The Shadows of War

0200: Wake up and cry.

0245: Rush to the bathroom, throw up.

0315: See something familiar, usually orange, freak out and cry like a foal again.

0400: Go back to sleep with Rainbow Dash sitting next to me.

0600: Wake up, sit up hard enough to fall out of bed. Cry again.

0700: Counseling. Pour guts out to Time Turner. I hate that guy.

0800: PT with Rainbow Dash. Feel humiliated at managing to hardly pull five miles per hour.

1000: Go to Sugarcube Corner to hang out.

1200: Lunch! Pinkie makes something delicious, and I eat it.

1500: Rainbow Dash gets off of work. We head home.

1700: PT again. Ugh.

1730: Bedtime. Bid Rainbow goodnight, but then cry self to sleep.

Thus was the routine I had been following for the past four days. In three more days was Hearth Warming Eve, and I had already told mom that I couldn’t make it to Cloudsdale. It was currently near Manehatten, and that would take me nearly a week to get there. She told me she was happy with her new partner, Azure Skies, and that they had been dating for a few weeks now. It was a bit weird, as Azure was one of my friends, but it was better than some guy friend telling me he had shacked with my mom.

The morning of December twenty second dawned bright. For the first time since I had arrived in Ponyville, it was very sunny out in the morning. I sat up, and for the first time, I was happy. Birds sang outside, I didn’t have counseling today, Rainbow still had to work but that would mean that either I would stay home or that I would get to spend the day at Sugarcube Corner. With my diet and exercise, I had already gained seven pounds back of muscle, and you couldn’t see my ribs anymore. Whatever was in my meds was AMAZING. Thank sweet Celestia for medications!

I smiled as I sat up and looked out the bright window. Heading out, the kitchen was empty. Rainbow Dash no doubt was sleeping in today, as I had not awoken her that night. The kitchen held an arcanotech coffee maker, and I set about mixing the morning brew we usually both enjoyed. Next was to look over my meds. Carefully I set them out on the counter so that when Rainbow Dash came out she could verify that I took them. I had taken them on my own once and she had been upset, but that blew over when I broke down again. Lifting a mug of steaming caffeine to my lips, I sighed happily and looked out the window. I had been feeling like a foal all week, but today I was a stallion. Today I could take the morning. Today-

“Morning Wing. Whats up?”

I turned, dropping the mug and staring. Blaze stood in the hallway with her back to Rainbow's room. My head spun. She cant be here. Its an illusion. I’m hallucinating. That's not her.

She advanced, and blood began to pour out of her mouth as she gasped, leaning forward. I caught her, and the walls around me changed to canvas. All around us were the sounds of battle as she looked up at me, her dull eyes reflecting the light, although no light of her own could be seen in them. Her lips moved.... “Why... you traitor...”

“ITS NOT MY FAULT!” I yelled. “Its not my fault! She said it wasn’t! Stop it!”

I backed away, and she fell down. A hand landed on my shoulder, a massive spade of a hand. Turning, I saw Iron Hoof there. Blood ran in rivers down his front from many bullet holes, and his eyes were missing. In one hand he clutched a gryphon head, and he grinned at me. “At least mine meant something. Your worthless ass couldn’t do shit there, and I saved you. Pity I wont ever go home, but hey, at least you get to go back. Have fun, you traitor.”

Turning in a circle, hundreds of copies of Blaze, Radio Wave, Wire Tap, Shining Silk, and Iron Hoof surrounded me. Murmers reached my ears as tears fell down my face. Looking down, I was holding my canteen upside down, and blood mixed with whiskey spilled out. It puddled on the ground, forming a face... the face of the burned foal in Saint Feathersburg. Pitifully, it looked up. “Why did you kill us? We couldn’t fight...”

Finally, there was just one more. “I hope my brother shoots you. You left me.”

“STOP IT! PLEASE STOP!”

I sat up, tears in my eyes. Rainbow sat next to me, grabbing me around my shoulders and pulling my head into hers. “Shh, its okay. What was it this time?” she asked, tiredly.

Unable to respond, I just held onto her as if she were a life raft. I sniffled, eyes red. The clock read zero four hundred behind her, and I felt sick. Still, I gripped her hard, and she rocked back and fourth a bit, sighing. “Its allright. I'm here. I gotcha. Just lean on Dash, okay?”

