Author's Note

Did you think I’d abandoned this story?? This is the big one, my baby, my love. Actually, I know there are some key things going on here which is why it’s been so tough to write. Why Acuta? Why the strange powers? Time will tell. In the meantime I’m working on the next chapter. For now I’ll let Applejack and Twilight over in “A Taste of Honey” recover from their wild romp! I have forward chapters of this book written which I can’t WAIT to publish. They are REALLY good - I mean I love going back to read them and I can’t wait to share them with you. Great characters, great action... very cool. Soon...

Good Night

“Now it's time to say goodnight
Good night, sleep tight
Now the sun turns out his light
Good night, sleep tight
Dream sweet dreams for me (Dream sweet)
Dream sweet dreams for you.”
-Goodnight, Lennon & McCartney

The power of it was so immense that even in her sleep, Applejack could sense the security and she reveled in it. It was warm and comforting and shut everything else out. There was nothing in Equestria that was its equal, she could not be harmed here. The love was unquestionable, holding her close and giving her what comforted her. She nuzzled into whatever it was and went into a deeper sleep. It possessed love for her, a love she hadn’t known since...

How much longer it was before she drifted up from its depths she didn't know, only that she became aware that she was now alone. The satin sheets were nice but they were too slippery to allow her to get her legs in a comfortable position - they kept sliding around. She sleepily pulled them up again, and once again they slid down. She scowled, though her eyes were still shut.

“What the hay...” She muttered, reaching out with her hoof and feeling their smooth slipperiness. Pulling herself up to a sitting position, she looked around the dark room.

Reckon I must be in a room in the castle somewhere.

A huge fireplace stood ten feet or so beyond the foot of the bed, it’s mouth glowing with red embers.

This must be for REAL important guests.

Then something familiar registered, something… a fragrance. It was delicate and feminine, it was comforting and full of life, sun and the earth. She pressed a hank of her mane to her muzzle and inhaled. The scent of her Princess of the Sun was unmistakable. Vague memories began to unveil themselves. She lay in Princess Celestia’s bed. The safety she'd felt was the Princess behind her, holding her protectively as they slept. The embrace of a loving parent Right now, more than anything, she wanted to lie down and be held safe again. She called out into the darkness,

“Princess? Princess Celestia?” her voice sounded uncertain, like that of a lost child.

Applejack rubbed her eyes and gazed at the warm embers glowing in the enormous hearth ten feet beyond the end of the bed. It seemed as if the more she looked at them,the brighter the embers grew until small flames erupted, casting a warm light throughout the room. Sore from sleeping in the cold doorway of the inn, the radiant heat felt wonderful against her coat. She let her eyes close and smiled sleepily.

The fireplace was framed by a white marble mantle. Applejack slid out of bed and sleepily walked over to it. Intricate detailed carvings had been hoof cut into the warm white stone and were highlighted by the firelight. The center of the mantle portrayed, in bas relief, the two sisters facial profiles facing away from each other. They looked over a delicately carved landscape that included Canterlot, Ponyville and the Crystal Empire. The tiny carved image of Sweet Apple Acres, sitting high above Ponyville brought a smile to her face. On the wall over the mantle was a huge painting of Celestia and Luna, Cadence and Shining Armour, the Mane Six and Spike. There was a smaller painting to the left of Celestia, Luna, and Twilight with the Apple Family at their farm.

The door to the left of the hearth led into the bathroom. As she entered, Applejack was pleasantly surprised to find the tile floor was warm, “I reckon it’s good to be the princess,” she chuckled, her soft voice echoing off the marble. A small candle lit the room and she could see the toilet. It was located next to a window. She sat down and looked out.

“Woah, even the seat is warmed! “

Down below, a soft glow from the gas lanterns illuminated a courtyard. Snow had begun to fall and the flakes flitted past lanterns casting shadows and damping what little sound there was.

She recognized the courtyard, it was where they had celebrated Twilight's birthday all those years ago. Her friend, had been so gracious, so kind when she saw that awful dress Rarity had made, or rather had not finished making for her, as a birthday gift. Twilight had pretended to love it, though in that moment they both knew the truth and Rarity was so sweet in her answer. There was no shame, no blame, no hurt feelings, that was the depth of the friendship the six of them shared. The young lavender unicorn was celebrating her first birthday with her new friends. That was all that mattered. It was quite a blast.

