering Luna; a bit of concern welled up inside her.

“It’s just that, when I found out about you and Lavender…I got a little jealous,” Luna admitted. “You know it’s been awhile since I was last with a stallion.”

“Oh, Luna, you know how these things work, they just happen,” Celestia reassured. “I wasn’t trying to rub it in your face. You’ll find a nice stallion someday.”

“What if that day never comes? They aren’t exactly lining up to go out with me,” Luna said with a hint of sadness in her voice. “I guess they’re all afraid I’m going to turn into Nightmare Moon again.”

Celestia knew there was a chance it could happen, but only if Luna let those dark forces take her over like she did that first time. She hoped and prayed that it never happened because she could not bear to banish her sister a second time.

“That is the one thing that I can’t help you with,” Celestia said. “Only time will heal a wound like that.”

Celestia comforted her sister the best she could. It was all she could really do right now. Her mind flashed back to the time she had to banish Luna to the moon. It was a decision that weighed heavily on her heart.

“If you’re ever dealing with anything like this and need someone to talk to, you can come to me and I will make the time to talk to my little sister,” Celestia said.

Luna smiled as she nuzzled Celestia’s neck as a sign of sisterly affection. She was glad to have such a nice, caring sister like Celestia. This whole situation could have gone a lot worse. Celestia could have just scolded Luna, then left without hearing what she had to say.

“I love you, Celestia.”

“I love you too, Luna.”

As the two shared a tender moment, Celestia thought for a bit of something nice that she could do for Luna.

“If you’re up for it, I’ll talk to Lavender tomorrow and see if I can get him to give you a massage.” Celestia offered. “I know it won’t help you find a stallion, but it might make you feel better.”

Luna pulled away from Celestia, a bit surprised that she offered this, but then a small smile crept on her face.

“Thanks.”

“However, no funny stuff,” Celestia added.

“I promise,” Luna chuckled.

“I mean it, Luna.”

“I give you my word that I won’t try anything,” Luna promised. She wasn’t planning on doing anything, at least not so soon after the tongue lashing Celestia gave her.

On that note, Luna raised the moon so that she could start her nightly watch, and Celestia retired to her bedroom for the night. She was glad that she and Luna resolved this issue.