I nodded. “I-Im s-s-sorry... I c-c-cant s-stop.... I-Im n-not a foal...” I said, over and over. Some mornings I could nearly belive it. But I wasn’t going to let go or refuse to feel it.

Finally, after what felt like eternity but was just ten minutes, I was able to draw a few deep, shuddering breaths and lean back. Wiping my eyes, I gave her a watery smile. “Th-thanks... I-Im so sorry...” I said, but she shook her head, the dark rings under her eyes stretching out a bit.

“I had a bit of an idea of what I was getting into at the hospital, and I don’t HAVE to keep you here. But I am NOT gonna let you go until you are all better. You slept nearly four hours at once this time... might as well get up though. How's your stomach?”

“Fine... I don’t think I'm gonna toss cookies this time.”

“Legs?”

“No cramps.”

“Arms?”

“Hurts from pushups.”

“Lungs?”

“Burns a bit, but less each day.”

“Wings?”

“Not a thing. I can still move them a bit though” I said, looking over my shoulder to confirm they rustled. I could move them fine. I could even get a foot off of the ground, but then I couldn’t feel the air currents properly and would crash to the side. The nerve damage had yet to get any worse though.

“Alright... if we get lucky, maybe that will heal up too. Pinkie Pie will be gone today, heading out to Appleoosa for a delivery, and the cakes are out of town too. I think this is the first time in two years Sugarcube Corner is closed on a weekday... hmmm...”

I looked at her. “Im gonna get dressed if we are getting up, okay?” I asked. She nodded, but didn’t move. A moment later, I flushed a bit. “Um Dash... may I do so in privacy?”

She nodded. “Oh, sure! Sorry! If you need any help, let me know as usual, okay?”

I nodded, but let her leave. Finally pulling myself into my raggedy tee shirt and shorts, and then a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt on over that, I stashed a pair of mitts into the chest picket and walked out, yawning. Dash was brewing coffee int the kitchen, the phone on her shoulder. “-yeah. Okay. Sure, if you can just stop on by, we are both up. Half an hour? Big Mac? Okay. Hey, tell Applebloom to tell Scoots I would like it if she can have my treadmill fixed by next week. I love the little squirt, but I NEED that treadmill. Thanks! Bye.”

She hung up and looked at me. “So... take a seat, Wing. I got some good news and some bad news.”

I sat down, sighing. “Last time someone said that to me was four months ago, and they were telling us we had to switch to eating sauerkraut two meals a day with turnip stew the third, but at least we could eat. PLEASE tell me it is better than that?”

She snorted. “Yeah, a lot better. I found a place for you to stay, so that you don’t get harrassed by Silver Star, but it's out at Applejacks. You don’t know her yet... She is one of my friends, runs an applefarm.

“Hey... I know that name... Applejack... Applejack... Does she have a relative named Bad Apple in the army?”

Dash shrugged. “Dude, she has so many relatives all over Equestria, I bet she has like ten cousins in the army, and probably three of them are called Bad Apple. You have to ask her. Anyways, no breakfast here, you're gonna eat out there with her. Might spend the night there too... I think I gotta work late tonight. Don’t worry, you'll be fine. Just pack an overnight bag in case, I can tell her about your meds and stuff. She lives about half an hour out of Ponyville by truck, but Big Mac will be coming by to pic you up. He is qualified for medical care on animals, and knows plenty about first aid too.

I sighed. “Alright. I can pack.”

Half an hour later, she and I were out front of her house, shivering in the cold. It was a FREEZING and dreary morning, and at four forty five it was nearly pitch black but for the streetlights. I knew farmers started early, but this was crazy. Besides, it was winter. What did they do during winter? Grow snowbanks?

There was a low rumbling noise on the cul de sac, and an old farm truck sputtered along. It had a wide front cab with small back seats, fit for storing extra cargo, and a wide flat bed in back with what seemed to be handmade wooden fencing around it to help store extra loads, in this case what seemed to be empty wooden crates that smelled strongly of apples.

Rainbow nodded. “Thats them. C'mon.”

We walked forward, and the truck stopped. The wind blew a bit of snow at us, and the tips of Rainbows ears were a bit frosted as the side window rolled down and a yellow mare just out of fillyhood with a red mane and a large pink bow poked her head out. “Whatter y'all doin out in the cold? Its freezin' out here! Miss Dash, this here Steel Wing?”