Applejack, as she washing her hooves, picked up the fragrance of apple in the soap and smiled, feeling a little more at home. After drying her hooves on the thick floor hoof towel, she went back to the window and looked down to the courtyard below, watching the snow. There was a sudden dim flash of light in one of the dark windows of the building on the other side of the courtyard. It was the Royal Canterlot library. She stopped wiping her hooves and stared at the window’s darkened glass. Once again a faint light appeared, growing brighter then suddenly it was gone. What the hay? It’s gotta be 3am! What pony in their right mind would be in a library at 3a-

Applejack froze.

“Twilight?” she whispered.

It was a desperate whisper of hope in her voice and it echoed softly off the walls. She stared intently at the window, straining to make out a shape or a figure. Why would Twilight be sneaking around the Canterlot library? Ain’t no way she could hide in Canterlot. She thought about it for a moment, her eyes suddenly opening wide. “Maybe it’s Princess Celestia!

By the lights in the courtyard the snowflakes were suddenly whipped into a spiral frenzy by a cold blast of wind.

Reckon I best find a robe or something before I head on down there.

The darkness of large closet was suddenly gone as several small torches came on, lighting the interior. Within were a vast assortment of gowns and dresses. Amongst them Applejack found a thick terrycloth robe. As she pulled it on she felt a draft of cool air move past her leg. Applejack had to push the heavy clothes aside as she sought out the source. All the way in the back of the closet she found a small door partly open. Spread there near the door around the floor there were books. The titles suggested they were for little ones - colts or fillies. What in tarnation? One was titled “The Sad Little Windigo - a Story of Hearth's Warming Eve.” Another read “The Lonely Little Pony.” Applejack opened a coloring book. Several of the pictures had been colored in with colored quills, other’s looked like the artist tried using watercolor.

She felt another cool breeze wind its way around her legs. As she pulled the door the rest of the way open tiny torches that lined the walls came alive, illuminating the spiral staircase leading down. Gingerly she stepped down the stone steps, determined to keep the sound of her hooves from echoing off the walls. The flames in each torch on the wall grew at her approach and dimmed as she passed.

What the hay is this? Some kind of secret stairway? The Princess could barely fit down here it's so small.

The bottom of the stairway was blocked by a large piece of fabric hung outside of it. With some effort she was able to push it away and sqeeze her way between the curtain and the wall.

Peering out from behind it she discovered she was in one of the huge hallways of the castle. Across the hall was a very tall stained glass window of Celestia raising the summer sun.

A quick glance up and down the empty hall revealed no more clues. She slipped out from behind the curtain only to discover it was a huge heavy tapestry. The intricate design on the hanging was magnificent. Applejack stood looking at it for a moment in the dim lights of the torches.

After a glance up and down the hallway she recognized where she was and made her way to the immense library doors. It took some pushing but Applejack was able to open one of them just enough to silently slip into the immense room.

Applejack loved the feeling of the thick carpeting as her underhooves sunk into it. She was very careful to be as quiet as she could while she crossed toward the center reading area. She stopped and stood perfectly still, listening.

I reckon Twilight must of spent a lot of time in here. Her hoofprints must be all over these books.

There was no sound, no shadows or light. Her heartbeat was steady in her ears as she strained to hear anything above the silence.

Off in a distant part of the library she thought she heard something. Softly she walked toward it. Muffled voices grew louder as she approached. Quietly creeping between the stacks of books, she felt her heart began to thump faster. The glow appeared again, casting a faint light on the ceiling. What she saw as she peered around the corner of the bookshelf sent a chill down her spine. The castle had been built on a huge slab of marble. It was famous for it, yet there was a large rectangular opening that looked as though it had been perfectly cut into the floor in the middle of another reading area. Carefully she crept up near the edge. Stairs curved down and off to the left and into what must have been a room, though she was unable to see into it. Light from a candle within the room, played soft on the wall and steps. She held her breath and listened.

“Are you quite certain?” a voice asked.

Applejack recognized the unmistakable voice of Princess Luna.

“Yes, your highness,” a pony answered. Clearly young and most likely a mare. “Look at this part of the scroll - It mentions the artifact. “

“Finally! Is there a description given?”

“No my Princess, there is not. I am sorry but I can see no more.”

“Please do not apologize Acuta, you have given me such hope as I can never repay. Look at what we have learned - just as we had surmised it seems that certain events must occur in order for parts of the prophecy to reveal themselves within these scrolls. I am very pleased that our conjecture based only upon the slimmest of clues has yielded such an abundance of useful information. Read that part again, would you? Read the text as it appeared the last time we read it.”