She nodded. “He has his bag and stuff. Wing, got clothes?”

“Yes.”

“Towels?”

“Yes.”

“Meds?”

“Yes.”

“Toothbrush?”

“Yes.”

“Toothpaste?”

“Yes.”

“YOURS, not mine? Mine is the blue one.”

“Yes, I have the demeaning pink one.”

“Blanket?”

“Yes. And water bottle in case I get ill.”

“Alright. Good to go. This is Applebloom, promising alchemist, and the red one is Big Macintosh.”

The red one nodded. “Eeyup.”

The side door opened and the young mare scooched over. “Pleasure to meetcha! Like she said, Mah name's Applebloom. Ah been studyin natural chemistry, or Alchemy as y'all in big cities call it. Zecora been teachin' me!”

I closed the door and Big Mac turned the heater up on full blast. It rattled, and an old song played on a cassette player before he turned it over to the radio. Getting going, the truck rattled along the road back out of Ponyville. I turned to Applebloom.

“Zecora? That's a zebra name... probably from Zebracity, or the Plains Lands. What is her tribal symbol?”

She stared at me. “Ah don’t know, but she has a funny cutie mark.”

I shook my head. “Zebras don’t HAVE cutie marks. They have tribal symbols. When born into a tribe, the mark on their flank shows what tribe they are in. What does hers look like?”

She smiled. “Some sorta sprialy sun lookin thing. Pretty mysterious.”

I looked back again. “Well, not zebracity. She's from a small clan in the lower Plains Lands. Her tribe was wiped out years and years ago. But that means she probably knows more about alchemy than anyone else in Equestria. I'm surprised she is teaching you... they refused to share even the most basic of knowledge with us in our field hospitals, although I saw one bring a dying soldier back to full health in less than sixteen hours with some sort of brew. They work miracles. Two guys I know owe them their lives.”

She stared at me before Big Mac spoke up. “Ah don’t really like talk of the war 'round the farm. If'n ya don’t mind, Ah'd ask ya to keep that away. Ah don’t mean no disprespect, and ah thank ya fer yer service, but the war hit our family hard. We lost some cousins. So just... don’t go spoutin' war stories in the homestead, okay?”

I looked at him and gulped. He was nearly as large as Iron Hoof, but he looked nothing like him. His build was quite a bit more lean, but he still looked like he could crush a skull in one hand. “Um... sure. I didn’t mean to offend, Mister Macintosh.”

He snorted. “Big Mac. Ah don’t like Mister Macintosh unless yer sellin' something. Then ah get to shootcha. We get back, Applejack should have breakfast ready.”

I nodded. Obviously war was a sore subject, but I didn’t have much else to talk about. The scene outside was still dark, and with the overhead clouds, it was not likely to get very bright today. The gas lights would be on all over town all day, just like they had the past four days. Each day had been nearly the same. I would get up, cry, eat, cry, and then settle down to help Pinkie Pie in the store or stay at home reading. I was somewhat interested in going to school, and from what mom said, I had quite a bit saved up in the bank now thanks to the investor she hired. I had nearly ten thousand bits in my account, and some extra locked up in stocks in something in Canterlot. She had bought some war bonds in my name and I had that money slowly rolling in as well. I was not hurting for money for the time being, but eventually I would need to get a job. Not for many months though.

The red farmer turned the wheel and we left the paved roads of Ponyville, turning onto a slushy gravel and dirt road into the blizzard. With sure deftness, he maneuvered us down the path and past two barns until a driveway came into view, at the end of which was a farmhouse. It was a large homely place, looking to be nearly a hundred years old at the least, a homestead from the pioneer days when Ponyville had been founded.

Pulling the stick into park, he settled it in a garage next to the house and turned the truck off. With a thankful gasp, it surrendered its engine spark and went silent. Outside, the wind raged until the garage door dropped and we got out. Big Macintosh climbed out the drivers side while Applebloom followed me out the passenger side. The interior of the garage was filled with farming tools and an old cider press, but it had a door to the house directly from here. Applebloom smiled at me. “Make sher to wipe yer boots at tha door.

I nodded. Big Mac went in first, and then I wiped my boots, walking in. I expected the house to be creaking due to the wind and snow, but inside it was warm and cozy. I smelled wood smoke and heard a merry fire crackling, and I couldn’t help but smile, remembering time with Grandpa Steel Harness, the only earth pony in my family line. He had been a tool maker, and worked mostly with metal things like shovels and rakes. From him, I knew a bit about farmer folk. They were willing to give anyone one chance, but if you messed it up, it took a lifetime to get their trust back, if you ever could. But you would never find a more loyal friend in times of hardship.

Applebloom lead me inside following Big Macintosh, and there was a table set with four places and an assortment of oatmeal, hayshbrowns, and applejuice. In there, there was an orange mare with a felt hat. She looked up and smiled, walking over and holding out her hand to shake. “Mah name's Applejack. Pleased as punch ta meetcha!” she said, grinning.

I looked at her hand before shaking. “Steel Wing. Pleasure is mine... you're Rainbow Dash's friend?” I asked, gazing upon her. She nodded.

“Tha Element of Honesty, that's me. Dash told me thach yer um... well... ah don’t mean to pry, but yer okay, right?” she said, looking a bit nervous. I shrugged.

“If it is after six in the morning, usually I'm fine. Just a bit hungry now is all...” I said, smiling. “Dont worry... I'm not gonna freak out over every tiny thing.”

There were about four minutes of quiet as the apples finished setting the table and I stood awkwardly off to the side before I was invited to sit down. Taking my seat, I sat a bit too rigidly, drawing their gaze before I took a deep breath and relaxed a bit. “Thank you all for inviting me over for breakfast” I said, looking at them. “I cant really go out and about because of Silver Star.”

At those words, Applebloom winced and Applejack scowled. “Darn ruffian. He used to be fine and dandy till... eh, thats a story for another time” she said, spooning some oatmeal into a bowl.

I shook my head. “I already heard the story... but thanks” I said, smiling at them.

Breakfast was pleasant, if a bit quiet for a while. The food was excellent, all of it tasting very fresh. “This is really good... beats army food by quite a bit.”

Applejack looked up. “Yeah, ah heard that the army food is pretty bad. I'd think they'd give yall good food ta keep yer spirits up.”

I snorted, choking for a minute. “Actually, we had a funny theory about that. One of my buddies, Shadow Step, came up with a theory aided by me.”

“Whats that?” inquired Applebloom.

“Well, we thought that if the food was bad enough, it would keep us fighting hard so that we could go home sooner and be done with it. Our Commanding Officer agreed with us. I guess it worked because it only took half a year to force the gryphon surrender...”

She nodded. “Well, ya don’t have to eat that stuff anymore. Yer welcome ta eat here anytime!” said the yellow mare, smiling up at me.

I smiled back, and enjoyed a quiet breakfast. It was going to be a pleasant day.

After breakfast, I helped clean up. Big Macintosh had to take the truck back out and finish the last zap apple delivery of the year, but when he got back, we all gathered in the living room. I sat on one corner of the couch, turning the pages to a Daring Do novel borrowed from Rainbow Dash. It told of her adventures hiding from Gryphons while seeking the Immortal Chalice, something that could supposedly turn one into an alicorn. The Gryphons wanted their claws on it to grant eternal life, but she wished to put it into a museum. Personally, I probably would have just locked it in a trunk and thrown it into a volcano, as it seemed likely to start another war no matter who got their hands on it.

Eventually though, as heroes always do, she swiped the Chalice from her opponent, eliciting a cry of “Curse you, Daring Do!” and a salute from her. The final page of the book was a personal note from A.K. Yearling to Rainbow Dash, and I frowned at it. “Hey, Miss Applejack... does A.K. Yearling know Dash?”

Applejack giggled. “Does she ever! We all helped her out on one a' her adventures! Ah ain’t really supposed to spread that story around but... we had a lot of fun there. Stoppin' ahouizoutle, and fightin' Inka ponies.”

I leaned back, sighing. She glanced up from her book, the fire crackling between us in the hearth while Big Mac slowly whittled away on a wooden... something. “Something the matter, Sugarcube?”

I shook my head. “No... well.. I guess so. I mean, why are you all helping me? I haven’t done much other than complicate things around here, and I know that I'm not much to look at and that I don’t really get along well with people anymore... but... why did she take me in? Why did she help?”