“Of course your Highness. ‘She which shall shatter the sol let no shadow remain only purity,’” read the young pony.

“Yes,,” mused Luna, “And from that we determined that some mare will ...shatter the sol... which no doubt means to shatter the sun, sol is the word for sun, - to break it into it’s color spectrum - a rainbow, and ...let no shadow remain... we took to mean removed all shadow of doubt as to the role of the Mane Six. The purity seemed to be a reference to Rainbow Dash as an Elite Pegasus. The alignment of the planets with the other part of the prophecy suggested that one of these three nights would see a visit to our castle by Rainbow Dash.”

“It appears that more of the prophecy has revealed itself on the scroll where nothing before existed.”

“As it has these last weeks. Read again what does the scroll say now”

“Yes my Princess, She of which the earth shall not corrupt nor shatter…” Acuta instinctively stopped.

“What could that mean? Earth, of course earth pony, but corrupt? Shatter? Does that mean anything to you Acuta?”

“I understand the pony Applejack is the element of…”

“Honesty! Of course! And not shatter - the loss of her parents was a horrific blow, but it did not shatter her. I so look forward to your meeting her, Acuta. She is a pony of…well like no other. The loss of her parents would have crippled other souls, but that little pony has such a heart as I have never seen...”

Applejack, standing stock still in the dark library, squeezed her eyes tight, inhaling deeply, pushing down her pain. The tears still fell.

The young pony continued, “...shall become of a treasure of the soul within the sol seomar leapa alpha wherein consummation let no shadow remain only purity.’ Your Highness, Those are the Scoltish words for bed chamber. Does not the Apple family come from Scoltand?”

“Yes,” answered Luna, “go on Acuta.”

“Of course, ‘...of forever shines will lay with the princess high above.”

“So Acuta, we were correct in our supposition about a pony of gold - her coat and mane. I can not thank you enough for once again helping me Acuta. Are you sure that there is nothing else contained within the prophecy that regards the earth pony Applejack?”

“Nothing, your highness.”

“Celestia and I were of a mind and certain it would be Rainbow Dash,” There was a pause. “I wonder if there is not a mistake. The prophecy speaks of immense power, rivaling that of an Alicorn! The rainbow pegasus is not only an Elite Pegasus, but she is a Magnus Elite. I do not understand how we could be wrong.”

Applejack heard this and slowly crept closer to the opening. Peering down the curving stairway, she saw a window recessed into the right side of the curving wall. It was a tall window of leaded glass that curved up to a point at the top. In the window’s reflection she could see the two ponies. The stairway only went down a quarter turn or so, maybe less before opening into a room, though Applejack couldn’t see much beyond the two figures there reflected in the glass.

It was then that Applejack, to her astonishment, saw not only that Acuta was a bat pony, but that she was incredibly beautiful. Her coat was a luxurious dark gray-purple. Her mane and tail were as golden a blonde as Applejack’s. Her irises were a golden brown, or at least the left one was, over the right eye she wore a patch. Her countenance betrayed a maturity far beyond what her apparent years suggested.

Actua moved toward the stairway and took two steps up to the window. She reached forward with her hoof and opened it. It was hinged on the side and opened outward, much like a door. Somewhere in her mind Applejack knew this was wrong. That window should have opened onto a wall of granite, yet when she opened it, flakes of show blew in. Even back from the edge of the opening, Applejack could feel the cold blast of wind.

The beautiful young pony closed her eyes, tilted her head back regally and took a deep breath of the cold night air. Applejack drew in a breath of the air that had passed over the bat pony’s body. It carried the scents of nightshade and spices from the desert. It was mystical and exotic and intoxicating. Applejack felt an incredible desire to go to this young pony, felt drawn to her.. What had Luna called her? Acuta? A rare name for this rare creature..

The bat pony spoke as much to Luna as to herself. She barely seemed aware she was speaking as though in a dream.

“It is still snowing out…”

In the darkness of the library Applejack realized she couldn’t be seen in the reflection. Instinct told her not to move, to fight an impulse to go to Acuta.