Big Mac cleared his throat and said “Applebloom... can ya go check out in the barn, see if we got enough hay? Ah think we mighta miscounted.”

Applebloom looked up, but I saw the look in Macintosh's eye, and she nodded and left. Finally, Applejack cleared her throat. “Ah don’t know how much of this ah should be tellin' ya, but... about six months ago, just three weeks before tha start of that war, Rainbow up and got herself fully accepted as a front line flier fer tha wonderbolts. Her lifes dream! And then she hooked up with Soarin. Don’t get me wrong, we all thought it was gonna go good. But it didn’t. Ah cant tell ya tha details, but she and Soarin were NOT a good couple if ya ask me.”

Big Mac nodded. “Eeyup.”

I stared back and forth. “What happened? Did they just not get along?”

Big Mac scowled and the room seemed to get colder. “He hit her. He was bad to her in front of civilized company, insulted her at tha gala, and made a right plot of himself in front of all of us with her.”

I felt confused. “What's that got to do with me? I mean... I know thats bad but... I was kinda having a hard time myself the past few months... sorry if I seem a bit insensitive.”

Applejack shook her head. “Ah understand. But Rainbow is proud. She didn’t say nothin to nobody. She just stopped talkin to us for a month. Then she up and shows up at Raritys place, dislocated wing, bruises all over, crying her eyes out. Ah ain’t never seen someone hurt so bad by someone they loved. But she finally told the story. Twilight told Celestia, and Soarin was investigated. He got charged with several counts of assault, and Rainbow stood up to him and told the full story in court. The next two months were hard... we did our best, but she only got better slowly. A month ago she was finally her old self, racing, and having a grand old time with us.”

Big Mac nodded. “Eeyup.”

I looked down. “So she is better now... but why help me? Why get into another relationship of any sort? Why let a stranger live in her house?”

Applejack sighs. “Ah don’t know. I reckon she sees that yer pretty dinged up yerself, and not just on tha outside. Ya got a good heart, and ya listen. Ah see these things. Ah heard your story from her as well, and ah think she just wants to help someone else heal. She is just as stubborn as me, and she gots a heart of gold. She wants to help.”

I looked down at my hands. They were trembling slightly, and I put them in my lap. “I didn’t know...”

Why is she so nice to me... I throw up pretty often, I cant stop crying in the mornings, she isn’t sleeping too well... but she just keeps on with it. Why do that? It's not like I’m worth that much... just a broken toy soldier...

“Hey, whatever ya got on yer mind, stop it. Rainbow cares for yah, and so do we all.”

I nodded, looking at her and forcing a smile. We all went back to reading for a bit before Applejack said “Shoot, I recokn I better go get Applebloom before she gets lost in this weather.”

Both Big Mac and I absently nodded, and I pulled out the next book in the series. They were really good bocks. It wasn’t until after Applejack left that Big Mac looked at me. “Ah need ta talk to you as well.”

Surprised, I looked up. “What? Did I do something wrong?”

He shook his head. “No. And ah wanted to make sure you don’t. Applejack and I both lost our parents when we was young. Applebloom never really got to know 'em at all, she was just a tiny foal. And now she's taken a likin' to ya. So ah gotta ask yah to promise ta not do nothin hairbrained. If ya hurt Rainbow or yerself, she ain’t gonna like that. We just lost Granny Smith last spring, and ah don’t think she can take another one. We all need our friends, and ah don’t wanna haveta pull her out of tha bar again.”

I looked at him, and nodded. “After how much everyone has done for me... I don’t think I'm gonna turn it down. Thanks for the help” I said, nodding at him. “It really means... I don’t know what... what... what is that?”

Halfway through talking, I became aware of a sound outside. For a moment, I couldn’t make it out, before I heard it more clearly. Past the howling of the wind was another howling, and a screaming. Big Mac looked at me, confused, before his eyes widened. “Timberwolves!” he yelled, jumping to his feet.

I didn’t know what those were, but they sounded bad. I chased after him as he ran to his room and pulled out a hunting rifle, what looked to be a Whinneychester 30-06 with iron sights. A box of ammunition was grabbed and he ran past me to the door. I beat him to it and threw it open, going out and looking across the fields.

It was getting on towards noon, but it was still very dark out. The dull gray light from the sky hardly illuminated anything but... there! On the edge of the forest a few hundred yards away, there were two shapes running from a small pack of four legged silhouettes. They were nearly invisible against the woods... nearly being the key words. I stared as the crys of “HELP! TIMBERWOLVES!” reached us.

Big Mac swore and started running, heading towards them as they ran towards us. My wings may be trashed, but my eyes were fine. I could see them, all six timberwolves, and they were gaining quickly on Applejack and Applebloom. Big Macs hands were shaking and his face was white as he yelled “AHM COMING! SIS! RUN!”

It took all of a moment for me to see the shape of things. My blood calmed down, and the world around me went silent. In exactly ten seconds, the wolves would catch up to Applebloom. The remainder would run down Applejack in a few more seconds, and we would still be nearly a hundred and fifty yards away. But I could make it. I could make the shot.

I turned to Big Mac and grabbed the gun and ammo, yanking it out of his hands. He cursed and turned to me as I ripped open the box and pulled out six bullets, the exact amount that would fit into the internal magazine of the gun. Rapidly pushing them in, my hands were rock steady as I pulled back the bolt, slid it forward, and chambered a round. Time slowed to a crawl.

At two hundred yards, in dim lighting and fair wind speeds, with nothing but iron sights, this shot is impossible for even a Pegasus. The wind would knock the bullet off course, and that was assuming the gun was sighted for that range. I knew that this would most likely be dead on at one hundred yards, so I sighed past the orange mare and lifted slightly. A moment later, Big Mac yelled “YER GONNA HIT MAH SISTERS!” in a panic. I sidestepped his swing, and fired.

There was an explosion of wood behind Applejack, and I fired again. Miss! Another shot and another wolf fell back, limping. Applebloom finally came within fifty yards and dove to the ground. I fired past where she would have been, half the magazine empty as a gryphon hit the ground. The remaining targets kept charging, and I smelled sulfur in the air overhead as I lunged forward, muzzle stretched back in a snarl. They were chasing one of our guys!

With a scream, I ran forward, the rifle going back and fourth while my equipment rattled on my back. It was freezing out, and the three remaining soldiers charging at me jumped and lunged as one of my allies ran past. I lifted the rifle and fired, and he went down, bursting into wood fragments.

Wood?

The next minute I was blinking as I heard “WING! GET BACK HERE! DAMMIT BIG MAC DO SOMETHING!”

I looked back just as two somethings tackled me. With a snarl, I returned my attention to the fight at hand. I mentally swore. I would NOT fall prey to a vision of the past, not now! Not when the yellow filly lying in the snow a few feet away was in danger of being eaten by timberwolves!

Horrible breath filled my face as I kicked one wolf away and the other snapped mere inches from my throat. Holding the rifle across it, I rolled us over and lifted it, smashing the butt of it down over and over again. Finally, it stopped moving and fell to pieces, wood bits littering the ground. The other one rolled a few times and got up, warily circling me. It stopped and looked back and forth between Applebloom and me. I swear I saw a feral grin on its face.

“Don't even think about it...” I warned. It lunged, not at me but at Applebloom. We both raced, it to latch its jaws on her throat, and me to cycle the action. Unfortunately for me, my destiny mark revolved around me killing, and I was very, VERY good at it. Two inches from its mark, I pasted its head across the snow, wood splinters peppering the landscape behind the filly. Four more timberwolves looked at us from a few yards away, the stragglers of the pack, before I leveled my rifle and shot in their direction, the last bullet serving to scare them off. They ran away, their branchlike tails between their legs.

I fell to my knees, gorge rising in my mouth as the rifle tumbled into the snow. Horror ran through me, and my hands shook like leaves in a gale as I stared at them. There was blood running down my arm from a small scratch, and a moment later I heaved onto the ground, tears streaming down my cheeks. I could smell the burnt gunpowder, and I crawled over to Applebloom just as Big Macintosh and Applejack came over. I rolled her over and looked at her, and she blinked up at me. “Ya... saved me...” she whispered.

Ten minutes later were were back inside, where I sat shivering on the couch. Every pop on the fire sounded like an artillery cannon to me, and the flickering lights were belching tank muzzles. The scrape of the rocking chair that they were patching Applebloom's scratches in were the screams of the wounded, but in my mind, one thought reigned:

I had saved a life. Maybe I would become worthy of Iron Hoof's sacrifice.