Luna stepped toward the young bat pony. Acuta’s smile brought one to Applejack. The young bat pony looked up at the Princess with happiness and trust on her face. Seeing Luna’s face had a powerful effect on the farm pony, reminding Applejack of how much she cared for her. Then suddenly an intense jealousy,unexpected and unbidden filled Applejack.upsetting her but mores so angering her. To deny it was foolish. Luna was trying to come between herself and Acuta.

Far in the distant part of the library there was a sound, then Applejack heard Celestia call out softly, “Luna?, are you here?”

“Yes sister, I’m here in the vault.” Luna turned and whispered to Acuta “Thank you my little love. You are as precious to me as if you were my own.”

Again, jealousy flared in Applejack. She stood and took a step forward as the Princess of the Night leaned toward Acuta and kissed her forehead. Applejack froze, fully prepared to attack Luna should she kiss Acuta on the lips.

“I could love you no more if I was.” answered the bat pony.

Pain suddenly filled Applejack’s heart and she took a step backward as emotion swept through her, bringing her to the verge of tears.

“You must go now, before my sister gets near. She must never see you. If she even suspects, our plans will fail.”

Acuta bowed before the Princess, “I understand completely my Princess,”. As she turned, and stepped up to the ledge of the open window, she turned back and smiled. The young farm pony was utterly charmed. She sat down and sighed. Without another word Acuta turned and leapt into the snowy night as flakes of snow blew in and fell, melting as they landed on the warm stone steps. Luna’s magic closed the window and pulled the iron handle down, latching it.

The farm pony scowled and looked around slightly confused. She remembered walking to the library and approaching the opening in the floor. It was all very vague and jumbled after that. Suddenly a familiar voice rang out from the library entrance:

“SISTER!!”

Celestia’s tone was neither joyous at the reunion nor angry over some sibling issue. It was on the verge of hysterics.

“Cele! When did you return?! I did not-”

“WHERE IS TWILIGHT?!!!”

“Excuse me?”

“She did NOT report for the Ordeals!! What has been happening in my absence??!!”

Luna turned around, her eyes wide in shock.“WHAT?! There must be some mistake, she has been preparing for it most of her life! I have heard nothing, save the enormous snow storm that blanketed us.” “I-I’ve heard nothing of her disappearance nor has there been any news of problems in Ponyville.”

“I just found out from…him. I’ll have to speak with the council in the morning. Where could she have gone? What could have possibly happened to keep her from them? I can think of nothing more important to her than completing those. There is nothing I can do now, they told me they thought she was far too young. It seems they were right.”

The sound of their hooves on the thick carpeting as they paced nervously was the only noise in the library. As they passed they looked each other in the eyes then stopped. In the vast stillness of the immense library there was another sound. A pony in deep pain, sobbing wretchedly, unable to hold it in but struggling nonetheless.

Luna’s eyes went wide in fear at the potential witness to her rendezvous. Hopefully Acuta had employed her enchantment spell.

The two of them immediately ran toward the sound. As they turned down the aisle between the bookshelves the came upon a pitiful site. Applejack sat there, looking up at them, her ears folded back, tears streaming down her face, the visage of utter agony. The pain in her large green eyes tore at Celestia’s heart and she went to her and took her in her arms. “My child, what is wrong?”

“It’s all my fault. I’m the reason Twilight didn’t go to them,” Applejack said, choking back a sob.

“What?”

“I was helping her clean up after the party for Rarity and Spike goin on their trip. A bookcase or something fell over on me and knocked me out.”

“WHAT??!! Oh sweetie, are you okay?” Luna and Celestia began looking closely at her scalp. “Yes, I see the stitches. It appears to be healing nicely.”

“Well they tell me when I woke up I didn’t know who I was. I was terrified and Twilight took care of me. That was when we had that real bad snow. We were snowed into the library together all alone.”

The two princesses looked up at each other, sharing a single thought.

“I see,” Celestia said. There was more than a little reproach in her tone. “So what happened?” she asked, trying to keep her anger from seeping in.

Applejack looked up at her. The coldness she saw there made the little pony shrink away. Her chin began quivering as tears spilled from the corners of her eyes. She fought with all her strength to keep it all from overwhelming her., “I-I don’t know. I woke up a yesterday and the last thing I remember was that bookcase falling. I wish I could remember but I can’t.” Applejack, hoping for understanding but not seeing any, felt anger rising in her, The thoughts that she wouldn’t give a voice to burst through, the sense of possible betrayal from her closest friend at the cost of their friendship, the guilt of depriving her friend of her life’s dream and at the core of it the real nature of that new relationship. She backed away from the two sisters, her tear filled eyes now filled with rage.

“I don’t KNOWwhat happened!! Did we fall in love?” She screamed, trembling with anger, “Did the two of us have SEX? ‘Cause that’s what y’all are thinkin! I know it’s what I’m thinkin! Well I DON’T FUCKIN’ KNOW!!”

Celestia and Luna stepped back, shocked at the anger and worried about their beloved pony. “Calm down my child,” Celestia said, taking a step toward her. Applejack backed up, her stance like a wild cat being cornered. The rage in her voice was terrifying and she aimed her fury at them both.

“What do YOU know about it?” she screamed, “I may have lost my best friend! I may have cost her everything she wanted… FOR NOTHING!! What did she do to me when I didnt’ even know who I was? IAM NOT IN LOVE WITH HER AND NOTHIN IS EVER GONNA CHANGE THAT!!”

Applejack felt like her heart was going to rip through her chest as she stood there panting, both scared and furious. She felt cornered as if everything was closing in on her and stood defensively, her legs wide apart in an attack stance., She looked from one sister to another, and as she what she saw caught her utterly off guard. She had been so blind with rage that she hadn’t noticed that the sisters were crying.

Celestia spoke softly, “You’re right, I know nothing about it, and I certainly don’t know what to say. I only ask you to look in your heart and think about Twilight and the love you two share. Could you ever imagine her doing those things to you?”

But Applejack had begun to look ill, she had become unsteady on her hooves. Just as she collapsed, both sisters caught her in a gentle field of magic. The last thing she felt was the tingle of being teleported, but before the bang, it all went black.

Applejack once again felt wonderfully warm and safe, surrounded by what felt like a fortress, only now, as she came up from the depths of sleep, it did not depart. The scent of the princess was everywhere. The room was dark and the fire was warm. Celestia cradled her like a foal.

Celestia’s safety could only go so far. Deep inside, Applejack’s first thoughts were those of being overwhelmed. Everywhere she looked her prospects seemed dark, there was no way out of this. The sight of the two sisters crying was proof that even they couldn’t fix this and now everypony would suffer and everything would change. It had been so wonderful but that world couldn’t last forever. If Twilight loved her enough to give up her life’s dream for her, there would be no going back to how things used to be. The little pony felt her heart sink like a stone.

Applejack opened her eyes and looked up at Princess Celestia. The princess smiled “Are you hungry? Would you like something to eat? I know you love apple souffle, especially the way Creme Brulee makes it. There is some right here.”

Applejack sighed, “I don’t even know where she is.”

“Let’s not worry about that right now, we’ll take care of that soon.”

Applejack nodded. “Oh, sorry about the robe, I kinda borrowed it.”

“Do you like it? It’s a little big but I can have it altered.”

“No, but thank you. I didn’t mean to go snooping in your closet,”

“Don’t be silly.” Celestia carried the robe back to the closet in her magical field. While hanging the robe back in the closet, Celestia spotted the little door in the back was open.

“I see you found her “sad place.” In an instant Applejack knew exactly who “her” was. “I guess I’d forgotten it was even there.” the princess continued, “I built that little stairway for Twilight to sneak up and down so she could hide in my closet and read. When she was very upset she would go there and read and color. Even with all her advanced gifts, she was still a little filly with the heart of a little filly. There were times when she would not come to me for help or go to anypony. She wanted to be alone. The first time she disappeared there I practically tore Canterlot apart looking for her. Ask Fancy Pants - he’ll tell you. I practically obliterated my nephew Blue Blood when he said something thoughtless to me about it. I hadn’t been that upset since I had to banish Luna. Later that night, after one of the worst days of my life, I lay in my bed trying to decide what to do. I decided I would go to try to find an old friend who I knew could help me find her. I went into the closet to get some clothes and discovered her curled up in a little ball, asleep all the way in the back. There were crumpled tissues all over the floor and that book ‘The Lonely Pony’ clutched in her arms. I had to fight every instinct to go to her. I don’t know what stopped me, but I’m glad it did. I realized that she had wanted to be alone, to think things through for herself. I went back out to this bed, lay down and cried. I don’t think I had cried that hard since Luna. To think that there were some things that I couldn't make allright. That there were parts of her that were beyond my reach. It was incredibly painful. Then suddenly there she was. My crying had woken her up and she had crawled into bed with me and was asking me what was wrong and how she could help. I just took her in my arms and hugged her. Then she tickled me, and I tickled her and we ended up laughing and kidding around. I never asked her about where she had been, only whether she was alright. When it came to her ‘sad place’ I decided that I would respect that, that since she was perfectly safe there I would never interfere. Later that week using my powers I cut that passageway in that led down behind the tapestry. We never spoke of it, but we both knew.”

Applejack thought of Twilight now, off somewhere alone in Equestria, or the badlands or who knows where, And she was hurting badly and there was nothing Applejack could do to take away the pain. The thought was wrenching and threatened the brittle shell that barely allowed Applejack to control the pain. The words that came to her mind were spoken before she could think and the shell was shattered like a hollow sphere of crystal.

“She still has the heart of a filly.”

The last word was barely a whisper. Celestia pulled her close and leaned over her protectively. The princess whispered softly in her ear, “Yes she does, I’m sorry for my reaction in the library. It was disrespectful of both of you and I deeply apologize.”

Applejack nodded but kept her head tucked into Celestia’s chest. She fought the tears, but each time she seemed to get them under control, she thought about a life without Twilight and was instantly overcome with grief.

“I cannot imagine what this is like for you, but we need to find out the facts before we jump to any conclusions. You need to give yourself time and we will see it through together.”

Applejack drew back and wiped her muzzle and eyes with the back of her hoof. A warm damp washcloth appeared and took on the task, gently cleaning her face and wiping the tears from her cheeks. Her breathing was shaky but she managed to summon her strength and look up. Her face was devoid of expression other than a dead determination, “If you mean that then you have to help me.”

“Of course I mean that. Tell me how I can help.”

“Well maybe during that time, Twilight mentioned something about where she was going, but now I don’t remember it. I was thinking back about that time at the Golden Oaks when Twilight went, uh, got too serious about her studies, you helped us forget some of the things that happened. Do you reckon you could do something like that in reverse? Help me to remember”

“I see. Applejack, you need to understand what you are asking and how dangerous it is. Closing a part of the brain that contains an experience is very tricky and quite difficult, Finding memories is far more challenging. It requires many different spells that are used to locate memories. There is no way to know what memories reside in a location. Every thought you’d ever had would be open to me. I can’t imagine anypony allowing that.”

“Does that mean you won’t do it?”

“I wish I could, but the risks are tremendous and surely you don’t want me seeing your most secret thoughts.”

“I don’t mind, I ain’t got nothin to hide.”

Celestia chuckled “I’m sure you don’t my child, but there are also terrible risks. There is a possibility that you could lose a great deal of memories should I fail. Do you remember racing Rainbow Dash? Or comforting Apple Bloom? Or meeting Twilight? Any or all of those could be lost.”

Applejack felt as though the floor was falling out from under her as the thought of losing a lifetime of memories confronted her.

“I took quite a risk doing what I did to help you before, but I couldn’t let you suffer. Still it was incredibly reckless.”

Applejack thought about Twilight out there alone and suffering. She thought about her own life without Twilight there.

“I know what your sayin, but I can’t live like this. We both know that Twilight could have done that shape shift thing and we’ll never find her!”

Now it was Celestia’s turn to confront her own limitations and consider the possibilities. The idea of never seeing a pony she thought of as her own, her child struck her hard.. She didn’t let the thought last, it would have been far too painful.

“I seriously doubt that, it would mean sacrificing her magical abilities…”

“She’s already sacrificed her life’s dream!!”

Celestia felt a bolt of panic shoot through her chest and was unable to keep her face from showing it. .

“See? We both know what we have to do!” Applejack insisted.

It was time for truth and Celestia lay it before the earth pony. “You wish to find out more than just clues as to where Twilight might have gone, don’t you?”

The stillness of the room was broken only by the logs crackling in the hearth.

“Applejack?”

The young pony had dropped her gaze and looked at the bedspread. She nodded.

“You wish to know what really happened during the time you lost your memory.”

Another nod.

“Even if you discover the thing of which you are most afraid?”

Applejack didn’t move.

“We both know what that is, don’t we?”

The nod was almost imperceptible.

“It has nothing to do with you and Twilight having a sexual relationship does it?”

A tiny shake of the head.

Celestia’s voice was soft and certain. “You have been telling yourself that what you fear is finding out you had a romantic physical relationship with Twilight or that she took advantage of the situation to satisfy some sexual curiosity. But the two of you making love in the middle of Ponyville at mid-day would be filly’s play when compared with what you truly fear, wouldn’t it?”

Applejack did not move. It took every ounce of her strength not to succumb emotionally to the threat that stood at the center of the storm

“You are afraid that Twilight fell in love with a pony that lived for only two weeks. A pony that looked like you but that was all. A pony that needed her and knew she could trust her. A pony that Twilight invited into that place in her heart we reserve for our first love. And now that place has been torn from her and everytime she sees you she’ll think of her. And you know you can never be that pony and never take away that pain…”

At those words, Applejack’s heart released a something dark, something so great that it made her shake. It broke through and the sound of it brought a wrenching pain to the monarch. There were very few times over the thousands of years of her life, that Celestia had felt the anguish of what it means to be utterly powerless to comfort one who you would die for. What she heard in the little earth pony’s sobs were almost too much for her to bear. She wanted to go to her and hold her, but even that gesture seemed a sad attempt of giving comfort. She wanted Applejack to tell her not to do what she had asked. To forget it. She took her other daughter into her arms and held her, but Applejack barely knew she was there, she sobbed and shook but did not make a sound.

“I’m so sorry my little love but I don’t think I could bare losing you. You know how I feel for you, I could not love my own child more. I beg you not to ask me to do this,” As Celestia gave in to her fear and grief it found it’s way through her voice and tears. “Please Applejack, I love you so, don’t make me do something that could end in a tragedy from which I could never forgive myself.”

Applejack looked up at her. The strength of the little pony’s heart left Celestia in awe, “What about Twilight?”

It was meant as a fierce reproach, shaming the Princess of Equestria for putting her own feelings before the welfare of her most beloved. And while it hit its mark, it went far beyond. It went to a place Celestia knew Applejack had not considered. The thought left the monarch utterly numb. She forgot about Applejack, about herself, about her nation.

Had Twilight found herself faced with this same decision with Applejack’s amnesia?. Did she use her magic to try to make Applejack whole and restore her to her family, despite the risk that she would lose her love? The amount of courage that act took left the Princess completely humbled. One does not teach values like that, that is something so deep inside that it cannot be learned. That little alicorn would be a far better ruler than she could ever hope to be.

Celestia took Applejack’s face in her hooves and raised it so she could look into her eyes. In that moment Applejack saw the decision had been made.

“Thank you Princess.” With that she threw her arms around her and hugged her,feeling a flood of emotions.. Celestia held on and thought about her most faithful student, hoping that she could live up to the example that little pony set.

Gradually Applejack’s tears subsided and she was able to regain control. She leaned back and let Celestia clean her face and mane.

“We will start in the morning.”

Applejack’s stomach tightened . Celestia’s countenance and expression carried a solemnity that suddenly made the risks very real. There was nothing left for either of them to say. Another thought occurred to Applejack, the other part of the equation, what else the princess might find as she looked for the memories of what had happened during those two weeks. She quickly looked up at the ruling monarch only to discover that she’d been waiting for Applejack to recall this part of the process. The personal part, where she might come across some very personal things. Her tone was very matter-of-fact but her gaze was steady.

“So Applejack, tell me, do you masturbate?”

Applejack’s felt her cheeks burning. The young pony didn’t know the word. but was pretty sure she knew what she meant. She also knew that this was a little test, to see if she really understood all that Celestia had told her.

“Yes ma'am. At least I try to. About once a week. I ain’t sure I got the hang of it yet. Sometimes I do it in the bathtub, sometimes in bed before I go to sleep and sometimes, out in the orchard when I’m feelin a might frisky. One romance book a counsellor at camp gave me to read talked about there bein somethin called a climax where you see fireworks I’ve never seen anything like that but it still feels good just rubbing myself down there.”

Celestia’s cheeks were a brighter shade of red than Applejack’s. Applejack loved that she had turned the tables. Celestia blinked once or twice. Applejack smiled ruefully.

“Yeah, that book calls it a pussy which is kind of a strange name for it. But yeah, I like to rub it. Is that what you wanted to know? You know that book talked about using a candle…”

“Eee-nough! That’s fine. I see you get the point.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow and smiled, “I see you do too.”

Celestia’s eye wrinkled as the smiled. “When it comes down to it I often wonder which of you two is smarter.”

After a moment the earth pony started to look woozy.

“Are you alright my child?”

“Uh, yeah. I was just thinkin about what I was just sayin. Can we please pretend I never said it?”

“Of course. And for the record,you’re not the only one in that club,” she said with a wink.”

Applejack froze, mouth agape, eyes as wide as they’d ever been.

“Ah, and here’s our fresh batch of apple souffles. Hungry?”

“Please sweetie, eat something.”

“Why ain’t life fair?”

“Oh honey, I wish I could make it fair, but that is beyond my power.”

“I lost my folks and that ain’t right. Now I lose Twilight my best friend.”

“We’ll find her, don’t worry.”

“That ain’t what I mean. No matter what happens, things ain’t gonna be the same.”

“But you don’t know that anything happened. It isn’t fair to Twilight to think that it did.”

“If you’re being honest, you know that’s the only thing that makes sense. You didn’t see the letter. She was all upset because when she saw I was really sick she realized that her feelings for me were more than just a friend. I’ve looked and I’ve looked and I just can’t see the two of us like that. Me kissing Twilight on the lips?”

“Would it really be all that bad?”

“Princess!!”

“There are plenty of mares who love each other in my kingdom. What’s wrong with the idea? You know Lyra and Bon Bon.”

“Yeah, but that’s them, it ain’t me.”

“Let’s not worry about that, shall we? We both need to get some sleep to prepare for this.”
“Yes ma’am.”

“Okay, now go climb into bed. I need to speak to Luna, but I’ll be back shortly.”

Applejack climbed into the bed and pulled the covers up. As Celestia was about to close the door she turned around to look.

Applejack lay on her side, her head on the pillow, “Good night,” she said then paused and softly said, “...mama”

In a moment the Princess was there, holding the pony she’d loved as her own close to her chest

“Yes, my little one,” she said with a sniff, “Good night.”

It was dark when Applejack awoke. She looked over at the fireplace and saw Celestia was there, sitting in a rocking chair just watching her. There was a huge tray of food on the small dining table and the room smelled delicious.

“How long have I been asleep?”

“Oh, about a day. It’s almost 9 at night. I wanted to make sure both of us had a long rest.”

“Oh, okay.”

“Why don’t we have something to eat?”

“That sure sounds like a great idea.” Applejack slid out of bed and trotted over to the table as Celestia joined her.

The farm pony dug in heartily, clearly enjoying every bite. Celestia sipped tea from a cup.

“You must understand I cannot promise you anything. You may wake up and remember nothing of what happened or you may remember it all. Should the latter be the case then it might come as a shock. You’ll have to reconcile who you are now with who you were then. Should that be the case I will not let you leave the palace. You’ll need counselling to come to terms with it. You may recall having sex with Twilight and…”

“PRINCESS!! DO YOU MIND? I’m eating here!?”

“And that is just my point. THere is no telling how you’ll react. I only ask that you try to stay calm. Just don’t expect too much and if things are frightening when you awaken, just know that I’m here and that there is no pony in all of Equestria who loves you more.”

They looked at each other knowing that might not be entirely true...

As she ate her buckwheat pancakes, Celestia mused, “You know it’s funny, each of you are so different. When Rainbow is upset, she gets angry. When Fluttershy is upset, she gets very quiet and putters around the cottage, doing the same task over and over. When Pinkie Pie is upset she grins somewhat maniacally in an effort to hide it and when Rarity is upset, well EVERYpony knows when Rarity is upset - at least they had better. When Twilight is upset, she reads those awful romance novels and cries.”

She took a sip of tea, “You, on the other hoof, you are very quiet. You summon that ancient iron Scoltish will the Apples brought with them from the Highland’s and you grit your way through it. You only cry when you’re happy, never when you’re sad - you save that for the inside, I know.”

Applejack smiled and nodded. “Well that was real fine meal. Can we get started?”

Celestia sighed “I suppose so…”

Applejack blushed as she saw the look of admiration in those eyes. Then she saw another look, one that suggested the Princess was going to make one last try. But Applejack beat her to the punch.

“Y’all want to know what I think about when I rub my, you know, my pus…”

“Okay, okay, you win. Go lie down and relax.” Celestia went over and sat beside the bed. As the young pony closed her eyes, Celesiat placed her forehooves on her frontal lobes. WIth her thunderhooves, she gently massaged the blonde coat. “Does that bother you?”

“No ma’am, it feel nice…”

“Okay, good, now just let yourself relax…”

…………….